Facing the World (8 page)

He was walking home along the rather overgrown path when he was suddenly pushed from behind. He shouted in alarm as he fell heavily on to his face. He listened but there wasn’t a sound apart from his sobs. He stood up and, glancing back into the darkness, hurried towards home. Hearing someone approaching, he slid into the hedge at the side of the path and was relieved to see the familiar figure of Eric.

‘Someone pushed me over,’ Jimmy said, brave now he wasn’t alone.

‘I saw someone running across the field. I couldn’t see who it was, could you?’

‘Pushed from behind, I was! I didn’t see a thing!’

‘Come on, boy, I’ll walk back with you. I was on my way to see a farmer beyond Frog Moor – he’s promised me a couple of rabbits.’

‘Live ones?’ Jimmy said hopefully.

‘No, for the pot, I’m afraid.’

‘Just as well. Dad wouldn’t let me keep them.’

At the edge of the wood, David Gorse was standing as though waiting for them to appear. ‘Someone ran out of the wood a while ago and almost knocked me down.’

‘And me,’ Jimmy said proudly.

‘The thing is, I’m sure it was Rhys Martin. I wonder why he’s hiding in the woods.’

‘No, it definitely wasn’t Rhys,’ Eric said firmly. ‘I saw him too and he wasn’t tall enough. More your height. Now, come on, young Jimmy, and get yourself home – it’s almost morning.’

‘It was Rhys,’ David insisted.

‘No, it was not. The height was wrong and also the way he ran. Rhys was an athlete and moved like a well-oiled machine. The man who pushed Jimmy ran as though he had had a rat up his trousers!’ Jimmy laughed.

Sally had gone to the sale and bought a few small items of furniture and one large one. An armchair which no one wanted had been sold at a very low price and she had been unable to resist. Now, with no
home, where could she keep it all? Some of the smaller items were found a space in what Valmai called, her ‘mongrel of a shed’, with its oddly uneven walls and the unsightly extension at the back. There was no access to the extension from inside; it was simply a cupboard added on, distorting the shape ever more than before. A bunion, Gwilym called it, but he was glad of it as it gave him places to store things, giving him more space inside the workshop. He gave no explanation for his need for extra room. Valmai didn’t ask.

Sally had failed to find a suitable place to live and in desperation she accepted a room in the boarding house where Eric lived. It was on the ground floor and consisted of a single room with use of the kitchen and bathroom, As the other two ground floor rooms were unoccupied for the moment, she at least had sole use of these, for which she was grateful.

She sent a message to Rhys in one of the usual brown envelopes and began to move her few possessions. Jimmy was passing on his way home from the shops, with a loaf of bread of which he had nibbled the corner, and he saw her struggling with a small table. Seeing her
difficulties
, he ran to tell Rick, who was clearing a small area of the garden to plant some rose bushes. Together they went to help.

The following day, when she arrived with her daughter in a pushchair and a few carrier bags holding the last of her food store, Rick and Jimmy were sitting on the steps.

‘Eric’s lit a fire,’ Jimmy reported. ‘And we’ve got a picnic, made by my mam and Mrs Martin. Come on,’ he encouraged, reached for Sadie’s hand, ‘I’m starvin’.’

Seeing a bright fire helped lessen the shabbiness of the room and she determined to get more paint and brighten the walls as soon as she could. They ate the food Valmai and Netta had sent and for a while the room was cheerful and she felt an optimism she had lost. It didn’t last.

It was when they had all gone, leaving her to sort out the best places for her own things, that the loneliness hit her. In the silence, with Sadie asleep in her cot and the door closed, she was completely on her own, locked away from a disapproving world. That it had been her own choice didn’t help. She stared at the back of the door where marks showed where a dartboard had been hung and well used, and she longed for Rhys to walk through it. His exams were
over, the results learnt, so why hadn’t he said something about when he was coming to join them? What about a job? Was that what he was waiting for? A place in a school in Bristol maybe. Was that why he hadn’t told her? Afraid she wouldn’t want to move from Tre Melin?

She wrote another letter with a secret message only he could
interpret
– a silly idea to prevent anyone reading it should the letter be opened by someone other than Rhys. The secret messages that had been such fun were now nothing more than a stupid and childish game. After all these years and months, it was time to end it and face the world. If there had been a fear of suspicion, it must surely have faded. With a second child on the way he had to realize she was more important than an unconfirmed threat. She knew that having to move into this terrible place was the reason for her resentment, although she doubted if she would have been tolerant for much longer, even if she’d stayed with Mrs Falconer.

