Camp Alien (37 page)

“T
HIS IS INSANE,”
Keith said for, by my count, the fourth time.

“Most of Kitty's plans are,” Jerry said. “But they work out. Somehow.”

“I feel the love. Look, time's always of the essence and unless one of you has a better, foolproof way for us to get inside, my idea's the one we're going with.”

“I'd appreciate a more thorough recap myself, Missus Martini. Mostly because I have no faith that our cavalry is coming any time soon.”

“Fine, Mister White, but only to make you happy. Okay, we have to figure that the Kendroid has been monitoring what we've been doing from inside his Helicarrier Fortress. So either he didn't care that we've found and freed all the captives—which seems unlikely—or it doesn't matter to his plan.”

“His plan to turn us into androids?” Joe asked.

“No. I realized when Lizzie was looking at this as a fun field trip that I was looking at the entire situation incorrectly. I was looking at it as just what you said, Joe—that we were being taken to turn us into androids or similar.”

“Can't imagine why you'd think that,” Randy said dryly. “Since that wasn't happening to the two of us already or anything.”

“Dudes, seriously, think for a minute. The whole reason the androids work is that they're slipped in to fool people. My team was kidnapped in broad daylight. Ergo, when we come back, we can't ‘slip in' and act like things are normal.”

“Joe and Randy could have,” Abigail said thoughtfully. “Since everyone was separated, no one could say that something did or didn't happen to anyone else.”

“Exactly.”

Mahin cocked her head. “This is like when we met, isn't it? We think it's one thing going on, when another is the real goal.”

“Yes. Crystal Maurer wanted to go with me to Camp David. Why? Why would she even think I'd allow that?”

“She wasn't really there to find out if you'd agree to her demands,” White said. “She was there to see who was with you.”

“Exactly. And, you were with me, as were several others who matter to Jeff and Christopher, and that meant that they'd have not one but several hostages to discuss in terms of trade.”

“Trading you for what?” Keith asked.

“Not what, who. Trading us for Stephanie. She's incarcerated and her top two androids want her back. The Kendroid in particular. The Kendroid in very particular. He thinks he's a real person, and I think I know why he does.”

Lizzie made a face. “Gross. You think he's her boyfriend, don't you?”

“Yeah, I do. And I'd like to point out that only Lizzie made that leap with limited clues. So, everyone else needs to feel ashamed. Anyway, he's got the best hostages he could have in order to get Stephanie released. And we can't reach Jeff and the others, meaning that they don't
know
that we're actually all free.”

“And your mother and Jeff are the ones who would approve the release,” Jerry said.

“Meaning they'll be making a deal,” Walker said, voice tight. “Because they'll be willing to trade her for you.”

“Especially because they don't know what she's got going on here like we do,” Hughes added. “Let's get this rolling.”

“Shouldn't we go for help?” Lucas asked, indicating himself and the other three Field agents.

“No, Luke, because we're probably going to need your help inside the helicarrier. You and Marc were in there and Dan and Josh examined it.” On cue, Lucas winced. As if he
was going to escape the Nickname Game while I was rolling? “We're going to need you guys there. Plus, androids are hella strong—we need the A-C muscles.”

“Should all of us really give ourselves up, though?” Mahin asked nervously. “He could just blast us.”

“We're useless to him dead. He needs us as hostages to trade.”

“No, he said he needed you and Uncle Richard to turn into androids,” Abigail said. “The rest of us are along to make you cooperate.”

“That was so Multiplan Man's Army Plan ago, Abby. He did want us for that. We've destroyed all his backup. Ergo, he can't trade android versions of me and Richard back for Stephanie. Trust me, the Kendroid has switched to the simple hostage exchange plan.”

“Getting fancy hasn't worked for him,” Lizzie said.

“Exactly. So, let's do what Matt said and get Mission: Be Re-Kidnapped rolling.”

The others nodded in agreement, even Keith. We headed off again at a walking pace. No reason to rush, in part because that might cause the Kendroid to think we were attacking, when I wanted him to think we were surrendering or similar. The sun was starting to think about setting, meaning we'd been gone for hours now.

