A Family Apart (7 page)

“Can’t you understand how much it hurts me to see you go?”

“No!” Frances cried. For a moment she wavered. “I can’t. I love you, Ma, and I thought you loved me. I can’t understand how you could give us away, and I’ll never forgive you. Never!”

“Oh!” Ma took a step backward, holding her hands to her cheeks and flinching as though she’d been struck. “Frances Mary, you’ve never in your life spoken such angry words to me.”

Frances just shook her head, unable to say another
word. She knew she’d begin to cry uncontrollably if she tried to speak again.

Ma’s voice was heavy with sorrow. “You, Frances—you who’ve been my strength in so many ways, so many times—it’s sure I’ve been that I could count on you, sure that you’d understand.”

Frances desperately longed to reach out and hold her mother, but she couldn’t. She wouldn’t.

Reverend Brace stepped forward and took Peg and Petey by the hand. Peg, her lower lip trembling, tried to tug her hand away, but Petey just stared at Ma, his big blue eyes spilling over with tears. “It’s time to go now,” Reverend Brace said.

Gently, Ma touched each child, one by one, with her fingertips. “It won’t be forever, Danny,” she whispered. “We’ll someday be together again. Mike, you’re a good, brave lad, and you’ve got a chance now to prove yourself.” She smiled. “Remember that I’ll always believe in you.”

She paused with her hands on Megan’s head, as though she were giving a blessing. “My darlin’, gentle girl, you’re the one who might take this the hardest. Just remember that you come from a strong, sturdy people, who down through the years have had the courage to do what must be done. And Peg—”

Frances could hear the catch in Ma’s voice as she stroked Peg’s cheek. “Peg, love, there’s so much joy in you always spilling out, it will make the going easy. Oh, how I’ll miss that happy laughter.”

“Ma,” Petey whimpered, and Ma bent to hold his face between her hands. “You have nothing to fear, lad. Frances will keep a special watch on you. You’re so young, all this will soon be tucked in a far corner of your mind.” Frances could barely hear her mother’s whisper. “Oh, Petey, don’t completely forget your ma!”

Ma rose. “One last kiss before we say good-bye,” she said and turned to Frances, holding her tightly. “I know that someday you’ll understand and forgive me, love,” she murmured. “If I didn’t know that, I couldn’t bear to see you hurt this way.”

Frances’s cheek was damp as her mother’s tears mingled with her own, but still she didn’t speak. Finally Ma let go, her eyes brimming with moisture. Ma’s gaze fell on each of her children one more time, then she blew them all a kiss and turned away. Frances watched her mother stride down the hall and desperately fought against the panic that made her want to run screaming after Ma. At the corner of the hall Ma paused, glancing back for just a second before she disappeared from sight.

“Don’t leave us, Ma!” Frances whispered. “I want to stay with you! I don’t want any part of life in the West!”

I
NSIDE THE
C
HILDREN’S
Aid Society building on Amity Street was a long bench on which the children were told to sit. On a table near the front door was a pile of freshly ironed dresses, shirts, trousers, stockings, and under-clothes. Frances could read the note that was pinned on top of the pile: “A donation for the children.”

“Please be seated,” Reverend Brace said. He smiled reassuringly. “Mrs. Minton will join us in a few minutes, and you’ll soon meet the other children who’ll make the trip with you.”

“Will you go to the West with us?” Peg asked, her voice wobbling. She clung to his hand.

Mr. Brace gently removed her hand from his and patted it. “No,” he said. “I’m needed here in New York. But you’ll have two fine people who’ll take care of you during your trip. Mr. Andrew MacNair is my scout. It’s his job to find good farm families who will adopt you.
And helping him on this trip is Mrs. Katherine Banks, who runs a general store in the town of St. Joseph.”

“St. Joseph is a town?” Danny blurted out in surprise.

“In Missouri,” Mr. Brace answered. “That’s your destination.”

Frances had a question of her own. “Please, Reverend Brace,” she said, “can you tell me about my friend, Mara Robi?”

