A Piece of Me (4 page)

“
And try and clean my
accounts out soon after they do it.”

She found herself offended by his
words. She slammed back against her chair. “So, you want to have a
baby with me, because you think I might be cheaper?”

“
No, Amana, that’s not what
I mean.” He leaned forward, his eyes filled with concern. “You are
the most independent and self supporting person I know. If you have
been planning to have a child on your own, then you’ve put all your
ducks in a row and don’t need someone else. Which means that any
man… no,
me
,” he
corrected himself. “If I do this with you it will be a
partnership.”

The cool shower of relief that rained
down on her caused her to sigh; she understood where he was coming
from. As a successful business man, he had to be careful. She
wondered if she needed to have her head examined because she was
considering the option of having sperm from a man she knew, instead
of some stranger sight unseen. There was no denying she really
wanted a baby, but was Neal the answer?

“
I don’t know…” She shook
her head and glanced away, feeling a little unsure of what to do.
“We work together every day. Don’t you think this will be awkward?”
She looked at him now resting back again. “What will the staff
say?”

“
First of all, I don’t give
a damn what anyone says. We’re two adults who have been managing
our lives without input from others. It’s not against company
policy. Even if it was, it’s my company.”

The server chose that moment to come
in to collect their dinner plates and ask if they were ready for
their dessert. After being told that neither of them wanted dessert
at the moment, the man left carrying the tray filled with
dishes.

“
If you decide to let me do
this with you, I don’t plan to broadcast it in a company memo.
However, neither will I hide it like something I’m ashamed
of.”

That bit of knowledge warmed her
heart, but she still wasn’t completely sold on the idea. She
couldn’t help but voice her major fear. “When this gets out.”
Lowering her gaze to her lap, she watched her own fingers play with
the edge of the napkin as she attempted to put words to her
emotions. “People will believe that we’ve been having a secret
affair for years.”

“
Amana, look at me.” Neal’s
voice was gentle, yet no less commanding.

Raising her head, she peered at him
across the table.

“
You were a dedicated and
loyal wife for years. I’m not the only one who watched you crumble
after your husband lost the fight to cancer. No one who knows you
will doubt your faithfulness.” His eyes were bright with compassion
as his gaze and words seemed to touch her soul.

There was no one else in this world
who understood her like Neal, her boss. They’d always shared a deep
connection. At times, more than she and Kevin and he was her best
friend. Maybe it was because of all the long hours they spent
together or because they leaned on each other during the most
traumatic experience in both their lives. She didn’t know the
reason, and refused to dwell on why the bond was there. Kevin had
seen it. Regardless of Neal’s words, others had too. In his office,
buried under software projects and paperwork, he may have been
oblivious to what went on around them, but she had heard a few
rumors about them over the years.

She just chose to ignore them and take
them for catty gossip. She had been married and Neal in a committed
relationship.

“
Thank you for saying
that.”

“
I meant it. That’s why I
believe you’ll make a great mother and I want to be a part of that
with you. What do you say?”

This was the moment of truth. In all
the months she’d been considering her pregnancy options, she’d
never thought about adding a father in the picture for her child.
But, now one sat before her. Could she do this? How involved would
he want to be?

“
I want to make sure we
both know what the expectations are. What are you
offering?”

“
Besides my sperm?” He
wiggled his eyebrows.

She laughed at his naughty sense of
humor. “Besides that. What do you want? An occasional weekend?
Every other Christmas?” She didn’t want to assume that Neal
Stephens, a successful business man and one of ‘The Queen City’s’
eligible bachelors, was trying to tie his life down with feedings,
play dates and diaper duty.

Placing his hand on the table, palm
side up, he said, “Give me your hand.”

She only hesitated a moment, then slid
her hand into his and tried to ignore the electrical current
sparking between their palms.

“
I want it all, Amana.” He
wrapped his thick fingers around hers. “I don’t want to be a
part-time dad. I want to be able to keep him--”

“
Or her.” She threw
in.

Smiling, he confirmed, “Or her at my
house over night and take them to daycare in the morning. I want to
know the stress of changing stinky diapers and how much formula
costs.”

“
I plan to breastfeed,” she
informed him. Normally, talking about her breasts would have been
something on the TMI side of conversations for her, but since they
were planning on co-parenting, she figured he would need to
know.

He didn’t say anything, just held her
gaze with his own. Slowly, she watched as his eyes lowered past her
chin, drifted below her collar bone and paused at her breasts,
cupped and held high by the bodice of the dress. Heat filled her
body and caused her nipples to tighten and for a moment her skin
tingled as if he’d caressed her.

His hand squeezed around hers. Not to
the point of pain, but firm and possessive. Finally, he relaxed and
his gaze returned to her face. Now, they were intense dark green
eyes staring back at her.

She swallowed.

“
I want to be a part of
everything.”

Now she wasn’t so sure if he was
trying to tell her, he even wanted to watch her breastfeed their
child. That thought caused a tightening in her core, desire pooled
between her legs and her clit throbbed.

Taking a deep breath, she removed her
hand from his. Less contact with the sexy boss was best. Clearing
her throat she said, “Let’s get the baby conceived first.” She
licked her lips, her mouth feeling dry.

“
It’s up to you. When do
you want to do this?”

