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Authors: Darren Shan

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BOOK: Zom-B Gladiator
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And the sad look he flashes me is far more worrying than any threat he might have made.

We drive for what feels like twenty or thirty minutes. It involves a lot of zigzagging around crashed or abandoned vehicles, which slows us down. A few zombies hurl themselves at the vehicle every now and then, but they bounce off and are easily left behind.
Coley swerves on other occasions to deliberately mow down zombies that are in his path. He whoops every time he hits one, sometimes pausing to reverse over them, trying to squash their heads.

Barnes sighs and purses his lips with disapproval, but says nothing, letting Coley have his grisly fun.

The van finally draws to a halt and Coley kills the engine. Having checked the mirrors to
make sure the area is clear of the living dead, he hops out, trots round to the back and opens the doors. ‘Here, kitty, kitty,’ he purrs and reaches in for me. He grabs my feet and starts to pull me out.

‘Wait until I gag her,’ Barnes says.

‘Don’t,’ I ask him as he leans towards me. ‘I won’t bite, I swear.’

‘I believe you but I can’t take any chances,’ he says. ‘It won’t be for long,
just until we can set you down.’

Barnes puts the gag back in place and secures it. Then he nods at Coley, who happily hauls me out of the van. I land on the ground with a thump. Coley kicks me while I’m down, hard in the ribs.

‘Not such a tough girl now, are you?’ he spits.

‘There’s no need for that,’ Barnes says wearily, climbing out of the van and shutting the doors.

‘Don’t
tell me you’re going to shoot me just for kicking her,’ Coley giggles.

Barnes frowns. ‘Some days I wonder why I keep you around.’

‘Because I’m good at what I do,’ Coley says smugly, kicking me again. ‘It’s the same reason I put up with your righteous crap. We work well together. We need each other, much as it might pain either of us to admit it.’

Barnes cracks his knuckles and casts
an eye over me. ‘You take the legs,’ he says. ‘I’ll take the upper body.’

‘You sure?’ Coley asks.

‘Yeah. You’d keep dropping her on her head otherwise.’

Coley laughs with delight then picks up my legs. Barnes slips his hands under my shoulders and lifts. They juggle me around until they’re comfortable, then start ahead. They’re both strong men and they might as well be carrying a
small dog for all the effort it takes them. Even so, I’m guessing they won’t want to carry me too far – they’re vulnerable with me in their hands, easy prey if zombies attack – and I’m proved right a minute later when they pass by the cool glass building of City Hall, head down to the bank of the Thames and take a left.

HMS
Belfast
is docked ahead of us. I came this way when I first trekked
across from the east. There were people on the deck of the famous old cruiser, armed to the teeth. They shot at me before I could ask any questions, scared me off, made it clear they didn’t welcome strangers. They’re still up there and look to be just as heavily armed. But they don’t fire at Barnes and Coley. It seems like they’re expecting us.

The hunters carry me up the gangway. They
don’t say anything. Once onboard, they lay me down and take a step back. The people with the rifles press closer. There are at least a dozen of them, more spread across the deck. They look like soldiers although they’re dressed in suits. They don’t smile, just stare at me with distaste.

‘Is this one of the speaking zombies?’ a man in a suit and wearing shades like Coley’s asks.

‘Yeah,’
Barnes replies.

‘You finally came good and caught one,’ the man sniffs.

‘I swore that I would.’

‘Took you long enough.’

Barnes smiles tightly. ‘If you thought you could do better, you should have said so. I’d have been happy to spend my days lounging around here and let you go scour the streets instead.’

The man in the suit scowls. ‘Think you’re hot stuff, don’t you, Barnes?’

Barnes shrugs. ‘I’m just a guy who gets the job done. Now, are the lords and ladies of the Board
ready to accept their delivery?’

‘Wait here,’ the man says. ‘I’ll go check.’

There’s a short delay. Barnes and Coley stand at ease. The people with the rifles keep them trained on me, ready to blast me to hell if I show the slightest sign that I’m about to try to break free.

Eventually someone comes running towards us. ‘Let me see! Let me see!’ a panting man cries and the guards
around us part.

I spot a fat man in a sailor suit prancing across the deck. The suit is too small for him and his stomach is exposed. It’s hairy and there are crumbs stuck in the hairs.

The fat man crouches next to me and stares, eyes wide, lips quivering. He notes the hole in my chest and studies my face. His smile fades. ‘It’s a girl. I thought it would be a boy.’

‘I didn’t know
you had a preference,’ Barnes says. ‘Does it make any difference?’

The fat man purses his lips. ‘I suppose not. I just assumed . . .’ He shrugs and smiles again. ‘Make her talk, Barnes. Make her talk for Dan-Dan. I want to hear her before the others. I want to be the first.’

Barnes looks at the guard in the suit and glasses, who has followed behind the guy dressed like a sailor. The
guard shrugs. Barnes carefully removes my gag and shifts out of my way.