Tearing up the letter she wrote another, this time in plain words telling of her pregnancy and the awful room. She placed it on the table ready to post the following day. A visit to the bank worried her. She suddenly realized that if Rhys decided not to return to her, she would have difficulty affording a decent place to live.

Valmai called to see the room and she was saddened to think that her son had reduced this lovely young woman to such a situation. She tried again to persuade Sally to move in with her and Gwilym but Sally refused.

With a growing feeling of unease, Sally didn’t want to look too settled, too comfortable, when Rhys saw her. If he saw her in this awful place, surely he’d come home? Seeing her and Sadie
comfortable
and cared for, he’d have an excuse to delay his return. Obviously he was in no hurry, she thought sadly.

Valmai frequently brought soups and stews and a few cakes and, if Sally was out, she’d leave them with Eric, or near her door. For these Sally was grateful. The kitchen she was able to use didn’t entice her to want to cook. Mrs Falconer also called and brought flowers, which were also welcome, adding a little cheer to the dull room.

Eric was walking along the streets, killing time before going home and locking himself in his room with only a radio for company, when he saw a pile of rubbish put out for the refuse collectors. There was a
large planter there, which, if it was scrubbed, would make an
attractive
addition to Rick and Amy’s garden. He knocked on the door and politely asked if he could take it. Permission given, he struggled with it along Mill Street as darkness was falling. Unfortunately he was seen by Milly Sewell, who immediately called the police.

Eric knocked on the door of Waterstones’ house as he saw a light there and gave the planter to Rick. Amy stood behind him, frowning.

‘It’s all right, I know it needs a scrub and I’ll do it for you tomorrow,’ Eric promised, as Rick rubbed his hands over the sculpted surface in obvious pleasure. Before Eric had left, PC Harvey arrived and asked where he had bought it.

‘Thrown out for the rubbish, it was,’ Eric said.

Amy screamed and insisted he took it away. ‘Bringing stolen goods to my house! How dare you?’ she shouted.

Calmly, Eric gave the name and address of the place where he had found it and went with the constable to interview the woman, who agreed with Eric’s story.

‘Please, will you go and tell Amy and Rick that it wasn’t stolen?’ he asked. ‘Amy’s all right but she’s easily convinced I’m either a dirty tramp or a criminal.’ Laughing, the constable agreed.

Eric was slowly repairing the fence in Valmai and Gwilym’s garden. He used some of the remnants of the old shed and he had been given some wood left from the summer house Amy had had built in the garden of the Waterstones’ house. Rick confided to Eric that he would like to give him the whole thing! The garden had been planned down to the last inch and Amy had only accepted the rosebed because Rick had craftily told her they were his gift to her.

Eric was with Gwilym one day when Netta called in.

‘You’ll never guess,’ she said, when Valmai had joined them. ‘My Walter has actually got a job! Never thought it would happen, did you? Since the factory closed down he’s refused everything that’s been offered. But yesterday he was offered a job and accepted. What d’you think of that, eh?’

In answer to a barrage of questions, she told them that a large house had been sold and someone was needed to decorate it. ‘Right through, mind, every room. It’ll keep him busy for months, and there’s no one living there, so he won’t feel he’s clock watching.’ 

They all cheered and hoped the work wouldn’t tire him too much, a comment Netta took literally, unaware of the grins passing between them. They all knew how enthusiastic Walter was and counted his proposed employment in days rather than months.

Each day, after posting the now daily letters to Rhys, Sally watched for the postman. A week passed during which she cleaned and painted the overcrowded room, then another. She shouldn’t have started to improve it; the worse it looked the more chance of Rhys facing up to his promise. His time was up and now it was her turn. She was still determined not to complain. The decision had to come from him.

Seeing the round pebble halfway up the steps a couple of weeks later, at the beginning of October, her heart leaped. Rhys was here! He’d received her letters and was coming to put everything right at last and she’d see him in a few hours.

She settled Sadie into her cot, unlocked the door and waited. It was past eleven o’clock when he came and at once she welcomed him lovingly. He stepped back and stared at her.

‘You’re pregnant! Why didn’t you tell me?’ he asked. His reaction was far from what she had hoped. She sat down and asked him why he hadn’t replied to her letters.

‘I haven’t been to the café for a while. I didn’t think you’d write so soon after seeing me. I – I didn’t think you’d have news like this.’

‘I didn’t think I’d be writing such news in a letter posted to a café in Bristol after more than two years have passed. What’s happening, Rhys? Tell me.’

‘I’m thrilled, really, I couldn’t be more excited, love, but it’s making things a little bit awkward.’

