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Authors: Susanna Carr

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BOOK: Outrageously Yours
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“And the second rule...” He paused as if he wasn’t sure if he should continue. “If I’m going to publicly pretend to fall for you, the least you can do is let me catch you.”

Her mouth parted in surprise. He was worried she might reject him? Where had he gotten that idea? Had she hid her desire for him so well that he thought she found him repulsive?

“Do you agree?” He frowned when she didn’t respond. “Yes or no, Claire.”

“Yes.” The word dragged out of her throat.

He gave a sharp nod. She couldn’t tell if he was satisfied, relieved or resigned. “I’m going to kiss you now.”

She took an automatic step back. “Why?”

“Rule number one,” he reminded her as he cupped her face with his big hands.

“I’m just trying to figure out why you think this is the right time.” She was beginning to babble. “If we had used a spreadsheet, we could have staged a proper buildup and—”

He claimed her mouth with his. Claire gasped, her breath hitching in her throat as heat washed over her. This was no brushing of the lips or a gentle exploration. It was a hard and demanding kiss, as if he couldn’t wait another moment.

His touch broke the barriers she had carefully built. Claire returned the kiss with a hunger she hadn’t realized she had. The heat billowed inside her as she swiped the tip of her tongue into his mouth. His fingers tightened against her jaw as he captured her tongue and drew it in sharply. Claire felt the pull deep in her core and moaned with delight.

She wanted to be closer, to melt into Jason. She clutched the back of his head with her hands and greedily returned his kiss. Her skin felt tight and tingly as she ached for his hands to explore her body.

Claire had no idea how long the kiss had lasted when Jason pulled away slowly. She stared at him, gulping for air, not sure what to do or say. He looked as amazed as she felt. He dropped his hands as if her skin burned him.

Claire swallowed hard and reluctantly lowered her hands. She kept her gaze on his reddened lips. She couldn’t look him in the eye. She didn’t want him to see how much that kiss affected her. “I have to go.”

“You’re walking away?” There was an edge to his voice. “Again?”

“If I stay then we will have to continue this charade, and we don’t have a strategy in place,” she said hoarsely. If she stayed then she would cling to Jason and drag his clothes off. “Now is the time for me to leave.”

“Let me walk you to your car.” He bunched his hands at his sides and she knew he wasn’t going to touch her again. “And we will figure out our story along the way.”

* * *

M
INUTES
LATER
,
Claire walked into her apartment, wondering how she was going to get through the week when Jason could kiss like that. She flipped on the lights, closed the door and leaned on it. If she wasn’t careful, she was going to get addicted to his touch.

Her cell phone rang. Was it Jason? Her pulse galloped as she retrieved it from her purse. She felt a mix of relief and disappointment when she recognized her best friend’s number. Claire answered it quickly. “Kim?”

“I just got a picture of you and my big brother kissing,” her best friend said in a rush. “Tell me that it was edited.”

Claire covered her face with her hand. Someone must have captured them kissing at the party—and the photo had gotten around fast. Her friend lived across the state managing the Mountain Creek vineyards. “Where did you get a picture?”

“Oh, please. I still keep in touch with people in Woodinville.” Kim paused. “So it’s real?”

“Uh...yeah.”

“You and Jason?” Kim’s voice rose to a screech. “What is going on? When did this happen?”

Claire sighed. “It’s not what it looks like.”

“You always say that,” she said with a groan. “But this looks like a hot and steamy lip-lock. I swear he’s about to toss you over his shoulder and take you to the nearest bed.”

Claire’s legs wobbled as she imagined Jason doing just that.

“Wait...are you alone?” Kim misinterpreted Claire’s silence. She dropped her voice to a whisper. “Is he with you?”

If she was alone with Jason after that kiss, she would not have answered the phone. “No, nothing like that,” Claire said with a sigh. “He’s helping me with a project.”

“Don’t give me that crap. I know you’ve always harbored a secret crush on Jason. You weren’t obvious about it, but I could always tell what you were thinking.”

“I’m serious, he’s helping me out,” Claire insisted as she walked to her sofa.

