Falling From Grace (10 page)

“Thank you,” Dani murmured, tears tingling behind her ducts. This felt so
monumental; as if the change were already happening and she didn’t know how to feel about it. Part of her was scared, the other exhilarated. Change was hard. Even if the change was for the better.

“If you can stay out of the tabloids for
three
months, I can get you insured. Okay?”

Dani nodded. “I’ll try.”

“No,” Lindy shook her head, saying firmly. “You have to take control and make sure that it doesn’t happen. No more clubbing, more hanging out with dubious people. Got it?”

“Okay,” Dani agreed, but a tiny voice in the back of her mind questioned if she could really stay away from the scene for that long. She’d come to crave the wild nights and crazy people, even if it was terrible for her and her career. Raina had a way of convincing her to do a lot of things she shouldn’t. She looked to Miles, knowing he was the key to her salvation. “Will you help me?” she asked in a small voice, knowing she really had no right to ask but she needed him desperately.

“I’ll do what I can,” he answered, not quite giving her the whole-hearted dedication she’d been hoping for. “I can’t put my life on hold forever.”

“Of course not,” Lindy said. “And I appreciate everything you’ve done so far.
I know I kinda crashed into your life with my plea for help but,” she glanced at Dani “I think she’s worth it, don’t you?”

Dani held her breath as she awaited his answer. Finally, he offered a small smile and said, “Yeah, she’s worth it” and Dani realized
, not for the first time, the biggest mistake she’d ever made was pushing this man from her life. Was there any way to fix it between them? As in,
really
fix things? Not just a quick bandage fix, but a real healing? She made a promise to try and find out. If not for her, but for Miles because he was a good guy — one of the best.

#

After dinner, Dani went back to the room while Miles hung back for a few minute at Lindy’s request. He knew what was coming and he wasn’t sure how to answer.

“She looks good…sober at least. How are things going? The tension between you is hard to decipher. It almost feels as if you’re still in love with her.”

Should he lie? He couldn’t, not to Lindy. “I do love her,” he admitted, but it didn’t solve anything. No, actually, loving Dani only complicated things. “But you know, we live different lives and I have no interest in following her around in Hollywood to be her arm candy and she has no interest in living elsewhere so loving her only makes things harder.”

“Until she gets some solid footing underneath her, she really should stay away from L.A. The people who put her in this mess will only be waiting for her when she returns and it’ll start all over,” Lindy warned. “And I’m serious about the three-month sobriety. The insurance company needs to know that she’s not going end up costing them too much money.”

“I understand but I can’t force her to do anything. She has to come to that realization on her own.”

“I know. I hope she realizes how much is at stake.”

“Me too.”

Lindy smiled, rubbing his shoulder in sympathy. “She’s gorgeous and stubborn —
 probably the two worst traits to work against but I think you’ve got an ace up your sleeve.”

“Yeah? Want to clue me in?”

Lindy’s smile grew. “She loves you, too.”

His heart tripled in beat but he shook his head. “Even if what you say is true…she loves her career far more than she ever loved me. And that hasn’t changed.”

“Give it time. She’s young and still consumed with the idea of fame. Sooner or later the shine will wear off and she’ll discover that there’s nothing but tin underneath that fool’s gold veneer.”

“Maybe. But I can’t wait around for her to figure that out. I have to live my life, too.”

She nodded. “I get it, buddy. You’re in a sucky position. Just don’t give up prematurely, okay? I guess that’s all I can ask — and I’m not asking for my movie…I’m asking for you. You’re a good guy and you deserve to be with the woman you love, not the woman that comes along as a replacement, got it?”

His cheeks burned because he knew she was referencing his friend, Julianna —
 a woman he met a few months ago at the clinic who was in love with the biggest asshole he’d ever met. When he realized that his feelings for Julianna were never on the same level as what he’d felt for Dani, he stepped out of the way for Boston and the two went off and got married. Well, to be fair, Julianna was also pregnant with Boston’s kid so the scales were pretty tilted in Boston’s favor but still… “I hear you, loud and clear. No one can replace Dani.”

“Then don’t you dare walk away unless you know for a fact there’s no turning back. Otherwise, you’ll spend a lifetime always looking for her in another woman’s face.”