“I think I saw the limo go back the correct way,” Lizzie said.

“Good.” Waited for laser fire or whatever. None. Breathed a small sigh of relief. Gave it a shot to see if my phone would turn back on. It did and I had plenty of battery left. Decided that Algar had His Mysterious Ways and I wasn't going to argue with them. Put my earbuds in, put my music on low, and slid my phone into my jeans pocket. John Mayer's “Bold As Love” came on. Took this to mean that Algar approved my plan.

Checked my purse to see if I had any Poofs on Board. I was quite Poofless. “So, did your Poofs not stay with you guys for some reason?” I asked the flyboys.

“They disappeared right before we were captured,” Jerry said. “I know because Flyer sort of said goodbye.”

“Like forever goodbye?”

Jerry shook his head. “No,” Hughes said. “I mean, we can't talk to the Poofs like you do, but they get their points
across. They took off, I think, because they weren't sure they could get out of the helicarrier. At least that was the impression Razzle gave me.”

“Dazzle did the same with me, too,” Walker said.

Joe and Randy nodded. “Foo seemed stressed when it left me,” Joe said.

“Yeah, Fighter didn't seem happy to go,” Randy added. “But I haven't seen any Poofs, mine or anyone else's, since we were taken.”

“Yeah, if Camilla and the princesses have Poofs, they weren't in evidence,” Jerry said.

Rahmi and Rhee both had Poofs. Had no idea if Camilla did or not, but it wouldn't hurt to find out.

One way or the other, though, this was good information but it boded for the Poofs, since they weren't around and if they'd tried to help the Peregrines, Camilla, and/or the princesses, that meant they were trapped on the helicarrier just like all those others. And we had proof that there were things the Poofs couldn't get out of—the Poof Traps that had let Annette Dier kill Fuzzball during Operation Infiltration were Evil Exhibit A.

Thinking about how she'd murdered not only the Poof but the person said Poof had been attached to—Michael Gower—made me angry. This was good, because I had a feeling I was going to need rage, and I was having trouble getting and staying enraged around the Kendroid and this location. Had no idea if it was because I was creeped out, if there was something dampening talents or emotions or whatever like our cell phones and all the empaths' talents, or if it was simply that I kind of felt sorry for him.

Not that I was willing to give the Kendroid a lot of slack, but he reminded me a lot of The Clarence Clone—simple and innocent. Though the Kendroid was far more dangerous to us than TCC had ever been.

“Is that it?” Mahin pointed to a large building on our left.

“Nope.” Led the others off the main street onto the circular drive that led to this building's official entrance. Forest Haven seemed to use these grandiose drives to indicate their top places. Or where there were the most haunts and ownerless shoes. Wasn't in the mood to place a bet, honestly.

We reached the entrance as “Knock Knock” by the
Hives came on my airwaves. Nice to see Algar keeping his sense of humor. “Oh,” Abigail said. “Look at the shadows.”

The sun was low behind the building, and while the invisibility or cloaking or whatever on the helicarrier was good, it wasn't quite good enough. The shadows weren't right for a building. Well, not for just a building.

“Unreal, it's really on the roof,” Lizzie said.

“I love how no one believed me until now. There's a road that's just as great as all the others we've seen that encircles this place—it connects to Center in two places, not counting the two for this drive. So, if we get separated for some reason, just get to a road and follow it and it'll take you back. Once you hit Center go left to get back to the main haunted building. If you go right you hit some nice fencing with barbed wire.”

“We shouldn't separate,” Keith said sternly. “Especially once inside.”

“No duh, which is why I said ‘if.' Because it helps to have contingency plans.”

“It's a good location to hide the helicarrier,” Adriana said, presumably to stop our bickering. “And it allows the aircraft to take off without causing damage to the ground.”

“I'd be a lot more worried about it destroying this ancient building than damaging the ground,” Keith said, clearly determined to do his best to keep the bickering going.

“Keith has a good point,” White said. “Every building we've examined so far has been ready to collapse. We need to exercise caution—even hyperspeed won't help us if the floors fall out from under us.”

“Thanks for that, Mister Sunshine.”

