Begin to Begin (26 page)

He was there that night. There is no denying that. But I believe him when he says he didn’t know.

Amelia is right. From the minute that he knew the truth, he fought to give justice to Benji. He fought to give me happiness. But I don’t think he realized how much sadness it would bring me as well.

Once I’m home, I slip off my shoes and I don’t even make it to my bedroom before I start removing my clothes. I’m exhausted and I actually feel like I can sleep tonight.

As I’m pulling on my oversized t-shirt, I hear my phone ding with a new text.

Dalton: I know you need space. Just wanted to make sure you got home OK.

Me: Yes, just got home. Thank you for checking

I send him the text back and wait for a few moments to see if he will send anything back. He doesn’t.

Lying in my bed, I fall asleep with memories of Dalton and myself and the times we’ve spent together dancing through my head.

******

It’s been over a week since I have seen Dalton. And it’s absolutely killing me. Once the anger was drained from my body, all that was left was my want and need for him.

Amelia is the only person I have really talked to about everything. Joey, to my surprise, is indifferent to the entire situation now. I told him everything that Dalton told me. Him being the only person as close to Benji as I am, it was important for me to know how he felt. If he could forgive Dalton.

He did. He said that Benji would want him to forgive. And he’s right.

But now here I am, driving back to the garage. I can’t continue on without him in my life anymore. He came into it with such a force that he’s left a permanent mark on my heart. It belongs to him now. And it’s time for me to give it back to him.

I pull into the dirt driveway, the gravel crunching beneath my tires. It’s not quite dark out yet and the sun casts a bright orange glow into the distance. I glance over and see that his uncle Mel and aunt Dot’s home seems quiet.

There is a light on in the garage, though. It’s in the office. I don’t see Liam’s car here so I’m guessing that he has already left for the day.

The door is unlocked so I let myself in, hoping that Dalton is in the office.

Looking throughout the garage as I make my way to his office, I notice how neat it is since I was here last. When I would come here months ago, it was cleaned and organized. Not what you would expect. But when I was here a week ago. It was a mess. It appeared like Dalton and Liam just threw everything on the floor when they were done with it. Empty take-out containers and cups scattered throughout.

But tonight it’s clean again, and I smile, wondering if Dalton cleaned up because he anticipated my return.

His office door is open just a crack, and I can see him inside, sitting behind his desk. He’s working away on the laptop we bought together. He really is a natural at this, and I think he will have an amazing business one day, if that’s what he wants. He seems to be in deep concentration, with his brows drawn together over his deep green eyes.

My light knock to the door startles him and his gaze jerks up to meet mine. He gapes at me and slides back on his chair.

“Marin. Hi. What … what are you doing here?” he asks, clearly surprised to see me.

I walk into the office further, not even sure how to start the conversation. He meets me in the middle of the room. He is so beautiful, but his heart makes his beauty catch fire. It’s the best part of him, and I don’t want to lose it.

Reaching up, I touch his cheek, much like the last time I was here. The only difference being I’m not leaving this time.

“Dalton …” I breathe out.

He leans down and rests his forehead against mine. Not sure what else needs to be said, I lean up and touch his lips with mine. He is surprised in that first brief second that our lips touch, but then he falls into me.

“I’ve missed you so much,” he whispers.

“I didn’t want to admit it to myself at first but I missed you so much,” I tell him. That’s all it takes. Those few, simple words and he’s mine again and I am his.

He kisses me so deeply that I don’t want it to end. I want it to last forever.

“When you left last week, I thought I would never get you back.” He whispers into my hair. “Please tell me, that I’m getting the chance to be the man you need.”

How can I say no to that, when every word that comes from his mouth makes me melt into a puddle of goo.

“Dalton, from the moment I met you, I’ve belonged to you. I just didn’t know it at first.”

He presses his lips to mine again and slips one hand around my waist and the other into my hair. He pulls back a fraction of an inch, still resting his forehead to mine.

“Come on. Let’s go upstairs,” he says as he grabs my hand in his and leads me out of the office. He doesn’t even turn the lights out as he pulls me out the door and over to the stairs. We walk hand in hand up the stairs with me following behind.

Inside, he only lets go of me long enough to walk to his bed and turn on the dim lamp. It casts a soft yellow glow over the apartment.

He turns and faces me, not walking toward me yet but letting his eyes roam all over my body. I walk to him and place my hands on his broad chest.

“I love you, Dalton. I can’t be without you any longer.”

He leans down and whispers against my hair near my ear, “I love you so much, Marin. You make me alive. Without you, I am nothing.”

I want him to see me. I want him to have me.

I’m not here to give him just my heart, but my body as well. I want him to know that he owns all of me.

Stepping back, I reach for the bottom of my shirt and pull it over my head swiftly and then reach down to unbutton my shorts and slide them down my legs. I remove my bra and panties next.

He watches me with heat in his eyes as I stand bared before him.

Dalton pulls his shirt over his head and then removes his jeans. Once again, he has no underwear on and I can only smirk.

We both take a step toward each other, and then, very gently, he lifts me in his arms and carries me to his bed.

Every drop of heartache is left behind. All that is left between us is love.

I give him all of me—heart, body and soul. And he gives me all of him.

Every day I thank God that she came back to me. I was sure she wouldn’t, hell she had every right not to. But here we are today. Together. And there isn’t anything in this world that could separate us.

She tells me all the time how I saved her and helped her realize that she could love again. But what she doesn’t realize is that she saved me. If it wasn’t for her, I probably would have eventually gone back to the life I led before. The life full of crime and nothingness.