“And Jason has had a soft spot for you since the day he met you,” Kim continued. “Sure, he ignored us all through high school but he did watch over us. I thought that was a phase, but when he needed help with the wine bar’s marketing, he didn’t go with the big advertising companies or hire a public relations firm. He decided his PR person was going to be you, and he didn’t consider anyone else.”

“I didn’t know that.” Claire slowly sat down. She had always assumed it was Kim who had pushed for Mountain Creek to hire her.

“But you’re familiar with Jason’s bad relationships. He doesn’t date indiscriminately anymore—and I’m using the word
date
as a euphemism—but he still doesn’t get serious with women. He only hooks up with the ones who just want a good time.”

“I know.” But didn’t anyone think that
she
wanted a good time? That
she
could have a strictly physical relationship? Some might call her a little uptight, but that didn’t mean she required every part of her life to be serious.

“You’re familiar with all this and you’re hooking up with him? Honestly, Claire, how dumb are you to get involved with him?”

Claire closed her eyes and gripped the phone tightly.

Kim gasped. “I’m sorry, Claire! I didn’t mean that you were dumb! You know I wouldn’t mean that!”

“It’s okay, Kim.” Her voice was steady.

“No, it’s not okay! You hate that word. I have no idea why I said it.”

“I’m not sensitive about it anymore,” she assured her friend. The word didn’t cause her pain. Maybe a pinch but that was all. “I know I’m not smart. I’ve taken enough tests to prove it.”

“That’s not true.” Kim’s tone was firm. “Those tests don’t tell the whole story.”

She still remembered the battery of tests she’d had to take as a teen at the neuropsychologist’s office. It had been exhausting, as if the tests had sucked out everything from her brain. It wasn’t at all like the standardized tests she had struggled with at school.

But what she remembered the most was the outrage her parents had displayed when they were given the results. Not only had it turned out that she had several learning disabilities, but she had also scored below average on the IQ test. Her parents refused to believe it.

“It takes smarts to overcome those obstacles,” Kim insisted. “It takes smarts to make something out of yourself. To be a business owner.”

“To hide my low IQ score,” Claire added. Her parents had insisted that the family hide the results. They didn’t tell the school, doctors and relatives about anything, even the learning disabilities. Claire had agreed. She didn’t want anyone to know that she was flawed and defective. Different.

Her parents had believed the tests were wrong and went to another expert and then another until they finally decided to abandon the pursuit for answers. They hadn’t liked what they had heard. In their opinion, Claire just needed to apply herself and work harder.

“They are your parents and I’m sure you love them, but they were wrong in how they handled the situation,” Kim said in a grumble.

“They thought it reflected badly on them.” That something was wrong with them and it had transferred to their child. They couldn’t have that. Her parents were considered geniuses in their field. Their computer programming careers and their identities were based entirely on their intelligence.

“That doesn’t matter. Couldn’t they tell how stressed you were at school? How quiet and withdrawn you became?” Kim asked angrily. “They wouldn’t let you seek out any resources that would have helped you.”

“You were the only person who knew. My parents didn’t even tell my sisters.” Some days the secret pressed against her, but she was still afraid to reveal it to anyone else. She gasped as a thought occurred to her. “Did you say anything about it to Jason?”

“Of course not. I made a pact with you that I take very seriously. No one knows about your IQ tests or that I lost my virginity to Dustin.”

Claire gave a sigh of relief and leaned her head back on the sofa. “Thanks for keeping the secret.”

“Jason won’t care about the tests, anyway. Why would he? They only mean something when you’re in school.”

“No, they mean something in the real world, too. My parents kept it a secret because they thought I would be treated badly.” They didn’t seem to realize they treated her as if she was permanently naive or hadn’t learned anything after middle school. “They believe people would take advantage of me because I couldn’t keep up with them.”

“That is simply not true!”

Sometimes she felt that they were right, though. “And I’ve learned that if you can’t keep up with the rock stars and the geniuses, you are just dragging them down. They will cut you loose and move on.”

“Are we still talking about your parents? They moved to Silicon Valley to work on their dream project and you wanted to stay here. Was there more to that?”

She didn’t feel like talking about it. “I don’t want Jason to know about my challenges,” she said quietly. “It will make him look at me differently. Worse, he wouldn’t trust my decision at work.”

