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Authors: Debbie Macomber

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“I wish Mom was here.”

“So do I,” Valerie said fervently. “Oh, Steffie, so do I.”

 

Valerie didn’t see Colby for several days. Four, to be exact. As her father’s health improved, she spent less and less time at the hospital, therefore decreasing her chances of casually running into him. She was working out of the house, and that helped. Being in a familiar place, doing familiar tasks, allayed her fears and tempered her frustrations.

She knew she should think about returning to Texas. The crisis had passed, and by remaining in Orchard Valley she was creating one of a different sort. CHIPS, Inc., needed her. Rowdy Cassidy needed her. She’d already missed one important business trip, and although Rowdy had encouraged her to stay in Orchard Valley as long as necessary, he’d also let her know he was looking forward to her return.

Valerie had almost run out of excuses for staying in Oregon. Her father was going to be discharged in record time and Valerie, with her two sisters, planned a celebration dinner that included Colby.

She was surprised he’d accepted the invitation. Surprised and pleased. She was hungry for the sight of him. He was in her thoughts constantly, and she wondered if it was the same for him.

All afternoon, she’d been feeling like a schoolgirl. Excited and nearly giddy at the prospect of her father’s homecoming—especially since Colby would be driving him back.

Norah had been in the kitchen most of the afternoon, with Stephanie as her assistant. Since Valerie’s culinary skills were limited to salad preparation and napkin folding, she’d been assigned both jobs, along with setting the table.

“What time is it?” Steffie called from the kitchen.

Valerie, who was carefully arranging their best china on the dining-room table, shot a glance at the grandfather clock. “Five.”

“They’re due in less than thirty minutes.”

“Do I detect a note of panic?” Valerie teased.

“Dinner isn’t even close to being done,” Steffie told her.

They’d chosen a menu that included none of their father’s favorites. David Bloomfield was a meat-and-potatoes man, but that was all about to change. Colby had been very definite about that. From now on, David would be a low-cholesterol-and-high-fiber man.

“The table’s set,” Valerie informed the others. As far as she knew, it was the first time they’d brought out the good china since their mother’s death. But their father’s welcome-home dinner warranted using the very best.

Fifteen minutes later, Valerie glanced out the living-room window to see Colby’s maroon car coming down the long driveway. “They’re here!” she shouted, hurrying to the front porch, barely able to contain her excitement.

This moment seemed like a miracle to her. She’d come to accept that she was going to lose her father, and now he’d been given a second chance at life. This was so much more than she’d dared hope.

Steffie and Norah joined her on the porch. Colby climbed out of the car first and came around to assist David. It was all Valerie could do not to rush down the steps and help him herself. Although her father had made phenomenal progress in the eight days since his surgery, he remained terribly pale and thinner than she’d ever seen him. But his eyes glowed with obvious pride and satisfaction as he looked at his three daughters.

He turned to Colby and said something Valerie
couldn’t hear. Whatever it was made Colby’s eyes dart toward Valerie. She met his gaze, all too briefly, then they looked hurriedly away from each other, as though embarrassed to be caught staring.

“I’m afraid dinner’s not quite ready,” Norah said as Colby eased David into his recliner by the fireplace.

“I’ve been waiting two weeks for a decent meal,” David grumbled. “Hospital food doesn’t sit well with me. I hope you’ve outdone yourself.”

“I have,” Norah promised, smiling at Valerie. Their father wasn’t expecting poached salmon and dill sauce with salad and rice, but he’d adjust to healthier eating habits soon enough.

“Can I get you anything, Dad?” Valerie asked, assuming he’d request the paper or a cup of coffee.

“Walk down and see if the Howard boy is still in the orchard, would you, Val?”

“Of course, but I don’t think you should worry about the orchard now.”

“I’m not worried. I just want to know what’s been going on while I was laid up. I promise I’m not going to overdo it. Colby wouldn’t let me. I tried to die three times, but he was right there making sure I didn’t. You don’t think I’d want to ruin all that work, do you?”

Valerie grinned. “All right, I’ll check and see if the foreman’s still around.”

“Colby,” David said, raising his index finger imperiously, “you go with her. I don’t want her walking in the orchard alone.”

The request was a shamefully blatant excuse to throw them together, but neither complained.

