Believe Like a Child (28 page)
W
hen Alessa arrived at the physical therapist’s office, she was pleasantly surprised to see how nice everyone was to her. They all made her feel welcome. After filling out some papers, she was shown to a small room where her therapist would meet her. The woman at the front desk informed Alessa that he was the best therapist they had and if she followed his advice, she would be back on her feet in no time.
Alessa had been waiting for a few minutes when a tall man with blue eyes and light brown hair entered. He extended his long arm and took her hand in his.
“You must be Alessa,” he said. “I’m Remo and I will be working with you to get you moving and feeling better than you ever did.”
Alessa liked him immediately. There was an air about him of confidence and compassion. Remo watched her as she pushed through her pain and tried her best to acquire movement in her legs. His heart went out to her. She was an attractive girl, built beautifully, but her eyes were far older than the rest of her. He was intrigued and impressed by her drive and determination. Even though she told him that the very thought of therapy intimidated her, when it came to the crunch, she gave it her all.
Alessa too was pleasantly surprised by her impression of Remo. She felt safe with him. She knew instinctively that he would be supportive and that she could count on him to help her recover. As the hours wore on, they talked effortlessly and shared details about their life during their therapy session. They were going to spend a lot of time together over the next three months. So Alessa figured she’d better settle in and get acquainted with him.
Remo had been born in the city and raised by his foster parents, Patrick and Hannah. He regularly volunteered at homeless shelters, providing light physical therapy to some of their residents. He and Alessa had a similar sense of humor and neither of them had ever been in a serious relationship. Like her, he was aiming for a better life and had decided to go to college to become a physical therapist. His childhood had been normal and his foster parents had eventually adopted him. He loved them both dearly and had dinner with them at least once a week. He lived alone and liked to do just about everything. He even cooked for himself.
Though Remo had disclosed a great deal about himself, Alessa found herself at loss for words when asked about her own background.
She hesitated before saying, “Well, my childhood wasn’t exactly great. It was really hard, actually, and I’d rather not talk about it.”
She was petrified he would be repulsed if he knew the truth and she didn’t want to start off on the wrong foot with him. Remo was wise for his years and figured Alessa would eventually tell him her story, but was content to have her focus on her recovery for now. Often, he had had to spend time getting many of his patients psyched up to work hard on their therapy, but with Alessa, that was not necessary. Without any prompting from him, she would launch herself into her therapy, gritting her teeth to get her through the pain. He had discovered what a strong person she was and by the end of their first session, was glad she had been assigned to him.
Remo hadn’t been told much about Alessa’s history, other than that she had been victim to some kind of an incident a couple of weeks ago that had injured her badly. He figured it couldn’t be domestic violence, since she had already told him about never having been in a serious relationship. Remo was respectful of people’s privacy and knew if she wanted to tell him more, she would, over time.
Alessa shared more of her life, as their sessions went on. She told Remo that she and her little sister, Lucy, lived together at the Courtyard Apartments. Remo knew that was public housing, but didn’t let on that he knew.
“It’s public housing,” she told him. “We’ll only be there long enough for me to get a degree and find a good paying job. I applied for financial aid and I am trying to go to Philadelphia Community College.”
Remo was impressed and curious about her now. She was young, raising her sister on her own and had aspirations that would, if fulfilled, allow her to flee a life dependent on welfare. After a week of therapy, the two had become good friends. They talked about everything—except Alessa’s past.
Ebby had begun to notice that the girl was now paying a great deal of attention to her appearance before going to her therapy sessions. She would fuss over her hair until it was just right and even bought herself a couple of new outfits which she wore to her sessions.
Two weeks later, Ebby was driving Alessa to her therapy session with Remo. They had stopped at a red light, when she looked over at Alessa with a smirk.
“What? What are you smirking at?” Alessa asked her, a grin breaking through.
“Oh, I don’t know. Looks to me like you might have a crush on Remo. After all, new outfits, hair and make-up!” Ebby teased.
Alessa pretended to be shocked. “Oh, I do not! What’s wrong with wanting to look good?”
Ebby patted her hand. “Absolutely nothing, sweetie. Just wanted to point out that it isn’t going unnoticed, either by me or by him, I’m sure.”
Alessa looked worried. “Yeah, maybe so,” she mused worriedly, “but I haven’t told him about my past and he thinks Lucy is my sister. Once he finds out about everything, he won’t care how good I look.”
Ebby shook her head. “Don’t be so sure about that,” she told her. “I met him too, you know. This one is different I think maybe he’s one of the few good guys left. So you better snatch him up while you can.”
“Yeah, right. Whatever you say, Ebby. You’re so delusional. Men like Remo don’t want to be with a woman like me. I swear, sometimes you are so clueless! Don’t you know I’m destined to attract every asshole in Pennsylvania?” Alessa grinned, turning the whole thing into a joke.
Ebby became serious. “No, Alessa,” she said. “You aren’t destined to be with an asshole. You have traveled a rocky road so far and you deserve better. You’re unique and I think you’re very courageous. Once you believe in yourself, so will others. It’s called confidence.”
She drove the rest of the way in silence. Alessa did not speak either. Ebby pulled up in front of the Remo’s office.
“Go get ’em, tiger,” she growled.
Alessa laughed at Ebby’s optimism about her future and her conviction that she was something more than she believed herself to be.
A
s the months passed, Alessa became stronger and more mobile. She and Remo were very comfortable together, not just as therapist and patient, but as friends too. Often, after her therapy sessions with Remo were over, Alessa and Lucy would go with him and check on the homeless and volunteer time at shelters throughout Philadelphia. Lucy and Remo got along well and enjoyed each other’s company, especially when they were planning a silly prank on Alessa. Ebby was pleased for both girls. She could tell Remo was good for them and they enjoyed being together. Ebby often thought what a close-knit family the three of them would make.
