A Girl's Best Friend (7 page)

“Oh, sugar. Fighting is part of loving. And if he wasn’t terrified of hurting you, he wouldn’t have been so angry. He’s a man. And I don’t know a single one of them who deals with fear well.” Marion sighed and stroked back Lorna’s hair.

Lorna choked on a watery laugh. “I’m so mixed up. I don’t know what I’m doing.”

The older woman kissed her temple. “You love him. You’ve been friends for a long time. Too long, I think. You got comfortable and both of you were so wrapped up in your own fears that you never took that next step.”

“Until now.” Lorna pulled back to stare at her. Weren’t they supposed to be comfortable with each other? But it meant never having more, having the deeper connection she’d felt when they were together physically. Maybe the price of comfort was too high.

“And now you’re scared you’ll lose the friend
and
the lover.”

She pressed her lips together to stop the quiver. She
would not
cry anymore. “I think I already did.”

Marion patted Lorna’s arm. “I saw him this morning, sugar. He’s hurting as much as you are right now. But let me tell you, it’ll never be the way it was. It’s too late for that. You can’t be just friends anymore.”

“That’s what I’m afraid of.” Lorna winced. Hadn’t she just been thinking they could go back to that? Hearing Tyrone’s mother say it out loud, she could tell how foolish a thought it had been. Fundamental changes had occurred in their relationship. And God, Tyrone had bought a ring for her. But what did she want? She’d been so busy trying to stuff them back into the same old box that she hadn’t stopped to consider whether or not she still wanted to be in that box.

Marion caught Lorna’s face between her palms, forcing her to meet that dark, knowing gaze. “Listen to me, sugar.
You can’t be just friends anymore
. But you can be a lot more. If you dare. You have to have the guts to reach out and take what you want.”

“I don’t—”

“He’s in love with you, you know.” Marion hammered her point home, not letting Lorna interrupt. “He’s been in love with you for years.”

“I know.” And she did know. She’d lied to herself about the hot lust mixed with sweet emotions she’d always seen in his gaze. What if he never looked at her like that again? God, she’d messed everything up.

Because she was scared. He was right about that. His mom was right, too. She was afraid to let go and believe that he could find her attractive, that he could love her just as she was. Not prettier or skinnier or anything other than what she was. Sweet warmth filled her at the thought. She’d never imagined finding anything as amazing as that from any man, let alone one who rocked her world the way Tyrone did.

She loved him. And not just as a friend. She was
in love with
Tyrone. The truth hit her hard, made her sway. It was terrifying and so wonderful she couldn’t breathe for a moment. Oh. Holy. Jesus.

She’d let her fears get in the way of something precious. She’d let his fears push her away. If she hadn’t been so wrapped up in her own baggage, she would have seen his anger for what it really was. Fear. Fear of hurting her, of her walking away like Sherona had done. Fear of her hurting him, too.

A wry smile tipped up her lips. “We’re quite a pair, aren’t we?”

“I’ve always thought so.” Marion bent to pick up Diamond’s trailing leash as the dog trotted outside and handed it to Lorna.

“I have to fix this.” She took a deep breath and straightened her shoulders.

“Yes, you do. I know for a fact he’ll be home at six o’clock because I’m supposed to drop Diamond off then.” Marion tilted her wrist up to glance down at the face of her watch. “I’ve just remembered I have a conflicting appointment. You’ll take care of it for me, won’t you, sugar?”

They shared a wicked, purely female smile. “Of course.”

“I knew I could count on you.”

Lorna reached out for a hug. “Thank you.”

Marion squeezed her tight and whispered in her ear. “Oh, this comes with strings attached. I expect grandchildren out of this.”

Renewed tears smarted Lorna’s eyes at the thought of having Tyrone’s babies. It was a beautiful thought. She hoped they were like him, with his eyes and his determination. And her heart skipped a beat when she thought of all the naughty, creative ways that Tyrone could come up with to conceive those babies.

“I have to make a quick stop after I leave work, but I’ll be at his house on time.” She had some shopping to do—something she knew would bring Tyrone to his knees. She would need all the advantage she could get.

Marion smoothed a hand down her elegant chignon. “He won’t make it easy for you. Remember, he’s just as scared as you are. Even if he’ll never admit it.”