Colby followed her out the front door and down the porch steps. “You don’t need to come,” she said, looking up at him. “I’ve been walking through these orchards since I was a toddler. I won’t get lost.”

“I know that.”

“Dad was just inventing a way for us to be alone.”

“I know that, too. He told me while we were driving here that he intended to do this.”

“But why?”

“Isn’t it obvious?”

“Yes, but…” Her father had hinted more than once that he anticipated a prompt wedding between her and Rowdy Cassidy. He’d apparently dropped the idea of her marrying Colby—so did he want her to clarify that in person? He seemed downright delighted at the prospect of Rowdy as a son-in-law, talking about her marriage as if it were a foregone conclusion.

“How have you been?” Colby asked. They strolled in the late-afternoon sunshine toward the west side of the orchard, where the equipment was kept. There was a small office in the storage building, as well, and if Dale Howard was still in the orchard that was the most likely place to find him.

“I’ve been fine. And you?” Valerie could tell him the truth about her feelings or she could tell him a half-truth. She chose the truth. “I’ve missed you.”

Colby clasped his hands behind his back, as she’d
seen him do before. It might have been wishful thinking on her part, but Valerie thought he did so in an effort to keep from touching her.

“I understand your boss is calling you every day,” he said stiffly.

“I understand you took Sherry Waterman out to dinner this week,” she retorted.

“It didn’t help,” he muttered. “The whole time we were together I kept thinking I’d rather be with you. Is that what you were hoping to hear?”

Valerie dropped her gaze to the dirt beneath her feet. “No, but I’ll admit I’m glad.”

“This isn’t going to work.”

How rigid his words sounded, as though he was holding himself in check, but finding it more and more difficult. “What isn’t?”

“You…being here.”

“Here? You didn’t have to come with me! I’ve already explained that I’m perfectly capable of finding my way—”

“CHIPS stock went up two dollars a share last week.”

Colby was leaping from one subject to the next. “That’s great,” she said cautiously. “I’m sure Rowdy’s thrilled.”

“You should be, too.”

“As a stockholder myself I am, but what’s that got to do with anything?”

“Houston is where you belong, with Rowdy Cassidy and all his millions.”

Rowdy had been telling her the same thing. Not in
quite the same words, but he wanted her in Texas. With him. Not a day passed that he didn’t let her know how much he missed her. Rowdy wasn’t romantic; fancy words weren’t his forte. He was as straightforward as Valerie herself. He missed her, he said, missed the time they spent together and the discussions they’d shared. He hadn’t realized how much until she’d left.

“When are you going back?” Colby demanded.

Valerie understood that this was the whole purpose of their being alone together. This was the reason he’d fallen in with her father’s schemes and had walked in the orchard with her. He wanted her out of Orchard Valley and out of his life.

“Soon,” she promised, and her voice cracked with pain. The intensity of it took her by surprise; embarrassed, she increased her pace to a half trot, wanting to escape.

“Valerie.” His voice came from behind her.

“No, please… You’re right. I’ll—” She wasn’t allowed to finish her thought. Colby caught her by the upper arm and turned her to face him, bringing her into his warm embrace.

He took her wrists and placed them around his neck as though she were a rag doll, then circled her waist with his arms and brought her tight against him. Before she had a chance to catch her breath, his mouth was on hers.

Valerie felt as though she’d drown in the sheer ecstasy of being in his arms again. It wasn’t supposed to be like this. It wasn’t supposed to feel so right, so
good. His mouth was eager and she opened to him as naturally as a flower to the sun.

She clung to him, and then he suddenly jerked his head away. Valerie pressed her face into his shoulder and shuddered. She might’ve been able to forget him, forget these feelings, if he hadn’t kissed her again, if he hadn’t taken her into his arms.

“Valerie, can’t you see what’s happening?”

She nodded. “I’m falling in love with you.”

“We can’t let this continue.”

“But—”

“Are you willing to risk everything we’ve both worked all our lives to achieve? Are you going to change, or do you expect me to? The fact is, you know that
neither
of us wants to give anything up. So we’ve got to put an end to this. Because, Valerie, we have nothing in common.”

Offhand, Valerie could think of several things they had in common, but she didn’t mention them. There was no point. She understood what Colby was saying. If they went on as they were, it would lead to the inevitable, and they’d be so deeply in love that they’d forget what was keeping them apart. They’d choose to forget that Valerie had a brilliant career waiting for her back in Houston. They’d choose to forget that Colby wanted a woman who’d be a dedicated homemaker. They’d overlook even the most obvious differences. For a while, their love would be enough, but that wouldn’t last, not for long.

