Beyond Ruin (2 page)

"Mister Fitzgerald?"

James looked up at the sound of his name, feeling as though he had just come out of a deep sleep. He was sitting at his desk, one hand frozen hovering just above the keyboard of his computer, the other hand propping up his unshaven chin.

"Mister Fitzgerald, you asked me to inform you when the pilot called? He called."

"Thank you, Alice," James intoned before clearing his throat and shuffling paperwork around on his desk. He searched his mind as though he was forgetting something, but whatever it was it felt lost in the fog. "Uh, what did he say?"

Alice was a patient woman. An old-school sort of lady with a no-nonsense attitude about what was proper in a professional work environment. A staple in the Los Angeles office of Fitson Entertainment Groupe since the doors first opened, Alice was a woman who had no two shits to give, and even James appreciated that she was immune to his charm. He, however, was not immune to the blistering stare she cast in his direction, clearly disappointed that he had slipped out of concentration on work for longer than a breath.

"That Misses Robertson has returned to the plane with your daughter and they will soon be departing New York."

He exhaled his relief. Frankie would be home with him before the night was over. "Would you call Kelly at
The Jacqueline
and ask her to make sure the kitchen in my suite is stocked? She has a list of what Frankie likes."

"That won't be necessary!" rang a recognizable voice.

James and Alice turned at the same time to find a very tall, very familiar looking blonde standing in the doorway to his office, a smile curving her lips.

"Misses Robertson," Alice greeted without a single trace of welcome in her voice.

James stood and rounded his desk. "Thank you, Alice. That will be all."

Dismissed, Alice left without another word, without so much as a glance at James or the blonde.

"Every time I see that woman I'm tempted to put on a scarf and gloves."

"Caroline," he said as he kissed her cheek.

"I went grocery shopping for you this afternoon," she said against his ear before stepping away to lower herself into one of the plush leather chairs placed opposite the desk. James resumed his place at his computer and exhaled forcefully.

"Thank you. I haven't had much time for running errands."

"You've been working a lot. I sometimes see you up working at the dining room table until midnight or later."

"Yes, well..." he trailed off before clearing his throat. "This place doesn't run itself. Have you talked to Celine?"

Caroline sighed and leaned back into her seat, forgetting her posture. "A few days ago. I'm sure our moms are fussing over her right this minute, making sure she's comfortable on her lily pad. That's my niece for you."

James emitted a soft
hmmm
noise and briefly nodded his head, though he hadn't really processed anything Caroline said about Celine. Truthfully he didn't care, but Caroline was a fair buffer now that lawyers were no longer involved in their matters.

"I need to ask you a question, James, and I'd appreciate your honesty regardless of how it makes either of us feel."

He quickly snapped out of his distraction and focused his attention on her. "Of course."

She took a moment for herself, collecting her breath as though steeling herself for what she was about to ask.

"The night of the party. All those years ago," she began. He knew immediately that she was referring to the party he and Audra had put together for school. The party that launched a billion dollar business, as it were. He was more than familiar with it. "Maybe it's a moot point now after all these years," she continued, casting her eyes down at her hands folded nonchalantly in her lap. A small laugh escaped her lips. "But I have to know."

"Know what?"

She looked up at him, any apparent trace of embarrassment gone. "Did you know you were with Celine that night? Or did you think she was me?"

Long ago, when James and Celine were in the infancy of their relationship, he pondered the answer to that very question endlessly, wondering if somewhere he'd made a misstep. It had been a long time since he considered the answer, and now, fresh in his mind, his marriage with Celine relegated to the past tense, the answer burned anew. Why was Celine even wondering to begin with?

"
Mister Fitzgerald
," Alice's crisp voice buzzed from the phone on his desk.

James cleared his throat and offered a brief but tight smile to Caroline. "What is it?" he asked, finger pressed on the intercom.

"Your realtor is on the line. He says he must speak with you immediately."

