A Trip Back to Snowy Pines (Book II in the Christmas Village Trilogy) (4 page)

“Okay, just back the car up and pop the
trunk… I’m filling it up with chocolate.” Chris said as his eyes
danced like Ethan’s did when they decorated the Christmas tree for
the first time every year. Lola laughed… and she was enjoying
seeing Chris so lighthearted and carefree. But everything she saw
was a pale comparison to seeing it with Ethan. Chris didn’t know
what he was missing… but she did.

She turned away to hide her wave of sadness
by looking at a display of chocolate cordials and caught a glimpse
of her reflection in the glass. She still didn’t quite recognize
her stylishly coiffed hair with professional highlights to
accentuate her naturally blonde hue. And then there was her make-up
which didn’t come from the self-serve aisle at the superstore. And
her clothes… the outfit she wore at the moment cost more than her
entire closet in real-life she could be sure.

“Lola?”

Lola turned at the sound of her name. “Lola,
it is you.” Stephanie said, stepping forward to embrace her. “How
are you feeling?”

“Fine. Good as new.”

“I’m glad we ran into you. I wanted to
introduce you to my daughter-in-law. Kellany, this is Lola
McCauley. Lola, Kellany Callahan.”

Lola’s mouth dropped open as she was flooded
with memories of Kellany teaching her to use the flat iron, and
watching an American girl movie with her; the two of them dressing
up in matching boots and going to the carnival and then riding on a
sleigh and cutting down a tree in the woods.

“It’s so nice to meet you Lola. My daughter
is named Lola, but you just don’t hear of that many Lola’s
anymore.” Kellany said, smiling politely, but with a blank
expression.

“Uhhh… it’s nice to meet you too.” Lola said,
feeling her insides churn with disappointment. Kellany was supposed
to be the one with the answers. She was her anchor in this place
where no one else was who or what they were supposed to be.

“This is my husband Chris.”

“Hi Chris. This is my husband Josh.”

Josh took her hand and stared at her for a
moment. “You look so familiar to me. Have we met before?”

“Oh hush. He thinks he knows everyone. He
insisted he’d met me the first time we met too.”

“As I recall you insisted…”

Kellany interrupted whatever he was going to
say and asked, “So now are you the one who loved my cookies?”

“I am.” Lola said her voice thick with
unexpressed emotions.

“Then you have to have one of my gourmet
cocoas. They use my recipe here. Can we bring one back for anyone?”
Kellany asked, pulling her away before anyone really had the chance
to answer.

Once they began walking away Kellany exhaled
deeply, and whispered, “Oh God Lola is it really you?”

“You know me?” Lola said, fighting tears.

“Of course I know you! Look at you! You’re
all grown up and so beautiful. I really never thought I’d see you
again!”

“What is this? Am I dead?”

“No… I don’t think.” Kellany answered
nervously.

“You don’t think?” Lola shrieked.

“Shhh…Well the truth is, I don’t exactly
know. But we can’t talk here. Can you meet me somewhere later?”

“Yes.” Though Lola wasn’t exactly sure how
she’d get away from Chris, but she knew she had to find time to
talk to Kellany alone.

“Are you staying at Mrs. Appleby’s?”

“Yes.”

“Okay, I will swing by this afternoon at 3:00
to take you shopping for the ingredients for my cookies.”

“Okay.” Lola said, sighing with relief. “By
the way. I know how to make your cookies. They’re the only homemade
thing I know how to make, but I make them well. You taught me.”

Kellany smiled and touched her face. “I
remember everything about it.”

***

As it turned out, it was easier to get away
from Chris that afternoon than she’d planned. He still needed to
email some documents for the brief he was supposed to file the day
of her accident, and the Wi-Fi at the B&B was sketchy at best.
He’d been told that the library was his best bet, so he was going
to work for a couple of hours which left her free to meet with
Kellany.

“Is it okay if I hug you?” Kellany said when
they met in front of Mrs. Appleby’s.

Lola laughed and stepped into her
outstretched arms. She felt as if she was coming home.

“Okay, now tell me what you know about this.”
Lola said when they started walking.

“I don’t know anything for sure. But let me
just tell you my story, and we’ll go from there. Sixteen years ago
I was on a trip a few days before Christmas to reconnect with
someone I knew when I was in foster care. This woman had an amazing
Christmas Village that I adored when I was a little girl. Anyway,
along the way I had a wreck and I woke up here – inside that
Christmas village come to life. I knew every building, every lamp
post, even Josh looked like my favorite figurine. I thought I was
losing my mind, but I just kept being here… I met you and Josh and
I fell in love… with both of you. And just when I’d decided I
wanted to stay here I woke up in a hospital bed at Johns Hopkins.
But here’s where it gets interesting. The woman I was going to see
was there at the hospital. They’d called her because her address
was in my GPS. She came to the hospital and tells me that the
Christmas Village was a replica of her home town. Then she calls
her grandson to come and check on me because he’s a doctor there
and he walks in my room and it was Josh. He always said he couldn’t
shake the feeling that he knew me so finally I told him he did know
me. That we met in my dreams. We come home to Snowy Pines every
Christmas and no one remembers me or anything that happened during
those first few weeks. I’m just Josh’s wife from the city. I
honestly thought that they were my dream and you were part of my
dream. So what do you know?”

