Falling for the Other Brother (3 page)

“Ah! No wonder you were so worried when I said I didn’t come here often.”

Rhonnie blushed. “Guilty. I’m glad you like it. And we do have some really healthy things on the menu.” She waved a fork at Erica’s salad. “But if there’s something in particular you’d like to see, I can try to get it on the menu for you.”

Trevor cocked his head. “That’s very nice of you. Thank you. And really, a few more high protein, low carb options could only be a win-win in this city with so many body conscious people.”

They talked for a while longer. Between the two gregarious people talking now about food and diet, Erica just listened while she sipped at her drink. Trevor was a lot of fun to be around and very easy on the eye, and she was reluctant for the surprise lunch date to end.

Eventually Trevor set his napkin to the side of his plate and stood. He pulled out his wallet and tossed down a twenty. “I have to get going, ladies. Rhonnie”—he grasped her hand—“good luck with the rest of your pregnancy.” Then he turned to Erica and his smile increased in wattage. Feeling a bit foolish for her lack of participation in the conversation, she prepared to say goodbye.

Instead, Trevor surprised the life out of her by inviting her to dinner the following night.

* * * *

Now, five months later, they were dating exclusively and had keys to one another’s condo. The sex was amazing, the conversation flowed, and their relationship didn’t seem to suffer during each of their frequent absences for work. In fact, Trevor was pretty much perfect in her mind. Except for one major detail.

He laughed at the idea of ever wanting to have kids.

And her biological clock was more like Big Ben right now.

Was it selfish to want to break up with the perfect guy just so she could—what?—search randomly for Mr Ready-to-be-a-Dad?

Of all the crappy timing
…

“Tick-tock,” she muttered, tears pricking her throat.

Chapter Three

Erica managed to ignore Trevor’s ringtone until it went to voicemail yet again, trying unsuccessfully to tune it out by reviewing her notes for the voiceover she was about to record.

You are such a coward.

She was, and she knew it. But for the life of her, she couldn’t bring herself to begin the
we’re-in-different-places
conversation with Trevor, even though she’d rehearsed it at least a hundred times.

Every time Trevor went out of town on a shoot or publicity gig, she told herself she would break it off as soon as he got home. And every time he returned, she saw that brilliant, familiar smile directed at her and wimped out.

Coming up on six months of dating, she could feel herself getting in deeper and deeper. In fact, without the obstacle of her obsession with having a child and his adamant—yet honest, she grudgingly admitted—refusal to go there, she might have even been considering popping the question to him at this point. They were obviously well-matched despite the age difference, and there was love between them. Not the passionate, dramatic love of cinema, but a steady, pleasing, and somehow more
real
feeling love than she had ever imagined.

Waging an inner war and losing to her curiosity, Erica finally caved and listened to the two-day series of voicemails from Trevor.

“Hi babe. Been a long day here, and no cell reception where we were, so finally have a chance to check in. Hope you’re doing good. I’ll call you tomorrow.”

“Hey, it’s me. It’s beautiful here, you should really come along with me one of these times. Meanwhile, it looks like I might be home a couple of days early. Something’s come up, and luckily the stars aligned and I was able to convince the photographer to wrap my part of the shoot today in one really long day rather than having to hang around until Wednesday. So I’ll be seeing you soon. Love you.”

“Hi. Hope everything’s okay. I keep missing you. Anyway, I’m flying stand-by and looks like I’ll be getting on this flight, so I’ll be home late tonight. Can’t wait to see you. I have a surprise for you, too, and also something to ask—something I’ve been thinking about for a while now.”
He cleared his throat.
“So…I’ll see you tomorrow.”

Erica paused with her finger on the key to erase the last message and instead hit replay, listening with growing concern. A surprise? And something to ask?

Oh crap.
Was
he
going to pop the question?

Breaking into a sudden, sickening sweat, she tried to think of what else he could have possibly meant by that sort of uncharacteristically hesitant mention. Trevor was nothing if not confident. But the nervousness in his voice had come through loud and clear. Whatever it was, it was big.