He glanced up at Caroline for a moment. She held her hands up, encouraging him to go about his business. He stabbed the line button on the phone and picked up the receiver.

"Michael. What's so urgent?"

"Mister Fitzgerald! I was hoping one day I'd have the honor of making this particular phone call to you. Are you sitting down?"

"I am," James replied, deciding to humor the man despite the lack of his own good humor.

"Villa Montecito is open."

James' heart nearly arrested on the spot. Villa Montecito was a name he had all but given up on ever hearing again, especially with all things considered.

"It's quiet for now. Word got out to a select few of us moments ago and you are the first call I've made."

"What's the asking?"

"Fifteen-nine. Still interested?"

Villa Montecito
. It was more than just a name. It was a promise. A promise for a life worth making any sacrifice for, worth any price paying for.

"When can I see it?"

"If you can make the drive up right now I guarantee you will be the first and only one to see it."

James consulted his watch. It was still early afternoon but traffic would be a nightmare getting out of the city. However, if he flew...

"I'll be there in an hour. Bring the paperwork with you."

"I'll text you the access code as soon as we're off the phone. See you soon, Mister Fitzgerald."

"See you soon." He quickly ended the call then punched a button, earpiece still at his ear. "Alice. Get Ian Jasper on the line. Tell him to chart a flight plan to Santa Barbara as soon as possible. And cancel the rest of my appointments today."

"
Ahem
."

James looked up at Caroline, having temporarily forgotten she was in the office. He set down the headset and tried for his best apologetic smile. "I'm sorry, Caroline."

"Don't worry about it," she said through a genial smile. "Go see whatever it is you need to see. I'll make sure everything is setup for Frankie's arrival tonight."

"I shouldn't be gone for more than a few hours." He collected his belongings, stuffing items haphazardly into his briefcase. Just as he was mere feet from the door he stopped, turned, and cast a glance at Caroline, the answer to her question suddenly pushing past Villa Montecito to be in the forefront of his mind.

"Caroline?" She drew her attention away from her phone and looked up at him expectantly. The answer was a breath of air that had been stuck in his throat for more years than necessary. "I thought she was you."

"The three of them reached a custody agreement in arbitration two weeks ago," Audra explained as she poured wine into Natalie's empty glass. "She's enrolled in a program designed for children who move around a lot. That way the curriculum is the same no matter where she is."

Natalie kept her eyes on Frankie - fast asleep and sprawled across her seat with a discarded book in her lap, glasses hanging precariously off her nose - as she sipped the chilled white wine. Audra sat at her side and slipped off her heels.

"Joe never said anything?"

"No, not a word," Natalie admitted ruefully. "What's the arrangement?"

Audra sighed into her wine glass. "Until escrow closes Celine will stay in a rental with Frankie in LA, with James getting one week a month plus alternating weekends. Joe will have day visits once a week."

Natalie cast her eyes out the window, though there was nothing to look at but darkness in the sky. They would be chasing the sunset across the country in Audra's private plane, always just shy of the last remnants of light. "What do you mean 'until escrow closes?' Is Celine moving to LA?"

"He's agreed to buy Celine a house for her, Frankie and the baby, in addition to buying a home for himself so he can stop living out of our penthouses."

The baby. Of course.
How could she have forgotten, even for a moment?

"What about Joe?"

"Once he and Frankie have a more established relationship then he will be included in the rotation. It won't be easy shuffling around to three different parents but if they stick with the schedule it should be fine. Holidays may be problematic."

Natalie shook her head. "Sounds like a mess."

"You should have heard James and Joe arguing over who would provide for Frankie financially. I'm amazed neither of them threw a punch."

Natalie could picture it. James was fiercely protective of Frankie despite the fact that he wasn't her biological father. She knew Joe regretted not being a part of Frankie's early childhood, but she wasn't clear on whether that was entirely his doing or if either James or Celine had a part in that. Not to mention the fact that apart from their daughter, the two men disliked each other immensely.