Miles nodded at the profound wisdom. “Thanks for dinner,” he told her as he hugged her goodnight. “Get some sleep.”

“Right after I call the hubbo and the kiddo,” she said, breaking away with a yawn. “The jet lag is setting in but I’ll never hear the end of it if I don’t.”

“You’re probably an epic stepmom,” he said, smiling. “And an awesome wife.”

Lindy beamed, not the least bit modest or shy, and agreed. “I am!”

Miles laughed and let himself out, heading for the bungalow to join the woman he couldn’t exactly have but would never be able to forget. There were no easy answers, not that he’d been expecting any, but he wished he could go back in time and when Dani tried to break it off, instead of walking away without a question, he found a way to hold onto her because losing her only to find her again temporarily is a special kind of hell.

-10-

The following day Dani and Miles were buying fresh mango smoothies from a street vendor when someone yelled out, “Danielle!” causing them both to turn. Paparazzi began snapping pictures while another had a palm-sized video camera. They rushed toward them and Miles, unaccustomed to such an intrusion began telling them off, which as Dani already knew, would only encourage them. “Miles,” she grabbed his arm and began leading him away toward the car “ignore them.”

“How am I supposed to ignore them? They’re practically up my ass!”

She sent a glower at the intruding photographers and hustled to the car, irritated and angry that her paradise with Miles had been invaded
by the scum-sucking parasites. They climbed into the Jeep and took off, leaving the trailing photographers in their wake. They went straight to Larimar, warned Lilah that they might try to follow and gave strict instructions to give no one information as to their whereabouts.

Once inside the safety of the bungalow, Dani flounced into the sofa and groaned. “I think I was lulled into a false sense of security that they wouldn’t find me here,” she said. “They’re like locust
s. Or cockroaches. Basically, paparazzi are the worst of human kind.”

“Do they always do that?” he asked.

“Yes.” She glanced at him. “Freaked you out, huh?”

“Yeah. I think it would freak out most people to have total strangers pop out of the bushes and start snapping pictures at you.”

She sighed unhappily. “I wonder how they found me.”

“Did you tell anyone where you were going?”

“No,” she answered, troubled. “I have no idea how they find out these things. I think they have super human tracking skills.”

“Or someone tracked your cell phone.”

She frowned. “Can people do that?”

“Legally? No. But is it possible? Yes.”

Dani muttered an expletive. “Fan-freaking-tastic. That’s all I need. Those parasites tracking my every move.” She rose and went to the bedroom to get her phone where she’d left it and went to shut it off but noticed several missed calls from Raina. Against her better judgment she listened to her voicemail.

“Girl, I’m freaking out. You haven’t taken any of my calls and I’m starting to worry about my girl. This isn’t like you. I’m the irresponsible one, remember? Okay, I’m going to take a risk and guess that you’re holed up somewhere awesome with that bossy cutie that was at your pad the other day and not dead in a ditch somewhere, and if so, you gotta get your behind back to town because I’ve got someone you have to meet. As in pronto. Call me for deets.”

She clicked off and realized Miles was standing in the doorway. “Everything okay?”

“Um, yeah,” she answered, vacillating on whether or not to tell Miles about Raina’s message. She chewed her lip in indecision until she finally decided to come clean. “It was Raina. She wants me to call her back.”

“If I were you I’d lose her number. She’s no better than those parasite photographers.”

Dani scowled. “She’s my friend.”

“Some friend. Isn’t she the one who sent you home with that douche who tried to assault you? Yeah, with friends like that…you know the saying.”

“She had no idea that that guy was going to pull that. It could’ve happened to anyone.”

“No, it wouldn’t. It wouldn’t have happened to one of
my
friends because I wouldn’t send my drunk friend home with a strange man that I couldn’t vouch for.”

She hated that she knew he was right but her ego was struggling to let go. It sucked to realize your judgment was so skewed when it came to friends. In her heart, she
wanted to believe that Raina probably didn’t mean to be self-centered and shallow but that was just her nature and probably couldn’t fight it. Raina had some good qualities, too. And she was lots of fun. “She knows the right people,” Dani insisted. “And she’s been a good friend during all the transition after
Judgment
. She’s a good person.” Good God, how had she managed to say that with a straight face? Raina was not in the running for Humanitarian Of The Year. She’d once watched Raina taunt a homeless person with the promise of a hundred dollar bill just to see how low she could make them go for the money. It’d ceased to be funny almost immediately and definitely once Dani had realized that Raina had no intention of giving the guy the money. In the end, Dani had returned to the street corner by herself and given the guy some money just to assuage her guilt. “Okay, so she’s not Mother Teresa,” she said, irritated. “But she knows the right people and I just need to talk to her real quick. It could be important.”