“What do you think crushed the trees, then?” Mahin asked. “Could there be more invisible equipment?”

“They could have played around with our jets,” Jerry said. “If they landed one in the area we're talking about, it could have taken out trees.”

“Not without damage to the jet,” Joe said darkly.

“Dudes, damage to your pretty planes is, currently, the least of our worries.” Well, it was the least of mine, since now it was time to figure out how to get in. And I had no really clear idea.

However, showing weakness and indecision wasn't a
good leader trait. “Up From Under” by the Wallflowers came on. Clearly Algar felt I needed the none-too-subtle hint.

“Let's go in. As Richard said, we need to move quickly and carefully. We're heading for the roof and I have no idea which way to go once we're inside.”

“Ah,” White said. “So, routine.”

A
S PER USUAL,
there was a big No Trespassing sign on the doors, which we ignored. We weren't linked up yet, but we ensured every human was close to an A-C. Kept Lizzie right next to me as we stepped gingerly over the threshold.

“Yay, more shoes,” she said as our eyes adjusted and Adriana and I pulled out the flashlights. Heard Keith and Randy muttering about ghosts. Actively chose to ignore them.

“Yeah, I'm thrilled.” The shoes were in the usual scattered piles. Nothing like the top floor of Stephanie's Secret Lab, but definitely in keeping with the Myriad Forsaken Shoes Theme the rest of this place kept to.

Daniel and Joshua took point, while Marcus and Lucas brought up the rear. This building had clearly been dorms and classrooms and such. It looked more modern, to use the term loosely. And it had the usual horrors that we'd seen elsewhere in full evidence—abandoned everything, crap everywhere, enough dust to choke a herd of elephants if the smell of decay didn't get them first, prevalent and unrelenting signs of horrific abuse, and shoes, shoes, shoes.

“Did they make shoes here or something?” Keith asked quietly. “Could that be why the ghosts pile them up all over?”

“I believe it indicates that the residents were not allowed to wear footwear as often as they might have wanted,” Adriana said carefully.

“Try to ignore the shoes,” I said in a tone I hoped sounded authoritarian. “Keith, Randy, and Joe, I mean you
guys especially. They won't go away if you ignore them, but paying attention to them isn't in your best interests.” Considered our options. “I think I'm going to have us break my ‘stick together' rule already. Dan and Josh, are you guys feeling up to doing a quick run through the building? Be honest.”

“I am,” Joshua said.

“I as well.” Daniel looked around. “Can we take one of the flashlights?”

“Sure.” Handed him mine and they zipped off. They were back quickly, but not as quickly as I was used to. “Wait In the Dark” by Memory Tapes came and went and “I Have Waited So Long” by Foreigner started before they were back. “Wow, for A-Cs that took forever. Are you guys really okay?”

“Yes,” Daniel said as he handed the flashlight back to me. “It's just as dangerous in here as Former Pontifex White said it would be.”

“We found a variety of options to get upstairs,” Joshua shared. “We weren't sure if you wanted us to test them or if you wanted us to go as a group. It could be a lot of stairs—this is a two story building.”

“Three stories in some places.” Looked at White. “Your thoughts?”

“We go as a group,” he said firmly.

Since we knew where we were going now, we linked up and all enjoyed the benefits of hyperspeed. Happily, the Hyperspeed Dramamine that Tito had created way back when was continuously being improved.

Originally every human had had to take a dose a day, then a dose a week. But now it was a dose a month, so the flyboys were still okay with the hyperspeed. Mahin took it just in case, Adriana regularly took the same dose as all the other humans who worked with us, and Siler had given some to Lizzie the moment we'd all gotten back together at the Embassy after Operation Epidemic ended.

Keith, however, wasn't dosed up. From personal experience, as long as we didn't go too fast—which we couldn't in this building—the effects of hyperspeed would only hit once we stopped.

Unfortunately for Keith, we were having to stop a lot, since Daniel and Joshua hadn't been kidding—there were a
lot of stairwells, sensible in a building this size. Some were impassable, some took us to the top but were without roof access, some we thought might have roof access but were blocked by too much stuff we didn't want to move, even though I was pretty sure I had more evidence gloves in my purse.

