The Rock Season (2 page)

Callie stuck her head in a few minutes later. “Closing time, Boss Man. You going over to open mic?”  I usually went over to the Bistro on Wednesdays with her and Schroeder for open mic night but it wasn’t in the cards tonight.

“Can’t. I have a date to get dumped.”

She rolled her eyes. “She’s a bitch anyway, McShane, and she’s got terrible taste in perfume. How can you stand to be near her? She smells like sweaty horses in a mildewed lavender oil bath.”

I barked out a laugh. “What a vivid description! Thanks, I’ll be picturing that over dinner.” I stood up and patted my pockets for my wallet, phone and keys.

“Over there,” she pointed to the shelf where I kept my stuff.

I gave her a sheepish grin. Callie was a tough cookie, but tried her best to take care of her bosses. Her boyfriend, Trevor, tattooed at a shop above the motorcycle dealer on Foothill and had obviously spent a lot of time on her skin as she was covered with the most exotic looking, colorful tattoos I’d ever seen. He’d given me a few, but with my dark skin, they didn’t pop like hers did. He was great with black and grey, though, so I had no complaints. My favorite was my chest piece that said “True Love Never Dies.” Yeah, so I’m a sucker for romance.

“Thanks, Callie. Oh, I wanted to ask you...I was wondering if you would be willing to trade some shifts with me? I’m going to take on a security gig at Shoreline this summer so I might need you to cover some days when I can’t be here.”

She frowned. “And when do you plan to sleep? Dude, you are the hardest working guy I know. Why would you take on something else?”  

I shrugged, checking the time on my phone. I had fifteen minutes to meet Hayley at Buon Appetito, an Italian restaurant she liked on A Street.

“I don’t know. A buddy of mine mentioned it, said it was not a bad gig because you get to hear good music, the pay is decent, and you can meet cool people. Plus, if you work certain shows, you can get into the ones you want for free.”

She thought about that for a minute and then smirked at me. “Is this why Hayley is breaking it off with you?”  

I laughed, rubbing my head. “I haven’t even told her. She’s pissed I’m here so much and that I’ve been coaching the swim team at the twins’ school. Says I don’t have enough time for her.”

“I hate to say it, but she’s right, isn’t she?”  

I shrugged. “I guess. Maybe I just need something fulfilling. It’s been forever since I went to shows on a regular basis. When I was in high school and college, I was at shows every weekend, sometimes during the week, too. It kept me sane. I miss the music. And since Hayley hates the music I listen to...”

“You’re just now figuring this out? How long have you been seeing her?”  

I looked at the calendar and then back at Callie with a startled expression.

“Jesus, McShane! You don’t even know how long you’ve been dating her? I swear, if she doesn’t dump you tonight, you owe it to her to send her on her way. You deserve better. You deserve happy.”

I felt that hollow space in my chest grow with each word my friend and co-worker was telling me.

“I know,” I said quietly. I grabbed my things hurriedly from the shelf and moved to leave the office.

Callie stepped back to let me duck through the door. She looked up at me with a sad smile. “I’m sorry, McShane. I’ll see you tomorrow.” She grabbed me for a quick hug. She was a tiny thing, barely coming up to my chest. I patted her on the head, which always pissed her off.

“Get out of here, fucker,” she said in parting.

I checked in with Schroeder on the way out while he was counting the register. “I’ll see you tomorrow, man,” I said.

He nodded while counting to himself. I locked the front door behind me and pulled down the security gate. Downtown Hayward was making a comeback, but it still had a fairly high crime rate and since we had some valuable vinyl collections and vintage instruments as well as the rest of our inventory, our security needed to be thorough.

I practically ran to the restaurant, getting there only two minutes late. Hayley already had a table by the window when I arrived. She was dressed in a short, beige, knit dress that I knew from past experience was see-through. Her dark hair was flowing around her thin shoulders and her face was drawn tight. I hated to see the sadness and frustration in her eyes that I knew I was partially responsible for. I should have let her go after our first date. I knew even then we weren’t right for each other, but I was so damn lonely, it felt nice to have someone give a shit for a while.

“Hey,” I said with a smile and leaned over to kiss her cheek before sitting down.