“Not necessarily.”

She noticed Kim didn’t sound as certain anymore. “Let’s just keep it a secret, okay?”

As Kim quickly changed the subject, Claire decided that she could enjoy the week with Jason without revealing too much. He kept his relationships light. He didn’t require a brilliant woman at his side.

That was perfect for her. She could indulge in her fantasies with this fake fling and walk away unscathed. As far as she could tell, there was no downside to this strategy.

4

H
E
SHOULDN

T
HAVE
kissed her.

And he shouldn’t think about it anymore, Jason decided as he walked to Claire’s apartment the next evening. Eagerness pulsed through him and he tried to will it away. He gave an irritable sigh. He needed to focus on his job tonight. He also needed to complete this favor for Claire without adding any complications.

But if he had to describe Claire Miller, he would only use one word:
complicated
. She made his job easier but the woman was difficult and stubborn. She argued with him over the tiniest detail with no provocation. She questioned everything from his plans for Mountain Creek Wine Cellars to his enthusiasm.

He wasn’t used to it. In fact, he hadn’t realized how his friends and employees always agreed with him until he started working with Claire. He needed someone like her to push him. To confront and challenge him.

He privately admired Claire for standing up to him. He appreciated that she cared enough to speak her mind. She wasn’t worried about his displeasure when she pointed out why one of his ideas wouldn’t work.

But if she knew how much her opinion mattered to him, there would be no stopping her. He remembered how she used to get on his nerves when they were younger. She had been demanding and hard to ignore. And then, suddenly in high school, she had changed. She had gradually become quieter and withdrawn.

She wasn’t quiet with him anymore. Not since they’d started working together. He’d like to think that she was that way only with him. He wanted their relationship to be different from her other clients. He wanted to be special to Claire.

He scowled as he realized where his thoughts were leading. Jason knocked on the door to her apartment and waited. He absently rubbed his fingertips against his lips as he recalled the jolt of something fierce and mysterious rushing through him when his mouth touched hers.

Jason rolled his eyes. After that kiss, his mind was going to be focused on Claire’s mouth all night long. He should have considered that before he followed his instincts and kissed her. But he had been drawn to Claire. Driven, actually. It was new and different from what he felt with other women. He didn’t want to deny the building desire. Instead, he wanted to see how powerful it would become. He thought... Jason shook his head. That was the problem, he had not been thinking.

The door to her apartment swung open. Jason’s heart skipped a beat when he saw Claire. His fingers itched to sink into the straight blond hair that fell past her shoulders. The tresses would be soft and fragrant.

His gaze slowly traveled down the sleeveless dress that hugged her curves and stopped midthigh. Her legs looked longer in the barely there heels, and the claret-red shade of the dress highlighted her pale skin. The zipper that dominated the front of her dress grabbed his attention. It went all the way from her low neckline to the hem.

“Hi, Jason, come on in.”

He dragged his gaze to her face. Her smile surprised him. It was genuine and matched the gleam in her blue eyes. He’d assumed she would be nervous and uncomfortable after last night. That kiss had knocked him sideways but she had showed no reaction. Had she lost any sleep over it? Had she dreamed about it, or was he alone in that?

He stepped into her apartment and she closed the door behind him. His gaze rested on the front zipper. It was too much of a temptation. Blood roared in his ears as his body hardened. He wanted her to drag it down a little to show off her cleavage. He imagined jerking the zipper down fast, as if he was eagerly tearing off wrapping paper from a present. And now he was dreaming about catching the tab with his teeth and unzipping it slowly as he explored her curves.

Jason abruptly glanced around. He wasn’t going to look at that zipper again. He froze and took another look at her place, this time a little slower. Her home was an explosion of color. The throw rug was a splash of red on the wooden floor and her sofa was also bright red. There was a lamp with a bright yellow shade sitting next to a collection of the kind of glass art that seemed to be sold at every farmer’s market and specialty shop in the Seattle area.

Jason stared at the modern lithograph prints on the wall. They were vivid and sensual. He tried to align this apartment with the Claire who wore dark blazers and jeans and drove a beige car. The woman who was quiet and preferred the sidelines to the spotlight. It didn’t make sense.