Lorna nodded. She and Tyrone were both terrified to mess this up. They had already messed it up, but it was worth the risk, loving a man like him. Her fingers dipped into her pocket to clench around the ring he’d left at her apartment last night.

She had to fix this.

He was right. About everything.

Chapter Four

She was right. About everything.

The thought had echoed in Tyrone’s head all day. Even now, as he tried to keep up with his older brother in a less-than-friendly game of basketball, there was no pushing Lorna from his mind. All Tyrone had done today was go through the motions, and try to burn off as much of his agony as possible.

Eli grunted as Tyrone drove an elbow into his gut, snatched the ball away, and lobbed it toward the hoop. He missed.

Figured.

Even a perfect, sunny day at the park did nothing to lift his mood. He hadn’t wanted to come here, but had had no ready excuse when his older brother showed up with a basketball. Sweat poured down Tyrone’s face, and he grabbed the bottom of his shirt to swipe at it. There was a bit of blood on the fabric. Yeah, the game had gotten a little rough. His fault, if he were honest. He’d pushed his brother too hard, too far.

Scooping up the loose ball, Eli dribbled in for a shot and Tyrone came at him to block. Eli faked, Tyrone followed, and a wrestling match ensued. Sharp jabs of knees, shoulders, and elbows stung, but both men were large enough and strong enough to hold their own in a fight.

“Okay, I’m done.” Eli shoved the ball at Tyrone’s chest and stepped back, his hands raised in surrender. “I promised not to bring up…things…when I dragged you out here, but I didn’t volunteer to get my ass kicked in the name of your misery.”

Tyrone grunted, but had no argument.

Eli opened his mouth to say more, but then sighed and shook his head.

Tyrone got the impression his big brother was disappointed in him, but he really couldn’t muster up the will to care. He wandered over to flop down on a bench while Eli sucked down gulps of water from the nearby drinking fountain.

Despair rode Tyrone hard, weighing down his bones. Now that he wasn’t moving, wasn’t trying to outrun his desolation, Lorna shoved to the forefront of his mind. He’d lost his best friend because he couldn’t keep his dick in his pants. Pain ripped through him at the thought of her growing away from him, finding some other man. Jealousy and agony delivered twin punches to his heart, but he forced himself to face it. Made himself picture her with some nameless, faceless man who could never love her the way Tyrone did, but who had a nice, safe job and came home to her every night. Made love to her. Gave her babies.

He buried his face in his hands, pressing his thumbs to his eyes. He wanted to curl into a fetal position and howl like a wounded animal. He’d lost her. Oh God, he’d lost her.

Less than a day without her and he felt…hollow. Empty. The hours, days, weeks, and years stretched out before him in one endless string of time. Meaningless. How the hell would he survive this? It felt like his heart had been ripped beating from his chest.

“Come on, man. Let’s get you home.” Eli’s hand closed over Tyrone’s shoulder, his grip and tone far gentler than Tyrone deserved.

He pushed himself to his feet, thankful that Eli seemed content to remain silent as they trudged slowly home. The sweat had dried and he felt almost normal by the time they walked into his house. Physically normal, anyway. Emotionally…there was no normal anymore.

“Pizza for dinner? Or Chinese, maybe?” Eli tossed the ball toward the couch and headed for the kitchen. “We could order delivery.”

Just the mention of pizza made Tyrone recall Santino’s and the erotic torment of having dinner there with Lorna. Had it only been the night before? Now, the idea of food turned his stomach, and he called after Eli, “You don’t have to stay. I’m not really fit company.”

His brother came back into view, concern clear in his gaze. “I know. That’s why I think I should stay.”

“Jesus Christ.” Tyrone snorted. “I’m not going to end it all, man.”

Clinical eyes examined him, the physician side of his brother apparent. “No, but you’re clearly experiencing a depressive episode. Leaving you alone with your thoughts would only let you spiral into some very bad places. Company is what you need, even if it isn’t what you want.”

“Thanks for the analysis, doctor,” Tyrone drawled. “Though last time I checked, you weren’t a shrink.”

“I did my psych round like everyone else.” Eli winked and spun away. “It doesn’t take a psychologist to figure out what’s wrong with you anyway.”