We hit all of the likely options, while I enjoyed the vocal stylings of Iggy & the Stooges singing “Search and Destroy” courtesy of the Algar Channel, and found we couldn't get outside. My music changed to “Look Sharp!” by Joe Jackson as we reached the last impassable stairwell.

“Let's double-check the more passable ones and look for something you guys might have missed,” I said as Keith dry-heaved, having tossed all his cookies several stairwells earlier. Which was okay, because he wasn't adding anything different to the overall mix of this place, including smell.

Only a few people with me sighed, but we headed off again, me looking intently for clues in the dark, the murk, the mess, and the footwear. Was rewarded for this diligence—spotted a faded sign over a door that said Administration.

Headed us through this door, which led to an office that, in turn, led to a short hall that had three doors on either side and one door at the end. The door at the end was entitled Maintenance. Well, it was if I ignored all the graffiti that indicated it was the entrance to Hell and similar, which I actively chose to.

“We searched here,” Daniel said.

“Yeah, well we're going to search again. At human speeds.”

We left Keith heaving into a wastebasket that was somehow still here and, for this place, in decent shape.

The six office doors led to a variety of offices that looked medical in nature, but could easily have been secretarial. There was so much random junk in all of them that I refused to try to guess. The Maintenance Portal to Hell, however, was more promising, since it had stairs. That went down.

“Did you guys check these?”

“No,” Joshua replied. “Because we wanted to go up, not down.”

“You guys really don't understand how humans think, do
you? Get Keith—we're heading down and I don't want to leave anyone behind to miss whatever horrors we're heading into.”

Keith was retrieved, and we started down. In this case, I insisted on going first. Not because I was so very brave or anything, but because that was my job as the leader. And also because my music changed to “Where It's At” by Beck, and I had a feeling we were close to what we wanted to find.

The stairs were concrete, and the walls weren't all that bad. For Forest Haven, this was a pretty good descent. I didn't race down, but we were moving faster than we'd been able to anywhere else in here.

The one flight of stairs led to the basement, which had boilers, laundry equipment, and other maintenance-type stuff that made sense to be here. If this place was really Hell, then Hell was the only place in Forest Haven that made sense. And, best of all, there were no shoes in evidence. I perked up considerably.

I also found what we really wanted—another stairwell, going up. This one, like the one we'd taken to get down to the basement, was concrete and not all that bad. It also had four landings and went up, by my count, three stories.

Reached a door at the top landing. Tried to open it but it was stuck. Stepped aside and allowed Daniel to give it a go. It didn't budge. He and Joshua both slammed their shoulders against it and got it to give.

They couldn't get the door opened all the way, but got it open far enough that we could all get through, though Keith had to really squeeze himself to manage it.

“Everyone be careful, the taller guys especially, because we don't want anyone to get knocked out by the huge hunk of metal we can't see.”

“Okay, we're up on the roof,” Joe said. “And I can tell, by the way we're not really seeing all the sun we should be, that there's something above us.”

Keith put his hand up slowly until his arm was extended as far as it could go. “I can just feel it. My fingertips are touching something that feels like metal.”

“Hand down,” Jerry said. “Just in case.” Keith nodded and did as ordered. So he could be taught.

“So, we're here,” Randy said. “Now what? Do we knock?”

“We could try to get in,” Walker said, sounding like this wasn't his preferred plan in any way.

“No, it's too dangerous,” Hughes replied. “We don't know what security is on this thing, but we're safer if we assume a lot.”

“I thought you had a plan,” Keith said to me. He sounded expectant, not snide. Which was a pity, in that sense, since I'd been a lot more focused in getting us up here than in formulating what I'd do once we were.

Thanks to Keith's comment, everyone was now looking at me just as expectantly as he was. Heaved a sigh. It was not time to say I had nothing sane planned. No, it was, as always, time to go with what worked. In other words, it was time to go with the crazy.

And, apparently, Algar approved. Because my music changed to Pete Townsend's “Let My Love Open the Door.” It was time to roll Mission: Trojan Horsey.