“I was just finishing up something in my office,” she said as motioned for him to follow. “It won’t even take a minute.”

His gaze lingered on her swaying hips. Jason swallowed hard and bit his bottom lip. He hadn’t noticed how curvy she was before. His chest felt tight as his skin heated. Claire usually wore clothes that concealed her voluptuous figure.

She glanced over her shoulder, flipping her blond hair to the side. She stopped when she saw him staring at her dress. “Is what I’m wearing okay? It’s not too much?”

Too much? Where did she get that idea? “It’s perfect,” he said gruffly.

She gave a relieved smile. “I didn’t know what to wear to a tasting party for a charity,” she admitted. “I had to go buy this dress this morning. It’s not as if I have a set of party clothes for a last-minute invite. I’m only pretending to be a party animal. Miranda had to walk me through this one. She swore I needed to wear a bandage dress.”

Thank you, Miranda.
He wondered how the woman had convinced Claire to try something different. Claire was the most stubborn person he knew.

“By the way, I’m not happy with you,” she announced.

He should have guessed. “Why?” It had to be about the kiss. Should he mention that she had been with him every step of the way? That he had been the first to end the kiss, but that he had been reluctant to pull away? No, she didn’t need to know that.

“Seriously?” She stopped at her office door and put her hands on her hips. “I get a text from you first thing this morning saying that I have to attend this charity event. And then you don’t answer my texts or my calls.”

Jason gave a sheepish grin. “Sorry, I had forgotten my phone.” He had, in fact, avoided it and gone for a long run. He had been unable to stand still and decided to get out and exercise. It was the only thing that diminished his restlessness. He was exercising a lot lately. He had pushed himself hard on the trail, hoping it would clear his mind, but all he could think about was Claire.

“And then,” she continued, “I get a random text from you a few minutes ago stating that you will pick me up. No discussion, no asking, just telling me.”

“And the problem is?”

She tossed her hands up in the air. “I don’t work that way. I need more notice.”

“Why?” He gestured at her. “You’re dressed, ready and available.” She had exceeded his expectations. He knew he was going to fade into the background with his light gray suit and white button-down shirt. All eyes would be on her, and he looked forward to seeing that happen. Would she try to hide or would she enjoy the moment?

“You will never understand.” Claire gave an exasperated growl and swung the door open to her office. Jason blinked when he saw the white walls and utilitarian office furniture. While her apartment was vibrant and homey, her home office was devoid of color. The walls were filled with whiteboards and calendars. Everything on her desk was in place. There wasn’t a sticky note on the big computer screen or a forgotten coffee mug off to the side. It was all very orderly and precise.

“What is this?” he asked as he cautiously stepped into her office.

“The command center of my social media services,” she explained as she went to her chair. “I just need to send off an email and then we can go.”

He was impressed. He couldn’t remember putting this much effort into anything he had done. Jason was aware that he had been coasting for a few years. He was resting on his reputation as the golden boy. He had also created a job in his family business that played up his strengths. But he also couldn’t remember enjoying working on a project so much that he was willing to put in the hours that Claire did.

“Okay,” she said as she typed something on her keyboard and began to shut down her computer. “I’m ready.”

He spotted the whiteboard designated to Mountain Creek Wine Cellars. The strategy they had argued over and mapped out was written down step-by-step. “You put a lot of time into creating this flowchart.”

“It’s how I work best,” she said as she rose from her chair. “I should make a flowchart for Operation Fake Fling.”

He cast her a sidelong look. “I’m not calling it that.”

“Just as I suspected.” She crossed her arms. “What would you prefer we call it?”

He wanted to call it a trial run. An experiment before they admitted their attraction and fell into bed. Jason wanted to go after Claire and explore the heat that sizzled between them, but she had shown no interest in that.

The kiss had given him hope, but hope, he reminded himself, was a dangerous thing. It made him forget that he needed Claire in a professional capacity. But he was willing to forget about all that at this moment if it meant one more kiss. One more touch. Just more.

Jason forced his attention back to the whiteboard. “Why do you need to work like this? You don’t have to do everything step-by-step in chronological order. I’m sure we could knock off a few steps.”