“It’s time to go back,” Colby said, releasing her.

“Dad won’t be worried.”

“I’m not talking about your father. I’m talking about you, Valerie. Go back to Texas,” he said, his dark eyes holding hers, “before it’s too late.” He turned and walked away. It was the second time he’d pleaded with her to leave, and this time hurt even more than the first.

Eight

“C
olby’s taken Sherry Waterman out three nights in a row,” Norah said casually over a cup of coffee Saturday morning. “They’ve gone out every night since Dad’s been home.” She nibbled her toast, but her gaze managed to avoid Valerie’s, as though she felt guilty about relaying the information.

“I assume there’s a reason you want me to know this.”

“Yes,” Norah murmured. “Sherry was at the hospital, and we had a chance to talk. She says she can’t understand why Colby keeps asking her out. The spark just isn’t there. They enjoy each other’s company, but they’re never going to be more than friends. It almost seems as if Colby wants to make it something it’s not.”

“Perhaps Sherry’s reading more into the situation than is there.” Valerie didn’t actually believe that, but she felt compelled to suggest it. She knew exactly what Colby was doing—escaping her, fighting everything he felt for her.

“Sherry realizes Colby’s in love with someone else, and she also knows he’s fighting it.” Norah’s words were an eerie echo of her own thoughts. “It’s you, isn’t it, Val? Colby’s in love with you.”

“I can’t speak for him,” Valerie insisted, munching furiously on her toast.

“Do you love him?”

She gave a careless shrug and answered the question with one of her own, always a good business move. “What do I know about love?”

“You know enough,” Norah argued. “Please, do everyone a favor and put the poor guy out of his misery.”

“How would you suggest I do that?” Valerie asked, genuinely curious. She was miserable, too, but no one seemed to take
that
into consideration. In other circumstances, she would’ve talked to Steffie, but her middle sister was obviously having relationship problems of her own—not that she was forthcoming with the details.

“For the love of heaven,” Norah cried, “just marry him. He’s crazy about you. Any fool can see that, and you’re in love with him, too.”

“Sometimes love isn’t enough.”

“Yes, it is,” Norah insisted.

Perhaps to Norah, who was young and idealistic. But there were too many complications Valerie couldn’t afford to ignore in her relationship with Colby. Besides, he’d been pretty explicit about wanting her to leave.

“I think you should quit your job, move back home and marry Dr. Winston,” Norah said decisively.

“And do what?” Valerie asked. “Take up politics? Learn to knit? If I was
really
lucky, I might find some job in town that’s about a tenth as interesting as the job I have now. Listen, I’ve been an active businesswoman for the past eight years. Do you honestly think I’d be happy sitting at home knitting sweaters for the rest of my life?”

“You would eventually. It’ll take a little adjusting, that’s all.”

“Oh, Norah.” Valerie sighed and gave her starry-eyed sister a pitying smile. “You make everything sound so simple. It just isn’t. Colby isn’t exactly pining away for me, not if he’s spending all that time with Sherry. If he wants me to stay, he’ll ask.”

“What if he doesn’t? Are you willing to throw away a chance at happiness because you’ve got too much pride? You should tell him you’re willing to stay,” Norah said heatedly. “Why does everything have to come from Colby?”

“It doesn’t, believe me. But it’s too late.”

“What’s too late?” their father asked from the kitchen doorway. He was dressed in his plaid housecoat, the belt cinched tightly at the waist. He ran a hand through his disheveled hair, looking as though he’d only just awakened.

Norah automatically stood and guided him to a chair.

“What are you two arguing about?” he asked. “I could hear you all the way in the back bedroom.”

Their father was sleeping downstairs because Colby didn’t want him climbing stairs yet. Although he hadn’t
complained, Valerie knew her father was anxious to return to his own room.

“We weren’t arguing, Dad,” Valerie said, paying no attention to Norah’s angry look.

“I heard you,” David countered, smiling up at Norah as she brought him a cup of coffee. “Seems to me I heard Norah suggest you should marry Colby. That’s what I’ve been saying for weeks. So has everyone else who’s got a nickel’s worth of sense.”

