Night Sky (Satan's Sinners MC Book 3) (10 page)

We never break eye contact as he continues thrusting into me finding the perfect rhythm. Our bodies are slick with sweat as we glide together, pound for pound. My hips lift as his come down. We both find the sweet release we were chasing and watching him as we both cum was the sexiest thing I have ever seen.

WRITER

You Don't Know Her Like I Do by Brantley Gilbert

I get up and get ready, thinking today would be a good day. Maybe I could talk to Ever. I could apologize for what she saw yesterday. I get my workout done and shower. We don’t have church today so I decide to go play a game of pool. I get the balls broke and make two striped ones in the pockets. Then I see her.

Seeing Ever walk into my clubhouse with another guy pisses me the fuck off. Is she trying to make me jealous or did she move on that fuckin' quick? Either case makes me furious. I can feel my face heat up from anger and my eyes narrow. Am I not worth a fight? This might make me sound like a pussy, but I want her to fight for me, fight for the relationship she gave up and wanted back. And look at that fake ass smile on her face. Who knows, she could have brought this fucker back from New York with her and she’s just playing games. She may be pissed at me, but the connection is still there. I felt it and so did Ever.

Two can play this motherfuckin' game!

I stop my game of pool and see a cute little blonde off in the corner, so I go over, taking her hand in mine and lead her to my room. Along the way, I make sure to show Ever how angry I am and to bump into the fucker she’s with. This chick thinks she’s gonna get my cock in her, but she’s in for a surprise. Ever didn't like seeing me with that whore yesterday, I know she didn't.

When we get in my room, I shut the door behind us and motion for her to sit on the bed. I pull out my baggie of coke, pouring some out on top of my dresser. I pull out a bill and my driver’s license from my wallet. Taking the card, I smash down the coke and form a few lines. I roll up the bill, bend down, close one nostril, and snort one of the rails. I repeat my action, snorting up another rail with the opposite nostril. Standing back up, my eyes water and then everything starts to go numb. I hold the rolled up bill out to the girl, and she stands up, taking it from me and does the last rail on the dresser.

I walk over, plopping down at the head of my bed with her following behind. She sits down as close as she can get beside me and reaches over, gripping my waistband, trying to get my jeans undone. Before she makes any progress, I cover her hands with mine, stopping her. When I get her hands loosened up, I shake my head no. I had no intentions of bringing her in here and doing anything with her, I just wanted Ever to think I did. The girl gives me a confused look before she drops back on my bed. I see my light flashing, letting me know someone is at my door.

When Crazy Girl started teaching me how to sign, she had Hanger get someone to install a light switch on the outside of my door that connects to my bedroom light. It was really nice of her to do because it gave me more privacy, instead of the guys just walking in whenever they wanted like they used to do. If they would have walked in on Ever and me, I would’ve had to beat the shit outta my brothers.

I get up off the bed, go open the door, and Crazy Girl and Lil Mama are standing there looking guilty as shit.
What do you two want?

Crazy Girl signs,
We want to talk to you.

Being the asshole I am and still pissed off, I reply,
Don't you think you should be out there with your sister and her new man?

Lil Mama jumps in.
That’s not fair and you know it. We just wanna talk. Besides, he's not her boyfriend. He’s gay.

My shoulders shake with humorless laughter as the blonde gets up, comes over to us and puts her arm around me, then says something. The guilty looks wash away as anger replaces it. Fuck! What did this chick just say?

Crazy Girl asks,
Is that true, Writer? Are you too busy to talk to us?

I move away from the door, letting them through then pulling this chick’s arm off of me. She had no business opening her fuckin' mouth, saying shit. I push her out of my room then shut the door. I turn to them signing,
Now, what do you want?

Crazy Girl responds,
You need to talk to Ever.

And why would I do that?
I cock my brow at them with a perplexed look on my face.

Lil Mama says,
Because this is our fault.

I'm getting more confused by the second.

What is your fault exactly?

Crazy Girl then goes on to tell me,
She took off walking after you came in here. Can you please go find her and talk to her?

Yeah. You say she took off walking?

Yes!

I know exactly where she is. The girls leave my room with me right behind them. I walk outside and immediately go to the ladder, stopping so I can take a couple deep breaths in and out before I start climbing up to our spot. When I get on the rooftop, I stay there for a moment, just watching her. It makes my gut clench and heart fuckin' hurt that I can't wrap her in my arms like I used to.

I stand there admiring her beauty. She was always and still is the prettiest girl I have ever seen. She always will be. She brings those sky blue eyes to mine. They used to be filled with so much happiness and wonderment, but now it's sadness, sorrow, regret, and hurt. I hate that I'm the one who caused her pain and I don't want her to regret the decision she made to go to New York. I just want to come to terms with why she left.

