A Constant Reminder (28 page)

“This is a public place.”

“Roxanne has moved on. I strongly advise you to do the same.” Quincy stressed every word with a harsh tone.

People walking by took notice of the escalating confrontation. A woman stared as she exited the café and almost walked into the duo.

“What are you, a relationship counselor?” Adam taunted.

Roxanne sprung out of the cafe doors. “Adam, stop this now. Just go home and stop following me.”

“This is a public place. I want a cafe mocha latte cappuccino or something.”

“You’re drunk in the middle of the day. Quincy he’s drunk.”

“It figures.” Quincy rolled his eyes.

“Roxanne, are you seeing this guy, Quincy?” Adam asked.

“I don’t have to answer any questions. Adam it’s over between us. It’s been over. I will call the police and get a restraining order against you. I will put you back in jail if I have too. You already have a record. Stop stalking me. Leave, me, alone.”

“You heard the lady. Stop making a jackass out of yourself. Hit the road.”

Quincy grabbed Adam’s arm. Adam quickly pulled away almost falling to the ground. Adam half stumbled across the street. He got into his truck and pulled off slowly.

Roxanne looked at Quincy with a sense of relief apparent on her face.

“He has a record.” Quincy repeated.

***

Roxanne was embarrassed by what happened at the coffeehouse. She avoided Quincy’s phone calls. She wasn’t ready to date and she was sure that’s what Quincy wanted to do.

Roxanne had to come into the doctor’s office to get Morgan’s test results. Roxanne sat in one of two vacant chairs in front of a large clutter filled desk. A shiny tan leather chair was parked behind the desk. Above the chair was a hand full of diplomas and certificates displayed on the wall.

Dr. Thompson was a forty-something Irish man. He entered and took a seat behind his desk.

“Hello there.”

“Hello doctor.”

“Okay Miss Potts, well we did receive the results from the CBC and it shows a low red blood count. Morgan is suffering from severe anemia and she may even need a blood transfusion.”

“A blood transfusion? What does all this mean?”

“Morgan has a lot of the symptoms associated with Myelofibrosis. It’s a disease of the bone marrow. This could explain her low blood count, the fatigue, abdominal fullness, the enlarged spleen and the severe bruising that has been happening for a while now.”

“Is Mellow, Mylo--”

“Myelofibrosis.”

“Is this cancer?” The words stumbled out of Roxanne’s mouth.

“Yes, cancer of the bone marrow. But before we jump the gun I’m going to order a bone marrow biopsy for Morgan. I’m going to schedule it as soon as possible and call you at home with the details.

“She seems healthy, just a little tired sometimes.”

“Let’s just run the test and be optimistic.”

Roxanne held her purse tightly in her lap. Her fingers hurt. She had heard the doctor and the possibility existed that Morgan had cancer.

***

Roxanne’s plate was full. She sat at her cluttered desk in the MetLife Insurance building. She typed on the keyboard and stared at the computers monitor.

There was a knock on the door. “Come in.” Roxanne called out.

Roxanne stopped typing. The door opened and Erika peeked inside. Roxanne invited Erika to her job but she wasn’t sure she was going to show up. They had both been busy lately and hadn’t really hung out much.

“Can I come in?”

“Yeah girl, get in here.”

Erika came into the office and closed the door behind her. Erika noticed a splint on Roxanne’s palm and wrist.

“Did you hurt your wrist?”

“Oh it’s just carpel tunnel.”

“I would’ve called to tell you I was coming but I don’t have your new work number.”

“Yea, I had to change my home and work number a few times because of Adam.”

“I saw your mom at the grocery store she said he finally left you alone.”

“Yeah I haven’t heard from him in about four months.”

“I wanted to apologize to you. I just was so embarrassed and ashamed of that day that I, you know. I know it was a long time ago but we never really addressed it.”

“That was a long time ago.”

“I handled everything so wrong. I kind of abandoned you when you needed me most.” Erika took a seat in the lone chair in front of Roxanne’s desk.

“Quincy told me you and Teri moved in together. So you two are official.”

“Yeah. It was wrong of me not to tell you I was a lesbian. I was just so afraid that you wouldn’t want to be my friend anymore.

“That’s stupid. I thought we were friends forever. I don’t care that you’re gay. I really miss hanging out with you. Morgan really misses you too.”

Roxanne sat quietly for a moment. She suddenly bursts out into tears. Erika rushed over to her.

“Roxanne what’s wrong?”

“It’s Morgan.”

Roxanne repeated the information Dr. Thompson gave her. She invited Erika to the hospital. She needed Erika’s support when she took Morgan in to see the doctor tomorrow.

Tomorrow came quicker than she imagined. Erika and Roxanne’s mother Margaret sat anxiously waiting. They observed Roxanne slowly approaching them. Margaret stood to greet Roxanne. They hoped for good news.

“What did they say?” Margaret was first to ask.

Roxanne gazed at her mother.

Erika stood. “Roxanne what they say?”

“Morgan needs a bone marrow transplant. She has to see a bone marrow specialist. There’s this thing with her blood count.” Roxanne’s eyes swelled with tears. “It’s likely that, that she’s going to have her spleen removed.” Roxanne began to cry silently.

“Roxanne don’t worry we’re going to beat this. Morgan’s the strongest kid I know.” Her mother tried to comfort her.

“Yeah Roxanne, don’t upset yourself. We will make it though this. We all will.” Erika added as she held in her tears.

Margaret gave Roxanne a hug. Roxanne rested her head on her mother’s shoulder. This was too much to bear but she had to bear it for Morgan’s sake.

Later that night Roxanne stood near the bed staring down at Morgan while she slept.

Roxanne walked up to the bed pulled the blankets back and crawled into bed alongside Morgan and held her close.

