A Kachina Dance (4 page)

“Yes, harmony and peace are what I’m feeling.
I read somewhere that in the Hopi dictionary the word
Hopi
means ‘one who is civilized, mannered, peaceful,
polite
and adheres to the Hopi way.’
Or something close to that.”

“At one time the word
Hopi
was
synonymous with
peace and the
Pueblo peoples.  We
’ve always
respect
ed
all things and are in accord
with all things
,
which
is our way
.
”

“Maybe that’s why
I wasn’t looked on as an
interloper today
.
Although
I
’m
sure
being
with
you
had more to do with it
.”

“
We are really
a
very hospitable
people if you respect our ways.
I had nothing to do with it.
You abided by what was expected. Now
,
where should we eat?
Or maybe I should
ask
what do you want to do next and then I’ll know where I can take you to eat?”

“Oh, you don’t have to work this afternoon?
  Oh,
super
…in that case…I’d love to visit Hopi artists that sell their work. I
was hoping to buy some
carved
K
achinas
,
maybe some baskets
, and some pottery for myself.
The buyer in the museum shop asked me to pick up some samples of things that
she thought might sel
l in NYC. Does that sound OK
?
I was going to do this on my own
exce
pt I was going to go to shops.
Since you know artists, you cou
ld take me to the best people.
Oh, and last but not least
,
I want to see your paintings.
Please don’t frown;
we don’t have to do any of it
,
except
see
your paintings.
”

“Kate, you sound like yo
u’re
still running on New York time.
How about trying Hopi
time?”

“Do I sound that wound up?
Why don’t we just go to eat, you pick the place, and we can talk.”

So we head
to the main highway
and f
ind
a little
lunch
eo
nette
on the
side of the road
that serves Hopi tacos and tostadas.
I order
eggs
,
toast and coffee.
Jay settles
o
n
piki
bread with
noqkwivi
,
a lamb stew
with hominy,
and coffee.

“I just realized how much
coffee Native Americans drink.
It’s a
scorcher to
day and everybody i
n here is drinking hot coffee.
If you go to any other part of Arizona
, as soon as you go into a restaurant, the waitress comes along and offers you ice
d
tea.”

He
gives
that slight smile of his
.

“It’s good to see you smile
, yo
u seem to be a serious person.
I’m usually out with babbling idiots.
I just have to go back to what we spoke of earlier when leaving the home dance.
I t
hink to be seen with you accorded
me approval
at the ceremony
today.
It showed
respect for you.
”

“Me? I hold no promi
nent place in the
community.”
He looks at me with a mystified look.

“You know as well as I do that stature isn’t about elected positions.”

He shakes his head and takes a swallow of coffee.
“
Let’s change the subject. Tell me about you
.
Anyone you
’
r
e
engaged to? Married to? Divorced from?”

“No, no, and no
” I smile
.
“I’ve been
so busy building a career I
have
n’t taken
time for r
omance.
Now that I’m 31
, I’m starting to get worried.  I’d like to have a husband and a family…there I said it.”

“What does
an attractive woman
like you
with a glamorous job in New York have to worry about?”

“Please
ask
my mother.
She’ll give you a list.
My biological clock is ticki
ng, she’d be sure to tell you.
Now, I’d like to change the subject.
What ideas do you have for this afternoon?”
 

“I had thought we could ride up into the mounta
ins and I could show you sites
you wouldn’t see in the tour books.”

“Oh, that sounds perfect
.
I was going to ask you
to take me to the mountains but then
…
”

“What?” He cocks his head.

“Well, you know
,
I though
t I was just being too pushy…
N
ew
Y
ork
pushy.”
  I laugh.

“Ok, so that’s settled.”

“B
ut what about seeing your paintings?”

“Let’s save that for tomorrow.”
He grins
and I feel all tingly.

“Tomorrow?
You mean
you won’t be working tomorrow?
We’ll have another day together?”

“Yeah, I h
ave
a friend cover
ing
for me this
weekend.
As far as
the week, I’ll have to work
till
5:00
. But
I c
an take you to see artists then,
if that’s what you want.”
 

