Authors: Courtney Noel
: Healing -->
So I made it through my first night with Kade in the room across from me without tons of mishaps, so that’s good. Although, I still can’t figure out what he meant about the getting fat situation. I mean, he’s a guy; he’s not supposed to be that deep. No guy is that sensitive. It’s fuckin’ weird. All guys just punch each other and that’s their apology. NO guy ever, ever, EVER says the words “I’m sorry.” NEVER. Not once in their lives will they admit they’re wrong and then say they are sorry. That’s just not in their vocabulary. No guy is that sensitive unless they are gay. Don’t get me wrong, I have nothing against gay men. I think they are the bravest people out there. Guys just don’t get sensitive. Yes, I am stereotyping. But it’s a fucking true stereotype. And don’t say your boyfriend is sensitive, because that is bullshit. “Oh don’t worry, my boyfriend totally understands me.” Oh my gosh that’s such bull shit, and if you think it isn’t, you will never have success with a guy. Boys can be sweet and everything, but never think they don’t talk about how big your tits are with their guy friends. They do. And if you think they don’t, you’re fuckin’ crazy. Okay. Sorry for ranting. Whatever, I’m just going to shrug sensitive bullshit Kade off my shoulders.
So anyways, today my best friend, Chasity, is coming over, and I’m super excited. We’ve been best friends since fourth-grade. She’s my other half and is the most amazing person I have ever met. She’s has the worst dry humor that always and makes me crack up but other people think it’s just weird. Whatever, I don’t care. She’s my best friend. We are probably just going to hang around the house, jump on my trampoline, or maybe watch a couple movies. We’re the total opposite in when it comes to taste of in movies. I love romantic comedies and drama and she could punch herself in the face while watching some crap like that. She loves horror movies, but I promise I will pee myself if I watch one. So we usually settle on comedies.
The real reason Chasity is coming over though, is to gaze and drool over Kade while I gag. Believe it or not, the sensitive dick living upstairs is the hottest guy in our senior class. Yes, that’s an oxymoron. That is the only thing English class has taught me.
Now don’t go all, “Wow, so he’s the hottest guy? They are obviously going to fall in love.” Yeah, creepy how I know what you’re thinking, right? Anyways, see In my opinion the hottest guy in the senior class would probably be Steven Smith. He has blonde hair, green eyes, and a kick ass tan. Like the total stereotypical California dude can prove he’s the hottest guy in the school, because all the girls call him “Sexy Smith.” Therefore, I just proved that Kade is NOT the hottest guy in the senior class. He only has brown shaggy hair and green eyes and a tan. In my opinion, if he does not have the blonde hair, he does not deserve to be called the hottest guy in school.
I walk down the stairs and into the kitchen to get breakfast. I’m hungry and still kind of tired. I look in the main cupboard trying to decide what to have for breakfast. I’m not a big breakfast person. I don’t like pancakes or waffles, and I have to be in the mood for eggs. Basically, my breakfast usually consists of nothing, or peanut butter toast and oatmeal. I take the old-fashioned oats out of the cupboard and pour them in a green glass bowl. I fill the bowl with water and then pop it in the microwave for one minute. In the meantime, I put a piece of bread in the toaster oven.
“Hey.” I jump and turn around as fast as I can. He’s wearing black and white plaid pajama pants and a white t-shirt. Breathe, Becca, breathe. In and out.
“Don’t sneak up on me like that,” I say as I turn back around to take my toast out of the oven. I walk over to the second pantry and get crunchy peanut butter and honey.
“I didn’t mean to scare you,” he laughs.
“I’m just used to being the only one up early on the weekends.” I walk over to the silverware drawer and grab a butter knife. I spread the peanut butter and honey across my piece of toast.
“Can you share your mornings with me?” He looks at me with dark eyes.
“Um. Yeah. I guess.” I shrug. No big deal. I totally forgot about my oatmeal, the timer has probably been going off for the past forty seconds. I walk over to the microwave and grab my bowl.
“Oatmeal?” He asks.
“Yeah,” I say. He really talks too much. Looks like I’m going to have to get up even earlier to get some peace and quiet in this house.
“I love oatmeal,” he says. Cool story bra; tell it again.
“Good for you. There’s some in the cupboard if you want some. Then there’s brown sugar in the pantry. Help yourself,” I say then take my oatmeal and walk into the living room and turn on the TV. I turn on my phone, since I keep it off during the night so no one bothers me and text Chasity.
What time will you be over?
As soon as I take a shower
Okay so see you in like three hours?
Don’t judge me. It’s rude.
Just get over here.
Need some saving from the parents?
More like the Kade.
Don’t worry, I’ll totally take care of that. ;)
I barf a little in my mouth then don’t respond. I can only think of sending her the middle finger back, but I don’t think she’d appreciate that very much. I flip through the channels on TV and settle for one of my favorite movies called The Lucky One. I told you, I’m a sucker for romantic dramas. Plus, Zac
Efron plays a Marine in the movie. My grandpa was a Marine, so I have a special place in my heart for the movie. Kade just comes over and sits next to me, and watches the movie. In silence for the first time, like ever. I don’t know how he gets other guys with that big ass mouth.