She didn’t smile, just folded her hands in her lap. “Hi.” She took a sip of wine and I could see a slight tremor in her hand as she rested it on the table. I noticed her menu was closed and there wasn’t one on my side of the table.

“Did you order already,” I said, checking the time to see if I was later than I thought.

She shook her head. “No. I’m not really hungry. Look, Aaron,” she said and I exhaled. I wanted to make this easier on her. I reached across and touched her hand.

“Hayley, I’m sorry. I know I’ve been preoccupied and not there for you. I totally understand if you need to, you know...” I trailed off when I saw her expression switch from sad to guilty.

“Aaron, I’m seeing someone else. I should have told you sooner, but we haven’t really talked much lately-”

“We haven’t talked?! You were just in my bed a week ago! How long has this been going on?”  

She looked down at her hands, now back in her lap. “A little over a month. I met him at a conference. You were spending all that time with your brothers and I just needed, I don’t know...”

I wanted to be furious with her for cheating on me, but then is it really cheating when the person you’re involved with isn’t really involved with you?

“Hayley, forget it, ok? I’m sorry I couldn’t be what you needed and that you had to go elsewhere to get it. Let’s just call it a day?”  

I had to get out of there before I exploded. Her eyes went wide as I threw down some cash to pay for her drink. I pushed the door open and stormed down the street. I almost wished some dumbass would start something with me tonight because I would surely give it to them.

My parents owned a Victorian a few blocks up from the downtown area that had a large carriage house in the back with two apartments on top and Pops’ workshop underneath. I lived in one apartment, and the other was rented to a cousin from Afghanistan. My parents and my brothers lived in the main house with my two grandmothers. It was exactly as chaotic as it sounded; McShanes and Samadis living in imperfect harmony.

I needed to get into my place without drawing attention from my family tonight. I had a date with the heavy bag and weight set in my place that I did not want to be deterred from. Unfortunately, things were not going to go my way.

“What’s up, dickhead,” asked Patrick from my weight bench, mid-bench press. I heaved a huge sigh.

“Patrick, I need you to finish your workout and get out.” I went to the kitchenette and grabbed a bottle of water from the mini-fridge. I didn’t keep much food at my place and it’s not like I wanted to eat anyway. The grandmothers did the cooking in the big house and it was much easier to just go over there than try to fix something edible on my hot plate. And much tastier.

“Sure, let me just finish my set.” He could obviously tell that big brother wasn’t in the mood for a ribbing. Just then the door banged open and Thing 2 came barreling in.

“Are you finished yet, douchebag? I need to- Oh, what’s up asshole?”  

Asshole. Great. At least I wasn’t the douchebag in this scenario.

“The two of you have the filthiest mouths! Maybe I need to let Grandma McShane at you with her soap! Peter, you’re going to have to miss tonight. I need you guys out of here.”

He pouted from the doorway and stepped over to flop on my couch, obviously not getting the whole ‘get out’ vibe. “What’s the matter? Didn’t get laid tonight?”

 I threw my water bottle against the wall and water splashed everywhere. Both brothers’ mouths dropped open and they shot to their feet.

“Sorry, brother. We’ll, uh, see you at breakfast?”  

I put my hands on my hips, disgusted with my outburst and nodded to them. “It’s fine. I’m sorry, too. See you in the morning.”

I couldn’t let myself lash out at them. With our father being ill, I needed to be there for them. To be sixteen and watch your larger than life father quickly turn frail was unsettling to say the least. They needed me to be strong for them, not throw temper tantrums.

I turned on some Metallica and stripped down to just my boxers. I went over to the mat to stretch out, and then went at the heavy bag for a good long time. I elbowed, hit and kicked until my hands and legs were shaking. My frustration was at a critical point and I needed to let it go. Hayley was another disappointment, but I’d get over it. Just as soon as I got to the clinic and got tested. Fuck! Why the hell couldn’t she have just told me she wanted out before fucking someone else? Sure, I was religious with condoms, but things happen.

As angry as I was, I couldn’t be angry with her for long. She was just one in a line of wrong choices I’d made in relationships. I vowed she would be the end of that line. From now on, I wasn’t going to let my loneliness guide me. It was time I learned to be comfortable with myself before I got involved again. This concert season was hopefully going to at least bring me some peace in the form of good music. That and a bit of an escape from all the pressure.

