Safe Landing (18 page)

 “Hey, so this is where you’ve been hiding.” Hank’s voice surprised me, and I dropped the piece of wood. He leaned into the closet and was too drunk to think it strange that I was standing inside it. His breath smelled like stale sewer water. Instinctively, I backed out of his stream of breath and bumped into the back wall of the closet. Being wedged between a wall and a drunken caveman was never a good situation.

“Silly me, I got lost on the way to the bathroom.”

His big feet stepped closer, and I held my breath to keep from turning green. “You know what this closet is?”

I shrugged. “A storage place for stuff?” My eyes darted past his shoulder to find my route of escape. It was like trying to find a way around a brick wall. Only there was no way to climb over this one.

His hands grabbed my waist. “This is the make-out closet.” His fingers tightened around me.

“Oh really,” I laughed nervously. “Maybe next time. I need to get going. My mom wanted me home early.”

“Home? No way. You just got here.” His thick chest started pressing against me.

My feet took several steps back but the wall stopped my retreat. The last thing I wanted was to be trapped inside a small space with him.

He leaned to kiss me and being drunk enough to only concentrate on one maneuver at a time, his grip on my waist loosened. I squirmed out from under his puckered lips and slid past him. He whipped around and had to grab the doorway to steady himself.

“Some other time, huh?” I ran to the front door and down the steps secure in the knowledge that his reflexes were too dulled to follow. Now I just had to worry about seeing him at school on Monday. Or maybe this whole night would be erased from his beer soaked memory.

Chapter 15

“You’re home earlier than I expected,” Mom called from the family room as I walked in. The poor, deluded woman thought I’d made new, real friends.

I paused in the doorway. Mom was sitting on the couch surrounded by her furry brood watching a black and white movie.

“They weren’t really my type of people.”

She looked over the back of the couch. “You’ll meet some people who are your type, I’m sure. Was Seth there?”

Seth had obviously caught her fancy. Unfortunately, he’d caught mine too. But now, of course, he hated me. “Nah, he doesn’t hang with these guys. And I told you, he has a girlfriend.”

A clinking noise drifted down the stairs. Mom twisted around. “What was that?”

I scooted to the stairs. “I’m sure it’s just the boys. Remember this old house is full of noises.” In this case, I was sure the noise was coming from an impatient, lovesick ghost. “I’m going to bed since Dad is coming early.” Now that I’d stopped insisting the house was haunted, Mom was no longer watching me with a worried expression. It was all pretty friggin’ ironic.

Sure enough, Sebastian was sitting in my room clanging my silver bracelet against the metal frame of my mirror. “It’s about time,” he said. “Well?”

“Good to see you too.” I plopped onto bed and was stupidly amazed that the movement on the mattress did not disturb his image. On the drive home, I’d gone over the scenario of breaking the news to Sebastian several times. I decided I would tell him and then prepare to duck and cover in case objects started to fly.

I sat up and looked at him. His dark eyes seemed to glitter with hope. “Sebastian, the diary is not there anymore. Emily must have taken it with her.”

He floated quickly across the room to the window. It seemed to be his favorite place in the house and that made sense. If I were trapped inside a house for eternity, I think I would find myself pressed against the window a lot too. My heart sank at the thought of it. The poor guy couldn’t get a break even in death.

“Are you sure you looked in the right place? Were you at the right address?”

“I’m sorry, Sebastian. The address was the same as on your envelopes. And there was only one closet under the stairs. I’m sure it was the right place. Several planks of floor were loose and I was able to lift them. Nothing there but dust and a piece of wood.”

He said nothing for a long moment. His image shrunk down some as he went deeper into his thoughts. All this time, all these years, waiting to discover if Emily had still loved him, and now, without the diary, there was no way to know. He would never rest. I was sad for him but not completely disappointed. It occurred to me that having Sebastian to talk to had taken my mind off of feeling sorry for myself so much.

