A Peculiar Connection (25 page)

Chapter Thirteen

The infamously rough crossing of the Irish Sea meant that
mal de mer
beset some of the men and most of the ladies on board
The Falcon
, including Mrs. Gardiner, Georgiana, and Mrs. Annesley. Miraculously, I escaped, as did my uncle and Mr. Darcy. I kept busy by directing the maid in tending my aunt for much of the voyage and prayed for deliverance from the treacherous waves. Our passage had surely proved to be a challenge thus far.

At last, however, the storms abated, and we enjoyed smooth sailing. I had been confined below deck for so long that when we were told we might emerge to take the air, I could not wait to climb the stairs. My aunt remained too weak to rise from her bed but for short periods, as did Mrs. Annesley. Georgiana, however, recovered more quickly, and she was as eager as I to distance herself from the detention we had been forced to endure.

The fresh sea air enticed us, and we hastened to the railing to breathe deeply and watch the waves. The ocean appeared much calmer. One found it hard to reconcile the idea that it was the same sea that had tossed us about with such recklessness only the day before. Unexpected, infrequent wind gusts still occurred, however, causing me to catch my breath when the ship pitched sharply.

Georgiana exclaimed when we caught glimpses of the creatures beneath the surface of the water. A number of basking sharks lurked within sight, a fearsome spectacle that covered my arms in gooseflesh.

“Those great, voracious fish are an awesome sight,” Mr. Darcy said, having joined us without my notice.

“Oh, Wills, would it not be dreadful to fall into the sea?”

“All the more reason you must take care and not venture too near the edge. Shall you and Elizabeth join me in a stroll? I could benefit from the exercise.”

“An excellent suggestion,” I said, “for I have been longing for a walk to restore my energy.”

“As well as your spirit, I would wager.” He smiled and offered one arm to his younger sister and one to me.

Several times, we walked the length of the deck as far as passengers were allowed. Before making the final return, we stopped to watch the busy seamen alternating sails and stowing ropes. I craned my neck and shaded my eyes with my hand in order to follow a sailor as he scrambled up the rigging to the mast and climbed into the crow’s nest. What a view he must have had from that lofty perch!

At that moment, the man cupped his hand to his mouth and cried, “Land ho!”

Immediately, all eyes turned westward, where he was pointing. We hurried toward the bow and searched the horizon. Neither my sister nor I could see it, but Mr. Darcy fixed on a faint outline. Georgiana declared she must share the news with Mrs. Annesley, for she felt certain it would aid her companion’s recovery to know our deliverance was nigh. She hastened toward the hatch and soon disappeared below stairs.

Aware that Mr. Darcy and I were alone, I started to withdraw my hand from his arm when suddenly the ship lurched upward and then immediately downward, having encountered a particularly large swell. I felt myself sway and lose my balance. I could not refrain from falling against Mr. Darcy. Instinctively, his arms encircled me. Within moments, he had steadied us both, but not before we had been thrust against each other. The scent of his skin enveloped me. I could feel the powerful strength in his arms, and I began to tremble.

“Do not fear, Elizabeth, you are safe with me,” he said into my ear.

I stepped back, knowing that I was not. Yes, he might protect me from the sea, but who would shield me from the forbidden emotions he unleashed within my heart?

“I…should return to my aunt and see to her needs.”

“If you wish. Allow me to escort you to the stairs.”

“No, I am now quite well, sir. I can make my way unaided.”

Without meeting his gaze, I turned and fled below. Hearing steps behind me, I turned to see that Mr. Gardiner had followed from above deck. He wore a decided frown.

“Uncle, is something wrong?”

“A moment with you, Lizzy, if you please.” He led me into the empty dining hall. “My dear, I question the wisdom of the scene I just witnessed.”

“What scene do you speak of?”

“Finding you within Mr. Darcy’s embrace.”

I felt the heat of a blush rise up my neck and burn my cheeks. “It…happened in all innocence, sir. The sudden movement of the ship almost caused me to fall, and it forced me against the gentleman. He meant no untoward behaviour. He simply attempted to assist me in securing my balance.”

“Yes, I saw it all, Lizzy. He, however, did not release you as quickly as he might have. As we discussed before, I think it best if you avoid his presence as much as possible.”