Before Tyrone could retort, a knock sounded on his door, followed by a dog’s bark. That would be his mother with Diamond. He sighed. He didn’t want to see her because she was going to want to talk about what had happened with Lorna. And that was the last thing he wanted to do. Ever. He couldn’t imagine a time when he could discuss what had transpired without wanting to kick his own ass. Mom
plus
Eli tag-teaming him about his feelings? Fuck. He rubbed a hand over the back of his neck.

Pulling open the door, he saw Lorna with her hair dancing in wild curls and a clingy black dress wrapped around her lush curves. All the blood in his brain rushed south, and his heart hammered in his chest. He jerked his gaze away and focused on his dog. That was why she was here, to drop off Diamond. That’s all she really wanted from him. Nothing more. Damn it.

Holding the door wide, he snapped his fingers. “In, Diamond.”

She barked and raced inside the house. Tyrone blinked as Lorna used the opportunity to slip in, too.

His brother wandered into the living room, chugging a bottle of water. “Hey, Lorna.”

“Hi, Eli.” She waved to the door. “Bye, Eli.”

He took the unsubtle hint with a gracious smile, but his gaze searched her face for something. Apparently satisfied with whatever he found in her expression, his smile widened. “I was just leaving. So sorry I don’t have time to visit.”

“That is such a shame.” She grinned back.

He popped a kiss on her cheek. “Go get him, tiger.”

With those words of encouragement, Eli picked up his basketball and headed for the exit.

“Traitor,” Tyrone growled as his brother pushed past him. The truth was, he didn’t trust himself to be alone with Lorna right now. Anything he said would likely make their situation worse.

“Love you, too, bro.” Not bothering to glance back, Eli waved over his shoulder while he beat a hasty retreat to his car. “Trust me, she’s better company for you than I am. Later!”

Tyrone’s hand clenched on the doorjamb before he shut the door and turned to follow Lorna as she disappeared into the kitchen. She stood in the middle of the room waiting for him, looking so lovely and perfect it made his heart ache.

Fisting his fingers, he kept himself from reaching for her. His voice came out gruffer than he’d intended. “What do you want?”

“You.”

He blinked down at her and shook his head to clear it. “Excuse me?”

Tilting her head, she smiled. “You asked what I want. I want you.”

He fought a groan as his dick swelled to rub against his fly at that announcement. It wasn’t enough. Not nearly enough. He closed his eyes for a moment, sucking in a steadying breath. “We need to talk, baby. I don’t want to hurt you any worse than I already have.”

Her chin dipped in a slight nod. She let out a deep sigh, her lips twisting into a moue as she brushed a hand down her dress. “I’m not like Sherona.”

Anger bubbled inside him. “Oh, Christ. Here we go again. When are you going to see that I
love
the way you look?”

She held up her palm. “Please, let me finish. I’m not talking about my weight right now. What I meant is that I can handle your job. I know I wigged out last night, but I’ve been pretty messed up the last few days. This has happened really fast for me.”

“It’s taken years for me.”

“I know. We’re on seriously different timetables.” She shrugged and met his gaze, her eyes open and frank. “You know…it wasn’t just me letting my fears get in the way. It was you, too.”

“I’m not the one—”

“The second I reacted like Sherona did, you flipped out. You assumed I couldn’t take it. Well, I have news for you, Tyrone. I’ve been taking it for years, and you know it. So
listen to me
this time. You think I’m not scared when you go to work? You think I didn’t worry before? It’s part of the job, loving you. So, yeah. I worry. I’m always going to worry. If I didn’t care enough about your safety to worry, you’d have a lot more problems than whether or not I can stand you being SWAT.”

He nodded slowly. It hurt, acknowledging what she said was true. He had been scared. Terrified to hurt her. Terrified to lose her. She’d always been an essential part of him, and the thought of her being hurt devastated him. And if he’d been the one doing the hurting… God help him.

She took a step closer, until he could feel the heat of her luscious curves. “But no matter how concerned I am for you, I would never ask you to quit, Tyrone. I am not like Sherona. I know your work is a part of what makes you
you
.”

“I love you.” He said it because he had to. He couldn’t keep it in anymore. How long he’d kept the words back, he’d never know. He’d been fighting it and ignoring it for so long, it was just second nature. But that was gone, and the words wouldn’t stay unspoken.