Advancing ((Advance Industries #2)) (10 page)

He strokes my face and stares down at me. He looks at me in a way he never has before, almost tenderly and I realise he has feelings... for me? Oh God. Does he? I love him too, love them all I suppose in a way but nowhere near the way I love Kye. How did I not see this? What do I say?

“You can’t stop me, Trask. It’s my choice. Why would you all travel back to help change the outcome when I can do it alone and you guys can stay here and see the change has worked for yourselves. You’re thinking with your heart, we’re not supposed to do that, remember?” I smile gently and kiss his cheek. “I’ll miss you too, you know that right? I’ll miss all of you so much but this was never my time. I shouldn’t be here and I don’t belong... without him.” I drop my head feeling the unshed tears burning in my eyes.

He tips my head up with the crook of his fingers under my chin. “He doesn’t deserve you. Tell me you know that much?”

“No, he doesn’t, not as I am now. We don’t deserve each other. We tried and ... failed. I have to go before he gets here and you have to make your peace with him and convince him my leaving was for the best. Can you do that for me?”

His mouth is on mine in a split second, warm, inviting and mixed with the tears I’ve let fall, salty. He holds me and for a second or two, I respond. I kiss him back knowing I’ll never see him again and this is what he needs to let me go. He tastes of mint but I push him away, blushing. I just kissed my friend, the third guy I’ve ever kissed. Donovan’s face flits in my mind momentarily and I push it away feeling revolted with myself. Trask kisses my forehead bringing me back to the moment we’re sharing. He leaves his warm mouth resting against my head for a moment as it sinks in that he’s really going to let me walk away. I hear him blow out a breath as he pulls back but his hands remain on my face.

“I’m sorry. That was out of order.”

“It’s okay, well, not okay but don’t beat yourself up. It was a goodbye kiss and it won’t happen again, right?”

“Right,” he agrees, he composes himself and his eyes return to their steely determined green.

“You be careful. Don’t do anything stupid and I will see you again. Hide that knife but take it with you. Understand?”

I look at the knife I’m still holding and then at my dress. Where does he expect me to hide it? He sees my dilemma and removes his jacket before placing it over my shoulders. “I wish you’d dressed better for this Faith!” He admonishes.

“Yeah me too!” I agree, now I think about it, summer sandals and a dress are a really stupid idea. I don’t know what I’ll be confronted with. If I have to defend myself, I’d feel much more comfortable in a jumpsuit and boots. His jacket drowns me but I’ve never been fashion conscious. I’m just glad I get to take a reminder of him with me.

“You’ve always been impulsive! Don’t make me regret letting you do this. You watch your back. Be safe!” He commands as he takes the knife from me, stuffing it back in its pouch and then tucks it in the pocket of his jacket that I’ve now slid my arms into.

“I will Trask. I won’t let you down. Any of you!”

He huffs, “That’s not what I meant Girl. If failing the mission means you’ll be safe, then fail. Okay? No heroics Faith! Promise me?”

I’m not sure I can but his eyes are burning into me.

“I mean it Faith; promise me you’ll look after yourself or I won’t let it happen!”

I hug him again. I’m glad I get to say goodbye to him, it’s not how I planned this but being with him before I go is nice. His concern is sweet. I whisper in his ear, “I promise Trask.”

I feel him exhale a deep breath of relief.

There’s a rap on the door and the President walks in with two new goons that have replaced his injured ones. Trask takes my hand and walks me out of the room. He kisses my head before I walk over to the Eleview and I watch him have a heated discussion with the President before the President walks over and joins me. He says his command but I’m too focused on Trask standing alone, his good eye latched on to mine, I can’t look away. I can’t believe he gave in so easily. I’m relieved he did but why? The Eleview starts rising and soon he’s gone from sight. I breathe out a huge breath of relief. I’m nearly there.

We step out and walk down a carpeted corridor, the walls are a burgundy colour and in heavy gilt frames, pictures span the length of one wall. I look at them as we walk past and stop when Johnson Franks smiles out at me from one of them. He’s less obese in this picture, he has more hair but it’s definitely him, I glance at the next picture and it’s Fraser.

“It’s the presidential wall.” The explains, “Every President is added the day of their election.”

I nod as I see his picture next to Fraser’s. We turn and enter a room on the left. It’s dark in here, there are no windows or natural light but what I can see, standing gleaming before me is an Advance tube. I spin to face the President. “A tube? I thought the Comms were used now.”

“They are but only because society got lazy. When these tubes were first introduced they were adored, revered even. But eventually just walking to a tube in order to travel became a chore. People wanted an even quicker way to get around, without having to get off their backsides. So they worked a programme into the Comms with slight changes to enable the installation. Those changes are what I believe caused the insanity and if I’m responsible for sending you back and righting our wrongs then I’m going to do it in the safest way possible.”

