Losing to Win (7 page)

Mal slid back to stand next to me and squeezed my shoulder. I looked up at him. He was staring down at me with a mix of admiration, pride, and pleasure. “You heard the lady, Mr. Swindle. Bring it.”

Jim smiled wide, almost blinding us with his teeth. “Carissa Wayne and Malachi Knight, you will be playing ‘truth or dare' tonight! We'll prepare the questions and the dares. You'll have to complete five rounds. If you forfeit or walk away, you stay in last place. If you complete all five rounds to the judges' satisfaction, you move to first place and you win this week's cash prize.”

I rolled my eyes for the umpteenth time that day. “What are we? Back in junior high again?”

“Who are the judges?” Mal asked.

I nodded. “Oh, good question, Mal.”

Jim bared his Zoom-whitened teeth again in his Hollywood version of a smile and pointed. “Your fellow contestants.”

“Yes!” Suzette said with a pump of her fist. Even though she looked like holy hell and basically had had Jordy carry her through the obstacle course, she seemed to be enjoying my abject humiliation and discomfort with genuine giddiness.

XJ, who had stayed pretty quiet all day, just shook his head. “Wow, this is not your day, Cari.”

“Tell me about it,” I agreed. I caught Niecy's eye and glared at her. “This is all your damn fault!”

She blinked twice. “Beg pardon? How do you figure? What did I do?”

“All that snarky attitude you were giving the camera in the confessional earlier. The bounce-back bad jou jou landed on me.”

She laughed and shrugged her shoulders. “Better you than me.”

“Jou jou?” Jim asked uncertainly. “What is jou jou?”

This time my grin was wide as I walked past him toward the refreshment table. “Yes, Jim, le jou jou: the Louisiana equivalent of karma. Something you should worry about . . . a lot.” I grabbed a bottle of water and emptied it over my head. Looking over my shoulder, I asked, “Is it time for our next two bites of food yet?”

 

 

W
e were all gathered in the third floor common room, really just a lounge with some televisions, tables, couches, and a refrigerator full of zero-calorie, sugar-free drinks. At some point this evening, XJ found out that most of the rooms had hidden cameras and mics. Ever since learning that little tidbit, we'd ceased to relax completely. Tense is too polite a word to describe the atmosphere in the lounge. It had been a long day; people were tired, irritated, sore, and hungry. Not the best combination.

Carissa sat next to me on the long, low couch with legs crossed, arms crossed, and a “can we do this already” look on her face. She was wearing a brightly colored V-neck top and some knee-length pants with sandals. Her hair was done up and she had makeup on. She looked nice. I had changed into jeans and a polo shirt.

XJ and Niecy lounged on the sofa across from us. Both looked as if they could fall to sleep at any moment. Jordan was sitting on the edge of the chair on the other side of Carissa. Suzette was the only one who was buzzing with energy. She was pacing back and forth, clearly looking forward to Carissa's continued discomfort.

I remembered Suzette from back in the day. During her junior high and high school glory days, over one hundred pounds ago, she had been—at least in looks alone—the prettiest girl in Belle Haven. She was that classic Louisiana mix of African, French, Indian, and Spanish heritage that manifested in creamy skin; long, wavy hair; and curves for days. Suzette was one of those cute girls who knew she was cute and she was particularly skilled at using that cute to get what she wanted. I couldn't even count the number of times she had theoretically tossed her panties in my face. She kept offering; I kept turning her down. No doubt that contributed to her violent dislike of Carissa. Even though we ran in the same circles, I never had the slightest interest in Suzette. Especially not after hooking up with Carissa.

From the minute Carissa and I met at age thirteen, it was always her. I'm not saying there weren't a few instances where I'd strayed along the way, but at the end of the day, I always knew that I wanted Carissa Melody Wayne to be mine. And I'd blown it. So far, this competition wasn't helping the state of whatever relationship we had left.

“You guys ready?!” Bliss bounded into the room with various crew members billowing in behind her. I exchanged a glance with Carissa and we both rolled our eyes. The whole “truth or dare” concept was on some epic bullshit level, but if it got us back on top, I figured it was worth it.

Jim walked in the room just as the crew set up backdrops and lighting. He was handed a microphone, which he clipped onto his lapel before turning to face the room. The additional lighting turned on and Bliss counted down. “We're live in 3–2–1...”

“Good evening, contestants,” Jim chirped enthusiastically. “How was the first day for everyone?”

He was met with stares and outright glares. He laughed. “Okay, it was a tough day. I get it, but tonight will be fun. We're here to play a game. Who's with me?”

