Read I Hope You Find Me Online

Authors: Trish Marie Dawson

Tags: #action adventure, #urban disaster fiction, #women heros, #romance adult fiction, #thriller and mystery, #series book 1, #dystopian adventure, #pandemic outbreak, #dogs and adventure, #fantasy about ghosts

I Hope You Find Me (2 page)

BOOK: I Hope You Find Me
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During the last conversation I had with my
mother, she had tried to hide it, but I heard the ragged breathing
and could almost feel the fever through the phone and I knew she
was sick too. Before the land lines went out I called everyone I
could think of. My family, friends, coworkers and even my students,
but most didn’t answer their phones and the few that did were all
sick. This wasn’t a cold anyone recovered from; the virus was fast
and efficient, killing the infected within forty-eight hours. The
National T.V. called it the Cardinal Plague but the local radio
stations mostly referred to the outbreak as the Red Death. I didn’t
care about the name, but it was efficient - more so than anyone
could have possibly imagined.

Almost a week had passed since the power grid
went off and only the tops of a handful of buildings had emergency
lights still flickering on and off. At night the whole city seemed
to disappear into the darkness, and I wanted to be out of the city
by nightfall. I knew my Mom would be dead by the time we made it to
her apartment, but I had to know for certain - I couldn’t move on
without knowing.

Once we made it within eyesight of the
freeway on-ramp it was clear I wouldn’t be able to drive into
downtown from there, so I drove on side streets as parallel to the
main roads as I could, slowly weaving between parked cars and
driving on the sidewalks and embankments when necessary. Every
street going in and out of the city was too congested to pass
through freely.

The air was cool despite the morning sun as
we inched along the streets leading into downtown. Eventually
vehicles blocked the way forward, and with no room to turn the Jeep
around, I had to leave it wedged between a chain-link fence and an
old Buick, and decided to walk the rest of the way. All we needed
for the day was shoved into my large back pack but I left the extra
dog food since I planned on returning to the Jeep on my way out of
the city.

Zoey looked at me as we wiggled between the
cars full of rotting people. Her big, dark chocolate-brown eyes
pleaded with me for answers and all I could think of to say was,
“Don’t worry girl, it’s going to be okay.” But I didn’t believe my
own words. When would it ever be okay again?

The silence of the city was overwhelming; a
place that was once in a constant state of activity was completely
devoid of sound and movement. Even the dog felt the heavy weight
from the dead buildings. Loft windows seemed to watch us with sad,
glassy eyes as we hurried down the empty sidewalks toward the
epicenter of San Diego and I kept our pace quick.

We stopped at a corner and watched police
tape flap about in the breeze that had been wrapped completely
around a small parking lot that was full of medical vans and police
vehicles. I carefully approached each car, peering inside. Every
window of a plain black sedan with exempt plates had been
shattered, its contents riffled through. Someone had already picked
each vehicle clean. Piled up behind one of the vans was a heap of
body bags, at least ten feet high, and equally as wide. I backed
out of the lot before my mind had the chance to tell my stomach to
purge breakfast.

One block further and parked at an angle in
the middle of the street was a military tank. Part of the store
front nearest the tank was blown inward, scattering huge chunks of
concrete, glass and wood dozens of feet into the street. Pieces of
trash and debris had settled on the front of the massive machine
and the littered look of the scene gave the impression it had been
there for years, not the weeks it had taken for the city to die. We
kept walking, our eyes facing forward, feet pounding the pavement
as a rancid, smoky smell drifted along the wind, similar to what my
own backyard smelled like…burnt corpses. I did not want to find the
source.

 

***

 

My Mother’s apartment was on the fourth floor
of a small corner complex. I stood in the street for a full minute,
debating on whether I truly wanted to go inside. I had watched my
son, my ex-husband and finally my daughter, take their last breaths
in my arms. I wasn’t sure if I was ready to find my Mother dead too
in her small one bedroom apartment. So I stood there, staring at
the entry door as if she would walk out of it at any second. With
my eyes closed, I could almost hear the traffic and shouts and
laughs of a once thriving public. But with my eyes open, all I
could hear was my steady and slightly rushed heartbeat and the
ragged panting of a nervous canine at my feet.

