A Scot Like You (The MacLarens of Balmorie, 2) (8 page)

"Thank you," he said.

"Why are you thanking me?"

He shrugged. "Because you gave a damn. Because you tried. It's not a part of me I want anyone to see. I'd rather you hadn't. But I do appreciate you wanting to help."

"Let me guess. If you had it your way, you'd deal with everything all on your own. Not let anyone see your grief."

His jaw went tight and Kate wondered why she had to push it, why she cared in the first place. Why didn't she just say "you're welcome" and get the hell out of there?

"That's the plan," he replied with a slight edge.

"You let Hildie in. You're not totally alone. Maybe it's not such a bad idea to let someone else in, too."

Tension came over his expression. "You offering?"

Kate flinched. She could feel herself go pale. No. Of course not. She wasn't offering. She didn't want to be the one he leaned on, the one he let in. She was just . . . what
was
she doing? Did she want to be the one? As soon as the question presented itself, she knew, deep down, she did. She wanted to be the one to make him grin like the devil, to feel safe and not alone, to hold him, give him strength…

Holy crap.

Her heart pounded. She couldn't breathe. She frowned at him, shaking her head, telling him "no" with her look. A look she was pretty sure bordered on horrified.

She scrambled off the bed as Devin reached for her. "Kate."

She stopped a few feet from the bed. "This was a mistake. I'm sorry. Again. I keep saying that, don't I?" Panic made her voice tremble, made her want to run. "Maybe it's best we don't interact anymore."

Devin rose from the bed with a determined look on his face and started toward her. Kate backed up. He kept coming. Inches from her. They backed up together. Until the wall stopped them. Where was the door? Devin's front pressed against hers, his thighs, hips, groin, and torso pining her to the wall. His hands came up, his fingers diving into her hair as he cupped her face.

He was going to kiss her, and for Kate it felt like if she let him, she'd be branded. The final step to throwing away her heart. Still, her eyelids slid closed and her nerves sparked, making little fires go off under her skin. She was struck by how much she wanted him, struck so hard that in one smooth, panicked move, she dropped through his arms and darted out the bedroom door.

Devin MacLaren could hurt her far worse than Holden ever had.

Breathless, she hurried down the steps and out the door. As soon as she was outside, she broke into a dead run, speeding around the corner of the house and nearly colliding with Lucy.

"Jeez!" she rasped, startled.

Lucy grabbed both of her arms, worry instantly overtaking her features. "Wha—"

"I think I'm in love with Devin," Kate blurted with all the doom and horror she felt.

The back door slammed. Her head whipped around.

"Kate!" Devin's voice rang out.

She turned back to Lucy. "Please get me out of here."

And thank God for cousinly love because that's exactly what Lucy did. She practically shoved her into the passenger seat of Ian's Range Rover and took off as Devin came around the corner in nothing but his briefs. Lucy jammed the gas pedal, tossed a wave out the window, and left him standing in a cloud of dust.

"Holy cow, Kate," Lucy breathed after turning out of Devin's driveway. "Are you freaking kidding me?"

Kate leaned her head back against the seat and started laughing. Lucy reached over and felt her forehead for fever. "I'm not sick. Well," she said, her laughter dying, "maybe I am." She let her head roll to the side and stared at the scenery speeding past.

"Kate," Lucy said at length. "Did you mean it?"

Kate rolled her head the other way to look at her cousin. "Lucy," she said with all sincerity and finality, "he lets his dog sleep on the bed."

A bewildered look flashed across Lucy's face, but then she nodded in solidarity. "Yeah. I had moments like that with Ian. The biggest was when we were fishing. He was joking around and said I'd miss him when I left. And I realized I would, so much that it hurt to think about, you know?"

Kate leveled a glare at her cousin. While she was still trying to come to terms with how she felt, she hadn't thought of the fact that she'd be leaving soon.

"Sorry," Lucy said. "Maybe you don't have to leave. Maybe he feels the same."

