A Home for Christmas (18 page)

Jenna giggled.  She felt too good to take
him to task for his smugness.  The water was warm and soothing, his arms
were strong and comforting.  She knew she could have easily spent the rest
of her life right there where she was and have been perfectly happy.

"I never want to let you go," she
whispered to him.

Riley looked up from her body to meet her
gaze.  She saw the heat and intensity in the green depths of his eyes and
knew she never wanted to lose this moment.

"I'm not going anywhere, Jenna. 
Ever," he vowed, and she knew from his tone and the sincerity on his face,
that he meant every last word of it.

Cam woke in the morning and went into the
kitchen, surprised and pleased to see his mom and Riley sitting at the
breakfast bar together.  Riley was wearing a t-shirt and a pair of sweats,
feet bare, letting Cam know that he had in deed, stayed all night last
night.  His mom was sitting close to Riley and her eyes were shining
bright as she smiled.  His mom smiled a lot anyway, but Cam couldn't
remember her eyes ever shining like they were now. 

"Hey, bud, good morning!" his mom said,
turning her attention toward him.  "Did you sleep well?"

He crossed over to them and sat on the stool
beside Riley.

"Yeah.  No dreams that I
remember."

"Good deal.  What do you want for
breakfast?  Waffles, pancakes, burritos?"

He shrugged.  "Whatever."

Jenna's eyes cut over to him, concerned by his
response.  He seemed fine to her, but he normally had an opinion as to
what he ate.  She met Riley's gaze and started to say something but Riley
subtly shook his head, stopping her.

"What do you want to do today?" Riley
asked Cam.

Cam was quiet a minute, then looked up at
Riley.  "Can we go shopping?  I need to get a couple of
Christmas presents."

"Sure, we can do that."

He turned to look at Jenna.  "And, Mom,
can it just be me and Riley for one part, and then just you and me for the
other?  I mean, we can all go together, but separate a couple of
times?"

Jenna smiled, knowing what he was wanting to do. 
"Sure thing, bud."  She placed a plate of waffles before
him.  "Eat up then get ready to go.

"OK."

When they were all showered and dressed to go,
they loaded into what  she learned was actually Riley's truck, again a
Ford Raptor like Aaron's, minus the monster truck kit, and headed to the
mall.  Riley drove up to the entrance and parked there to let them unload.

"I've got to run to the office for just a
bit, so why don't y'all do your shopping together first and then when I get
back, we can split up again.  Sound good?"

Cam nodded and scrambled out of the truck. 
Jenna looked across the cab at Riley, assessing him.

"I'm sorry we're making you miss work,"
she said tentatively.

He smiled and shook his head.  "Not
missing anything.  Just something I need to take care of there. 
Won't take long.  I'll call you when I get back."

"Mom!  Let's go!" Cam called.

She leaned across the seat and gave Riley a quick
kiss and then got out.

"See you soon," he told her.

"So, what do you want to get?" she
asked Cam.  "Something for Riley, I'm assuming?"

"Yeah, but I'm not sure what. 
Something special."

She smiled down at him.  "I want to get
him something special, too.  Let's see what we can come up with."

They walked the mall several times, went in and
out of every store there almost.  They bought a few little things for
Riley, but couldn't find the one thing that they thought would be extra special
just for him.  By the time Riley called to say he was on his way, they
were both discouraged.

"Nothing is good enough, Mom," Cam
sighed when they sat at the food court to wait for Riley.

"We have a couple of days still.  We
will think of something."

"Mom!  Christmas is on Friday!"

"I know.  We'll figure something
out.  Until then, we've got some good things here to go under the tree for
him."

Cam sighed.  "Yeah, I know...but I want
to find something really special.  Do you think he'll stay?"

She felt her heart melt at his question. 
"You mean, with us?"  Cam nodded.  "He's told me several
times he wasn't planning on going anywhere.  Ever."  She watched
Cam's face light up.  "You like Riley a lot, don't you?"

"He's really cool...it'd be cool to have
him...you know, be like, my step-dad," he said, slightly ducking his head,
embarrassed.

"Well, I've been thinking about that, too,
and I think, maybe, I've come up with something to do about that."

Cam's face beamed.  "Really?"

"I think so.  I'll look while you and
Riley do your shopping, OK?"

"It's something you can get here at the
mall?" Cam asked, confused.

"Well, part of it anyway."