“You’re sitting a little too close for my liking,” I say.
“There’s no such thing as too close in my dictionary.” He winks. I pretend to gag.
The doorbell rings two hours later. My parents just woke up and my mom is still in her footie pajamas. My dad, just like Kade, is in plaid sweatpants but wearing a grey t-shirt.
“What took you so long?” I pull Chasity in the house, wave goodbye to her mom, then slam the door. I take her stuff out of her hands and run to my bedroom, taking the stairs two by two.
“Beauty takes time.” She pushes me when she enters my room. I put her stuff on the floor and then jump on my bed. She sits down next to me.
“So, where is he?” It’s already starting.
“I don’t know.”
“How do you not know?” She slaps my arm.
“Because I don’t stalk him? It’s not important to me to know where he is at all times. I mean, we live in the same house. It’s not like it would take hours to find him if I needed him.” I get up and walk over to my iHome and turn on some music.
“Let’s go find him!” Chasity gets off the bed and runs out of the room. I quickly shut off the music and catch up with her. When I get out of my room and into the hallway, there they are. Already. Chasity is looking up, gawking at Kade. Kade looks at me when he hears my room door open.
“Hi.” He says.
“Hey,” I say.
“Who’s this?” He points to Chasity.
“My best friend, Chasity,” I say. Then I take Chasity’s arm and start to pull her down the stairs. I want to jump on the trampoline.
“Becc,” Kade grabs my arm and motions me with his head into my room. The area where he’s touching my arm gets warm. My hands go clammy and my mind goes mushy. My eyes must have gone wide because he adds, “Can I talk to you for a minute?”
I look over at Chasity, she winks, then continues down the stairs. I walk into Kade’s room. Thankfully, he doesn’t close the door, knowing Chasity is out of ear shot.
“What?” I cross my arms over my chest and lean on one leg.
“I don’t want people to know about...you know...”
I stare at him with a blank look. “Um..no...I don’t know,” I say.
“Ugh. I don’t want people to know about how my parents can’t afford to live in the U.S. so I have to live with you.”
“Ooooooh. Gotcha. Okay cool.” I start to walk out of the room.
He grabs my arm and pulls me back to face him. “I don’t think you quite get it, Becc. Chasity knows now,” he says. He sighs then puts his hands on his hips.
Chasity? Being...a problem? I laugh. “Chasity is not a problem, Kade. She won’t tell anyone.”
“You have to make her swear.”
“Why, are you embarrassed that you’re living with me?” I give him a cocky smile.
“Living with you? Anyone would be embarrassed,” He says as he gives me a smile back. Then I walk out of the room. I walk downstairs and find Chasity getting cookie dough out of the freezer and putting them on cookie sheets.
“For your cookies? Always.”
“You know they aren’t ‘my’ cookies, right? It’s store-bought cookie dough.”
“What’d Kade say?” She ignores my cookie subject. I think she can tell I’m trying to get her to not ask what Kade and I talked about. It didn’t work very well.
“He asked me to ask you to not tell anyone that he lives with me,” I say.
“He doesn’t want people to know,” I say.
“It’s complicated. Ask him yourself,” I say kind of bitchy. Kade aggravates me. Any guy in general, though, aggravates me.
: Healing -->
Two weeks have gone by, and here I am loading up the car, getting ready to go on a twenty- two-hour drive with Kade, my mom, and my dad. This is going to be interesting. I get into the back seat of the car and slide into my normal spot. Kade slides in behind me and closes the door. I don’t think I can do this. Twenty-two hours with him? And my mom? And my dad? Nope. This is not going to work.
“Honey didn’t you hear daddy?” My mom opens the back seat of the car and looks at me.
“You and Kade are going to have to drive in Kade’s truck; we don’t have enough room in Dad’s truck for both of you and all of our bags. He’s already filling Kade’s truck with bags and everything we need, but he’s leaving room in the front seat for you.” What the hell? They want Kade and me to drive alone, for twenty-two hours? Yeahhh...funny story though... he drives me crazy.
“Oh, okay cool. So we’ll just follow you guys all the way to Idaho?” For the nerves I’m feeling right now, that sentence came out pretty darn good. Hopefully I seem relaxed. I get out of my dad’s truck and walk over to Kade’s. We bought him the truck for his seventeenth birthday four months ago. He loves his truck. It’s everything he asked for – blue, 4-wheel drive, and nice and intimidating. I open the shiny blue door and hop in the passenger seat. His truck is really nice with a good stereo and IPod player. The black leather seats are comfortable and have seat warmers if your butt is cold. Kade slides into the driver’s seat, looks at me, then puts the keys in the ignition.
“Want to plug your IPod into the stereo system?” Kade points to the stereo with one hand while keeping the other hand on the steering wheel. We just got out of the front gate of our community and it feels like hours have already passed. You can practically feel the awkwardness lingering in the air. I can just hear him telling himself to say something to break the silence. The front gate opens a little too slowly that I get impatient.
I don’t respond to him. I just reach for the white cord that connects my IPod to the car and play the playlist I made for the drive. I hope he’s not picky about music, considering I made this playlist for my enjoyment only. I was not aware I was going to play it for both Kade and me.