Pulling the Scarlett act again, she firmly turned her mind away from Trevor and back to the job at hand.

* * * *

After spending the rest of her day being surprisingly productive, buried in the depths of her to-do list, Erica finally gave up on working when she found herself drifting off for the third time in as many emails. The world outside the windows was dark and her assistant, Miranda, looked bushed.

“Why don’t you head out? I’m wrapping up anyway,” Erica called to Miranda, and received only a half-hearted wave in response.

Youch. She definitely has a Starbucks card coming for putting up with my crap.

She gathered her things and headed for the door, scrolling through her texts. Nothing from Trevor, so he probably hadn’t landed yet. He was good about letting her know when he was on the ground.

Alone in her car with only her thoughts for company, it was impossible to keep her mind from circling back to the conundrum she found herself in. Suddenly not wanting to go back to her empty condo, she dialled Rhonnie.

“What’s up, girlfriend?” came the greeting over the car’s speakers.

“Well, I was going to ask if you were working, but the background noise answers that question.” The din of the pub was unmistakable. “You guys busy tonight?”

“Very, but I’ll snag you a table if you’re coming by.”

Erica smiled with gratitude. “Thanks. I’ll be there in ten.” She sat up a bit straighter in the driver’s seat of her Audi.

Not sure whether she was using the dinner outing to escape or confront her dilemma, she debated about whether to even raise the discussion with Rhonnie, right up until she actually saw her friend’s face and suddenly found herself fighting back tears.

Rhonnie’s welcoming smile morphed into a look of concern. She took Erica by the elbow, leading her to a somewhat isolated pub table back by an order station. Whispering a drink order to the waiter on the way past, she guided Erica onto one of the stools and immediately sat across from her.

“Okay, spill it. What’s wrong?”

“You’re busy,” Erica hedged, not sure if she wanted to get into it at all, but the sympathetic face was implacable. She took a deep breath. “I’m going to break up with Trevor.”

Just the slightest frown was her friend’s only reaction as she met her gaze steadily, evidently waiting for more information.

“It’s just that…” Erica found herself wanting to tell Rhonnie everything. “It hit me recently that while I do love Trevor, it’s not love-love. I could totally see us together for the long-haul, but there just something…missing.”

Rhonnie nodded sympathetically. Their iced teas arrived and Erica tried to compose her thoughts while taking a few sips without really tasting it.

“He’s been gone on a shoot, and I’ve been totally ducking his calls.”

“Did he get upset?”

“No, just the opposite. He continued to leave messages as his normal cheerful self…well, until today.”

“What did he say?”

Erica shook her head, not sure why she was so upset by the thought of having to turn Trevor down if he did propose. “Well, it’s hard to— Oh, here…I’ll just play it.” She pulled out her phone and went to voicemail, then replayed his final cryptic message from today. Afterward, she looked at Rhonnie, troubled. “Am I jumping to conclusions that he might be thinking about popping the question? What else could he want to ask me that would make him sound so nervous? Something that he’s been thinking about for a while?” She dropped her head onto her hands. “I just don’t know what to do. I don’t want to lose Trevor, but…”

“But you’re at different places in your lives.”

“Yes.” Then she shocked both herself and Rhonnie by adding, “I think I’m ready to look at AI with a donor.”

The decision seemed to well up out of nowhere, but it felt right, much more so than the pipe dream of trying to magically find the right man she could love
and
who wanted kids, right now.

“That’s great, but why do I get the feeling you think Trevor and getting inseminated are mutually exclusive? Have you guys talked about this?”

Erica gratefully accepted a refill of her glass of tea from the waiter and waited for him to leave before answering. “Not specifically, but he’s so young. And the larger point is, he’s not ready to be a parent, even if the baby’s not his. I don’t know if he’ll ever be, and”—she paused, looking down at her fingers, toying with the napkin—“I can’t start this process knowing he’s not going be there for the end result. And I can’t wait.” She looked up and met Rhonnie’s glistening eyes. “I’m forty-four, Rhon. If I don’t do this now, it’s not going to happen.”