"Part of what?" Riley asked, coming up
beside them.  He leaned down and kissed Jenna, then winked at Cam.

"Nothing," Jenna dismissed, "do we
want to eat here now, or wait until after we leave?"

"I want to wait," Cam said, hopping up
out of his chair.  "Come on, Riley."

Riley chuckled.  "Yeah, OK.  Jen,
you OK for now?"

She smiled.  "Oh, yeah, I'm fine. 
I still have a couple of Cam presents to snag so this will be a good
opportunity.  You boys have fun."

"Keep your phone handy," Riley told
her.  He kissed her quickly then he and Cam were off.

"I need to get Mom a couple of things,"
Cam told Riley as they walked off.  "I always get her a new ornament
for the Christmas tree every year.  I saw one at the Hallmark store that
would be perfect for this year."

"All right, let's go there," Riley
said, "lead the way."

He followed Cam into the Hallmark store and over
to where the Christmas ornaments were.  Riley was stunned when the two
ornaments Cam pulled from the display boxes were one of the SEAL trident, and
one of a Navy Sailor figurine.

Cam looked up at Riley with a shy smile. 
"I always get her something that represents an event that took place
sometime during the year. I thought she'd like to have you represented on our
tree."

"Wow, bud, that's..." Words flew from
his mind.  He was overwhelmed and humbled and touched that Cam, a ten-year
old kid, would think of something like that.  It meant just as much, if
not more, to Riley that Cam was including him in their life like that.

"Is that OK with you?" Cam asked, a bit
concerned.

Riley smiled then.  "It's
perfect.  It will actually go along with what I have planned for your mom
on Christmas...but it's something I need your help with."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah, I'll tell you when we leave
here."

After checking out, where Riley was impressed
that Cam paid for both ornaments with his own money, he led Cam over to a bench
and then faced him.

"I was wondering, Cam, how you would feel
about me giving this to your mom," he said, pulling a diamond ring from
his pocket to place in Cam's hand.  Cam's eyes widened and he looked from
his hand up into Riley's face.

"You want to marry my mom?" he asked,
his voice barely above a whisper.

Riley nodded.  "Yeah...but I wanted to
clear it with you first.  Sort of, ask your permission, seeing as how you
are the Man of the House and all...because, if I ask your mom to marry me, if
she says yes, then that means I'm a part of your life, too, and I want you to
feel comfortable with that.  I know I'm not your dad, but I'd really like a
shot at being your step-dad, because it's not just your mom that I love, Cam. 
You get what I'm saying?"

Cam sat for a minute and Riley wasn't sure what
was going through the kid's mind.  Suddenly uncaring that they were in a
crowded mall, Cam launched himself into Riley's arms, hugging him tight. 
Riley laughed and returned Cam's hug just as tightly.

"I take it that's a yes?"

Cam nodded, pulling back so he could look Riley
in the eye.

"Yes, sir."

Riley smiled.  "You think your mom will
like that ring?  It was my grandmother's.  That's where I went today. 
Not to work.  I'm thinking about giving that to her for Christmas. 
Either on Christmas Eve or Christmas Morning." 

"Do it on Christmas Eve," Cam said,
"Mom gets all sappy about traditions and things on Christmas Eve...she'll
like getting this then."

"All right, then.  Christmas Eve it
is," he said, taking the ring back from Cam and shoving it into his
pocket.  "But I need to get her a couple more gifts for under the
tree. Got any ideas?"

"A couple," Cam said.

They started off, shopping together and enjoying
each other's company.  Cam was happier than he ever remembered
being.  Knowing that Riley was going to be a part of their lives from now
on, that he wanted him as well as his mother was the most awesome feeling in
the world.  He didn't think anything could bring him down off the high he
was feeling just then.

But that was where he was wrong.

***

Wade paced in his room like a caged animal. 
Detox was a bitch and it was not going well for him at all.  He hated the
shaky feeling he was left with. Hated the time on his hands where all he did
was think.  That was part of the reason why he'd started taking drugs in
the first place; so he wouldn't have to think about all the shit things he'd
done since becoming a big name on the circuit.  He'd let the fame go to
his head and it cost him the only woman he'd ever loved.  He'd acted like
a damn idiot and was on the verge of losing his son. 