“Hunter Hayes. Nice,” he says as he bops his head to the music. Hunter Hayes. Gosh. I love the man to freaking death. He’s gorgeous and can sing beautifully. His music warms my heart and makes my head feel all fuzzy. “So are you excited for senior year?” Did he just ask me a question? I was not aware we are going to be talking on this trip. I’m not one for talking in the car. I just like looking out the window and watching the cars pass in silence.
“Yes, but no,” I say. I stare out the side window hoping he’ll get the message. The sky is perfectly blue with the bright yellow sun shining down on Kade’s truck. Gosh it’s so gorgeous. I love where I live.
“Explain?” Obviously, he didn’t get the message.
“Well, I’m sad it’s our last year at Dana, but I’m excited to start the next chapter in my life. I guess I’m scared, too,” I say. Like always...I’m scared. I’m always scared, and it’s getting really tiring.
“Of what?” He asks.
“I don’t know. Losing my best friend? Not staying in touch with her? Not meeting new friends at college? College being too hard? There are plenty of things to be scared of. Not seeing my parents every day? I mean, trust me, my parents bug the crap out of me sometimes, but I’m going to hate not seeing them every day.” This is the first time I look at him since he started the car.
“You’ll call your parents every day. And trust me, not even an earthquake can keep you and Chasity apart. You guys will text 24/7 and Skype every night.”
“I know, but what if she finds another best friend?”
“You know, she may find another best friend at the college she goes to, but that does not mean you will not also be her best friend.” He looks at me and my breath hitches. I look away from his deep green eyes and out the window trying to keep my breath steady. I look ahead and see my mom waving from the passenger seat of my dad’s truck. I wave back and put on a fake smile. The fact is, I’m suffocating under questions and emotions.
“And my parents are going to be sad that I’m gone. Why are they pushing me so much to go to college if all they’re going to be is sad when I do?” He just looks at me with no response. Like he’s trying to figure out where that question came from.
“You’re parents are going to be happy for you. That happiness will cover over the sadness. They’ll be proud more than anything, Becc.” There’s “Mr. I Always Have the Right Answers to Everything.”
“So what about you? Are you ready for the big senior year?” I look up at him. He has two hands solid on the steering wheel. He’s in-control and sure of his every move. I’m not a fan of driving with anyone besides my parents and Cynthia. I don’t trust anyone else behind the wheel, but he seems pretty comfortable and confident.
“Don’t remind me of school. It’s rude.” He chuckles to himself. “Besides, after this vacation we only have four days until our first day, so I’m trying to stay in the moment of summer as much as possible,” he continues.
“Ah, got it.” I nod.
“So, does Chasity have a boyfriend?” He tries to be all casual about it, but both him and I know he’s not being casual at all.
“Don’t even think about it,” I say as I point a finger at him. Not the middle one, but I thought about it.
“Ewww! No! Not like that,” he says back.
“Then what did you mean?”
“I don’t know. I’m just trying to make conversation, I guess. We’re going to be spending twenty-two hours in the same car; I don’t want things to be all awkward and silent,” he says. I rather drive in silence. That’s not going to happen though.
“Fine. No, Chasity does not have a boyfriend.”
“Do you?” I squint my eyes at Kade when he asks this. Who the heck does this guy think he is? He’s lived with me for like four days and he now seems to think he can get information about my love life when he wants it? Nope, that’s not going to happen. “What? I’m just wondering,” he continues.
“No, Kade, I do not have a boyfriend. I like being single. What about you, huh? Do you have a girlfriend, Kade?” I cross my arms over my chest and look over at him with a cocky look smacked on my face.
“Why no I do not, Becca, thank you for asking,” he says sarcastically.
“Oh really? How about a crush?”
“No one says crush anymore,” he responds.
“Fine. Do you like anyone, Kade?” I ask, making a heart with my hands and folding my bottom lip down, as if to say “aww how cute.”
“We sound like fifth graders. ‘Ohhh who do you like?’ ‘Oh I know someone who likes you! But I can’t tell you.’” He looks over at me and laughs.
“You didn’t answer my question,” I say as I look back at him and stick my tongue out.
“No I don’t have a crush nor like someone,” he says as he smiles to the road ahead of us.
“Oh! I got it. You’re in love with someone, right? Am I right? Yeah, I’m right, you might as well admit it now and save yourself from blushing hysterically.” I giggle to myself.
“No, I’m not in love with someone, either. What about you Becca? Falling in love with someone?” He turns the question right back on me.
“Are you mocking me?”
“You didn’t answer my question,” he says. Yep, definitely mocking me.
“No, not at the moment.”
“Oh, so you will be in love soon?”
“That’s not what I meant.”
“Ah, but that’s how I took it,” he says.
“Well that sounds like a personal interpretation; therefore, it is your own personal problem you took my ‘not at the moment’ the wrong way,” I say all smarty-like.
“You’re a smartass.”
“So are you,” I say giggling. He looks over at me. I don’t look away. But he has to; he’s driving. So he does. And I wish he didn’t.