Valerie’s throat seemed to close up on her. “He has to ask me first. And…and you acted as if you felt Rowdy and I—”

“Phooey. Rowdy Cassidy’s a good man, but he’s not for you. If it sounded like I thought you should marry Rowdy, that was just to get you—and that stubborn doctor—thinking. As for Colby not asking you, ask him yourself.”

“Dad…” The list of objections was too long to enumerate. The best thing to do was ignore the suggestion.

“You’ve never been shy about going after what you want. I’ve always admired that about you. You love him, don’t you? So ask him to marry you—or at least to give a relationship with you a chance. You might be pleasantly surprised by what he says,” Norah told her.

“It wouldn’t work,” Valerie said sadly. “Colby’s as traditional as they come. When he’s found the woman he wants to marry, he’ll propose himself.”

Neither Norah nor her father offered a rebuttal, which suited Valerie. A few minutes later she left the kitchen and went up to her room to dress, but she didn’t get far.
Sitting on the end of her bed, she closed her eyes and tried to think. Was she being unnecessarily stubborn? Was Norah right? Was she allowing pride to impede happiness? Questions came at her from all directions, and she felt at a loss to answer them.

There seemed to be only one way of learning what she needed to know and that was to confront Colby. For years she’d been finding solutions in all kinds of unlikely situations. It was her greatest strength in business; however, when it came to her own life, she drew a blank. There had to be an answer that suited them both, but she couldn’t figure out what it was.

 

She was obviously the last person Colby expected to see when he answered his door. Valerie saw the astonishment in his eyes and felt encouraged. She’d hoped to catch him off guard and had succeeded.

“Hello, Colby,” she said.

“Valerie…hello.”

She’d dressed carefully, taking time to select the perfect outfit for her purposes. Something that would remind him that she was a woman—but not a pushover. She’d chosen a lovely pale pink sweater dress Steffie had brought with her from Italy.

“Would it be all right if I came in for a few minutes?” she asked when he didn’t immediately invite her inside.

“Of course. I didn’t mean to be rude. I was writing.”

“Writing?” She followed him into his living room and when he gestured toward the sofa, she sat there,
hoping she appeared cool and serene. As though her visit was nothing more than a social call, when in fact the direction of her whole life depended on it. She had too much experience in negotiating to permit her feelings to show, but she was more nervous about this meeting than any business deal she’d ever accomplished.

“I’ve been working on an article for the
American Journal of Medicine,
” he elaborated. “The editor asked me six months ago if I’d be willing to contribute a piece and I’m only getting around to it now.”

Valerie felt a surge of pride. Colby had an impressive future ahead of him. The world would be a better place because of his dedication and caring. Their eyes met, and Valerie wanted to tell him how much she respected him, how proud she was of him, but she couldn’t. She didn’t want anything she said now to sway his decision later.

“I have something to ask you,” she said, standing abruptly. She glanced around, then sat down again.

“Yes?” His gaze fell to her hands and she realized she was rubbing her palms together. She stopped, embarrassed by this display of nervousness.

“The last time I saw you,” she began in a voice that was more hesitant than she’d intended, “you asked me to leave Orchard Valley.”

“Yes,” he said harshly.

“Why?”

“You know the answer to that as well as I do. Your father’s recovery has been a lot faster than we could’ve
hoped. Eventually you’re going back, so I can’t see any reason to prolong this…interlude. Texas is where you belong.”

“In other words, if a man’s going to hold me and kiss me, it should be Rowdy Cassidy.”

A brief flash of anger showed in his eyes, but was almost immediately quelled. “That’s exactly what I mean,” he returned smoothly.

“I can’t help asking myself something,” she said, her voice growing smaller despite her efforts. “Is my leaving what you
really
want?”

“What do you mean?”

“I could stay in Orchard Valley.” Her gaze clung to his, hopefully, eagerly. “This is my home. It’s where I was born and raised, where I attended school. Some of my friends still live here and I know just about everyone in town.” The words were rushed, practically tumbling over one another.

Colby breathed in deeply and seemed to hold his breath. His hands tightened into fists. “Why would you do that?”

Valerie had wondered how he’d respond. She knew what she wanted him to say—that he needed her in his life. Instead, he’d responded with a cruelly flippant question.

“Why would I stay?” she repeated slowly, her eyes never wavering from his. “Because you’re here.”