The stupid doctors and facility director wouldn't
let him call Cam.  He needed to talk to his boy.  He needed to be
able to set things straight with him.  He hadn't meant to neglect him all
these years.  Things just...happened.  The circuit kept him busy and truth
be told, he avoided seeing Cam because he didn't want to see Jenna; didn't want
to be reminded of what he'd been stupid enough to walk away from. 
Christmas was coming up, though, and he wanted to see Cam; he needed to see his
son.

Collapsing down on his bed, he buried his face in
his hands.  He had really screwed up his life.  Jenna was lost to him
now, he knew that; but he had to figure out how to save his relationship with
his son.

A knock sounded on his door and he saw a very
attractive, petite blonde woman step inside.  She had a visitor's badge on
her lapel which labeled her as a counselor.

"Mr. Blackwell, I'm Lainey Riley.  I'm
wondering if you would talk with me for a bit."

He scrubbed a weary hand over his face. 
"About what?"

"Your ex-wife, Jenna Blackwell, has retained
me to counsel your son, Cameron."

He sat up slightly straighter.  "You're
counseling Cam?"

She sat in the chair across from his bed,
gracefully crossing her ankles and tucking her legs beneath her chair. 

"I am...and Cam wanted me to talk to
you."

He scrubbed his palms on his thighs. 
"OK."

"May I call you Wade?"

"Yeah, sure."

"Wade...Cam is extremely upset with
you.  He had some issues prior to Sunday, but once he was kidnapped
because of your activities...well, let's just say he is not in a good place
right now where you're concerned."

Wade nodded.  "I never meant things to
get as out-of-control as they got."

"The kidnapping was just the tip of the
iceberg with Cam, unfortunately. He misses you, but his anger toward you is strong."

Wade lowered his head.  "I screwed
up."

"Yes," she agreed, "but I believe
it's not too late for you to save your relationship.  Are you willing to
work at fixing it?"

"I'd give anything."

Lainey smiled at him.  "Then I think
there may be hope for you yet."

"So, Cam tells me Christmas Eve is kind of a
big deal around here," Riley said to Jenna when they got home from
shopping.

She smiled.  "Well, I try to make it
special.  We have a little routine.  We make Christmas cookies during
the day and watch Christmas movies.  When it gets dark, we head to City
Park and go through the lights display with thermoses of hot chocolate. 
When we leave there, we go by my parents and sing Christmas carols and listen
to my dad read the Christmas Story.  Then we come home and I usually let
him open one gift, then we curl up together and watch The Polar Express before
he goes to bed."

"Has he never spent Christmas Eve with Wade
since the divorce?"

"Nope.  Not that I would ever consent
to give up Christmas, but Wade has never asked, either.  He usually spends
Christmas on an island somewhere."

"Except for this year, huh?"

"Yes, except for this year."

"Did Lainey tell you she was going to see
him today?" Riley asked.

"To see Wade?"

Riley nodded.  "She said Cam asked her
to talk to his dad."

Jenna took a deep breath.  "That's
good.  He needs all the help he can get."

Riley studied her a moment.  "How did
you find out he was cheating on you?"

"Little things at first.  He'd stay at
the track longer than normal.  When he'd go on tour, he used to call me
every night before he went to bed.  Those calls became less and less until
they ultimately stopped.  The night it all came out, he'd just made the
finals for the big event in Vegas.  It was the first time and I wanted to
be there with him.  So, my parents kept Cam and I hopped a flight and
thought to surprise him at his hotel.  Gary let me into his room. 
Imagine my surprise when my husband comes stumbling into the suite with two
little bimbos hanging on each side of him."

He reached out and gently trailed the backs of
his fingers along her cheek.  "I'm so sorry, Jen.  You shouldn't
have had to deal with that."

She waved her hand in dismissal. 
"Well, it wasn't like there weren't all the other little signs that let me
know he was slipping away.  That was why I'd felt it necessary to be there
in the first place.  Because I knew...I
knew
there was something
going on."

"What did you do when they came into the
room?"

"I stood staring at him for a minute,
listening to him try to stutter out an apology.  Then I quietly turned and
went into the bedroom, got my suitcase and walked out.  I had the
concierge arrange a shuttle for me back to the airport.  Went home. 
Talked to my dad the next morning, met with his attorney and filed for divorce
that day.  Wade came home after the finals, after he'd been served with
divorce papers, but I'd already moved out.  He tried to plead his case,
tried to beg me not to go, but there was no way I was staying."  She
shook her head and then narrowed her eyes at Riley, pointing a finger at him,
to which he held up his hands in supplication.