“Dani, this is what Lindy was talking about,” he persisted. “People like Raina are only going to drag you down. Cut her loose. I wouldn’t be surprised if it was Raina who found out where you were holed up and sent those piranhas after you.”

“She wouldn’t do that,” Dani said, although she’d often wondered if Raina were the weak link in her chain. She lifted her chin, determined to hold her shaky ground. “You’re wrong. You don’t know Raina like I do.”

“You’re right, I don’t know Raina, but I know plenty of people just like her. L.A. is filled with them —
 all looking for the next host — and honey, she’s latched real tight onto you. The fact that you can’t see her sucking you dry is sad.”

“I don’t tell you how to be a doctor,” Dani shot back, stung by his comment. “I can pick my friends and
hang out with whom I choose. Don’t tell me how to run my life.”

“Yeah because you were doing such a bang-up job before this moment,” he returned caustically, causing her to blink back tears.
“Have you forgotten how I found you? Stumbling around in a drunken stupor, possibly nearing alcohol poisoning while some creep you didn’t even know was trying to get into your pants? What would’ve happened if I hadn’t come along at precisely that moment? Have you thought of that?”

“Of course I have,” she answered mulishly, hating him for bringing it up. “What’s your point?”

“My
point
is your judgment is so out of whack right now you shouldn’t trust yourself to choose between white bread and wheat for your fucking sandwich.”

Oh, that was rude
.
He wasn’t pulling his punches and things could get exponentially worse if she didn’t pull the plug right now. “Why are we fighting about this?” she asked, wiping at her eyes. “This is ridiculous. I’m not going to fight with you about who I can talk to. You’re not my dad, my manager, or even my boyfriend. So butt out!”

A long, uncomfortable stand-off between them sucked the air out of the room and
replaced it with angry tension until Miles threw his hands up in mock surrender and said, “You’re right. It’s your life. Fuck it up in grand fashion for all I care. I’m done.”

“Fine.”
Miles, please don’t go. I’m sorry. You’re right. Don’t you see that I’m a mess and I need you?
If her brain had been in charge, she would’ve said that instead of, “Have fun running your own life for a change” and maybe things would’ve calmed down. But…yeah, clearly her brain wasn’t in charge.

“Yep.” He grabbed a beach towel hanging on a chair and slammed out of the bungalow.

“Shit,” she muttered, sinking onto the bed, staring at her phone. Why did she pick a fight with Miles? He wasn’t saying anything that she didn’t already suspect and frankly, if she were going to follow Lindy’s advice, it would definitely mean cutting Raina from her life for a while. Losing Raina didn’t fill her heart with dread but the idea of losing Miles again certainly did.
Way to go, Einstein.
Well, since she’d already screwed the pooch she might as well see what Raina was so fired up about.

“There you are!” Raina exclaimed, the
raucous sounds of a club making it almost impossible to hear. “Where the fuck are you? Did you fall off the map? Wait, hold on, Imma go outside. It’s loud as fuck in here.” A few seconds later, the noise subsided and Raina, said, “Ah, that’s better. Now, where are you? I was totally worried and then I was jealous because I just know you’re getting some of that hottie doctor action. Am I right?”

Dani ignored Raina’s nosy question and said, “I’m fine. I’m just calling to let you know that I’m good so you don’t
have to worry.” Like Raina was truly worried. Ha! The only thing that managed to get past Raina’s Botoxed face was the threat of running out of parties to frequent. “What’s up?”

“Girl, the scene is not the same without you. Reynolds is all up in my grill asking about you every night. I’m like, dude, I’m not her freaking pimp. Chill! But you know, he’s got a thing for you so he keeps bugging me. As if I know your every move, right?” Reynolds. Ugh. A sudden queasiness crept into her gut and she realized with a small laugh that this was fucking ridiculous. “But seriously, where are you? Did you go to the freaking moon or something?”