‘In what way?’ she asked, her heart thumping with anxiety. ‘Your two years are over, and you must have a place in a school. Everything you wanted. Now we can be together at last and the critics can find someone else to fuel their gossip.’

‘I haven’t told you this – I’ve been trying to find a way around it, but I need another year.’

‘Another year?’

‘A school year. Once I have taught for a year I’m a fully qualified teacher and – it’s only until next July,’ he added. ‘The school year, not twelve months.’

‘Our baby will be born in January.’ She looked around the dreary room. ‘Can you really want your daughter or son to be born here?’

‘Well, no, of course not, and that’s why I’ve arranged something much better for you.’

‘We’re coming to Bristol?’ Hope surged then fell again as he shook his head. ‘I want you to move in with Mam and Dad.’

‘I’ve already been asked and I refused. We agreed to deal with this whole thing ourselves.’

‘But we didn’t plan on two children.’ His voice was sharp and she gasped with shock. ‘You must see that it changes everything.’ He spoke again in that harsh, unrecognized voice, his eyes avoiding meeting hers.

‘You don’t want this baby.’

‘Of course I do. But it’s so badly timed.’

‘I can hardly ask it to wait until you’re ready, can I?’

‘Aren’t there ways of – you know.’

‘An abortion? It’s far too late, and besides, at the moment, Rhys, I think I want this baby more than I want you.’

The rest of his brief visit was strained. Neither of them knew what to say. They were different sides of a very high fence. 

WHEN RHYS WAS
leaving, Sally didn’t go with him to the door and wait for that final kiss; she sat and stared at the closing door of her shabby room and wondered if she would ever feel again the love they had shared for so long. Her loyalty had been misplaced. He wasn’t the strong partner she had thought him. He would have asked her to abandon this child if it hadn’t been too late and he hadn’t even attempted to hide his disappointment.

She heard Sadie rouse and stretch in her sleep and she stood up and tucked the covers around her more securely, bending to kiss the child’s head. She was on her own with Sadie and the new baby and for their sakes she had to accept help. Tomorrow she would talk to Valmai and Gwilym. Until things became clearer, she would stay with them and the new baby would be born into a comfortable home. After that, well, she still had enough of the money left by her parents to make a start somewhere else.

Into the stunned silence, Rhys had explained that he would be working as many hours as he could and would manage with only a little help just to start. He’d have to find fresh accommodation and books, paper and art materials. Once he’d acquired all those, he’d cope. ‘Just this final hurdle,’ he told her, ‘and I’ll be back and
everything
will be all right. For the four of us,’ he added.

Sally had hardly heard a word. All she could think of was that she, Sadie and this new baby weren’t worth changing his plans for. Weren’t important enough. She doubted if they were even included in his future plans. Once he’d achieved his aim, he might disappear from their lives completely.

Dawn broke on a dark, gloomy morning before she slept. Her
mind was going round and round, confused thoughts of a magical solution, tangling with the harsh reality, touching on vague plans and the dream of Rhys coming back and promising to stay, vying with the more likely outcome of Rhys staying with the life he’d been living for more than two years, with strangers, people she would never know. The confusion of hopes and dismay was still with her when Sadie woke her, calling, ‘Mummy? Mummy?’

That’s what I am, she thought. First and last I am Sadie’s mummy. Sadie and the new baby, they are my life. Everything else comes a poor second.

Valmai welcomed her and Sadie with delight, which increased as Sally asked if she and Sadie might move in, just for a while, until the baby was born and she had found them all a proper home. She opened the door wide and called, ‘Gwilym? Look who’s here! And they’re coming to stay!’

Sally looked towards the shed and saw, through the window, the head of Gwilym, and a hand waving in welcome.

‘Making a surprise present, he is,’ Valmai explained. ‘Won’t let me see it. Not that I mind. I’m so relieved to have him showing an interest in the tools again. He can keep as many secrets as he likes.’

Not as big as the secrets kept by your son, Sally thought bitterly.

‘I’ll just put the kettle on and make some tea then we’ll go up to see him. He won’t come down while there’s anyone here,’ she added quietly. ‘I still can’t persuade him to be seen in that chair of his. Stubborn, he is. I tell him he’s got to face the world sometime but will he listen?’

‘Perhaps I’m the one to persuade him. Look at me, a second child and no sign of a husband. There’s gossip in plenty and at least the talk about him will be kindly. Mrs Sewell never misses a chance to hint that I’m not suitable company for decent people.’

‘Leave Milly Sewell to me. I’ll put her straight.’