Stevie

“I guess it’s the overalls,” I moaned to Maryland as we got ready for the show. The move took place yesterday with little fanfare. All of the furniture at the townhouse was Ben’s with the exception of my desk and comfy chair. The movers packed up my books, music, movies, clothes, and various other items. The settlement papers Ben left for me were on the table, signed, just as he’d asked. I honestly didn’t expect anything from him, but was glad he at least realized he had a financial obligation to his child. He set up a generous account for me to take care of necessary purchases to get the alien and me settled, and then set up a trust fund for the alien in the amount of 18 years’ worth of a substantial amount of child support. I couldn’t believe it! It was more than I thought he had, but then he came from money and probably still had his own trust fund in addition to the ridiculous amount of money he made. I guess the bottom line for him was that he didn’t want to be a father, but he didn’t want to be a deadbeat dad either. Whatever, I’d take it. I didn’t need the setup money. I had more than enough saved from the past several months living with him. I’d sold my own condo to move in with him and that money was sitting in a nest egg. It might be time for the nest egg to hatch, along with the alien. At this point I just wasn’t sure which would be more painful.

Now it was Sunday and Maryland and I were dolling ourselves up for the Priest concert. I was still a little shaky from the week’s events, but I was determined to have a good time. Once I heard Rob Halford wailing away, I’d be perfect!

“You two better get out of here,” my former student Kimberly said. She had been in my senior American Government class the previous year and was currently attending Chabot. Maryland often asked me for potential babysitters from my flock of sheep and after green-lighting it with their parents, I’d pass the info along to her. Maryland loved Kimberly and so did the girls. I was happy Kimberly was getting the money and the support. She was a great kid.

“Thanks for coming today, Kimberly,” I said, giving her a hug. The alien took that moment to kick and Kimberly got quite a surprise.

“Holy Cow! That little bugger is tough!”  

I smiled and ran a smoothing hand over her/his foot, which was still sticking out. “You bet! You’ll get to meet her/him in a few more weeks,” I said, trying not to freak out. Maryland grabbed my hand and gave a squeeze.

“You ready to rock our balls off,” she hollered.

“If you’re speaking figuratively, then hells yeah! Let’s do this!”  

We kissed and hugged Jenna and Serena, thanked Kimberly once more, and climbed into Maryland’s Ford Explorer to head on down the road to the show. Maryland turned on appropriate Priest tunes and we sang the whole way to Mountain View. We opted for VIP parking, naturally, and took our time getting up to the gates. I wasn’t moving quite as fast as usual. Maryland was pleased she didn’t have to jog like usual to keep up with my longer legs. At 5’2”, she was all curves and more curves. Not much leg at all. But her infectious smile and sensuality drew people to her, especially men. She had a great sense of humor, was fiercely loyal, and I thanked God every day she was my best friend.

“I’m glad we got seats in the 100 section and on an aisle, although it’s going to be quite a hike for you to the bathroom,” she said and I laughed.

“That’s alright. I’ll try to keep the water intake to just the necessary amounts. And don’t think you have to walk with me every time. I’m a big girl.”

She looked down at the alien pod and said, “Why yes you are!” We both cracked up and she shook her head.

“It’s just not fair how fucking hot you look! I swear you are even sexier now than before!”

I waved at her. “You’re just saying that because we’re both single now.” It was true. Maryland had been divorced for almost two years now, which was a struggle with two preschool-aged daughters. Luckily, her ex, Mike, made plenty of money, which he heaped on her and the girls. They’d had an amicable split and were still great friends. He was over a lot, taking care of the girls. He even bought a condo in the same neighborhood so when they started school they’d have less disruption going between homes.

Once we made it through security, we stopped to get her a beer and me some water. I was the designated driver tonight, something Maryland was taking advantage of since we wouldn’t be doing much of this for a while after tonight. We made our way to our seats, which were on the inside aisle on the left side of the stage. We had a great view for the show, something we demanded when buying our tickets! Gone were the days of lawn seats for us. We were high rollers now!