A raven flew out of a nearby tree, sending a
piercing caw in our direction so loud that Zoey and I both jumped.
It was enough to snap me out of my semi-trance and I squared my
shoulders and closed the gap between the street and the front door
in ten long strides. When I tugged on the metal handle nothing
happened. It didn’t budge. I slammed all my weight up against the
frame and it rattled, but wouldn’t give. The only option was to
break in. The closest thing nearby that was heavy enough to go
through the tempered glass was a metal trashcan. I had to roll it
on its side to move it and it took several impacts against the door
to crack the glass. After kicking the broken shards out enough to
pass through, the smell of decay drifted from inside the building
out into the fresh air. Zoey sneezed violently and refused to enter
with me.

“Come on, girl. You can do it.” I urged
her.

She sat on the edge of the curb with a sad
look, her droopy eyes moist.

“Let’s go.” I willed her toward me, my hands
patting my legs. She mocked a sneeze and glanced away from me.

I stood with my hands on my hips, chewing
nervously at my lower lip, wondering which would be less traumatic:
leaving her outside, alone on the street, or carrying her
unwillingly into the building and forcing her up the stairs with
me. I glared at her, and just as I was about to turn and leave her
sulking on the curb, a shrill scream erupted from down the street.
Its echo bounced off the brick buildings with an eerie rhythm. The
hairs rose on the back of my neck as I pondered briefly whether the
scream was human, or animal, and Zoey’s nervous glances up and down
the sidewalk gave me the answer I needed. She wasn’t staying
outside without me.

 

***

 

All thirty pounds of her squirmed and wiggled
under my arm as I stomped up the dark stairwell, cursing under my
breath as she fought against me. On the second level I let her go
and she followed at my heels until we reached the fourth floor
landing. We stood there, the two of us simply looking at each
other. At that moment if felt as if the narrow stairwell was the
portal to some unknown universe, like leaving those steps would
take us to a place we couldn’t return from.

After pushing through the door, the smell of
the hallway hit me like a brick and I swooned, fearing I might pass
out from the overwhelming stench. Zoey whimpered at my knees as I
ran to the end of the walkway and paused briefly in front of the
last door. It was unlocked, but I still knocked gently and entered
with a sleeved hand cupped tightly around my nose and mouth.

I was in the apartment no more than fifteen
seconds. Mom had died in her bed, clothed in a nightgown, with a
note folded in one of her bloated and discolored hands. A ray of
sunshine penetrated through a gap in the blinds, sending a soft
stream of light across her pillow, lighting her strawberry blonde
hair and making the strands of grey shimmer. A dark fluid had begun
to run down the side of the mattress forming a goopy puddle on the
floor. I gagged as my stomach threatened to expel what little had
collected there since morning, staying only long enough to take the
scrap of paper, cover her and leave. I took the stairs down two at
a time, choking back sobs, my eyes stinging with tears. My family,
they were all gone. Everyone was gone.

 

***

 

After vomiting up everything that was in my
stomach, and dry heaving for nearly five minutes, I collapsed up
against the building and rested my head back against the cool red
and brown brick until the sunlight felt hot on my face. Zoey lay
next to me, her head resting on my thigh, comforting me the only
way a dog knows how. I slowly rubbed the top of her head as I read
my Mom’s note out loud to her.

 

Sweetie,

Part of me hopes that you never read this
letter. I know I’m dying and I don’t want you to find me here like
this. But if you came here, you must be safe and that is what
comforts me now. I love you, so much. And I hope I said it enough.
Humanity may have destroyed itself, but if you are here, if you are
ok, then there is still hope. Never lose your hope. Love you, like
you and care about you. Always.

Mom

 

***

 

I had to change. I so badly wanted out of my
soiled clothes I was almost tempted to walk the streets naked. Even
though I had only been in the tight quarters of my Mother’s
apartment for less than a minute, everything I wore, even my skin
and hair, smelled like death. Zoey didn’t smell any better and she
knew it. God, we needed a shower.