‘No, please. Rhys doesn’t want anyone to know. Not yet.’ She was still held by unreasonable support for Rhys, even though he’d treated her so badly.

‘I thought he’d finished his two years and was coming home?’

‘So did I,’ Sally murmured.

‘Can you tell me what’s happened?’

‘Everything is too confused at the moment.’ 

‘When you’re ready to talk, I’m here. Now let’s get this tea and Gwilym can show you your surprise.’

When she saw the beautifully carved baby cradle Gwilym had made, Sally burst into tears.

Stories spread easily in the houses around Mill Road and School Lane and David heard of Sally’s intention to move in with Rhys’s parents before a day had passed. Would Rhys call on Sally before the move? He kept watch on the back of the house for three nights, patiently scanning the porch for movement. His eyes were well accustomed to the night and he knew that the appearance of Rhys and the opening of the door would not be missed. He sat against a tree, almost invisible to the casual glance, hooded by an old ex-army coat against the chill. On his knees there was a camera. In his eyes there was excitement.

Valmai had proudly shown Sally the room she had prepared for her and Sadie. It had quickly been made, ready for them to move out of the awful boarding house the following weekend. She had written a brief note to tell Rhys what was happening and hearing the letter, formal and without any of the usual loving messages, dropping into the post-box, was like saying goodbye.

On her last evening she saw the round pebble was in the middle of the porch and her heart dropped. What could she say to him? The room was cluttered with boxes filled with her possessions and only Sadie’s cot was clear of muddle. The little girl was sleeping soundly and Sally had almost decided not to answer Rhys’s knock, but when the second gentle tap came she rose, took a deep breath and opened the door.

As Rhys stepped forward, the light shining out from the open door, someone called and he turned. At that moment there was the flash and a brief whirring sound, followed by a repeat.

‘Someone took my photograph!’ he said angrily. He left Sally and ran in the direction of the sound. Footsteps ahead of him led him across the road through fields towards the mill. He stopped before reaching the building and listened but there wasn’t a sound apart from the peaceful murmur of the stream, and he turned back.

He was cautious as he approached the shabby boarding house and
when he eventually reached the door it was locked. This time, Sally didn’t answer his call.

The following day, stories went around the houses of a series of burglaries. Most of the pieces stolen were small, easily transported china and silver items. In three cases money was taken and this amounted in total to ninety-six pounds. When the police called on Valmai and Gwilym, they were told there was evidence that Rhys had been in the area on the night the crimes took place.

Sally was interviewed and she could tell them more or less honestly that she hadn’t spoken to Rhys that night. Less truthfully, she told them she hadn’t seen him since he had run away more than two years before.

‘Yes, he disappeared at the time of previous robberies, didn’t he?’

‘A coincidence,’ she said at once. She knew the photograph, which was probably the evidence to which they referred, had been a trick. Rhys had let her down, treated her like an idiot, but she couldn’t believe he was a thief. Or could she? a small voice in her heart
questioned
. How well did she really know him? The photograph might have been a trick but perhaps the camera had been held by a victim of one of the robberies and not David Gorse, who had been her instant suspicion. Rhys had never fully explained why he had run away when the police had wanted to speak to him before and he wasn’t here to answer their questions now.

Whether they believed her or not didn’t matter. Guilty or innocent, he was out of her life. Once she had given birth and found herself a proper place to stay, she would say goodbye to Valmai and Gwilym too, much as she appreciated their kindness. She had been used and lied to, and made to look a fool. Enough of all that; she was on her own and she knew she’d cope.

The police knocked on doors asking questions and at each house they asked whether anyone had seen Rhys Martin. Walter Prosser was most disparaging, referring to Rhys as a dishonest and
dishonourable
man. ‘Everyone knows he got that poor girl into trouble then ran out on her,’ he said.

‘Working, are you, Mr Prosser?’ the police officer asked casually as he was leaving. ‘No, but the wife is and I’m no thief! I was
determined
to redecorate that big house but I had to give up, didn’t I? It’s
my back – suffered with it for years – but at least I try, not like some.’

‘Admirable, you are,’ he was told, the sarcasm wasted on him.

At Valmai and Gwilym’s house they stayed a very long time, repeating their questions in different words, approaching their queries from different angles, trying to trick them into making a mistake. Both were upset at the disappearance of their son and the police finally left, promising to call again if they had more questions.

Constable Harvey called later and said, ‘If there’s anything you want to tell me, remember I’ll help in any way I can. Rhys and I were at school together. I won’t find it easy to believe him guilty of these robberies.’