“That will prove difficult in these confined quarters.”

“Still, I counsel you not to be alone with him.” He patted my shoulder somewhat awkwardly. “I do not accuse Mr. Darcy of impropriety. I simply remind you of the concern your aunt and I expressed in Bath. You must neither encourage nor tempt the gentleman in any manner.”

Tempt him!

I bit my tongue to refrain from making a sharp retort. He said no more and signified that we should return to our cabins. Once my door closed behind me, I sank down upon the narrow bed. For some time, I fumed silently at the suggestion that I had purposely led Mr. Darcy astray or that he had done anything amiss. Eventually, after I calmed myself and took time to examine the situation, I could see the wisdom in my uncle’s words. If Mr. Darcy had not truly renounced his romantic feelings toward me, and if I were honest, I doubted that he had, I should do all in my power to help him accomplish the feat. The question remained: Who would assist
me
in conquering my own love for him?

Oh, why had Mr. Gardiner insisted that I make this trip? We would be thrown together constantly, and I trembled anew at the thrill I had felt when held within Mr. Darcy’s warm embrace. My aunt and uncle were correct. No matter how I would miss him, ’twas more prudent for us to be apart.

The sensible side of me acknowledged that things would be easier once we left the ship, for after we reached Dublin, Mr. Darcy and Georgiana would travel on to Cork.

][

As I have come to learn, what I expected did not happen.

After Mr. Gardiner met with several of his business connections in Dublin, he determined that the majority of the goods my uncle had ordered were literally manufactured in County Cork, and the entire shipment had set sail from the nearby harbour at Cobh. From the intelligence he was given, Mr. Gardiner learned that, if negligence had occurred, it would have transpired in Cork City. Thus, we would be forced to travel south in a hired carriage to the same county where my grandmother had been born and very near the place to which Mr. Darcy journeyed. The moment I heard the name of our destination, my mouth fell open.

“Impossible,” I murmured when Mr. Gardiner told me.
Are Mr. Darcy and I destined to be thrown together?

“We have been invited to dine with Mr. Darcy and his sister tonight, Lizzy,” my aunt said. “But I fear I do not feel well enough to go out.” She had not regained her strength from the sea voyage and had remained inside our lodgings the entire week we had been in Dublin.

“Then I shall stay with you.”

“Oh no, my dear, for you have been confined inside these rooms far too long. You must accompany your uncle this evening.”

“I have been out now and then. Do you not recall that I took a long walk this morning? I watched the traffic on the River Liffey.”

“That is not the same as engaging in good conversation with someone other than me, Lizzy. I insist that you go along with Edward and visit with Miss Darcy. I am certain she longs for your company. She seems to come alive in your presence.”

“As does her brother,” my uncle added.

“That is why I shall remain here, sir,” I announced. “I shall not have you fretting over my being in Mr. Darcy’s company all evening.”

He smiled. “I shall not fret, Lizzy. Mr. Darcy and I have travel plans to discuss. You will not be alone together, so I see no reason for you to decline the invitation.”

Thus, a few hours later, I changed my gown, fussed with my hair, pinched my cheeks, and bade Aunt Gardiner good night, for she said that she would be abed by the time we returned. The carriage transported us from the Norfolk Hotel on the north side of the city into the centre of town. The Darcys were in residence at the exclusive Gresham Hotel on Sackville Street, Dublin’s main thoroughfare.

Inside, candles glowed throughout, casting a shimmering glow over the sumptuous room, accenting its modern splendour. Crystal, fine bone china, and well-polished silver sparkled on every table. I was surprised to find the accommodations rivalled any I had seen in London, for I possessed the English prejudice that Ireland remained a poor, backward nation. Perhaps we would find that to be true in the countryside but certainly not in that area of the capital city.

Mr. Darcy and Georgiana descended the magnificent staircase, and her eyes lit up when she saw us approach from across the room. After greetings were exchanged, we were immediately shown to our table in the main dining room. Mr. Gardiner explained his wife’s absence, and Georgiana sympathized, saying that Mrs. Annesley also still suffered the effects of the trip. The evening passed pleasantly enough, and I noticed that Mr. Darcy seemed in exceptionally good spirits. He was completely at ease with my uncle, and oft times when I looked up, he bestowed a smile upon me.