Suzette smiled. “I'm ready. Let's go!”

Beckoning her closer to him, Jim waved some index cards at all of us. “All right, then. How about if we go over the rules again and then Suzette will kick off the game for us!”

I personally hated how dude sounded like he ended all of his sentences with an exclamation point, but whatever. If this was how they wanted to play this TV thing, it was just a means to an end. I caught Carissa's eye and we nodded. We were on the same page, whatever they threw at us—we were going to handle it.

“Okay, this is ‘truth or dare.' We're playing five rounds. Each round you are allowed to hear the question first, then you have to choose to answer the question with the truth or take the dare. You cannot do all truths or all dares. If you don't answer and you don't take the dare, you have one opportunity to pass the dare to one other contestant. You can only pass the dare once. If you refuse to answer and don't take the dare OR your other contestants are dissatisfied with your answer or your completion of the dare, you forfeit the game and stay in last place. If you complete all five rounds successfully, you move into first place. First place means you win the bonus money for today's challenge; you win points toward your final score. In the overall scope, if you get first place three times, you not only get bonus points but immunity from an upcoming challenge. Any questions?”

Why they were determined to complicate a simple game confused me. As with most games, the person with the most points at the end of the game won. Every challenge you won brought you closer to winning the whole game. I spoke up. “We win, we rock. We lose, we suck. Got it.”

Jim nodded. “Basically, yes. Ready for the first round? Let's go. Suzette, please read the first question aloud.”

She snatched the card, read the question, and her eyes started to gleam. “Both of you must answer this question truthfully or accept the dare. The first question to you is: Who broke off the engagement?”

I drew in a quick breath. Aw, hell. They were going straight for the dirt. I guess I should have expected it, but I didn't. I thought they'd ask some crazy questions about our sex life or my life as a football player, but this was just some
National En-quirer
–type bullshit. I looked at Carissa and she looked resigned. Clearly, she had been expecting something like this.

“Well?” Suzette crowed. “Are you going to tell the truth or take the dare?”

I leaned into Carissa. “What do you want to do?”

“I'm sure as hell not taking the dare. They clearly have this rigged to make us as uncomfortable as possible. Let's just tell the truth and be closer to being done.”

Sitting back with my arms crossed, I answered the question. “Carissa broke off the engagement.”

“Seriously?” Suzette asked in disbelief.

Jim took the index card from her. “Carissa, is that the truth?”

“That is the truth.”

“Why?” Suzette asked.

Both Cari and I sat mutely staring her down, though I was sorely tempted to tell her it was none of her damn business.

“We're not required to answer follow-up questions, are we, Jim?” Carissa asked, her foot tapping the air in irritation.

“No, you are not. Are the judges satisfied with the answer?”

Everyone but Suzette nodded.

“Next question. Jordan, you have the honor of asking it.”

Jordy stood up and took the card. He read the question and shot me an apologetic look. “Okay, the next question. Were either of you ever unfaithful to the other during the course of your relationship?”

What the hell were these questions? I felt myself getting irritated. I braced myself and prepared to tell the truth. This would suck, since I was trying to get back into the NFL and get back my endorsement deals, and being known as a former philanderer would not help me along. But sometimes a man had to do what he had to do. I had wanted this show; I wanted first place; this was the cost. Carissa put a hand on my thigh. I met her eyes. She shook her head.

“Let's take the dare.”

“Really?”

She nodded shortly. “Really.”

I turned to Jordan. “We'll take the dare.”

He flipped the card and shook his head. “One of you has to kiss someone else in the group.”

“So we are back in junior high.” Carissa rolled her eyes. “Why don't we just break out spin the bottle and be done with it.”

Jim smiled insincerely. “First you have to decide which one of you will do the kissing and then the panel will decide who you get to kiss.”

Suzette was practically vibrating with excitement. Oh hell no. I sent Carissa a pleading look. Grabbing her hand, I murmured into her ear, “I promise to write a check toward that teen program you want to start if you take this one. Please do not let that woman get her lips near me.”

Carissa giggled. “Does big strong Malachi Knight need Carissa Wayne to save the day?”

To hear her laugh like that with me again was worth anything. I dropped my voice. “Girl, whatever you want—it's yours. Name it.”

The awareness that was never far from the surface flared up between us. Her eyes met mine again as she took in the heat of my regard. “I just might hold you to it, you know.”

“You can hold me to anything. Please do,” I said huskily, letting her take that any way she wanted. Damn, I'd missed talking to her, being around her, getting inside her. Shifting closer, I reached over and took her hand in mine. “Any damn time.”