Gwilym thanked him.

‘Why did he disappear if he was innocent?’ Constable Harvey asked. ‘Does someone hold some kind of evidence against him? Have you any idea what it can be?’

‘None,’ Valmai said. ‘D’you think we wouldn’t say if we knew?’ The policeman waited, staring at them both for a long moment, then went on his way. If they were lying, they were very convincing.

The enquiries went on and the police officers called several times more but there didn’t appear to be any progress in the case.

Amy and Rick were washing windows when Amy saw Eric walking past the house. She looked at Rick, who nodded encouragingly. ‘Would you like to come in for a cup of tea?’ she called in her rather prim voice and Eric turned and looked at her in surprise. Rick waved, beckoning him in.

Eric walked towards them, eyeing Amy nervously. She wasn’t going to tell him off again, was she?

‘I owe you an apology,’ Amy said, reaching for Rick’s arm. ‘Bringing that lovely planter was a very kind thought. I’m very sorry I – um – misunderstood.’

Eric smiled and shook his head. ‘You weren’t to know, but I can assure you that I never steal. Never take anything that isn’t mine or kindly offered to me.’

‘I won’t make that mistake again. I really am sorry, Mr Thomas.’

‘Eric will do.’

‘Right then. Now, a cup of tea and one of Mummy’s scones?’ 

As Amy was making tea, Eric began scrubbing the planter and he stayed talking to them for a while after the scones were demolished. He and Rick finished cleaning the pot while Amy was busy inside the house.

‘Ever been married, Eric?’ Rick asked as they rubbed at the pot, revealing its elegant design.

‘Oh, yes. I have a daughter.’ He took out a rather battered
photograph
of a girl aged about twelve. ‘Julia she’s called but I haven’t seen her for years. She’ll be twenty-four at Christmas.’

‘What happened?’

‘My wife took her away, you see. She’d got herself in a spot of bother. Debts she couldn’t clear. She liked pretty things, see, and loved wandering around the shops.’

‘She left you with the debts?’ Rick asked softly.

‘I’d sold the house and had just managed to clear the last one, although it meant I had to sell the last of my possessions, then the factory closed. I was left with no money, a small pension and no home.’

Afraid to ask more Rick said, ‘Closing that factory ruined quite a few lives, didn’t it? Walter hasn’t worked since, or David. Several families had to move away in the search for employment.’

‘Walter didn’t miss a day when the factory was there, but once he was made redundant he quickly gave up looking for something similar, and was afraid of trying something new, so he settled into the bad-tempered misery he now is. He and Netta are always quarrelling.’

‘And he’s making young Jimmy’s life a misery.’

‘Netta worked in the factory too, in the wages office, and she got a job straight away. Pity, he might have made more effort if she hadn’t.’

Rick grinned. ‘Mind, he does have a bad back!’

‘You learn quick. You haven’t been here long but you’ve got most of us sussed!’

‘He gave up on the decorating job. Nervous exhaustion, he told me. The job was too big, too daunting, for someone with his
sensibilities
.’

‘Aw. Poor dab!’

Rhys stayed away from his usual haunts, aware that the photograph would be clear enough for him to be recognized. He searched the newspapers waiting with dread for the rest of it to come out. David had his fingerprints on stolen property and this might be the chance he’d been waiting for to hand them to the police. Thankfully, not even Sally knew exactly where he could be found and even though they had parted on bad terms, due to his shock and stupidity, she wouldn’t help them find him. Still, better to change his address, just in case.

David surprised Sally by becoming a regular visitor to the Martins’ house. He usually stayed in the shed with Gwilym, and according to Gwilym he was helping with ideas as well as some of the stages of the models being made. He also brought gifts of flowers to Valmai, and sweets and an occasional toy for Sadie.

Although Sally had never been deeply fond of the man, she had been going out with him occasionally before Rhys began to show an interest and now she wondered if Rhys’s attraction to her had been nothing more on his part than stupid revenge, due to David’s interest. It was so easy, she mused, to dislike someone having heard one side of a story. The person whose story you hear first is usually the one you believe. Rhys’s dislike of David Gorse had coloured her opinion of him, she realized that. Recently she had seen more of David and found him increasingly easy to talk to and he never once mentioned his stupid feud with Rhys that had begun at school.

From what she had gathered from Rhys, it had been little more than childish rivalry. David had copied some of Rhys’s work then told the teacher the reverse was true and Rhys had been punished for cheating. That deliberate set-up had been an angry response from David because Rhys had spoilt one of his drawings and, from such trivial beginnings, the dislike had grown.