"Don't even go there, lady," he
laughed, "I know a good thing when I've got it."

"You'd better!" she told him.

"I do, I promise."

She took his chin in her hand and leaned forward
to kiss him.  "Good thing you're so cute."

"And irresistible?"

She laughed.  "Yes."

"And charming?"

"Yes!"

"And..."

"MOM!!!!!" Cam yelled, jolting them
from their teasing mood.  Jenna slid off the stool and started toward his
room when she heard his door slam.  "MOM!!!!"

"What?  Geez, I'm right here,
what...?"

He thrust his phone out at her. 
"Dad," he growled.

Jenna took a deep breath and took the phone from
him.  She looked over to Riley who took her cue and rounded Cam up, taking
him outside to throw the football.

"What do you want, Wade?" she asked,
her voice flat.

"Look, Jenna...I'm sorry for all the shit
you've been taking from me for the last few years...I talked to Cam's
counselor, to Lainey, and I just...I want to make things right with Cam."

She sighed and sat down, raking her hand through
her hair.  "Wade...I respect that, I do.  But...Cam has a lot of
anger toward you, Wade.  Surely, Lainey told you that."

"She did...and she told me not to call him
but I couldn't help it.  I just..."

"That is where you mess up.  You always
think of yourself first.  Lainey has only had one session with Cam. 
One.  He's not ready to deal with you just yet.  You can't undo five
years of damage after just one counseling session.  It doesn't work that
way."

"It's Christmas.  I just want to see my
kid."

"This isn't about what you want, Wade. 
Not any more.  I'll talk to Lainey.  If she thinks it's a good idea,
then I'll consider it.  But if she says he isn't ready, then you're going
to have to live with that, do you hear me?"

He sighed.  "Yeah.  I hear
you."

"And do not call Cam again until Lainey
clears it, do you understand?  If you want to talk to him, you call me
first.  For once, put your son first."

"That's low."

"Is it?  When's the last time you put
Cam before your career?"

"I have to make a living!"

"And so do I.  But I find time to do
things with him.  I realize my career doesn't have me travelling like
yours does, but there are ways you could include him.  Ways you could
participate with him.  You just need to figure that out."

"I still want to see him.  I need to
talk to him."

"I'll talk to Lainey and see what she
says.  That's all I can promise."

"OK.  Thanks.  Will you, will you
tell him I love him?"

She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. 
"Yeah, OK.  I'll call you after I've talked to Lainey."

She ended the call and just sat for a minute with
her eyes closed.  She could hear Cam and Riley outside, laughing.  At
least she could take comfort in the fact that Riley could get him out of his
funk.

She pulled her phone out of her pocket and pulled
up Lainey's number.

"Jenna?  What can I do for you?"

"Wade just called Cam, and Cam is pretty
upset."

"Oh, no.  I told him not to call Cam
yet."

Jenna sighed.  "Well, that's
Wade.  Impatient as always."

"Do you want me to come talk to Cam?"

"Would you mind?  He's outside with
Riley right now, and he seems fine, but...Wade knows how to push his
buttons."

"I'm free now.  I'll be there in about
fifteen minutes, OK?"

"Thanks, Lainey, I really appreciate
it."

"No problem.  Tell Riley I need him to
check something on my car, while I'm there."

"Will do.  Thanks, Lainey."

She sat for a few moments to collect her
thoughts, then went outside to watch her boys playing football.  She loved
seeing how Cam played with Riley, how carefree and happy he was.  And her
heart absolutely melted at seeing Riley, such a big, macho, tough guy playing
with her small-for-his-age son.

Riley saw her watching them and jogged over to
her, concern on his face.

"Everything OK?"

"I called Lainey.  She's coming over to
talk to Cam.  She said she needs you to look at her car, too."

Riley nodded.  Then looked over to Cam.

"He's angry, but he's trying not to let it
show.  You know what he told me?  He doesn't like being angry because
he doesn't want his friends to accuse him of having Little Man's
Syndrome."

Jenna gasped, tears filling her eyes.  Riley
leaned forward and kissed her brow and drew her into his arms.

"It's gonna be OK, Jen."

"What's wrong?" Cam asked, coming to
stand beside them.  "Did Dad say something to make you cry?"