There would be more nights in the hospital in her future. She hoped she was strong enough to endure. Morgan needed a strong mother not the weak mother she thought she had turned into.

Roxanne had to push her pride aside and do what was required to keep her daughter alive. She had researched Morgan’s condition and she was left with the option of finding a bone marrow donor that matched. Roxanne wasn’t a match. Her mother wasn’t a match and it was clear that Roxanne needed to contact the paternal side of Morgan’s family.

She hadn’t seen or heard from Adam. He had stopped lurking in the shadows long ago. She drove to the three oil change garages and he wasn’t there. Maybe he had changed jobs. Maybe he was working at the architectural firm he had told her about. She didn’t have an address for it. So she went to the only place she knew he was connected to, his mother’s house.

CHAPTER 22

Roxanne showed up the next morning at Jane Hardwick’s house. She rang the bell a few times and no one came to the door. She decided to walk around to the back of the house. She spotted his mother in her rose garden.

Jane Hardwick was kneeling down and working feverishly in her flower garden. She looked up and noticed Roxanne standing before her.

Jane stood. “Look what the wind blew in. I must be seeing a ghost. I can’t fathom why you would show up here after an entire year.” Jane hastily removed her gardening gloves. “Well just don’t stand there, speak.”

“I’m here because I need to contact Adam.”

“Why?”Jane stood to face Roxanne.

“It’s private. It’s a personal matter between us.”

“And I care about your personal matters.” Jane snarled.

“It’s private and personal.”

“My son was completely devastated when you literally left him standing at the altar.”

“That’s a gross exaggeration of the facts and you know it.”

“Tell me the facts. He wouldn’t tell me anything. You tell me.”

“It’s not my story to tell.”

“Was it his criminal past?”

“Not entirely.”

“ It took him a long time to get over you.”

“That’s ironic because it only took me two seconds to get over him.” Roxanne couldn’t believe she said that. She was really on edge.

“You come off so high and mighty.”

“Is that right?”

“Yes. When you don’t even come from anything at all, poor little girl. All you have is your college degree. Apparently you didn’t have the good sense to marry into a good name and money.”

“Your son is a criminal, a liar a drug addict. He murdered someone. He is far from a prize. Adam didn’t obviously tell you the truth about what happened between us.”

“Here’s your chance, Missy. Enchant and bedazzle me with your side of the story.”

“I knew I shouldn’t have come here.”

“I shouldn’t have welcomed you into my family.”

“I shouldn’t have believed your son’s lies. We all make mistakes and it was a mistake coming here.” Roxanne turned to walk away.

“Well leave!” Jane barked.

Roxanne sharply turned back toward Jane. “ I have no problem doing just that. What’s that saying? Oh yes, the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree. Tell your son I need to talk to him or not. He’ll know how to find me.”

“Maybe he doesn’t want to find you.”

Roxanne walked away and disappeared from Jane’s line of sight.

“Maybe.” Roxanne whispered. She hoped and prayed that he did want to find her. She hoped and prayed his mother would just tell him she showed up. He was her last resort and the only hope she had left.

***

Roxanne was able to take Morgan home with a host of medications. Erika was waiting at Roxanne’s apartment. Roxanne was grateful for the help that Erika was offering. She needed it.

When Roxanne entered her apartment Erika greeted her with a smile. Roxanne tried to return the smile but it was too hard under the circumstances. Roxanne was carrying Morgan and she was lighter than ever. She was losing weight and this troubled Roxanne.

“I’m so happy to be out of the hospital. I hate it there.”

Erika took a sleeping Morgan from Roxanne’s arms.

“Roxanne don’t upset yourself. I will put her in bed.” Erika walked away and disappeared down the hall.

Roxanne put her purse down and took seat on the couch. She was exhausted. She almost fell asleep.

Erika entered and sat next to her. “Did you hear from him? Did he call, text something?”

“No.” Roxanne hung her head.

“Don’t worry, he’s going to call. The way he behaved. He’s going to call.”

“Even if he does, that doesn’t mean he’s a match. It doesn’t mean he’s going to even help me.”

“Let’s just hope he is a match.”

Roxanne leaned her head back in the couch. Her cell phone buzzed in her purse. She took her cell phone out and she answered. “Hello.”

“Roxanne.” Adam’s voice came from her phone and she sat up. She recognized his voice just like she had heard it recently. Why did he sound so familiar to her? “Roxanne.”

“Yes, yes, I’m here.”

“My mother said you came by. She said you were looking for me.”

“Yes. I want to talk to you.” Roxanne could feel Erika’s eyes burning the side of her face.

“When, where do you want to meet?” He asked.

“I, ah, the Family Style on Martin Ridge Way. Can you meet me tomorrow at three?”

“I can meet you anytime and anyplace.”

Roxanne didn’t know what to say. Her voice failed.

“Roxanne.”

“Yes, I will be there tomorrow.” Roxanne ended the call and sat there like she had seen a ghost. She had heard a ghost.

***

Roxanne didn’t fear Adam as much as she feared he wouldn’t help her. She got to the restaurant and noticed he was already there.

Adam sat all alone at a table nervously fidgeting in the booth. He looked over the menu a million times. He tried to focus on the words. He looked down at his wristwatch. She was late. Maybe she wouldn’t show up. He hated himself for so many things but he hated himself for still being in love with her. Why wouldn’t it go away? He was sure it wasn’t because they had a child. It was deeper than that.

Time didn’t heal him the way he hoped. His soul ached and he had to fight the urge to be sober. He wanted to run back to the unwavering embrace of heroin. It was the only thing that could compete with the love he felt for Roxanne. He had started going to Narcotics Anonymous. He needed support, the kind of support that his family couldn’t provide.