"James will pay alimony to Celine and take care of Frankie's expenses while she's with him, and Joe will cover her when she's with either him or Celine. James set up a trust for Frankie before she was born, so Joe will merely contribute to it so that she is covered for college and beyond. It's all tied into the divorce agreement," Audra added quietly.

Natalie's ears picked up at that last part but she made no move to react. "So it's all settled then?"

"Settled and filed with the county clerk. The Judgment of Divorce could be done in just a few weeks."

"Good, good," Natalie trailed off. Was it just a coincidence that as soon as she left the state the unsettled matters in James' life suddenly became settled?

Of course not.
But it felt like it.

"How is James otherwise?" She was ashamed that she had to ask, and felt guilty that she was asking Audra of all people.

"He's a goddamn tyrant."

Natalie had to swallow back her surprise to keep from audibly gasping.

"Ever since Ivy Whitcomb was fired he's been riding Graham Martin's ass, convinced that every person he puts on our account is incompetent. I wouldn't be surprised if he was secretly shopping around for a new agency. And every time he visits one of our properties I get a call from a manager asking if he's well. It used to be me they were afraid of." She chuckled sardonically.

Natalie set her wine glass down and stood suddenly. Audra's eyes followed the movement. "I have to go to the bathroom," she mumbled, taking off in the direction of the private plane's facilities before finishing the sentence.

As far as airplane restrooms went this one was a mansion. A full toilet and shower, a vanity with a cushioned chair, a sink and full amenities. She collapsed onto the seat and rested her head on her folded arms.

He's a goddamn tyrant
. The words echoed as if they were the sole contents of her head. She couldn’t help but feel responsible. She replayed one of the last conversations she’d had with James over in her mind.

'Promise me you'll come back to me.'

'I'm not going anywhere, James. We can still see each other. It just has to be slower.'

'I have no idea what that means. You'll have to help me.'

'I will. I love you.'

'I love you, too.'

In the span of their relationship he'd only ever asked her to promise two things: one, that she wouldn't return to
The Golden Palm
, and two, that she would come back to him after figuring things out. She never agreed to either, but had broken both anyway.

Natalie turned on the faucet and wet her hands with cold water before pressing them to her cheeks, forehead and neck. She switched off the water and opened the door, but turned toward the private bedroom instead of to the cabin where Frankie and Audra were. The plush queen size bed was a welcome sight, and after kicking off her shoes she crawled onto the top of it and tried to ease her mind into calm. Just when she was ready to drift off into sleep she heard a soft knock at the door. It opened without her reply, and Audra slipped inside, closing the room again behind her.

James stood at the base of the fountain a few dozen feet from the front entrance of the grand estate, the eastern sky ahead glowing in brilliant shades of dusk as the sun moved along its course to set across the Pacific at his back. Villa Montecito was more beautiful than he could have ever imagined. Solar powered courtyard lights were beginning to burn, contrasting perfectly against the emerald green leaves of flourishing palm trees. The house itself seemed to be breathing with the anticipation of the life it knew could be lived within its walls. The love that could be shared.

It was a home made perfect for blowing out birthday candles in the kitchen, Christmas mornings in front of the massive fireplace, lazy Sundays by the pool, and late mornings making love on the balcony overlooking the ocean. It was a home to grow and flourish in, to grow old and live well, to be the center of a family for generations to come.

It could still be all those things.

Next to him his real estate agent, Michael, and Michael's assistant were suppressing broad smiles of excitement. They'd taken him through every room of the house, pointing out the finer details and exquisite finishings, and in each space the life he wanted flashed before his eyes. It was an opportunity he would not let slip away.

"Are you sure I'm the first to see it?" he asked.

"Positive," Michael said, confidence in every syllable of the word. “The sellers have already moved out and had the place cleaned to spotless perfection. They know you're highly motivated. Give the word and it's yours."

No, he definitely would not let it slip away. James stared resolutely at the estate, visions of his future life still alive in full color in his mind. "Offer them asking plus closing costs if they'll agree to have everything done in thirty days."