How his voice could sound so steady
confounded her. “Well, I’m sure your part of it won’t be as
involved as mine. They probably will run a few tests, but when all
is said and done, they will just need you to fill the cup. Since
you want to be a part of it all, do you mind taking fifty percent
of the cost?”

Neal was silent. He sat in his chair
still. If it wasn’t for the occasional blink, she would have
thought he was comatose.

“
N-neal?” Had she said
something wrong? Maybe the mention of money had placed her in the
same category as the other women who wanted financial gain from
him. She hoped not. She had more than enough saved for the cost,
but it would take a large chunk out of her savings and she didn’t
want to have to pay it all if she didn’t have to. Ergo her reason
for wanting the insurance policy amended.

“
I have no intention of
milking myself into a cup while watching porn, Amana.”

What
? Was this whole hour’s conversation for nothing? “Then why
did you say you would do it?”

“
No. I said I would give
you a baby. Help you conceive.”

The skin of her forehead
tightened with her confusion. “Then how do you plan to…” She almost
heard the
bing
as
the light bulb came on over her head. It was becoming
clear.

The arrogant tilt of Neal’s head and
the lifting of a single eyebrow confirmed her thoughts. His words
solidified it. “The old fashioned way.”

“
You want to sleep with
me?”

~YH~

Hell, yes!
His mind screamed. Even if his mind still had a
few doubts about whether this was the right decision, his gut was
very clear on what it wanted. His cock seconded it. The thought of
making love to Amana appealed to him on so many levels, it was hard
for him to list them all. It wasn’t a foreign thought. There had
been several times over the last year that he’d awakened with his
dick hard and aching after lustful dreams of her. Erotic images of
pushing up one of her hip hugging skirts and having her straddle
him in his office chair. There were times he thought about her in
the sexy slacks she wore and sliding them over her full hips and
firm thighs and bending her over his desk and fucking her from
behind.

It was always in his office that he
took her. He just chalked it up to the fact they didn’t really see
each other outside of work, unless she went with him on a business
trip and even then they were spending hours in conference rooms.
But the setting didn’t make the dreams any less carnal.

However, telling Amana that would
freak her out even more, and she already looked as if she wanted to
pick up her dress and run. So, he stayed calm and sensible about
it. “Think about it like this: two people having sex has long been
the most beneficial way of conceiving for eons. And it creates a
better memory than you having your feet pointed to the ceiling
while some doctor shoves a syringe in you.”

“
There are reasons you
don’t write marketing ads,” she told him. “A lot of women get
pregnant from in vitro.”

“
Yes, and end up with
twins, triplets, quadruplets--”

She raised her hand halting his count.
“I get it.”

“
They also don’t always get
pregnant the first time.”

“
The same is true about the
traditional method.”

“
But it doesn’t cost you to
try the first time or any additional times.” He winked at her and
enjoyed seeing the color flood her soft golden brown cheeks at his
meaning.

“
I don’t know, Neal. It
seems like we’d be taking such a big risk on so many fronts. We may
not be compatible.”

“
Physically?”

The air around them thickened with the
thought of feeling her sex conform to his penis. His breathing
became slightly laborious.

She rubbed the side of her neck.
“Genetically.”

“
We both know that we are.”
He patted his side where her kidney rested inside of
him.

“
Well, what about work,
family, our friendship...” she sighed. “We could be jeopardizing
all of that.”

He leaned forward, resting his weight
on both his forearms. “As long as you promise to respect me the
morning after we do this, I’m good.”

She pressed her palm against her
forehead. “How can you be so calm, so blasé about this?”

“
Because it’s you, Amana.”
He looked into her face, locking his gaze on her dark brown eyes.
“I may have second and third issues with any other woman. But, with
you
none
.” He
paused, allowing the weight of his words to sink in. “You did a
selfless act for me and didn’t think twice about it. Or if you did,
still went through with it regardless of the risks associated with
it; which is a hell of a lot greater than people gossiping about
us.”

Turning away from him, she stared out
the door towards the guests in the main area of the restaurant.
Then her gaze lowered to her lap for a while. He could see the
various emotions playing across her face and in her posture. She
went from tense to relaxed, to her face contorting, a mirror of her
internal struggles.

The long silence began to
weigh on him and he started to wonder if there was another issue
between them. One that was truly keeping her from agreeing.
Was it possible she is not attracted to me? That
the sexual tension between us over the last two years has only been
one sided?

“
Is it sleeping with me
that’s the problem, Amana?” He waited, dreading her reply. “You’d
perhaps prefer someone else?”

Slowly, she raised her head and he
could see the passion in her gaze, making her eyes appear more
black than brown. Maybe like him, her mind had been playing images
of the two of them making love, their nude bodies fitted perfectly
against each other.

“
No. There’s no one else
I’d trust to do this with me other than you.”

He almost passed out with the force of
the relief that rocked his soul. “That’s good to know.” He gave her
a small smile and she returned it. Holding both his hands out to
her, he said, “We’ll do this as friends.”

“
Friends.” She nodded and
placed her hands in his.

Lifting one hand, he kissed the back
of her fingers and felt her slight tremor before he pulled
away.

“
When do you think we
should do this?”

How could he say tonight would be a
great time to start without sounding like a randy teenage boy? Not
to mention, he’d have a hard time convincing her to have sex if it
wasn’t going to be beneficial to procreation. “I guess it all
depends on when you’re fertile or ovulating, whichever.”