“Maybe he’ll surprise you, hon. I think you should tell him what you want to do.”

Erica shook her head, frustrated. “Every time the subject has come up, even peripherally, even that first day—you were there,” she reminded her friend, “he just clams up and gets this really set look on his face. Whatever his reasons are—for not wanting to be a dad, for withdrawing his specimens—they are obviously deep and real and not up for discussion.” She shrugged resignedly. “I guess more than anything that should tell me we’re not right for each other, that he can’t just tell me why he’s so adamant about it. He has to know my interest in the topic, but he avoids it like the plague. Always distracts me with sex,” she grumped, then met Rhonnie’s eyes, and suddenly they were both laughing.

“Well, he does,” she defended, then chuckled, her mood lightening with the hilarity, even though it felt a bit hysterical on her part. “I’m going to do it tonight. He’ll be back from his trip, and I…” She straightened her shoulders as the certainty of her decision gave her some inner strength. “I can’t put it off. It’s not fair to either of us, and besides, after his message today, I think he’s getting more serious about me than he should. It’s time.”

Rhonnie touched her hand comfortingly. “You know I’m here for you no matter what.” She sat back up. “Are you going over now? Do you want some dinner first?”

Erica grimaced. “No, I don’t think I can eat.”

But Rhonnie insisted, and as a compromise, Erica ended up leaving with a wrap in a to-go container.

She pulled into Trevor’s condo complex on the waterfront, found an outdoor guest parking spot and removed his garage door opener from her sun visor with a sigh. Might as well make a clean break, and give him back his keys tonight too. Giving her phone a glance to confirm that, no, he still hadn’t called, she debated what to do. Not wanting to spend any extra time hanging out in his condo—somehow it just felt wrong to be in there alone given her decision—she instead found a bench overlooking the water and mechanically ate her sandwich in the dark.

Another half-hour went by and, getting chilled, she finally succumbed to the lure of Trev’s warm apartment, letting herself in for the last time. It was quiet and dark. She flipped on the entry light, then paused, startled, as she reached to hang his key and opener on the hall tree hook.

Keys on the entry table. And a pair of black loafers kicked haphazardly to the side.

He’s home?

Erica froze now that the moment was upon her. She must have stood there in the hall for ten minutes, fighting with herself on whether to slip out or walk down to his bedroom.

You are so weak
, she chastised herself as her feet led her down the hall, tracing the path she had walked so many times with the man she was about to say goodbye to.

You can talk in the morning. What’s one last night in his arms?

Unable to find an acceptable answer to that, she barely paused at the bedroom door, instead continued inside to find Trevor sprawled out on his bed. His suitcase, unopened, was off to one side, and an untidy pile of clothes were at her feet. He’d evidently just stripped and climbed into bed, exhausted. He must really have been tired if he hadn’t even taken a shower. Her gaze softened as she looked her fill, wishing it could be different. He was in his customary sleeping position on his stomach, hugging his pillow, sheet covering him just to the hips and one leg cocked up. Trevor didn’t snore, but his breathing was audible, heavy and rhythmic.

Not worrying about waking him—he always slept like the dead—Erica took a quick shower to rinse off, then slid into bed next to him. His warm, sleeping scent tickled her nose, and her body began to react, her pussy tingling with anticipation.

Stop it. Time to sleep, not get off.

Trevor’s shoulders were cool to the touch, so she drew the sheet and comforter up over them both and tucked herself up against him, her back to his side. Even with tomorrow’s confrontation looming over her, Erica took comfort in his warming presence, and soon felt herself drifting into sleep.

Chapter Four

Colin was dreaming.

And it was one he was going to hate to wake up from.

The almost-forgotten feeling of blood pooling, tightening his groin, was a huge relief but made it feel almost unbearably sensitive. He could feel every drag and cling of skin on skin as he thrust against the pillowy softness cradling his erection. Sliding his hand, he mapped a curvy, warm form, lost in the sensation of arousal, something he hadn’t experienced for so long.