“Sebastian, Emily’s granddaughter said her grandmother was very fond of you. I’m sure she loved you even after she left town.”

He laughed softly. “Fond. Fond is not love. Fond is what a gardener feels for his rose bushes or an artist for his color palette.” He vanished leaving a coolness in the air that felt like despair.

I scrunched myself into a ball and groaned as my tender arms tightened around my legs. Sleep came fast.

Chapter 16

While Saturday had swung like a pendulum between a high rating and a low, Sunday started out as a two and pretty much stuck there all day. Except when it sank to a mindboggling and rare rating of one.

It began when I trotted merrily down to Dad’s car only to discover that Cynthia had tagged along for the car shopping day. I smiled weakly at her as Dad nervously explained that she needed to stop at some furniture place near the beach to look for a certain coffee table. I didn’t respond and slid into the backseat of his car where I stealthily positioned myself so he could easily see my scowl in the rearview mirror but his little girlfriend couldn’t.

“Your mom seems to like her new job,” Dad said obviously trying to make me forget that he’d brought her along. Now he was using the
your
word to distance himself from Mom like she did with him.

“Yes,
my
mom does.” His gray-blue eyes flickered in the rear view as if I’d either pissed him off or hurt him with my sarcasm. I noticed his sideburns were now peppered with silver making him look older and Cynthia ridiculously younger sitting next to him. I started wondering if she really loved him. My dad was handsome, as far as dads go. He had a cool job, and he could crack great jokes, but I don’t think I could ever fall for someone who was so much older.

“I thought we’d look at a hybrid car. That way your gas bill will be low,” Dad said.

Cynthia turned around and flashed her straight, white teeth at me. “Plus, you’ll be doing your part to save the planet.”

My face tightened as I held back the evil smirk that wanted to erupt. “That’s me, Captain America, ready to save the planet.” Cynthia’s smile shrank to a stretched grin, and she turned back to the road. I glanced up at the rear view mirror. Dad’s eyebrows scrunched together with disappointment.

We drove in silence for awhile before Dad attempted another topic of conversation. “So how’s the new house and school?”

I had always been pissed that he had not insisted we stay in Boston. It was as if his family moving a greater distance away gave him the freedom he needed as a new bachelor. “My room is haunted by a heartbroken, 19
^th
century ghost named Sebastian.” I loved how nonchalantly I could say that knowing no one would believe me.

“Very funny, Brazil,” Dad said.

Cynthia, on the other hand, swiveled around under the shoulder belt and gripped the top of the leather seat with long, pink fingernails. “Is it really haunted? I mean it looks like it could be.” Her lashes were long and curled like she’d used one of those eyelash curler things. She blinked wide-eyed with interest at me. I could easily envision her sitting on a couch, painting her toenails, and watching one of those cable shows about some haunting in small town Iowa where the Catholic priest had to come in and exorcise the place because books were flying off the shelves.

“It’s definitely haunted. The guy was murdered by his uncle, and now, he is stuck between worlds.”

She twisted even further around. “I’d heard that that’s why they stick around. Some unresolved conflict.” Cynthia was totally into this. Dad looked ready to turn the car around and drop me back home.

“How’s the new school?” Dad broke in. “Make any new friends?”

I relaxed back satisfied that I’d made somewhat of an ass of Cynthia, at least in my Dad’s eyes. “Tons.”

“Great to hear.” He moved to turn on a music station which was probably his safest bet.

When we got out of the car at the dealership, Cynthia excused herself to restroom. Dad grabbed my arm and turned me toward him. “Brazil, knock it off.”

“Knock what off?” I asked innocently.

“You know what I mean. I know this is a difficult adjustment for you, but Cynthia and I are together. Your mom and I did not raise you to be rude.”

“Fine.” I pulled my arm out of his grasp. “But why did she have to come along today?”

“I already told you why.”

“Right, I forgot. The coffee table.”