“Uh, no, just somewhere that Miles thought would be good to relax. I’m really great, though.”

“Oh. Okay. Well, when you coming home? Oh, fair warning…I had a tiny get together at your pad. It got a little crazy —
 I’m totally never inviting Dezi over to anything ever again. He totally threw up in your bathtub. Gross, huh? Oh, and that beezy Jilly totally fucked in your bed. I mean, how rude, right? I would say never invite her over again but her daddy has money for days and she’s always good for blow if you’re on the scene without any.”

Raina speaking so casually of cocaine, raunchy sex in her bed, and thinking nothing of the fact that Raina had no right to invite people over to Dani’s house when she wasn’t there made everything suddenly so clear
it was like watching her life through sheets of clear glass. “Raina, why did you throw a party in my house when I wasn’t home?”

“Because a girl’s gotta get her freak on, right?” Raina said, laughing and totally missing the point. “Besides, I’m not the one who bailed. If you were here, you totally could’ve
got some serious action. Let me just say — it was
epic
.” She giggled, adding, “Fourways are the new threeways.” And Dani suffered a pang of nausea realizing that Raina had had sex with who knows how many people in her house…probably in her bed, too. She rubbed at the sudden sharp pain between her brows as Raina continued to ramble about her escapades. “And then I said,
bitch
, who do you think you are? You get
my
sloppy seconds, not the other way around.”

“Stop talking,” Dani said, surprising Raina into brief silence.

“What? What did you just say?”

“I said, for the love of God, please stop talking. Your voice is grating on my nerves and I’m already on edge.”

“Fuck. You’re in a mood,” Raina said with a sulk in her voice. “Someone lost their sense of humor.”

She wasn’t even going to waste energy arguing with Raina.
Her monstrosity of a house — too big to ever consider a home — jumped to mind and she realized what she needed to do. “Get my house cleaned up,” she ordered Raina, shocking the woman with her authoritarian tone. “And I’m not paying for the cleaning service either. You threw the party, you clean the mess.”

“Jesus, aren’t you getting laid?” Raina said
. “I mean, damn. You’ve never gotten so butthurt before over a little gathering with friends. What’s the damage now?”

“The damage? I don’t even know where to start but I’m going to start with that house. Get it cleaned. And I mean
sparkling
. Were you raised by wolves? You don’t throw a party in someone else’s house and then leave a fucking mess, you social disease.”

“What the
fuck
did you just call me?”

She laughed. “A social disease. Listen, this isn’t the first time you’ve fucked me over but it will be the last. Raina, I’ve come to the realization that you’re no friend. I don’t know why it took this long to figure it out.”

“Excuse me? Who’s been introducing you to all the right people for the last six months? Yeah, that was me. Who held your hair when you barfed your guts out at Crimson? Yeah, me again. Sounds like a friend to me. Maybe you’re the one who hasn’t been a good friend.”

“Spare me, Raina. If you’re going to rewrite history, at least be creative about it. You’ve been introducing me to people who only want to drag me down. Directors with dubious reputations and people who are obvious users. And that time you held my hair? You took a Sna
pchat while I threw my guts up! And then, when the picture ended up in the tabloids? I actually believed your lie that someone must’ve screenshot the snap. I don’t doubt that you were the one who gave the pic to the tabloids, not some random person in your contact list like you suggested.”

“Well, well, aren’t we going all Nancy Drew with a s
plash of Goody Two Shoes. Bravo,” Raina shot back with enough acid fill a lake. “I can’t believe I wasted time worrying about your skank ass. Like I don’t have better things to do.”

“
Let’s be honest, Raina, your care and concern for me is directly proportional to what I can do for you.”

Raina actually laughed and said, “Well, it was fun while it lasted. You should see half the pics I have on my phone of you when you were too trashed to notice. I held onto them for a rainy day and it seems to me that a storm is heading your way. I’m sure someone is willing to pay
for these little gems. And for the record, bitch, you’re right it was me who called the paparazzi on your little love nest. Yeah, I know where you are and always do. I’ve made a pretty penny on your stupid ass. I get paid each time they snap a pic of your drunk face. How’s that feel, dumbass?”