Ever pats the space next to her so I make my way over and sit down. This is the closest I’ve been to her in a year and I still feel that pull toward her. I'm not ready to start the conversation I know we need to have and she isn't either. We just stare out at the emptiness of the country that surrounds us. After a few minutes, she taps me on the arm and I feel the electrical current run through my body, just like it always did. Whenever she would touch me for the two years that we were together, it was like shocks zapping me, but not painfully. We both turn towards each other, sitting cross legged and giving our undivided attention to the other.

She decides to start,
How do we get past this point, Writer?

I don't know. You left me and everyone seems to have forgotten that. Who was the douchebag?
I try to simmer the rage that is starting to bubble so I take a couple deep breaths.

He’s a friend from school. I'm not even his type, and I can't believe I stooped to this level. He’s gonna help me with Zoey's wedding dress.
Regret fills those sky blue eyes.

Were you trying to make me jealous?

Yes,
she nods while signing,
it was Zoey and Jacey's idea, so you can thank them for that one. I knew it was gonna be bad, but I went along with it anyway.
The fuckin' instigators. It’s bad business when those two girls get together.

It was a shitty plan, but it worked. I hated seeing another guy touching you and kissing you.

I hated what I saw too. I can't really be made at you for being with someone else, but you didn't need to smile at me while doing it.

I'm sorry for that, I really am. I don't know what came over me. It was wrong and I knew it as soon as I did it. I think I was in shock or something. You were just standing there. You looked so pretty and put together. I guess I wanted to hurt you as much as I'm still hurting. I don't think you understand what it did to me when you left.

I looked so put together because I couldn't wait to see you! I was so happy I was going to get to be near you. I have been hurting the entire time I have been gone, not just you, Writer. I wasn't so put together in New York either. I made a mistake! It was the biggest one I’ve ever made and it hurt me too, having to leave you. I'm not sorry I went because I feel like if I would’ve stayed I would have regretted that also. It was a lose-lose for me, but I never wanted to resent you and if I wouldn't have left, I would have. I would’ve blamed you for making me stay and we would’ve ended up hating each other. I never want to hate you or have you hate me.

Now that I can actually listen to what she is saying, I understand more, but that don’t mean it doesn’t hurt still.
I wasn't understanding before, but I do now. I just want the pain to stop.

I never wanted to hurt you.

I know you didn't.

Why didn't you come for me?

I did!
I bore my eyes into hers, letting her know I’m completely serious.

What?
Her brows furrow and she tilts her head like she doesn't understand.

I did. The day you left, I came to the airport, but it was too late, you were already boarding the plane. So I stayed for awhile and sent you some texts. When you never responded, I realized I lost you, so being defeated, I went back to the clubhouse. Over the next couple weeks, I sent text after text, hoping like hell you would respond, but you never did. I didn't wanna leave it like we did and I thought maybe we could work something out to stay together.

Oh God, Writer!
She covers her mouth with her hand and tears start welling up in her eyes before she adds,
I never knew! I didn't hear from you that last week after our fight and then I thought you didn't come for me. I was hurt and angry. I threw my phone in the trash and got a new one when I landed in New York.

I figured Zoey would’ve told you. She knew I came for you.

She shakes her head no.
I asked her and our parents not to tell me anything. It would’ve been too hard. If I would have seen you that day, I don't think I could’ve walked away from you.

Maybe you not seeing me happened for a reason.

Yeah maybe,
she hesitates, then continues,
Why are you doing drugs?

Ah fuck! I knew someone would open their big fuckin' mouth and tell her.

Everything I have done since you left has all been to try and forget about you, get you out of my system. The pain I feel is unbearable most days, so the fighting, the gym, tattoos, the drugs and alcohol, and all the whores — it's all been to forget, to make this just a fraction easier to deal with.

Has it worked?

No! Not at all.

Will you stop? I'm back now. You don't have to hurt anymore.

You may be back, but you're not mine anymore.

I’ve always been yours. Do you still love me?

I never stopped, but I can't get into this with you again.

So where do we go from here?

She’s continuously blinking back the tears that threaten to fall and I’m trying to be as honest as I can. I don’t wanna lie to her.

First off, you don't listen to your sister or Lil Mama anymore. They have terrible plans and are trouble.
Smiling at each other, I add,
I'll make a deal with you. You don't bring anymore guys here with you and you won't see me with anymore whores. I wanna be your friend.

Did you really just pull the friend card? How, after everything, are we supposed to be friends?

I'm not really sure, but I would rather have you as my friend than not have you at all.

Okay deal! Do you still come up here?

Yeah. I'll tell you a secret. I’ve come up here many nights and wrote you letters or drew portraits of you.

You did? I wrote you letters almost every day in New York. Can we trade?

I silently laugh because she is like a kid in a candy store.
No not yet, but I have them put up.

Will you try and stop doing the drugs?

I'll try.

That's all I can ask. Are you ready to go back down?

Not yet.