“Of course,” he said and looked down the hall. “Mrs. Minton should be here at any moment. If you don’t mind waiting alone, I’ll go to my office and check with someone who will know exactly how Mara is doing.”

The children squeezed together on the bench. No one seemed to feel like talking. Next to the bench was an open door to an office, and Frances could easily hear the conversation between a man and two women inside the room.

“I brought some clothes I collected for the poor, dear orphans,” a woman announced.

“Thank you, Mrs. Marsh.” This voice belonged to a younger woman.

“How many boys and how many girls will you take on this trip, Mr. MacNair?” Mrs. Marsh asked.

“I haven’t made a tally yet,” the man said. “But I think we’ll have more boys than girls, which is good. It’s always easier to place boys, because boys can help with the outdoor farm chores. Some families will even take two children from a family if they’re boys.”

Frances took a quick breath. She had heard her mother speak of
homes
, but she had been so upset and distracted that she hadn’t realized what Ma had meant. They were going to be separated!

Frances knew that Megan, Mike, and Danny had understood, too. Megan gave a little whimper and shivered as she nuzzled closer to her sister.

“We’ll stick together, you and me, huh, Mike?” Frances heard Danny whisper, and she sighed at the desperate hope in his voice.

“What ages are the children?” the woman asked.

“All ages,” Mr. MacNair said, “up to our top age limit of fourteen.”

A frantic jumble of thoughts tossed through Frances’s head. What was she going to do? She had promised to take special care of Petey. She had to keep Petey with her. She raised a hand and fingered her long hair. Ma had loved that hair, which was just the color of her mother’s.

After the sound of shuffling papers and a squeaking chair, Mr. MacNair said, “Let’s see if Charles has returned. I have some questions to ask him.”

The women and man left the office, smiling at the children as they passed them. After a quick glance, Frances looked away. She hoped they hadn’t noticed her. She kept a sharp watch. As soon as they had disappeared into a room near the end of the hallway, Frances jumped to her feet. She pulled her hand away from Petey, then pried off his fingers as he clutched at her skirt.

“Listen to me!” she whispered, and they all did, recognizing the urgency in her voice. “I’m going outside for just a few minutes. When I come back I’ll look different, and I want all of you to call me Frankie. Frances is all right, if you forget, because that can be a boy’s name, too. But whatever you do, don’t call me Frances
Mary
!”

“But, what—?” Peg began, as she squirmed on the bench.

“Peg!” Frances interrupted. “Pay attention. This is important. I’m going to dress like a boy. You must remember. I’ll be Frankie, your
brother
, not your sister!”

Megan’s eyes were wide. “You can’t do that!” she said.

“For a little while I can. Just for a while.”

“Why?” Danny asked.

“So Petey and I can stay together,” Frances said. “If it’s boys to do the chores that those farm families are wanting, then it’s a boy I’ll become.” Frances paused and added, “Will you remember my new name, Petey?”

His eyes suddenly sparkled with mischief. “Is this a game?”

“No. It’s not a game,” Frances said. “You must not forget.” She turned to the others. “Will all of you remember?”

Megan, Peg, and Danny nodded, but Mike laughed “Just how are you going to look like a boy, with that long hair and those skirts?”

“Do you still have your pocketknife?”

“Yes.”

“Then give it to me quickly,” Frances said. With the knife in her hand, she ran to the table of clothing and snatched up a boy’s cotton shirt and trousers. Then she ran out the door and around the corner of the building to the alley. Dropping the clothing to the ground, Frances quickly opened the knife, grabbed a hank of her long hair, then shuddered at the sound of the metal blade raggedly cutting through the thick, resistant mass.

In a few minutes Frances, dressed in boys’ clothes, hair cropped short, raced back into the building. She stopped short when she saw the plump, gray-haired woman who stood in front of the bench and held her breath, waiting to see how the woman would react to her. Petey and Peg were sniffling, and Megan was pale, her eyes dark and frightened. Her brothers and sisters stared with astonishment as Frances quickly slid next to them on the bench.

“Sorry, ma’am,” Frances said, trying to keep her voice from trembling. “I—uh—had to go outside.”