I didn’t think I would ever get to this point in my life. Standing here waiting for her to join me and become one. I didn’t even think that was something I wanted in life until I met her. I can’t help but remember the night I proposed. It was by far one of the scariest nights of my life. We talked about marriage some, but I knew Marin’s uncertainty because of what she’s gone through. I never wanted to push the issue. Hell, if she would have said no I would have been crushed but I would have never left her side. I want her no matter what.

The coastal breeze off the coast of Sanibel Island blows Marin’s long dark hair around her face. It’s gotten so long over the last several months, and I love running my hands through it.

We came to Sanibel for the weekend. I wanted to get her away. She’s been so busy lately she really needed to destress. And I had another reason I wanted to bring her here. I haven’t told anyone. Not even Uncle Mel. But I want to ask her to be my wife.

She will probably say no. Not because she doesn’t love me, because I know she does, but because she is afraid.

Afraid that something tragic will happen again. But I will never let anything happen to her and I’m going to do everything in my power to not let anything happen to me, for her.

The ring is burning a hole in my pocket. I picked it out about a month ago—a teardrop-shaped diamond in a platinum band.

She stands on the balcony overlooking the ocean waves. Walking up behind her, I wrap myself around her from behind, pulling her in close to me.

“I love you so damn much, Marin. You make me happier than I could have ever imagined being.”

She stays silent but runs her fingers over my hands that are clasped at her waist. I move her hair out of the way and place kisses to the nape of her neck and she lets out a hum of appreciation. I run my hands up her silky, soft-pink robe to the top where it gapes open slightly and slip my hand inside.

Leaning in, I whisper into her ear, “I want you to be my wife, Marin.”

She gasps at my revelation.

“You don’t have to say anything right now. I just want you to know that I want to wake every morning with you in my arms and fall asleep every night with your body curled around me. You are my sole reason for living.”

She turns in my arms and pulls my mouth down to meet hers. She kisses me fervently, to the point that I want her right now on this balcony.

But before I get a chance to carry her to the chair in the corner and bury myself deep inside her, she pulls away from me, with tears in her eyes.

This is it. She’s going to say no.

“I love you, Dalton. I love you more than I thought I would ever be able to love someone. I was given the rare gift of loving again when you walked into my life. I thought losing Benji ruined me. But I was wrong. You ruined me, Dalton. You ruined me to the point that I will never be able to survive without you in my life.”

I watch her, every word that comes out of her mouth making my heart feel like it will implode.

“I want to be with you for the rest of my life. Forever.” Tears stream down her cheeks, and I reach in to wipe them away.

“Ask me again,” she says.

I’m so taken back by this I just stare at her and then she repeats herself, “Dalton Young, ask me … again.”

I reach into my pocket and pull out the small ring. I drop to my knee and look up in her eyes. I want to do this right afterall.

“Marin Thompson, saying I love you doesn’t simply explain how much you mean to me. Without you, there is no me. I want to be beside you every step that you take. I want to be inside of you ever minute of every day and I want to be the man that gives you everything you have ever wanted. Say you will be my wife. That you will become mine forever, because by god, I already belong to you.”

She sobs through my entire impromptu speech and drops to her knees and throws her arms around me and leans in to my ear and whispers, “Yes, Dalton. I will marry you, but I already belonged to you.”

And here we are now, surrounded by our closest friends, ready to become husband and wife. I know this is a bittersweet moment for her, even though I don’t have any doubt she loves me.

The first time she was supposed to do this, it ended in heartache and despair. It’s one of the main reasons she wanted to have the ceremony at the courthouse.

Uncle Mel and Aunt Dot are here and beside them is Cole and his husband. Standing up here beside me is Liam, and funny enough, he can’t seem to keep his eyes off of Gwenn who flew down from New York for the ceremony. I actually surprised Marin with that; she had no idea Gwenn would be here.

And walking with Marin down the aisle are Amelia and Joey. She wanted them both by her side.

I love this woman with everything in me, and I will cherish and protect her for the rest of my life. I will give her everything she wants and needs because she is all I will ever need.

We may not have had the easiest journey to get to this point, but now that we have it, we are never letting it go.

The End

This book almost didn’t happen. There have been so many personal things happening in my life that, many times I wanted to just scrap it and start over. But there were people there that kept pushing me, telling me to not give up. So, without them, this book wouldn’t exist.

So, first I want to thank my AMAZING editor, Wendi Lynn. Seriously, girl, without you I don’t know how I would have finished. I know you had some issues on your end as well, but I think we made a pretty kick ass team in the end.

I would like to thank my family, especially my husband. He has dealt with my moody ass for over thirteen years now. And meeting deadlines just adds to my moodiness. He’s been a rock star through it all.

To my Beta readers, Michele and Stacey. You guys are awesome and read this for me so quick and on such short notice, I’m so very, very grateful. You two caught things that I just skimmed over and would have never thought to look back through for so THANK YOU!

To my Controlled Sisters (I can’t name all 106 or is it 105? Sav would know….), thank you for letting me vent at times and bouncing ideas off you ladies. You are all an amazing support system and I thank god all the time that I was able to find you all, even though I have never met any of you yet, it’s on my bucket list to meet each and every one of you one day!

Thank you to my readers, of course you are the sole reason that this book is here. So I hope you love it as much as I do!

A.S. Brown started her writing career last year with her first novel
Sober Addiction
.

When she's not writing, she enjoys spending time with family, reading, and dreaming up new ideas to write about.

She lives in Northeast Florida with her family and two geriatric dogs.

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Read her first book here:

Amazon - Sober Addiction