The opening band, Nonpoint, was just getting started and we immediately began rocking out. In between songs, I noticed Maryland getting friendly with the guys sitting next to her. After about three songs I needed to make my first pit stop so I told her I’d be back.

“I’ll go with you,” she said, but I noticed the guys were really checking her out. They looked cute. Young, but cute.

I shook my head. “Don’t worry. You need a refill?”

She laughed. “Not yet. Hurry back and be careful, Mama!”  

I waved and started to ascend the steps. I was doing pretty good until I got near the top. I was starting to breathe hard and I stumbled on the last step. Strong hands caught my arm before I face planted.

“Are you alright, Miss?”  

The warm voice startled me. I looked up, pretty far up, into fathomless, dark brown eyes set deep under heavy brows. I know I turned red and prayed the sky had darkened enough he wouldn’t see.

“I am! Thank you. That would have been bad,” I laughed, nervously.

He looked down at my alien pod and grew more concerned, his jaw muscle twitching. “Are you sure you’re ok?” He was still holding my arm, a fact we both realized at the same time. He let go hesitantly.

“I’m fine. I’ll be more careful next time.”

He nodded, gave me one last questioning glance, and then turned his attention to some already-wasted revelers spilling over into the aisle. He was incredibly handsome. He was what some might call exotic or striking. I called him right face, wrong time, and gave the little alien pod a rub.

I stepped away from him, not failing to appreciate his quick movement and commanding personality. God! How embarrassing! I really needed to be more careful! Perhaps this was a little late in the game to be taking the alien to a show. She/he had already seen/heard Soundgarden, Bullet For My Valentine, and Jack White. I hated to cut the season even shorter. Maryland and I both had eclectic tastes in music and always went to shows together, even if it wasn’t one of our own favorites. We just both loved the music and atmosphere. She loved getting out of the house and feeling the freedom of not being called ‘mommy’ for a few hours. I hoped I could emulate her good attitude toward being a great mom and taking care of myself.

I used the bathroom, which was always an adventure. Luckily the stalls at Shoreline were decent-sized so I could maneuver getting the overall straps down without getting wedged in. After using the facility, I went over to the snack bar for a sweet and immediately started to drool when I noticed they had Cracker Jacks. The girl gave me an odd look as I paid her for the bag and another bottle of water.

“This is the first bag we’ve sold,” she sneered.

I laughed and put it in my pocket. “Thanks! I’ll treasure it always,” I said sarcastically as I stepped away to make the long trek back to our seats.

At the top of the stairs, my savior was deep in conversation with a Mountain View police officer, his bright yellow windbreaker pulled tight across broad shoulders. I bit my lip and tried to slip past without him seeing me, but he caught my eye. Another inquisitive glance. I smiled hesitantly and then figured I better pay attention before I took a spill down the stairs this time.

Maryland had our neighbors in stitches when I came back. She hugged me and whispered in my ear, “They’re Marines! This is their first concert!”

We giggled together and I noticed the two of them lean toward each other, obviously trying to determine who had dibs on the vivacious brunette. They smiled politely at me when they noticed me looking and then winced when they noticed the pod.

I was used to that expression from single guys, especially young ones. While most married men would engage a pregnant woman in conversation and ask about her due date and what she was having, single young guys hurried away as fast as their little legs would take them. They must think pregnancy is like cooties. Plus, they just couldn’t handle the vaginal implications of childbirth.

Nonpoint finished up their set and we had a half hour before it was time for the Black Label Society. We opted to go up and try out their selection of snack bar foods. We were pretty well versed in the offerings of Shoreline’s eateries, but there were a few kiosks set up that looked interesting. We made our way back up the stairs and my savior was there with his hands clasped in front of him. His eyes bored into me, causing me to flush. I answered his gaze with a timid smile. Which caused his features to soften into a slight grin.

Maryland easily picked up on this exchange, since I craned my neck around to avoid breaking eye contact with him. When we were out near the snack bar she pulled on my arm.

“What was that all about? That man looked like he wanted to eat you alive!”  

I barked out a laugh. “No way! He caught me when I went by before as I stumbled, that’s all. He’s probably just thinking I’m an idiot for bringing my alien to a show.”