His face melted as if when I said the reason out loud, it sounded just as ridiculous to him as it did to me when he stuttered it out this morning. Cynthia returned. We surveyed the lot, successfully dodging any pushy salespeople. There were no hybrids, so we got in the car and moved on. Dad turned the music up louder while we drove.

When the day crashes to a one, it is usually expected. But when something comes out of left field to blast it to a one unexpectedly, it takes time to register. Was it actually a one or was it something that would eventually fade to a two? In this case, it was a solid one for my dad. The jury was still out for me.

“Oh look,” Cynthia pointed to the side of the road, “a vegan, sushi bar.” She leaned over and put her hand on Dad’s shoulder, and I could swear he pulled it away slightly. “That reminds of that little place we found when we were in Hawaii two summers ago.” Even though she seemed pretty clueless, Cynthia froze along with my dad at what she’d just said. Two summers ago, my parents were still married. Now it became crystal clear why my mom had not stopped him from leaving.

I glared up at the rearview mirror. After several minutes, Dad finally got brave enough to look in it. It is amazing how much emotion one can see in someone’s eyes without having to see the rest of the face. The agony and embarrassment in his eyes nearly cracked the mirror.

Cynthia shrank down the seat. I didn’t pull my gaze from Dad’s. It was like we were playing chicken to see who would look away first. He lost. I no longer wanted to look for a car. I just wanted to go home, sit on the couch with Mom, and put my head on her shoulder like I used to do when I was little and she read to me.

“I think that furniture shop is down the street,” Dad’s voice sounded strained as if his throat was sore. We pulled up to an expensive-looking shop. “Cynthia, why don’t you run in and check it out while Zilly and I wait for you.” When I was in trouble for being rude to Cynthia, I was Brazil. Now that he’s in trouble, it’s Zilly.

I totally did not want to talk about it, but it looked like I was trapped in the back seat and would have no choice except to listen to his lame excuses. They began as soon as Cynthia scooted her perky buns out of the car. She seemed more than happy to go.

Dad unbuckled his seatbelt and turned back to face me. “I’m sorry, Brazil. I know you didn’t realize that Cynthia and I were seeing each other before your mom and I split up.”

“It’s fine. I mean what does it matter now? It just explains why Mom didn’t try to stop you from leaving. It was you the whole time. You were the one who screwed things up.” His skin seemed less tight on his face as my words struck him. Embarrassment did that to people.

“You don’t know anything about love yet, Brazil. Things happen. Feelings change.”

Tears beaded on my lashes, and I was pissed that I was crying in front of him. “I know enough about love to know that Mom’s feeling never changed.” I sat forward. “Mom never changed. She’s just as cool and pretty as she ever was. You changed though. You decided that a pair of giant boobs and supple skin was more important than true love. What will you do when Cynthia sprouts crow’s feet? Scour the local high school for a mate?”

My words flew out at lightning speed, and there was no stopping them even though each syllable seemed to stab him like a tiny poisonous dart.

He spun around and jumped out of the car slamming the door so hard, the window slid down. I sobbed into my hands.

Cynthia came back tight lipped and sort of hunched over about five minutes after Dad had returned to the car in silence. No words needed to be spoken. The car shopping excursion was over, and for the moment, Dad and I had exchanged enough words.

Mom stepped out of the house and onto the driveway with a weak smile. “You’re back so

soon,” she said to me as I scooted past her and ran to the house. She stayed outside. I’m sure Dad relayed the whole thing to her but out of earshot of Cynthia so her dainty feelings would be spared.

I sat with my knees pulled to my chest on the living room couch switching channels crazily with the remote.

Raymond and Tyler ran downstairs with freshly washed hair and ironed t-shirts. “I told you they were back,” Raymond said as he ran to the door. Tyler followed but they both stopped hard when they saw Dad’s car leaving the driveway. Mom met their disappointed faces at the door.