“Is this not good fortune that we shall travel to Cork together?” he said.

“It will prove beneficial for us,” Mr. Gardiner said, “for now I shall not have to navigate the route alone. I confess I sometimes feel that the Irish do not even speak English. Their brogue garbles the language something fierce, and they appear to use an excessive number of words to convey a single thought. I often feel as if they speak to me in riddles.”

“They do speak their own version of our mother tongue,” Mr. Darcy agreed with a smile. Just then, a hotel porter appeared with a note for him, which he read quickly. “Have the package delivered to my apartment.” The porter bowed and disappeared.

Our meal was drawing to a close when Mr. Darcy asked whether my uncle and I might visit with him in his private rooms above stairs.

“Well, sir, the hour grows late,” Mr. Gardiner answered.

“It will not take long. I wish to show you something that I consider important.”

“Splendid!” Georgiana said. “Elizabeth and I shall not yet be forced to part.”

Mr. Darcy, however, thwarted his young sister’s plans. “You, my dear, must retire for the evening. You have kept far too late hours ever since we arrived. I insist that you rest up for the journey ahead.”

Even though she protested, he remained firm in his decision, and so it was that Mr. Gardiner and I joined Mr. Darcy in the parlour of his lodgings while Georgiana went to her chambers.

After my uncle accepted his offer of sherry and I declined, Mr. Darcy had the servant retrieve a thick packet that had obviously just arrived by post. Placing it upon the table, he opened it quickly. “Perfect! My steward sent precisely what I requested.”

I turned to Mr. Gardiner, who sat beside me on the sofa with a questioning look, but he appeared no more knowledgeable than I.

Mr. Darcy took several bound books from the package and brought them with him as he sat down on the chair nearest the sofa. “These books are what I wished you to see.”

My uncle put down his glass. “Atlases we may use in our travels?

“No, nothing like that. These, sir, are several of my father’s diaries.”

“Diaries!” I said. “I thought our search at Pemberley proved fruitless.”

“We found no additional books that I had not previously canvassed. I did not show you these, Elizabeth, because I did not think they held anything of note concerning your birth. However—”

“You have had second thoughts, sir?” my uncle prodded.

“I have. I read these books for the first time in the year following my father’s funeral. My mood was dark with grief for months after I lost him, and I found solace reading the ordinary jottings my father had made note of through the years. Most entries pertained to management of the estate and his other holdings, but now and then, I was delighted to find lengthy, personal notations about my mother and myself, and in later volumes, he wrote of Georgiana as she grew up. He did not write on a daily basis; he often allowed weeks between posts. But if one reads carefully, one finds a consistent testimony of his life contained therein.”

“And yet, you say that he never mentioned my birth. Then why, sir, have you now changed your mind? Why should these books be of interest to us?”

“Before we left Bath, I began to ponder that question. Why had my father never marked such an important occurrence?”

“Well, naturally, because he wished to keep it hidden.”

“A pertinent conclusion, and one I shared…until I remembered—”

“Remembered what, sir?”

“Pages are missing from these books.”

“Missing? How do you know?”

“See for yourself.” He held a book open for us to see. “Look closely. Can you not see that pages have been torn out? And not just in this book. In several volumes, there are remnants of torn pages left behind.”

Mr. Gardiner took the book from his outstretched hand and examined it closely. “Why should that signify anything of importance, Mr. Darcy? Perchance your father simply made an ink blot and wished to begin anew.”

“A possibility, sir, but as I considered making this journey to Ireland, I also wondered why my father had not told me more about finding his brother after all those years. For that matter, why had he not written more about it in the diaries? Here, observe this one.” He rummaged through the stack until he found a volume marked 1805. “There is but one entry made about Peter Darcy this entire year. Pray, read it aloud, Elizabeth.”

I smoothed the page open and followed his finger to the appointed place.

14 July 1805

Received letter from Henry this date. Peter is alive! He has found him near, of all places, Mother’s birthplace in Ireland. Says he is well. After all these years, I rejoice. My brother, who was dead, is alive. If only he could return to Pemberley, we would kill the fatted calf, put a ring upon his finger, invite the neighbours, and hold a feast. Alas…