Jim cleared his throat. “Um, Carissa? Mal? The kiss?”

Carissa sent me a slow smile and answered, “I'll do it.”

“Judges, who should Cari kiss?” Jim continued brightly. “We're open-minded here. It can be a man or a woman.”

I laughed when I saw the dismay that crossed Suzette's face. Then I frowned when I saw the anticipation on Jordan's face. XJ was looking kinda eager too. I agreed with Carissa; I was ready to be done with this.

XJ, Suzette, Jordan, and Niecy huddled together for a few minutes before turning as one to Jim. Suzette stepped forward with a smirk that spelled trouble. “We chose Jordy. Jordy will be kissing Carissa.”

Jim nodded. “On the lips, count to five, that's it.”

My eyes narrowed when I saw the look that passed between Jordy and Carissa. Was there a story here I wasn't aware of? Jordan extended his hand to Carissa. When she put her hand in his, I tensed. Then I forced myself to relax. I knew they were hoping for a big reaction from me and I wasn't going to give it to them.

No. I wasn't. Not even when Jordan pulled my woman (yes, my woman) close and slid one hand behind her neck and one around her waist. Tilting her head up, he approached this kiss like a man who had been waiting for this moment for a long, long time and meant to enjoy every second.

And even though I really wanted to swing the dude, I held it back as he slid first lips then tongue across Carissa's lips. The lips that I firmly believed belonged to me and me alone and always would. When he slipped in between those lips, I held back. But when he pulled her tighter and took an extra taste and groaned into her mouth? And she wasn't backing away? Aw hell no. I stood up and took a step forward.

I don't know if she sensed me behind her or was already wrapping it up, but Carissa eased back, took a deep breath, shared another of those unfathomable looks with Jordan, and turned toward everyone else. “We good?”

Niecy's brows went up. “Uh, yeah, girl. You good?”

Carissa just shook her head and sat back down on the couch. “Next question.”

I remained standing with my arms folded across my chest. I sent Jordan a look. He looked back without blinking. This was going to be a problem. I'd had about enough of this bullshit.

Jim cleared his throat. “All right, then, let's continue.” He looked at me nervously and shuffled the index cards.

The next two questions were fairly tame in comparison to the first two. I answered a question about my knee. Carissa answered a question about her students. We answered the final question about whether we thought we'd ever get back together differently. I said, “Time will tell.” She said, “Right now I can't fathom how.”

We stared at each other. My eyes fell to her lips, still slightly swollen from kissing another man. The urge to wipe off all traces of his kiss and imprint mine instead was almost overwhelming. The one thing I knew for sure was that Carissa and I weren't finished. Not by a long shot. There was still that certain something that drew us together against all practical odds.

“Guys.” Marcy's voice cut into our staring contest. “You won the challenge. Can we get you in the confessional for five minutes before we wrap?”

“Do we have a choice?” we said at the same time.

“Not really.”

“Well, then.” I grabbed Carissa's hand and pulled her forward. “Let's see what there is to confess this evening.”

 

 

“Did you and Jordy have some kind of a thing I don't know about?” I asked the minute we sat down in the small room. Because, the kind of familiarity they just displayed? Not a new thing. Something was going on and I wanted to know what the hell it was.

Carissa looked at me skeptically. “Are you crazy? No, we did not. You do realize everything we're saying is being filmed, right?”

“I don't care. What was that?” Film or no film, I wanted answers.

“What was
what
?” She raised her hands in confusion.

“That kiss!”

“It was just a kiss.”

“It wasn't
just
a kiss. That was a serious kiss. Like something y'all had done before. Let me ask you something.”

“Might as well.” She shot me a look warning me not to say anything too crazy.

I ignored it. “Did you wanna skip the question on infidelity for my sake or yours?” Not until I saw her with Jordy did I wonder if maybe she had a few things to hide as well.

She gasped. “You have GOT to be kidding me.”

“I don't know, Cari. That's why I'm asking.”

“Right now, with the film rolling? Excellent, Mal. You know damn good and well I never cheated on you. It wouldn't have occurred to me. If you take a minute to think about what you're saying, you'll understand how hard I'm trying not to slap you silly right now.”

One look at her balled-up fists and the fire in her eyes shooting angry daggers at me and I knew I was wrong. I kept putting the wrong foot forward with her. “Okay, Cari. Okay. I'm sorry. My only excuse is that I still consider you mine on some level and that kiss threw me.”