Before we left the apartment I pulled a piece
of paper out of my pack and wrote on it carefully before taping it
to the inside of the complex lobby window.

 

1/9 12:30pm

Family and Friends: No one is alive here. It
seems the City is dead. I’m moving on to the bus station then the
airport. I’ll leave a message for you at Terminal One.

I hope you find me. - Riley

 

I went back inside the building to the public
restroom and tried the faucets but only a hollow echo vibrated
through the pipes. It was quickly becoming an all-around sucky
day.

Once outside again, I stood on the empty
sidewalk looking up and down the street, squinting into the sun. It
was maybe a thirty minute walk straight to the bay. The water would
be cold, but it would be better than walking around with that
stench clinging to my body, checking building after building,
hoping for a working faucet.

We turned west toward the mall. It took a
while to find replacements for what I was wearing, as well as what
I’d need to scrub my skin and hair. When we made it back to
Broadway, over an hour had passed; the sun was directly above us
but there was a chill in the air. The bus depot was before the bay
so we continued west, and as we walked through an empty
intersection I saw movement out of the corner of my eye.


Help me.”
A man’s voice whispered
from behind my right ear.

I jumped and uttered a startled yelp but when
I whirled around, the street was empty. If Zoey hadn’t bristled and
growled I would have thought I’d imagined the whole thing. I stood
very still as I looked up and down the buildings and store fronts
for any sign of movement.

“Hello?” I couldn’t keep my voice from
shaking.

Taking a few more steps into the intersection
I cleared my throat and tried to hide the tremor in my voice as I
yelled once more, “Hello… anyone there?”

From one of the corner buildings, a metal
door slammed shut with a heavy bang, causing me to flinch. Zoey
began turning in circles and barking loudly in the direction we had
come from. Then, she bolted. Not knowing what else to do I ran
after her, calling her name, struggling to hold onto my bags while
the pack thumped heavily against my back. Twice I looked over my
shoulder and the second time I thought I saw someone watching us
from a street corner, but I didn’t stop running until the stitch in
my side became unbearable. I could see Zoey off in the distance, a
small dark speck on the horizon.

Well that’s just great.
I muttered to
myself.

As I collapsed to my knees, my eyes strained
to take in everything around me. Every sense I had was heightened.
I could smell the salt in the air from the nearby ocean mingling
with the rot of the city. While my knees pressed into the concrete
of the sidewalk, I listened to the creak of the tree branches and
the scraping sound of a small paper cup as it rolled along the
gutter, and an empty humorless laugh escaped my mouth at the fact
that I was losing my mind.

I inhaled deeply and started moving again,
but Zoey was nowhere to be seen. For a little dog she sure could
run. I was more than irritated that she bailed on me, which wasn’t
her usual protective style but I knew something (
or someone
)
must have really scared her. Every few feet I whistled for her, and
called out her name. Two blocks past the bus depot and there she
was, standing on the sidewalk, cowering behind a large metal
trashcan, looking at me sheepishly. I stopped about ten feet from
her and put my hands on my hips. A gesture she knew well.

“Yeah, you know you blew it, don’t you?” I
asked her with a mocking edge of firmness to my voice.

I waited for her to creep her way to me and
when she got to my feet I folded my arms across my chest and raised
an eyebrow at her and glared. She flopped down and rolled
submissively onto her back waiting for a tummy rub. Several minutes
later, after the petting and soothing on my part and face licking
on her part, we started walking again, back to the depot.

I told myself we were both seeing and hearing
things that weren’t there, but that didn’t keep me from looking
over my shoulder every few seconds and staring nervously into the
shadows around us. Zoey kept her tail tucked between her legs and
her head low, as if something would attack us at any moment. The
longer she continued on like that, the more I felt we weren’t
alone.

I couldn’t shake the feeling that we were
being watched very closely.

 

***

 

There was no reason to go inside the
Greyhound station. People had flocked to the small transit station
hoping to get on a bus that would take them out of the city, but
the buses couldn’t get them far, and there were more people trying
to leave than there were buses.

BOOK: I Hope You Find Me
6.4Mb size Format: txt, pdf, ePub
ads

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