Claire rushed over to the board, her arms outstretched to block him. “Don’t touch a thing, Jason. This is a system that I’ve perfected over the years.”

It was tempting to tease her and pretend to erase the board with the sweep of his arm but it was obvious how protective she was of her work. “You don’t always need a system. Take last night. We improvised and it worked out fine.”

“Just because it worked once doesn’t mean it’s going to work every time.”

“Claire, in case you haven’t noticed, I’m not as studious as you are.”

Claire’s mouth fell open. “Studious?”

When he bumped into her occasionally at the coffee shop, she was reading one business book after another. She was always taking notes when they had meetings and had fully thought-out presentations. He remembered she had been like that when they were younger, spending every spare moment on school projects.

She blinked and jerked her head back. “You think I’m
studious
?”

Jason gave her a curious look. “It’s not a bad thing.”

She moved her head as if she was giving herself a mental shake. “No, I know...I just haven’t seen myself that way.”

Considering her family, she probably assumed it was normal to study all day, every day. “I’m more hands-on. I need to figure things out as I go along.” He noticed Claire’s expression of horror at the prospect. “That’s why I decided you should go to the tasting room with me tonight and do a practice run.”

She gave him a skeptical look. “What kind of practice run?”

He spread his arms out wide. “Tonight I’m going to get you in the spotlight.”

Claire’s eyes widened and she hunched her shoulders. “No.”

He knew she would reject the idea out of hand. “This party is a small charity event. Lots of tech millionaires and philanthropists. No one from our group, unfortunately.”

“You’re putting me in a room with strangers? Who are going to talk about stuff I don’t know about?” Her voice went high. “What’s next? Are you going to make me give a speech in front of them?”

“No, you just have to stand next to me and smile. There are times when I will have to step away to work, but I won’t leave you if you feel out of your depth.” Jason curled his arm around her tense shoulders. “Trust me, Claire. I will take care of you.”

She stared at him with a blank expression but the tension in her shoulders eased. “Okay, Jason. I’m holding you to that promise.”

He tightened his grasp for a moment before he dropped his hand. He knew how much it cost Claire to give him her trust. To give him the control. He wasn’t going to blow it.

* * *

T
HE
CHARITY
EVENT
was a big success, Jason decided as he walked back into the tasting room. He didn’t like leaving Claire from time to time in order to handle a few glitches, but she understood he was still working. When he heard her lilting laugh, Jason turned and found her in the middle of the room surrounded by several men.

She was finally relaxing, Jason thought. At first she had drifted automatically to the corners of the tasting room, her back defensively against the wall. He also noticed she had researched the charity that was benefiting from the party. What kind of person studied for a party? Claire Miller, apparently.

But now she was talking more and smiling. No one but him would notice her rigid shoulders or her nervous habit of rubbing her thumb against her wineglass. He wasn’t sure what it would take to make her completely comfortable. It was as if she was constantly worried she was going to make a mistake. He wished he had the right words to relieve her anxiety.

But right now she was the center of the universe for the men around her, he thought dazedly. She was a goddess among her disciples. Several men drifted over to her circle as if they couldn’t help themselves. Claire bestowed a dazzling smile on one man, who blushed from the attention.

Jason watched the group closely. He wasn’t jealous that a random guy made Claire smile like that. He didn’t do jealous. Claire obviously had a type and he wasn’t it. No big deal. She preferred the suave and wealthy guys. Ambitious men who wore designer suits and owned their own businesses. Men like Max Blair.

Jason scowled at the thought of him. He had looked up the guy Claire was working so hard to impress. He wasn’t proud of his need to research Max. He could say it was to help Claire and get this favor done quickly and efficiently. But the truth was that he had been curious.

He had no idea why Claire admired the man. Granted, the only things he knew about the man were what he had found on Max’s website, but he wasn’t impressed. The guy’s résumé seemed to contain mostly casual snapshots of him with Hollywood starlets and aging rock stars. The guy bragged too much. Jason was sure some of Max’s accomplishments were exaggerations. No, that wasn’t it, Jason decided. He wanted them to be untrue. He wanted his accomplishments to be just as good in Claire’s eyes.

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