Maryland always cracked up when I referred to him/her as my alien. The first time she saw her/him roll over in my belly she completely understood.

“Honey, that look did not say ‘idiot alert.’ He looked as though he had seen a goddess for the first time and was seconds away from dropping to his knees in worship. Which I wouldn’t mind seeing one bit. He’d look damn fine on his knees.”

We laughed hysterically all the way to the counter and could barely breathe in order to speak and ask for our food.

I opted for the chicken strips and a Sprite, knowing anything I ate was going to give me major heartburn tonight and not caring one bit. Maryland ordered the same and beer number two. We made our way over to a picnic table, just in time for my savior to walk by with another security guy. He caught my eye and nodded. I could only stare with a stupid smile on my face.

“Dayam, would you check out the goods on that guy! Oh, Stevie baby, if only this were the time and place for you to be getting back out there!”  

I sighed. “I know. Somehow I don’t see him agreeing to a night of wild sex back at our place with me and my alien pod.” I sighed dramatically and turned to Maryland with a giggle.

She had gone serious. “Stevie, just because you are having this baby alone doesn’t mean you have to be alone forever. You’re going to find someone when you’re ready, I promise. Not like that frigid jackass. A warm, loving man who will appreciate you and your alien spawn.”

I felt a tear slip down my cheek, but I laughed. “I know, Maryland. I know. It’s just weird. I never saw myself in this situation at all! Not having a baby, not being without Ben having this baby. Not being without Ben! Well, maybe I saw that. It wasn’t really love. I can see that now. Someday, maybe...But it’s weird. For the first time in my life I can’t see the future. Not like psychic see, I mean I just can’t look forward and see like ‘Oh, yes, I’ll still be teaching at Paly, or yes, I’ll be getting married.’ Before all this I had a clear vision. Maybe the alien is sending out gamma rays to interrupt my brain waves or something.”

Maryland was taking a huge bite of her hamburger when I said this and she almost spit it out. “No, hunneh. Ith called pwegnant bwain,” she said with a mouth full of food. I cracked up and handed her a napkin. She winked at me and said, “Honestly, Stevie. You’ll see so much more clearly after about eight weeks of mommyhood. By then you’ll have breastfeeding down, the little alien will be sleeping longer periods...You’ll be able to make plans then.”

I laughed, hoping she was right.

We finished our food quietly. Then the people watching really got good and we were laughing hysterically again. On the way back to the seat, we paused several times to take pictures of each other and get strange folks in the background. We’d almost reached our stairs when I turned my back to the stage and said, “Here, get this one.” Maryland wasn’t looking at me, though.

That warm voice spoke near my ear. “Would you like me to take one of both of you,” he said softly.”

I turned quickly and lost my balance. His arm came around my back to steady me and I was back to staring again.

McShane

“I am so sorry. I’m not usually this bad of a driver,” she said with a nervous laugh, pointing to her swollen belly. Like an idiot, all I could do was stare at this beguiling creature in wonder. Like what the hell was she doing here? Why didn’t she have a ring on her finger when she was obviously pregnant? Why was she so goddamn beautiful?

“Thank you,” her voluptuous friend said, handing me her iPhone. “Here, turn sideways so the alien pod is showing.”

I barely stifled a laugh and held the camera up to take the picture, but I couldn’t get a good enough picture. I took about four or five shots before the redhead started to frown.

“Is there a problem? Do you need us to move?”  

I shook my head. “No, it’s ok. I just couldn’t do you justice,” I said before I could shut my stupid fucking mouth. Just then her face flushed again, like before, and I found myself watching the redness spread down her neck and into the- “Here,” I said, quickly shoving the phone back to her friend as the lights dimmed in time for the opening music of Judas Priest’s set to start. I took the goddess by her elbow and said, “Let me show you to your seat. It’s going to get really dark.”

She looked up at me with wide, blue-green eyes, and nodded, biting down on her lower lip.

I turned on my flashlight, illuminating the way for her, and led her gently down the concrete steps. I could feel her eyes on me and her friend was giggling on my other side. I felt like an idiot, but I was completely mesmerized by this woman who I absolutely had no business touching or looking at. I swallowed hard just as her friend said, “This is us.”