Aboard the Wishing Star (21 page)

It took time to find a new job and it was easier to find one when you already had one.

But she needed to find one. Soon.

Kara couldn't sleep. She paced in the living room, then stopped, stood still and glanced around at the furniture. The masculine brown and tan stripes showed Neil's tastes, not hers. She didn't want to live here anymore. Nothing about living here felt right.

She went to the kitchen, picked up a pad and pencil, and started a list of things she could sell. A list of actions for tomorrow.

First, list the house with a realtor.

Second, create a resume.

Third, list furniture to sell. Most of the furniture could go.

She'd start somewhere new, leave her old life behind, and take only the things that made her happy.

It was time to leave her past in the past. The house, which had once given her a sense of security, now felt restrictive.

Could she stand staying at the job long enough to sell the house? And what then? Though Daryl now made her nervous and she'd rather not spend another moment with him, she still needed a good letter of recommendation. She hadn't worked any place else since she graduated from high school.

She realized she'd been pacing again. Well, she wouldn't get any sleep this wound up. She went into her bedroom and fired up her computer.

Might as well get started.

She began listing furniture she wanted to sell. When Kara finally climbed into bed and set her alarm, it was two a.m. She snuggled down under the covers up to her chin and thought about calling Nate, but it was late to call. Then exhaustion took over and she fell asleep.

*****

The alarm went off too soon.

The beginning strains of a headache pulsed behind her eyes as she got out of bed to turn off the alarm. She'd slept restlessly, having strange dreams.

Tired eyes gazed back at her from her bathroom mirror.
This is going to be a long day.
She missed the warm rays of the Caribbean sun.

The phone rang.
What now?
"Hello?"

"Did you just get up? You don't sound awake. I'll be there in fifteen minutes." That's right. Daryl was giving her a ride to work.

"I'll be ready."

She hung up and rummaged through her closet in a hurry. None of her clothes suited her. She missed the colorful styles of the Caribbean. It was hard to come back to the cold, bare lines of the trees covering the landscape in frozen Ohio. The newscaster last night said an ice storm was probable.

Kara glanced out the bedroom window at the crusty, sparkling snow. She'd move somewhere warm, like Florida. Sighing, she pulled on a slip, hose, and a dark gray skirt, the warmest one she owned. A white blouse and gray sweater completed the outfit.

She looked into the mirror. In her tan and braided hair she didn't look as if she belonged in her old things.

She put on the new yellow banana earrings and yellow scarf. Maybe they were silly but she liked them, and they added color against the gray.

She hurried into the bathroom and washed her face.

A knock came on her front door.
Daryl is here
.

She spit the toothpaste out, anxiety coursing through her as water dripped down her chin.

"Just a minute," Kara called.

She went and opened the door and stood looking at him.

"Kara? I brought you an all grain muffin for breakfast. Since you haven't been to the grocery."

"How did you know I hadn't been?"

He stood close enough she saw a slight tic in the corner of his left eye.

"I guessed."

"You didn't need to bring me breakfast. Really, you shouldn't have."

"Oh, but I wanted to. I know how you like muffins. And we can't have you skipping breakfast."

"Well, thank you."

"Looks like you didn't get much sleep."

"Let's go," she said as she grabbed her coat and shrugged it on.

They walked to the car then she stood shivering under the falling snow as he unlocked and opened the passenger door. Once inside, she noticed a greeting card and a red rose on the dash.

Oh no.

They could never work together as if nothing had changed because it had. She regretted accepting the ride.

Daryl climbed into the driver's seat. "I missed you, Kara. I'm glad you're back."

"Daryl, please start the car, I'm getting cold."

"After you open the card." He kept his voice shaded in neutral tones and his face closed, his expression guarded.

She put on her poker face and opened the envelope then pulled out the card. A couple stood hand in hand on a beach with a red sunset and the sea. She read the front silently.
We'll always have each other.