Jenna pulled back from Riley and wiped tears from
her cheeks.  "No, honey, everything's OK.  Lainey is coming to
talk to you in a few minutes."

"If it's about Dad she can forget it. 
I don't want to talk about him."

"Cam...honey, I know you're angry with him,
but..."

"Don't defend him, Mom.  I've had it
with him.  I'm tired of his promises that he never keeps.  I'm tired
of him asking what I think about what he did in his last race or what he said
in an interview.  I'm just tired of him.  All he cares about is
himself.  I don't want to see him and I don't want to talk to him."

"Cam, I understand you're upset,
but..."

"But nothing, Mom!  I don't want to
talk about him!"

Before Jenna could speak, Riley put his hand on
Cam's shoulder, firm but not rough.

"Listen up, bud.  I get you're upset,
and I think you're perfectly within your rights to be...but don't take your
anger out on your mom.  She's not the cause of it and you don't need to
speak to her like that.  You hear me?"

Jenna held her breath.  This was the first
time that Riley had stepped into a parenting role with Cam and she wasn't sure
how Cam would react to it.  She watched his eyes heat and his nostrils
flare, but then she watched him look up at Riley and nod his head.

"Yes, sir," he replied, his tone terse.

They heard a car pull into the drive and knew
that Lainey was there.  Riley gave Cam's shoulder a squeeze then said he
would go greet her and bring her around back.  Jenna watched Cam as he
watched Riley walk away.  His shoulders were hunched and she knew he was
still upset.

"Cam?"

"Yeah?"

"Yes, ma'am," she prompted.

He sighed.  "Yes, ma'am?"

"Don't be mad at me and Riley.  We
haven't done anything to you.  That's the point Riley was trying to
make."

"I know.  It's all Dad's fault. 
Now Riley's mad at me."

"Look at me," she demanded, and waited
for him to obey before continuing.  "Riley is not mad at you. 
He was just trying to get you to realize that even though you are angry, it is
never good to take your anger out on innocent people, and it is never good to
speak to me with disrespect.  Or to any adult for that matter."

"Dad wants me to come to the rehab center on
Christmas Eve...but, Riley and I made special plans for Christmas Eve."

"Well, then your dad will just have to
understand that you already have plans."

Cam looked up at her, eyes wide with
surprise.  "You won't make me go?"

"Honey, when have I ever made you drop your
plans to do something your dad has pulled at the last minute?"

"Well, I just thought, with him being in
rehab and all alone for Christmas that you might make me go."

Lainey walked up to them then, a soft smile on
her face. 

"Hey, Cam, how are you?" Lainey asked.

"OK," he replied, his voice barely
above a mumble.

"Cameron," Jenna admonished.

"Geez, Mom, give me a break," Cam
snapped.

"Excuse us a moment, please, Lainey. 
Cameron.  Come here," Jenna snapped at him, grabbing him by the neck
and steering him away from where Lainey stood.

"Mom," he groaned.

"Stop right now," she told him. 
"You're mad at your dad.  I get that.  Riley got on to you not
five minutes before for being disrespectful to me.  I can't believe you
have turned around and done it again, even after Riley said something to
you."

"I don't want to talk about Dad.  I don't
want to think about Dad.  I don't want to deal with any of this!"

Across the way, Riley had just re-entered the
backyard when he heard Cam's latest outburst.  He started to walk over to
where mother and son were in a stand-off but Lainey stopped him.

"Let Jenna sort it out," she told him.

"He doesn't need to..."

"Riley," Lainey cautioned him,
"don't."

He wanted to protest but trusted Lainey's
judgment and stood back to allow Jenna to deal with Cam's outburst.  After
several moments, Jenna led Cam back to where he and Lainey stood.  Jenna
looked tired.  Cam still looked belligerent.

"Sorry about that, Lainey," Jenna
said. 

"It's OK.  Cam? Your dad called you
today?"

"He wants to see me on Christmas Eve...but
Riley and I made plans for Christmas Eve."

"For the evening," Riley spoke
up.  "If you want to visit your dad..."

"But I don't," Cam cut in. 
"I want to be with you and Mom."

"Cameron, don't interrupt when someone is
talking," Jenna admonished.  "And if you go see your dad that
day, Riley and I will be right there with you, I promise."

"I don't want to see him."

"I talked to your dad today," Lainey
told him.  "He's really sorry for the way things have been between
the two of you."