“It’s all right,” the woman said. She studied a small sheet of paper, then looked up and smiled at Megan. “You must be Frances Mary, dear. Reverend Brace told me to inform you that your friend, Mara, is still in the hospital, but she is recovering nicely.”

Megan quickly glanced at her sister. Frances’s joy and relief about Mara were dampened by fear that her disguise would be found out. Quickly she stammered, “
I’m
Francis, and it’s not Mary, it’s—uh—Martin. But forget the ‘Martin’ part. Just call me Frankie.”

Mrs. Minton stared hard at the paper. “My, my,” she said. “The handwriting doesn’t look that hard to read.”

Mike gave Frances a hard clip on the shoulder, and she winced. “She thinks you look like a girl, Frankie. Huh! Where are your pretty curls?”

Frances landed a sock on Mike’s arm before he could lean out of the way, and Mrs. Minton quickly said, “Don’t do that, boys! You can’t behave like that around here!”

“I don’t look like a girl!” Frances muttered as fiercely as she could.

“Of course you don’t,” Mrs. Minton said. “Somewhere there was a mistake in this list of names, and it’s certainly not your fault.”

Peg stood, her chin held high. “I am Margaret Ann Kelly,” she announced proudly, “no matter what that paper says, but everybody calls me ‘Peg.’ ”

Mrs. Minton went on to meet the other Kelly children, one by one, then smoothed the long white apron that covered her dark cotton dress. “I know this is a difficult experience for you children, so I’ll try to make it easier by explaining what we’re going to do.”

Peg sniffled, and Mrs. Minton said, “Don’t cry, dear. Think about the pretty new dress you’ll soon be wearing.” She smiled and patted Peg’s shoulder, handing her
a small, lacy handkerchief before she continued. “To begin with, my name is Mrs. Minton. I’m going to see that each of you has a nice warm bath. I’ll expect you boys to use plenty of soap on your hair, too, and I’ll help the girls.” She stared for a moment at Frances’s hair. “I’m very good at trimming hair. You’ll want to start your journey with a nice tidy haircut, won’t you?”

“Yes, ma’am,” Frances stuttered. A bath? Oh, no! She’d be discovered before they even left New York! She felt a hot blush creep over her neck and face, and she ducked her head. Mike snickered so softly that only Frances could hear it, and she answered by poking her elbow into his ribs.

They were led to the bathing rooms for boys and for girls. Frances hesitated at the door to the boys’ room, but Mike shoved her, and she stumbled inside to find the room empty.

“The other children have already bathed,” Mrs. Minton said. “There’s plenty of hot water in the tub, and be sure to wash well behind your ears. You’ll find clothes and shoes in all sizes on the shelves along the far wall. If you want any help, just call.”

“We won’t need any help!” Frances said quickly.

“Then I’ll lend a hand to the girls. As soon as you’ve dressed, just open the door, and I’ll return,” Mrs. Minton said. She shut the door behind her as she left.

“Being as we’re all boys, shouldn’t we all get into the tub together?” Mike asked with a grin.

“Unless you’d like another bloody nose, which I could well give you, you’ll sit with Danny and Petey on that bench, backs to the tub, until I’ve finished,” Frances said with such determination that Mike put a quick stop to his teasing.

After the baths, the children searched through the
clothing to find clothes and shoes or boots that fit. Petey, Danny, Mike, and Frances were finally outfitted in dark woolen pants and jackets, collarless cotton shirts buttoned under their chins, dark stockings, and high, side-buttoned boots. Because Petey was so young, his shirt had a collar and a wide, navy-blue bow. They opened the door, and Mrs. Minton returned to comb and trim their hair. When she was finished, she lined them up and beamed at them.

“You look wonderful” she said. “Now come and see your lovely sisters.”

Frances and the boys followed her into the next room where Peg and Megan were perched on chairs. “Look at me!” Peg cried. “Look at my beautiful blue dress!”

Frances caught Peg in her arms. “I once saw a girl wearing a coat that was this very shade of blue,” she said. “You’re every bit as beautiful as she was.”