She opened the card up and read the inside
. I will always be there for you. Daryl.

This was awkward.

Kara forced a strained smile. His steady, watchful eyes made her nervous.

"Thank you," she said, hoping her voice wasn't shaking. "You're a good friend, Daryl." She emphasized the word friend.

"Now I'll start the car." He patted her knee, and she froze. "I know you're cold."

Kara listened as Daryl caught her up to date on things she'd missed at work. Things she no longer cared about. She forced herself to depict an interest and an ease she no longer felt. He went on and on. How had she ever found him interesting?

She nibbled on her muffin and stared out the window as her head, which had started a steady drumbeat, showed signs of growing worse.

"We'll go to dinner after work and then to the grocery."

What? Have I missed something?

She glanced at his assured profile. "Daryl, I don't..."

He cut her off. "Don't tell me it's too soon to date." His expression darkened with an unreadable emotion. "I saw you with Nate." He almost spit the name. "I know you're dating. You've never given me a fair shot." He shook his head. "Not once."

He's twisting things. This was always a work relationship, nothing more.

"You haven't been playing fair." His eyes met hers, and then he smiled. "You can't say no this time. There's no excursion and I've already made the reservations."

The pounding in Kara's head felt as if elephants were running across it.

I can't handle this. I just want to go home and call in sick to work for the next five hundred years. I'd like to tell him I wouldn't have dinner with him if he were the last man on earth. But the job. I need the job.

"Yes, fine," she muttered just so he'd be quiet.

If she could just get to the office and out of this car. She never had to get into this car again. She'd get her own way home.

Tomorrow she'd call in sick. The way her head pounded she must be coming down with something. Her stomach hurt. She looked at the half eaten muffin in her hand and wondered if she was having an allergic reaction. Whatever it was, she stopped eating.

Daryl leaned back in his seat and drove without speaking.

Kara closed her eyes.
Tomorrow I'll have to deal with this. I need to get my car, get rid of this headache, and get some sleep. Then I'll can cope with him.

It was all she could do to keep the muffin down.

She stared out the front window, fingers tensed in her lap, all the way to the office. Daryl turned on the radio and heavy early morning traffic kept his attention.

At the office, Kara had only minutes to settle into her cubicle before coworkers began popping by, giving her no time to settle her thoughts. Everyone wanted to hear about her cruise.

Daryl hovered, watching her. When he didn't hover and she was alone in her cubicle, it still felt like he watched her. Then it hit her.

He's watched me like that for years. Always watching.

Her stomach rolled.

She wanted to scream. Taking charge of her life would take more than new clothes, colorful accessories, and a trip somewhere. She should confront him. She should report him. But he was her boss and her head pounded. She needed to lie down and get rid of this headache.

Kara took the pictures out of her purse to show everyone some of the things they'd done.

"It's good to have Kara back," Daryl said. "Even with those ridiculous looking braids."

Everyone laughed, but after he walked away to take a phone call, several of them told her she looked good.

Kara wanted to be anywhere but here. She thought back to the night she'd danced with Nate and he'd sung the Yellow Bird song. She looked down at her scarf and fingered it, remembering how he'd nicknamed her. Oh, how she missed him right now.

She walked down to the break room and found aspirin. When she got back to her desk Kara called Viv. The receptionist said Viv was out of the office meeting with a client. Kara sighed with frustration then turned back to a week's worth of papers on her desk.

Very few people had come into work today. Many claimed they couldn't get out of their driveways and had taken vacation days. Daryl hovered, leaning over her cubicle

Does he have nothing better to do than to hover like that?

She decided to ignore him. She worked until it nearly lunchtime. Then she flipped through the yellow pages, picked up the phone and dialed. The sooner she got the ball rolling on selling the house, the better.

"Green Pastures Realty, how can I help you?" a woman chirped in a singsong voice.

"Yes, I want to list my house."

"Well, dear, you've come to the right place. Let me just get some information from you."