As time wore on and the therapy sessions were nearing their end, Alessa realized how hard it would be for her, once she and Remo went their separate ways. She had got so used to his company. They had spent a lot of time together and while they would still carry on with their volunteer work, they would see each other a lot less now. They had shared much about their lives and Remo, along with Ebby, had encouraged Alessa to go to college. He had cheered her on, telling her she was smart enough to do anything she wanted to.
In her three months of therapy, Alessa had received financial aid for community college and started her first real college class. At first, she was apprehensive, aware that she had to pick up the skill of acquiring knowledge, something her childhood hadn’t taught her. However, with Remo and Ebby to support her, Alessa had found her groove in college and she was beginning to take it all in her stride. Lucy, for her part, was thrilled that Alessa had gone back to school. She told everyone they knew—and these were mostly homeless people—that Alessa was going to college.
By the time Alessa had completed her therapy, she was walking almost as normally as she had before the incident. At her last session, Remo asked her to dinner to celebrate. She was thrilled to be asked and promptly accepted the invitation. One the same day, Remo and the other therapists threw a small party, with balloons and a cake. They even invited Ebby and Lucy to it. Alessa was moved to tears and thanked them all for their kindness and their help with her recovery. They all admired her for being brave and capable of moving past whatever had happened to her just three short months earlier.
As Alessa was leaving, she turned to Remo and said, “I never could have done this without your help. You are an amazing therapist and I want to thank you for everything.”
In response, he reached out and gave her a hug. “You really worked hard, which made it easy for me to look like a rock star. Now go home and rest. We have a date tonight, remember? I’ll pick you up at seven. Wear something nice, because I’ve made a reservation at a restaurant I think you’ll love.”
Alessa smiled and gave him one last hug. She turned to Ebby and Lucy who were watching them with expressions of pure happiness on their faces. Remo walked over and picked the child up in his strong arms.
“Okay,” he boomed, “make sure Alessa is ready and on time tonight. I’ll see you on Saturday, when we go to the shelter.”
Lucy happily agreed to be Alessa’s “boss” and make sure she followed his instructions. She just loved it when Remo put her in charge of things. It made her feel needed.
As Alessa, Ebby and Lucy drove back to their apartment, Ebby asked, “You do have something to wear tonight, right?”
“Yes,” Alessa said happily. “It just so happens that I bought a little black dress a couple of weeks ago. I bought the whole outfit and shoes to match for 32 dollars at the thrift store near our apartment. The stuff doesn’t look used at all.”
Ebby was humbled by how accepting Alessa was. It didn’t matter to her that she would have to make do with a second-hand dress and shoes. That was the thing about her that moved Ebby to tears; she had never pretended to be someone other than the person she really was and she wasn’t afraid to let people know that she was content with the small, simple things in life.
Back at the apartment, Ebby prepared to babysit Lucy, while Alessa went out with Remo. Lucy turned on the television while the other two went to the kitchen for a glass of iced tea. Alessa looked anxious as they sat at the kitchen table.
“What’s wrong?” Ebby asked, perturbed. “Why do you look so upset?”
“Remo described tonight as a ‘date’. I’ve never been on a real date before. I’m not sure what I’m supposed to do. What if I do all the wrong things?”
“Alessa, pull yourself together,” Ebby said firmly. “You have spent a lot of time with Remo over the last three months in therapy and doing volunteer work. You don’t need to worry about tonight. Just be yourself.”
They both knew Alessa and Remo were drawn to each other. It was obvious to anyone who saw them together. They would always stand a little closer than necessary and their eye contact lingered for just a moment too long. It was no big secret they were attracted to each other.
“But Ebby,” Alessa persisted, “he doesn’t know anything about my past. Do you really think a guy like Remo is going to say that it’s no big deal that I was an exotic dancer? I mean, let’s be honest. I fucked men for money. That means I was a prostitute. This whole thing is just ridiculous!”
Then Ebby said something that surprised Alessa. “Just tell him the whole truth. He will either accept it or run as fast as he can. It’s his choice whether he wishes to win or lose. If he stays, he will win big. But if he runs, he will spend the rest of his life comparing every woman he meets with you. The important thing in life is not where you came from, but where you are going. You’re going places, Alessa.”
As always, Ebby had this knack of making her feel better about herself. With renewed confidence, Alessa said, “You’re right. You’re always right.”
At six-thirty p.m., Alessa emerged from her bedroom in her newly acquired second-hand dress and shoes. Ebby thought she looked beautiful. The black dress fit her perfectly. It showed off her flawless figure in a way that made her look sophisticated. Alessa had drawn her hair back and fastened it with a clip so that her natural curls flowed down her back. She looked young and vibrant. The night was hers and her life was just beginning.
When Remo knocked on the apartment door, Lucy darted forward to open it. He looked handsome in black pants and an ocean-blue shirt that further highlighted the blue of his eyes, if that were at all possible. When he saw Alessa, he had to catch his breath for a moment, before recovering sufficiently to tell her she looked great. Alessa hugged Lucy and Ebby and took Remo’s arm, heading out of the apartment into the warm night air. In her new optimism, she felt anything was possible. She had paid her dues and now it was time for her life to become her own. Tonight would determine if Remo was in it for the long haul. She planned to tell him everything. Or a lot of it anyway, because if he couldn’t accept who she had been in the life she was about to leave behind, she didn’t want to get romantically involved with him and include him in her future.