Kate let out a sharp laugh. "Yeah. You always were the dreamer, Luc. No. He doesn't feel the same. How could he?"

"How could you?"

"But maybe I don't, you know? Maybe it's not real."

"How so?"

"Do you remember when I was little, I was always bringing hurt animals home? Always rescuing strays, fixing their wounds… Maybe this is the same. Devin . . ." Kate clamped up. She wasn't sure how much to say and she didn't want to betray Devin's confidence.

"I know he has trouble sometimes," Lucy said, parking next to the cottage and then turning to look at Kate. "He lost his best friend, Carter. There was an ambush, I think. Carter was Hildie's handler and she nearly died too. She was shot trying to protect Carter—that's why she retired—and Devin pulled them both to safety, but it was too late. Carter was already gone. Ian has bad memories, too, lost friends... But they're coping. This place, being here on the estate helps. And James, when he gets out, he'll need time to adjust and deal with everything too. Look, Devin might be quiet and reserved, but he's strong. He has to be to get up every day and forge ahead despite what he's seen and been through. Maybe you're not attracted to the wounded parts. Maybe what's got you falling is way, way more than that."

Kate stared out the window. So much for finding an excuse to question her feelings. Lucy was right, of course. She was more attracted to Devin's strength, his character, his quiet way, and love of animals. The way he worked with his hands. The way he looked at her, like he could brand her as his with one glance.

"Sucks when I'm always right, doesn't it?" Lucy said.

Kate rolled her eyes and shared a smile with her cousin. "Still, it doesn't change the fact that I'll leave and it'll be over whether I want it to be or not. Not that
it
has even begun." Kate groaned and put her head in her hands for a second. "I'm doing the same thing I did with Holden. Falling for someone who isn't on the same page as me. God," she shook her head and felt tears thicken her throat. "I'm such an idiot."

Lucy leaned over and grabbed Kate's hand. "No. That would be Riley, groveling after Mark when the jerk doesn't deserve her. Don't tell her I said that."

"Oh, she knows how we feel, trust me."

"Yeah. We did make our feelings clear I guess. Our Riley is nothing if not stubborn," Lucy said on a sigh, then went quiet for a moment. "Kate, you're not an idiot. You have no idea how Dev feels. Didn't he run after you just now? I'm not even going to ask why he was in his undies."

"It's not what you think," she said lamely. Though if she hadn't high-tailed it out of there, it might be exactly what Lucy thought.

"Doesn't matter. I saw the way he looked at you when we all had lunch. Intensity like that doesn't come along every day."

"That's because he saw me naked in the barn—he was probably having flashbacks." Kate shook her head at the ridiculousness of it all. What a way to meet someone. She leaned over and hugged Lucy. "You're nuts, Luc, but I love ya."

"And right. Don't forget right."

Weariness settled over her. She'd had enough emotional ups and downs for one morning, thank you. After saying goodbye and taking a rain check on Lucy's lunch offer, she got out of the car and closed the door. Kate waved and then headed into the cottage, undressed, and climbed beneath the bed covers.

Chapter 9

Dev usually had a good idea about what he wanted in life. He took his time making decisions and hardly ever second-guessed those decisions once made, going after what he wanted with his usual steady mindset. Until now.

Until Kate.

He stood there in his driveway watching the Rover speed away and ran a hand over his face, wondering what the hell had just happened and why he felt like the world had tilted off its axis a little. Everything was off. Unsettled. Unbalanced.

Both Hildie and Terry stared up at him, waiting for some direction, someone to take charge. He snorted. Hard to take charge when it felt like he was losing his mind.

Dev was pretty familiar with rise, shower, eat, work, eat, and sleep. He'd been on that routine for months without much deviation at all. And he liked routine. He liked simple. Not this . . .chaos.

"Stick with what you know, kids," he told the dogs, turning toward the house.