I must look
tota
lly surprised because I am
.
No guy had ever rearranged his schedule to suit my needs
…
and
this was
a guy who made me coffee at dawn
to drink while the sun was
just starting to blush. I’m sure my mouth must have dropped
open
.

“I’m a little overwhelmed at your reshuffli
ng your life to accommodate me; this
is something that doesn’t happen
to me.
I
f you like
be
ing with me that’s great but if its
Hopi hospitality, I’d rather be on my
own.”

“I don’t say thin
gs I don’t mean.”
His words a
re as direct as his eyes.

We leave the café and spend
the afternoon
high
in the mountains
.
Like the day before it is
another day of long, lingering conversation that ranged from philosophy to
our favorite music.
We
stop
for some gas, Jay buys
some cold beers and
chips and we dri
ve to a sec
l
uded ridge
to watch a
breathtaking
suns
et
over the desert
.

“What happe
ned with your divorce?”
I ask as we settle
under a shady tree.

“I found my wife cheating on me.”

“Ouch
, how
painful.”

“It
wasn’t much of a marriage
.
See
,
when I left Manhattan my mother was dying o
f cancer.
She had this wish to
see me married before she died.
Can you see where this is going?
”
He gave me that slight smile.
“
I started seeing
t
his woman I had dated in high school
.
She
had just been jilted by her boyfriend.”

I make a groaning sound
.
“Please don’t tell me you married her and then she got back together with her
old
boyfriend.”

“Bingo.”

“Oh, Jay, for a smart guy, that was pretty dumb. Ugh, ho
w could you not see the folly?
Did you love her?”

“No, not really.
I was still wet behind the ears
.
I hadn’t dated much. I wanted to please my mother.
It was her dying wish.
You see I was the
only son that stayed on the
rez
;
my o
ther two
brothers
left home
lookin
’ for work and never came back
. What can I say?”

“Just one more question…
well
, maybe two.  Do you have children?  And is she from here?”

“No children and yes
,
she was Hopi.”

             
“The Hopi society is based on matriarchal clans, am I right?”

             
“I thought there were no more questions.” He
gives his little smile.

             
“Well, OK, I lied.
Just one or two more,
ple
-e-e-e-
ase
.”

             
“Yeah, when a man marries, the children from the union are members of the wife’s clan.”

             
“So it’s important that you marry a Hopi woman, right?”

             
“Kate, why are you asking me these questions?”

             
“No more que
stions
.” I take a deep breath, stand, and walk a few feet. Jay calls to me.
“Kate, where are you going?” I continue walking but answer, “I need a time out.” I tell myself this is crazy why do I feel like crying? I’m acting like a moron.
I’ve just met the guy 2 days ago. Now I’m upset because I know I’ll never be able to marry him.
This is lunacy! Kate, you’re not a schoolgirl or a starry-eyed dreamer. Yet something is pulling me towards him. I turn and look at him
sitting against the tree
and see
how
pensively
he watches
me.
I smile and know I should walk back and say something funny or light but I feel
like I’m on the verge of tears.
“Kate, what’s going on?”

I turn and shrug
my shoulders unable to speak.
There’s a lump in my throat. Don’t cry, oh, please don’t cry. He’ll really think you’
re nuts but the tears start down my cheeks. I hear footsteps behind me. Oh
, shit! Now, what? Wipe the
cheeks, hurry. Think of something funny real fast. He’s
closin
’
in.
I feel
his hands
stop me and
he
turn
s
me around.

             
“What’s
spookin
’ you, Kate?” He wipes my tears with his fingers.

             
“I don’t
know, I guess I
was asking
too many
questions.
I
just got too close.” I can’
t look
at him yet.

“
W
ere my
answers wrong
?” He is playing with my hair.
I can feel his warm breathe. I want him to hold me but he waits.

             
“
U
r…I don’t
know
…um…no, they weren’t wrong, I guess.
  B
ut
little by littl
e you’re sneaking into my heart,
”
I say
knowing I’m probably
blushing.
“It’s making me very emotional as you can see.”