"As you wish," Michael beamed. He reached to his assistant, who was already dutifully holding a leather-bound folio with the necessary paperwork inside. "Sign here and I'll take care of the rest, Mister Fitzgerald."

"Call Alice at my office for whatever you need to get it done."

"Absolutely, sir. I have no doubt I'll be calling to confirm their acceptance of your offer before you've returned to Los Angeles."

"Good." James took a deep breath and took in the sight of the massive home one last time. He could accomplish a lot in just thirty days.

"Are you okay?" Audra asked softly.

"Yeah. I'll be fine."

"It's not your fault, Natalie," she said as she walked to the edge of the bed. "He was a tyrant after leaving Celine, too. He'll go back to normal eventually. He always does."

Natalie didn't want to talk about James Fitzgerald. She was unsure there would ever come a time when pain didn't inevitably follow the memories or thoughts of him. She'd become skilled at stifling the part of him that lived in her heart until the pain was gone and she could resume her own life. The trick was to otherwise occupy her senses.

She sat up and scooted to the end of the bed until her feet were on the carpeted floor. Audra held her wine glass down by her hip, half full of the light golden liquid.

"I forgot my wine in the cabin," Natalie said softly.

"Would you like me to get it for you?"

Natalie touched her hand to the back of Audra's knee and grazed up across the denim-clad expanse to her backside.

"When did you know?"

"When did I know what?" Audra asked, her voice barely a whisper above the sound of the plane engines.

"That you were attracted to me?" Her free hand joined the first at Audra's backside and slid upwards, continuing the trail above the band of her tight jeans and to the warm skin beneath the cashmere sweater. "Was it the moment before you kissed me for the first time? Or the day we first met? You came to my office at Brighton wearing that gorgeous emerald green dress."

Audra's lips pursed into a smile. "That wasn't the day we first met."

Momentarily confused, Natalie's fingers paused their exploration of Audra's skin. "No?"

Audra drained the remainder of the wine then set the empty glass down on the floor before climbing onto the bed next to Natalie, one leg tucked beneath her bottom, her knee brushing against Natalie's own.

"The day our account moved from Brighton's San Francisco office to Los Angeles I was in Graham Martin's office overseeing potential account managers." She looked wistfully into the middle distance, lost in her own memory. "Ann Stable briefly interrupted our meeting to introduce Graham to a new employee in marketing. I'll never forget it. Wild curls of red hair that were barely restrained at the nape of her neck, creamy smooth skin and silvery blue eyes." Audra's eyes took in the features of Natalie's face. "And those lips." She reached out and gently swept her thumb across Natalie's bottom lip. "Graham introduced us but I think you were too swept up in the excitement of your first day to notice me."

Natalie picked up Audra's hand and held it to her cheek. "That day was a blur," she remembered with a smile. "But I do remember going into his office. I never made the connection that that was you."

"The moment I realized I was attracted to you, however," Audra continued, "was when you lifted your arms above your head and that sexy black lace dress smoothed up and over your thighs. With every breath you took that black lace went higher and higher, and I'd never seen a sexier pair of legs in my entire life. I still haven't."

Oh my god
. "You were there?" Natalie whispered hoarsely.

"I'm the one who put the blindfold on you."

Natalie's chest rose and fell in increasingly rapid succession. Audra Robertson was there that night at
The Golden Palm
. All this time and Natalie never knew.

"Why didn't you say anything to me later?"

"Do you really need to ask?"

Because of James. That had to be the only reason.

"I never planned on acting on it. Ever." Audra's thumb swept languorously across Natalie's cheek. "And then there you were in the bar at
The Jacqueline
, attempting to get drunk."

"I would have, if you hadn't stopped me."

"You're better than that, Natalie."

"So do you plan on acting on it now?" Natalie's eyes burned under Audra's penetrating gaze. "Or are we just going to pretend that that's not what either of us wants?"