Her words were met with a brief, tension-wrought silence as though her frankness had shocked him. He looked away.

“Are you saying you love me?” he demanded in a tone that suggested this wasn’t what he wanted to hear.

“Yes.” Her own voice was husky with something close to regret. “All morning I’ve been wishing I’d dated more in high school and college, because then I’d know what to say. I’ve always been too…direct. I can’t help it. It’s just part of my nature.”

Colby didn’t respond, which made her hurry to fill the silence.

“This is when you’re supposed to admit you love me, too,” she prompted anxiously. “That is, if you do… I may not have been a Homecoming Queen, but I’m woman enough to know you care for me, Colby. The least you can do is admit it and let me salvage what little pride I have left.”

“Loving you has never been the problem.”

“Thank you for that,” she whispered.

“But love isn’t enough.”

“How do we know that?” she asked, although she’d said the same thing herself less than two hours earlier. “We haven’t even tried. It seems to me no one would’ve gotten anywhere in this world if they’d decided to quit before even trying.”

“You make it so tempting.”

“I do? I really do?” His words thrilled her. They gave her the first sign of encouragement since her arrival. “I was thinking…there are companies in the Pacific Northwest I could work for…companies that would be glad to have me.”

Colby stood and moved across the room. Not knowing what else to do, Valerie followed him.

“I think you should kiss me,” she said hoarsely.

“Valerie.” He turned as he said her name. He wasn’t expecting her to be so close behind him, because he nearly collided with her. His hands reached for her shoulders to steady her.

It was exactly what Valerie had hoped would happen. She moved automatically into his embrace, wrapping her arms around his waist, hugging him close. She raised her mouth expectantly to his and wasn’t disappointed.

With a groan, Colby claimed her lips. His hands were in her hair as he tilted her head back and kissed her with a hunger that left her breathless and weak.

“Valerie…no.” Reluctantly he stepped away from her, bracing his hands against her shoulders.

“But why?” she pleaded.

Deftly Colby stepped farther back, putting as much distance as possible between them. “What’s wrong with you?” he asked angrily.

“Wrong?” she repeated, still trapped in the excitement his kiss had aroused.

“Did you think coming here and seducing me would mean an offer of marriage? It’s not very original, Valerie. I would have thought better of you.”

“Seduce you?” Hot color sprang instantly to her cheeks. “I wasn’t…I had no intention—”

“Well, that’s the way it looked to me.”

If he was trying to upset her, he was certainly doing an effective job. She forced herself to take several deep breaths. “I didn’t come here to seduce you, Colby, nor
am I going to let you annoy me into starting an argument. I came because I had to know. I had to find out for myself if there was a chance for us. If not, tell me so right now and I’ll leave. I’ll walk out that door and we’ll both forget I was ever here.” She paused. “Is that what you want?”

He frowned, his expression fierce, but he didn’t answer.

“Say it,” she demanded. “Tell me you don’t want me. Tell me to get out of your life and I’ll go, Colby. I won’t even look back.”

She remained on the far side of the room, frozen in misery.

Still Colby said nothing. Nothing.

“You don’t need to worry about any unpleasant scenes. I’ll pack up my belongings, drive myself to the airport, and you’ll never hear from me again.” Her voice remained steady despite the hoarseness of pain.

Silence.

“Just say it,” she cried. “Tell me to go…if that’s what you want. But if you had an ounce of sense, you’d ask me to stay right here and marry you. You don’t have any sense, though. I know—because you’re going to do what you think is the noble thing and send me away. Well, I won’t make it easy for you, Colby. If you want me out of your life, you’re going to have to say it.”

“I might if I could get a word in edgewise.”

Valerie choked on a sob and swallowed the laughter. “I love you! Doesn’t that mean anything to you?”

His hands clenched into fists again, and his eyes, his beautiful eyes, didn’t stray from her.

“Say it!” she shouted. “Tell me you don’t want me. Better yet, tell me you’re crazy in love with me and that you’re willing to find a way to make everything right for us. Tell me that instead.”

He closed his eyes.

“This is it, Colby. If I walk out that door, whatever was between us is over. I’ll go about my business and you’ll go about yours. I refuse to waste the rest of my life waiting for you.” She dashed the tears from her cheeks with the back of one hand.

“You’ll always be someone very special in my life.” The words were so soft she barely heard them.

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