The fat man nods at me, grinning like a lunatic. ‘Come on, little girl. Talk for Dan-Dan. Let me hear you.’

I look
Dan-Dan
up and down, slow as you like, then smile lazily. ‘You’re about three sizes too large for that ridiculous suit, fat boy.’

Dan-Dan’s jaw drops. Some of the guards smirk. Coley snorts with laughter.
Barnes just stares at me.

‘You . . . you . . .’ Dan-Dan sputters. He starts to swing a hand at me, to slap me. Then he remembers what I am and stops. His smile swims back into place and he blows me a kiss. ‘You’re wonderful,’ he gurgles. ‘A spirited, snarling, she-snake. Everything I was hoping for and more. We’re going to have so much fun with you, little girl.’

Dan-Dan lurches to his feet and claps his hands
at Barnes and Coley. ‘Don’t stand there like fools,’ he barks, going from buffoon to commander in the space of a few seconds. ‘Bring her through to the Wardroom. The others are waiting and we’re not renowned for our patience.’

As Barnes and Coley pick me up again – pausing only to stick my gag back in place – Dan-Dan sets off ahead of us. He waddles like a duck but there’s nothing funny
about him now. I’m in serious trouble here. And while the farcically dressed fat man is nowhere near as scary as Mr Dowling or Owl Man, he’s probably more of a threat than either of them. Both of those freaks chose to let me run free, but I’ve a horrible feeling that Dan-Dan wants me for keeps.

Barnes and Coley carry me across the deck, down a flight of stairs, then towards the rear of the cruiser, which they refer to as the aft. Dan-Dan trots ahead of us, skipping at times, singing to himself.

Dan-Dan opens a door and we enter a long room dominated
by a massive table. It could easily seat a couple of dozen people, but only five individuals are sitting around it. They’re spread out, as if they don’t want to sit too close to one another. There are ten guards in the room, standing by the walls, surrounding the table. All have handguns and are pointing them at me.

Coley chuckles uneasily. ‘You guys want to lower those? If you fire off
a shot accidentally, you might hit Barnes or me.’

‘There will be no accidents here,’ a woman at the table says. She’s in her forties or fifties. Dressed to the nines, dripping in necklaces and diamonds. If she looked any posher, she’d be a queen.

Dan-Dan takes a seat and chortles. ‘Lady Jemima is correct, as always. If we shoot you, it will be on purpose.’

Barnes ignores the veiled
threat and helps Coley set me on my feet. ‘Her name’s Becky Smith,’ he tells the six people at the table. ‘She’s one of the talking zombies.’

‘It’s true,’ Dan-Dan gushes. ‘I heard her speak on deck. She insulted me. I didn’t like that—she’s a naughty little minx who must be taught the error of her ways. But she can definitely speak.’

‘We never doubted you, Barnes,’ another man says.
He’s smartly dressed in a purple suit. He looks young, but there are faint wrinkles around his eyes when he smiles, which make me think he’s older than he appears. ‘We were just concerned that it was taking you so long to find one for us.’

Barnes shuffles his feet and pulls a face. ‘I’m slow but sure.’ It’s an act. There’s nothing slow about Barnes. But he’s clearly wary of these people
and their armed guards.

‘Remove the gag,’ one of the other men says. This one has an eastern European accent. He’s dressed like a prince, crown and all.

‘Yes, sir,’ Barnes murmurs and reaches up to free my mouth. ‘Be careful what you say to them,’ he whispers. ‘They don’t have a sense of humour.’

I stare silently at my regally attired captors when the gag has been removed.

‘Well?’
Lady Jemima asks, twisting a diamond ring as she bores into me with her gaze.

‘What?’ I sniff and she stops turning the ring.

‘Incredible,’ she sighs.

‘She spoke to me first,’ Dan-Dan crows. ‘Did you hear that, Luca?’ he calls to the guy in the purple suit. ‘I was first.’

‘Mother would be so proud of you,’ Luca purrs sarcastically. ‘If you hadn’t thrown her to a zombie to save
yourself, that is.’

Dan-Dan’s face drops. ‘I thought we weren’t going to mention that again.’

Luca sniffs and leans towards me. ‘Tell us about yourself, girl. Where are you from? How can you speak? Are there many more like you?’

I cock my head at him and don’t answer. He studies me silently, then grins viciously. ‘The next time you refuse to answer a question, I’ll have one of my men
cut off the little finger on your left hand. After that, it will be your head. I only believe in a single warning. So, unless you’re keen to die today, talk.’

‘There’s not much I can tell you,’ I say sullenly. ‘I don’t know how I can talk or why I’m different.’ That’s a lie, but I’m not going to rat out Dr Oystein to this pack of creeps. I think about saying I’m a one-off, but Barnes has
seen me with other Angels. I have to be careful, lie cautiously, mix in a bit of truth.

‘There are several of us that I know about. We wander around London together. We’ve been looking for answers but haven’t found any, so we’ve been getting by as best we can.’

BOOK: Zom-B Gladiator
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