Lola sighed. “My memories aren’t as clear as
yours… I was a little girl after all. But the best I can piece
together, sixteen years ago my mom and I had a wreck. She went to
rehab and I went in the hospital and took pneumonia. I was here in
this hospital with you and Josh. Most of my memories were hazy till
I got here, but they’re all coming back in startling clarity now.
We had dinner at Appleby’s that you cooked and we went to the
carnival and you gave me clothes. We spent a perfect day together
decorating a tree that we cut down from the woods, and then you
taught me how to bake cookies. And when we went back to the
hospital Josh told me I was going home to my mom. I woke up the
next morning at Johns Hopkins from an extremely high fever and
found out I was going to be spending Christmas in foster care. I
hardly ever even thought about that… I just thought it was a dream.
But I’ve had a tough time lately, and I started thinking about it
the other night when I was driving home from work. I’m a nurse at
UMMC. I got lost, stopped for gas and directions and walked in on a
robbery. I fainted and woke up here… but everything is different!
Were you different when you were here before because I don’t think
I was different?”

“Just my hair.” Kellany answered, clearly
trying to think back.

“Your hair?” Lola asked skeptically.

“Yes. In real life I had short bright red
hair. All my life I’d been coloring my hair ridiculous colors just
so I wouldn’t look like my mom. But when I woke up here it was long
and blonde. Then when I woke up in the hospital it was short and
red again.”

“I have a five year old son and I’m fifteen
weeks pregnant and Chris and I are separated… I woke up here and
we’re childless and all honey-moony and rich because he’s a lawyer.
We live in Inner Harbor! This outfit costs more than my entire
wardrobe. I don’t get it!”

“Okay, slow down. I think we come here
because we need to learn something. When I came here before, I came
to meet you and Josh; to find out that I could fall in love and be
a wife and a mother and all of those things that I thought I
couldn’t do because my mother was such a nightmare. The truth is… I
thought you were my daughter.”

“What?” Lola asked, looking confused.

“When Josh and I got married and I pictured
us with children I always pictured us with you. And then we got
pregnant and I had no doubt she would be a girl, and she’d be Lola
and she’d be you. And she was a girl and she was Lola and she had
long beautiful blonde hair, but somewhere along the way I realized
she wasn’t going to be you. Don’t get me wrong… she’s the love of
my life and the most amazing little girl on the face of the earth,
but she’s her own person. Which means… I didn’t just meet you for
me. I met you for you. So what did you learn from our last
encounter?”

Lola thought about it for a moment and
finally said, “I was safe… I mean my mother wasn’t like yours. I
wouldn’t describe her as a nightmare. I loved her. I still love her
dearly, and I know she’s always got my back. But I was never safe
with her because she makes bad choices… men, drugs, finances. But
with you and Josh I was safe. I learned what I wanted. I learned
about the kind of love and the kind of family I wanted to be a part
of and I was always different after that. I was different than the
other girls in my neighborhood; set apart somehow. And so was
Chris. And that’s the kind of family we have, like yours.”

Kellany smiled and nodded, but watched as
Lola’s face dissolved into tears. “So what are you thinking?”

“I know what I’m supposed to learn this time
around. I just don’t want it.” She said, looking down and then
taking a deep breath before launching into her story. “Chris and I
got married young but I was in nursing school and he was in his
last year of college and already accepted to law school. I was
going to go to school part time and work full time and support him
through school. We had plans… but I got pregnant and he postponed
law school so I could work part time instead. I finished school
finally and I’m working full time and Ethan is in school now. So a
few months ago I was doing laundry and I found a letter in Chris’s
pocket where he’d gotten the acceptance back from the dean of
admissions and they were reinstating his application for law school
and prepared for him to start in January.”

“And that’s not a good thing?” Kellany asked,
guiding her to a table at the coffee shop.

“I’d found out that morning that I was
pregnant again. So I told Chris that I was leaving him because he’d
lied to me about law school and I took Ethan and we moved in with
my mom.”

“You’re fifteen weeks pregnant. You can’t
hide that… at all. When I was fifteen weeks with my second one I
was showing by the time the stick turned blue.”

“I’ve been careful. Mama knows. We’re not
talking about it, but she knows.”

“So what do you think is going to
happen?”

“He starts class the fourth of January. On
his own he can afford to work part time and go to school part time.
I’ll keep working full time until maternity leave and stay with
mama and take care of the kids.”

“I don’t see how that helps anything?”
Kellany asked.

“The morning I realized I was pregnant again
I told myself that we’d be fine. That life is what happens while
you’re busy making plans and we’d just work our jobs and raise our
kids and law school was a kid’s dream… just like my dream that I’d
see you again someday. And then I found that letter and I realized
that he still wants that dream. I can’t hold him back again.”

“Lola honey it takes two to make a baby. You
didn’t do this on your own.”

“I know that, but… I’m their mother. I made
the decision long before they were born that I’d never be the kind
of mother that I had; my kids would always come first no matter
what else was going on in my life. I’m in this with them… but Chris
deserves to have his dreams come true.”

“And you think that’s why you’re here. You’re
supposed to learn that you’re supposed to leave your husband?”

“It’s not that simple, Kellany. I was
completely sure of my decision and then I saw Chris a few days ago
and I’m hormonal and there’s a sick little girl at work and I was
wavering… big time. And then I woke up here and he’s living that
dream and he’s so happy and he’s so good at it. This is the life we
were supposed to have. Chris can still have it!”

“No he can’t! He’s a father just as surely as
you’re a mother. He’s not going to be able to just walk away and go
to law school and forget you and your kids. If he can then he’s not
the man you think he is.”

“Kellany, you don’t know the situation. You
don’t even know me! Not really, not in real life.” Lola said,
standing up to go, but Kellany grabbed her hand.

“Please Lola, don’t do this. Just answer me
this one question… if you’re right and this is what you’re supposed
to learn, then why are you still here?”

“What?”

“The night I finally figured it out… figured
out that once upon a time I loved my mother and she loved me and
the night I knew I loved Josh and I loved you… the next day is when
I woke up. So if you’ve got it all figured out, why are you still
here?”