Thirty minutes later he was showered, dressed, and on his way to the main house to eat breakfast in Fran's kitchen. The usual. The way things were
supposed
to be.

"You're later than usual, lad. Feeling all right?" Fran asked from her position at the stove as he came through the door.

"Fine." Dev crossed the stone floor, kissed her cheek, and then grabbed a plate from the shelf. "And you?" He held the plate as Fran loaded it with eggs, bangers, a slice of quiche, and biscuits.

"Brilliant." She smiled at him. "Ellie, Robert and Mary's granddaughter, starts working here today. She's minding things while I go visit my Sara. Just a few hours every week to start."

Dev sat at the table. "Name sounds familiar," he said before shoving a large bite of eggs into his mouth.

Fran poured a cup of coffee and set it in front of him. "Should. Hamish tried like mad to set you two up, remember? I kept telling him she wasn't the right lass."

Dev grunted.

"I fear we'll never find the right lass for our Dev," Ian said as he came through from the dining room. Dev shot him a glare. Ian grinned, ruffled Dev's hair and then leapt back as Dev swatted at him.

"Lads," Fran warned.

After Ian poured a cup of coffee, he leaned against the counter. Dev could feel his brother's eyes on him. No doubt Lucy filled him in on the events of the morning, what she'd seen, and whatever Kate chose to tell her. Bloody perfect. As the older brother Ian was required to get some ribbing in.

"All right, looks like I'm done here," Fran said, taking off her apron and hanging it on the wall. "Ellie will be here any minute."

"Go on," Ian told her, "I'll show her around when she gets here."

Fran paused and eyed the two of them. "You lads behave yourselves."

Dev chuckled at that, making Fran shake her head as she left the kitchen. Then, he counted, wondering how long it would take—

"So what the hell happened this morning?"

One second apparently.

Dev washed his food down with his coffee as Ian sat at the table. "Not what you think, bro."

"Then correct me."

"Rather not."

Ian leaned back and eyed him. When he was younger, Dev always crumbled under that steady blue gaze of his brother's. Since then, he'd learned to wait it out, not rise to the occasion.

"Lucy's a little worried," Ian finally broke.

All he wanted was to eat his breakfast in peace and not think about Miss Chaos herself. Dev polished off the second biscuit. "Nothing to worry about. Things got off to a weird start that's all." And if he hadn't seen Kate naked in the barn, maybe things wouldn't have progressed the way they had. His brain wouldn't have been scrambled from the get go.

Ian wasn't going to let it drop, however. Dev could see it in the thoughtful, intelligent gaze staring back at him.

"Look. First day. She ran into my barn buck ass naked after skinny dipping in the loch. Kind of set us off on the wrong foot."

And he hadn't been the same since.

Ian let out a whistle. "Damn, man." He dragged a hand through his black hair. "That'd make for an awkward beginning."

"Trust me, it was way more than just awkward. Have you seen her?"

"She's a beautiful woman," Ian admitted. "Has had a rough few months."

Finished, Dev stood. "Her business, not mine."

"Didn't seem that way this morning."

Dev rolled his eyes and went to rinse his plate in the sink. Ian's chair scraped over the stone, but Dev didn't look. He was done with the conversation. Ian's hand landed on his shoulder. "She'll be gone soon. Out of your hair. Who knows, maybe she'll find a good guy. Bring him to the wedding in a couple months. Not your business."

"Nope," Dev said as he scrubbed the plate clean.

Ian gave him a slight push. "You're such a liar."

Dev turned to find Ian grinning like a damn fool. "And I'm about to mop the floor with your face."

"Bring it on, little man." Ian darted out the kitchen door, Dev hot on his heels.

After the lads were gone, Fran and Hamish pushed away from their eavesdropping spot along the dining room wall and smiled. "Aye, she's the one," Hamish said with certainty. "That skinny dipping . . . fate I tell ye. Couldn't have done better m'self. Gave those two a head start, I'd say."