7 Years Bad Sex (26 page)

Unexpectedly, an organ began to play, and Casey nearly fainted with shock at the sudden volume. It took her several seconds to process
what
the organ was playing, and she stopped dead in her tracks.

‘Alex,’ she hissed. ‘There must be a wedding here today. I think we’d better leave.’

‘Oh no,’ Alex contradicted her. ‘On the contrary. I think you need to keep going up that aisle.’

‘You what?’ Casey did a double take. Alex appeared to be smiling, and his face had relaxed. He didn’t seem in the slightest surprised that the unseen organist was pounding out the bridal march.

‘Come, come,’ a brittle but cheerful voice called from the nave. ‘You must be Casey and Alex. I’ve been waiting for you.’

 

~Alex~

 

Casey’s face was a picture, and for the slightest moment, Alex wasn’t sure whether she was happy or mighty annoyed with him. Her lips twitched and her eyes narrowed. And then, gradually, her mouth curved into a smile.

‘You planned this?’

Alex nodded, unable to speak right that second. His mouth had dried up and words wouldn’t come.

‘You want us to retake our vows?’ Casey asked. ‘Here? Today? All by ourselves?’

Alex swallowed frantically, trying to summon his voice. ‘Yes,’ he croaked. ‘I do. Hence the—you know—flowers.’

Casey shot him an indignant look. ‘But I’m in jeans!’

‘So am I. Who cares? It’s not about what we wear. It’s about what we say.’

‘Is this legal?’

‘Of course. I think. Unusual, maybe, but not unlawful. The vicar agreed to it, after all.’

‘You know the vicar?’

‘I don’t. I spoke to him on the phone. I explained what I wanted to do and why, and, after a while, he relented.’

‘So now he’s waiting for us at the front there?’

‘Uh-huh. I think we’d better go. Go to the front, I mean. It would be rude to abandon him now.’

Alex nudged Casey in the back. He realised that the unseen organist had played the entire bridal march through once and was beginning all over again, only slightly faster.

‘Okay,’ Casey agreed at last. ‘But you’re walking by my side. If we’re doing this the unconventional way, we’re doing it unconventional the whole way.’

She grasped Alex’s hand, and they walked down the aisle with slow, measured steps. The vicar smiled at them benignly and greeted them warmly.

‘Casey, Alex,’ he began. ‘Welcome to the little church of St Mary’s by the Sea. We are gathered here today to—um—join you again, in a manner of speaking, in matrimony because the—um—last ceremony didn’t quite—um—work out right.’

Alex bit his lip. That was a lot of ‘ums’ in one sentence, but he guessed the old vicar was slightly perplexed by their unusual circumstances. A few ‘ums’ could be forgiven.

‘Yes,’ he said clearly just as the organ came to the end of the bridal march for the second time, and his voice reverberated loudly in the church.

‘Yes,’ he repeated more softly.

‘Would you kneel for a moment?’ the vicar invited, sounding more comfortable now. Alex and Casey obediently kneeled, Casey clutching her bouquet of wild flowers and grass. The vicar placed a hand on each of their heads and issued a brief blessing.

‘Now then, let’s proceed,’ he said when he was ready. ‘Do you have any rings?’

‘Rings?’ Alex gave a start. ‘Of course we do. Hang on. We—um—have to take them off.’ He pulled at his wedding ring which, surprisingly, didn’t want to yield. Eventually he managed to slip it off, and Casey did the same with hers. They handed their rings to the vicar, who placed them on a cushion.

‘Great,’ he smiled. ‘Now we begin.’ He adopted a deeper, more theatrical voice. ‘Matrimony is a gift through which…’

Alex listened intently while the vicar delivered a slightly altered version of the traditional order of service. He didn’t remember most of it from their first, ‘proper’ wedding ceremony. Perhaps nerves had stopped him from taking the words in that time, but he was making up for it now.

‘…and joins you in the joy and affection of sexual togetherness…’

Alex blinked. He was positive that this hadn’t been mentioned by the minister who performed their wedding in France. He sneaked a glance at Casey, who was looking straight ahead.
Had she heard? Had the significance of these words hit home with her too? And would this change anything?
Oh, how he hoped it would. Maybe this was a sign.

It was time to say their vows.

‘I, Alex Morgan, take you, Casey Naight, to be my wife…’ He could hear his voice tremble with emotion, and his hands shook. The giving of rings would be next, and he wondered how he would manage to put her ring on her finger with his own fingers having taken on the strength and consistency of uncooked sausages.

There it was, the crucial moment. The vicar proffered the cushion with their wedding rings, and Alex grasped Casey’s clumsily.

‘Casey, I give you this ring,’ he repeated after the vicar and placed the ring gently and very deliberately on Casey’s hand, looking her in the eyes as he did so. Life and good luck was all about looking people in the eye, he had decided.

Casey did the same when it was her turn, and her eyes shone with that unusual emerald light that he so loved. It was a truly special moment. The sun chose that instant to illuminate the circular stained glass window above the altar, casting a magical multi-coloured glow over them, and Casey and Alex gasped as one.

The organ burst into sound once more, and the effect was thoroughly overwhelming. Casey and Alex stood in awed amazement until after the organ finished.