Kara answered all the woman's questions, aware Daryl could be listening to every word. This needed to get done and she didn't want to wait. The woman would come out Saturday to look at the house and take pictures.

Kara hung up the phone, stood, and walked to the water cooler, past Daryl's office. Daryl smiled at her and she forced a smile in return.

She bent to sip from the water cooler and when she stood up, Daryl stood behind her. He waited for her to finish then smiled and bent to take a drink. He followed her back to her cubicle.

"Making calls on company time? Selling the house?"

"Yes. And I'll work through lunch today." She turned back to her desk; irritated he'd eavesdropped. He knew she didn't goof off on company time. If anything she gave the company too much.

"I'll order lunch in."

She shook her head. "No thank you. I'm not eating. I'm not hungry."

"You're cranky coming back to work after that cruise. Maybe you shouldn't have gone." His hands closed around her shoulders and she froze. "Such tension." He rubbed her shoulders.

She shrugged him off. "Daryl, that's inappropriate."

He bent down and whispered in her ear, "Everyone on this floor has gone to lunch so there's no one to see."

His words sent chills down her spine and his breath on her neck gave her goose bumps that made her skin crawl.

Oh my God.

"It should feel good."

"Well, it didn't."

"You've had that headache all day. Did you take anything for it?"

"Yes."

He turned her chair around and leaned one hand on each side of the chair arms. "You need to relax more, Kara."

She pressed back into the chair, wishing it could swallow her and take her away. She scowled up at him.

"All right, I'll leave you alone for now." He turned and went back to his office.

She still had to confront Daryl about the edible panties, but didn't quite know how.
Be brave, Kara. Remember what Nate taught you. It's never as bad as you think it will be. Tell him. Do it. Get it over with. Since no one else is here, it's as good a time as any.

She inhaled a deep breath and walked to the door of his office. "Daryl, there's something I need to discuss with you."

"Go right ahead." He gave her his entire attention.

She swallowed then forced the words out. "On the ship, someone sent edible panties to my room anonymously."

"Hmm. Imagine that."

She hesitated. "I thought it might have been you."

"Describe the panties. What flavor?"

"Strawberry."

He smiled, and his eyes glowed as if he could picture her in them. "Red is a good color for you."

Kara couldn't breathe. She didn't like the way this conversation had turned. Why had she brought the panties up? She should've ignored it. The way he looked at her with that intense gleam in his eyes made her stomach hurt.

"Did you send them?"

"Me?" He gestured to himself in exaggerated innocence. "That would have been, what was the word you just used? Inappropriate."

He sent them. But he'll never admit it.

"I'll bet it was Nate. Probably thought you'd jump into bed with him." Daryl leaned forward. "Did you?"

It's none of his business.
Angry with him and with herself, she clenched her fists.

"So you thought I sent them." His tone almost purred. One side of his mouth curled slowly. "Did you keep them?"

"No. I gave them away." She turned and went back to her desk.

Kara sat, trying to calm down, not even going through the motions of working.

At five o'clock Daryl entered her cubicle. "I'm taking you to Antonio's."

"No. I'm not hungry." Her stomach growled, betraying her. She stood, heading for the ladies room. "Excuse me."

In the ladies room she leaned on the sink and looked at herself in the mirror.
What are you doing? Just tell him no. Take a taxi home.

She closed her eyes. She had to consider her job, but he frightened her. Her pounding headache hadn't left and probably wouldn't. In fact it had gotten worse.

She'd had her car towed to a tire place but with two tires to fix, her car still wouldn't be ready till tomorrow.

What was the right thing to do?

She'd worked through lunch, wanting to be left alone, but also to stay busy. She couldn't lose it at the office. She'd worked here too long to burn bridges.

If I could just sneak out and get away from here.

The ladies room door opened and one of the secretaries stuck her head in. "You okay? Daryl said you'd been in here a while and asked me to check on you."