Suddenly, the organist appeared through a door in the chancel. ‘Congratulations,’ he shouted cheerfully towards Casey and Alex. Then he addressed the vicar. ‘John, I’ve got to dash. I’ll see you later.’ Without waiting for a reply, he bustled down the aisle with an energetic wave. Casey and Alex didn’t even get a chance to say ‘thank you’.

‘That was quite extraordinary,’ Casey finally remarked.

The vicar smiled widely. ‘You came at the right time of day for this spectacle to happen and Mark—the organist—likes to enhance the drama if he can. Many couples come and get married here in hopes of capturing this moment, but it doesn’t always work out. It lasts only for a few minutes, and it’s considered extremely good luck to have been blessed by the lights of St Mary’s by the Sea.

‘We need all the luck we can get,’ Casey whispered. ‘This—Thank you. This means a lot.’

The vicar inclined his head. ‘So I understand. I hope it does help. You do realise that I didn’t perform a legal ceremony here today? There’s no signing of the registers as you’re already married. But Alex explained to me the importance of… of re-enacting your vows, and I couldn’t decline his wish.’

‘Thank you,’ Alex chimed in. ‘We appreciate it. This was everything I’d hoped for and more. I… I feel moved. There was something here today that… that perhaps was missing on our wedding day.’

‘I agree,’ Casey offered immediately. ‘Maybe it’s being in a church, or perhaps it’s because these vows were private, just between us? I don’t know, I can’t explain it, but I’m so very glad that you gave us this opportunity.’

‘You’re very welcome,’ the vicar assured her. ‘I hope it brings you everything you wish for.’

Alex coughed. ‘Do we—what do we owe you? There is normally a charge for the wedding, right?’

‘There is indeed.’ The vicar spoke softly. ‘But there was no service being performed here today. I had a private conversation with two people who needed my help. There is no charge.’ He winked. ‘I know He will approve.’

‘Thank you so much,’ Casey gushed. ‘I don’t know what else to say.’

‘You don’t need to say anything else,’ the vicar replied. ‘Simply go and live a happy life. Oh, and drop by sometime if you’re back in these parts.’

‘We certainly will,’ Alex promised.

And they said their goodbyes. The vicar withdrew to the vestry, and Alex led his re-avowed wife back down the aisle. Just before they reached the door, Casey stopped him.

‘Look.’ She pointed at an arrangement of prayer candles by the baptismal font. ‘Let’s light one and leave a donation.’

‘Great idea.’ Alex immediately understood. ‘Let’s light two and leave a double donation.’

He watched while Casey lit two candles and whispered some words that he couldn’t quite make out. When she was done, he retrieved a few notes from his wallet and placed them gently in the donations box. He wasn’t given to praying, but he found himself fervently hoping that their marriage would be given a fresh start.

 

~Casey~

 

‘I can’t believe you organised this.’ Casey smiled and clutched her bouquet as they emerged from the church into the bright sunlight. ‘This was truly something else. I’ll treasure this forever, no matter what happens.’

‘Me too,’ Alex replied. ‘But let’s not get our hopes up sky high. I simply wanted to… let’s say, “refresh” our vows, and you know what? They meant more this time round, even though it wasn’t the real thing.’

Casey giggled. ‘That thing about the sexual togetherness? Was that in the vows last time?’

‘You picked up on that too?’ Alex grinned. ‘I don’t remember it. Maybe we were conned. Maybe we weren’t properly married before. Maybe
that’s
where everything went wrong.’

Casey crinkled her brow. ‘That would be too easy. As you said, let’s not get our hopes up again. But it was a wonderful thing to do, just you and me. Thank you, again.’ She hugged Alex tightly and was pleased when he encircled her in his arms in return.
This
was properly getting married.

‘What’s next?’ she asked after a moment.

Alex pointed towards a cluster of houses just visible at the far point of the bay. ‘That’s Tregarren. I’m told it’s not too far from here, maybe another forty-five minute walk. There’s a pub waiting for us there. What do you think? Or we can go back to the cottage?’

‘It’s a beautiful day,’ Casey thought out loud. ‘And I just got married for the second time. Let’s walk and have a celebratory lunch. Lead on, husband, lead the way.’

They chatted as they walked, enjoying the late autumn sunshine and the play of the seagulls above them.

‘Do you know,’ Casey remarked after a while. ‘Lately I’ve thought seagulls gave mournful cries, but today they seem to be happy.’

‘They’re celebrating with us,’ Alex suggested. ‘But I know what you mean. It’s a perfect afternoon. Although I’m jolly starving.’

‘We must be nearly there,’ Casey replied. ‘Do you know where to find the pub?’

‘No idea, but it’s supposed to be obvious. Tregarren is only a little place. I suggest we hit the main street and see where it takes us.’

Sure enough, a half hour later they were happily installed at a table at the Mermaid Inn with a Stargazy pie and a large glass of wine each.

Casey felt a bit dubious about the heads and tails of the pilchards sticking out of the crust, but it was a traditional Cornish dish, and the landlady had said it was phenomenal.

‘Do we eat these?’ Casey asked Alex, prodding one of the baked fish heads lightly with her fork.

‘I don’t know,’ Alex responded. ‘I suppose so. But leave them if you don’t like them. It’s the crust and the filling that are meant to be spectacular.’

‘At least they’re cooked,’ Casey chuckled.

‘Unlike oysters, you mean?’ Alex laughed too. ‘Gosh, I don’t know what possessed me to eat so many of them all at once.’