“So I can’t just appear anywhere? I’ll have to travel through a tube and end up at Advance Industries?”

“Yes, you will. But you have to realise, the point I’m sending you back to will be unmanned, you’ll be returning to a week after you originally left. The labs had been partly blown up, the AIG had been hit pretty badly. My father needed time to recover from his injuries. The labs have been abandoned. They needed time to regroup and explain the scandal. You’ll have a few days once you arrive to get a feel for how your time has changed. Prepare for the big election and find your sisters. Do you still wish to continue?”

“So I’ll be going back to the mess we made as we left?”

“A week after. Be prepared, though. In that week, a lot of changes were made, put in place. The city will not be the beaten down city it once was. The homeless have a purpose now.”

“Well, that sounds good, why would I need to be prepared against that?”

“It’s better for you to see than for me to explain. Ready?” He asks as we walk over to the tube. Am I ready? I hate these tubes; I hate being enclosed. I step in and the sliding door closes behind me clicking as it locks me in place.

“How do you know all this?” I ask him as panic sets in and doubt starts overtaking. I want to get out. Fear has me in its grip. What if this doesn’t work? If no one uses these tubes now how do I know I won’t end up as ash? I try to calm myself but thinking of worst case scenario comes naturally. My mouth feels dry and I’m breathless.

“My father drilled me relentlessly about what happened back then. One cannot just take over as President. I had to learn all about the history leading up to my leadership. My lessons were long, informative and eye opening.”

The door flies open, banging against the wall behind it. I look over the President’s shoulder and see him.

He’s petrified and I want to run to him, wrap myself around him and promise him he’ll be fine. He looks how I feel. How he made it up here is a mystery I haven’t got time to ponder. He still looks angry but his eyes are focused on the tube so that’s no surprise. He flicks his eyes to me and I see his sorrow. I have to stay strong, though. I have to for him. He might not think he needs this but he does. Me leaving will help him in the long run. I drink in the sight of him and commit it up top knowing I won’t see him again – if this works. I draw on my resolve and it gives me the courage I need. It stamps all over my panic and leaves me feeling bold.

I think back to all the hurt I’ve been through. It’s been a lot; more than any person should have to face but this...this cuts the deepest. Knowing that neither of us wants this but also knowing I have to. My heart is silently screaming in pain; I can literally feel it breaking. Not the kind of breaking people describe over mundane things but actually falling apart, crumbling into minuscule pieces and falling away like dust. It’s taking every ounce of determination; I’m drawing on every scrap of strength I have not to let that show because if I do he’ll stop me. He’ll stop me and his heart will suffer instead.

“Get out!” He demands.

I shake my head.

“Out!” He shouts again but I realise it’s directed at the President. He seems to grow, I mean I know that’s not possible but he seems to tower over the President, looming over him, challenging him to refuse.

The President is still in shock, probably wondering as I was how Kye got past security and even found this room. He walks past Kye and as he does I think I hear him say, “Just in time.” He tips his head at Kye and leaves the room. I suddenly feel very exposed. I’m locked in a tube and have no choice but to listen to Kye. I can’t run, I can’t leave and I can’t stop him from talking about this.

I’m trapped.

Looking at her now prepared to do the worst thing I’ve ever asked and expected of her, I hate myself. This isn’t right! It took me long enough to find her, even longer to hold on to her and I was prepared to let her go... just like that? What the fuck was I thinking? If I’d known she was out there waiting for me, I’d have found her sooner. This is the reality check I needed. Fuck everything else. I’ll survive without grandparents; it won’t be easy but I could do it. I can live in this place; I don’t want to but again I could. The only thing I couldn’t live without is stood in front of me. A vision of beauty preparing to do the thing I expected of her, doing it because I said it needed to happen and only doing it because it’s what she thought I wanted. It’s what I thought I wanted but I was wrong. I just want her... Her and the baby!

I walk closer to the tube and get ready to release her but I can see from her warring blues she’s made her mind up. If I let her out she won’t listen to me and I need her to hear my words. I need to convince her this is wrong, I was wrong. I need to earn her trust again, make her believe in me. I stop before her and touch the transparent pane. I wish it was her I’m touching but this will have to do until I’ve said my piece. This is what I’ve reduced her to. My heart is rattling against my rib cage, I swallow heavily ready to beg, plead and fight. I can’t lose her!

“Kye I can’t do this. Just activate it please,” she begs cutting me to my soul; she’s desperate to get away from me. I’ve never experienced this before. The woman I love is begging me to leave her be. I’ve hurt her this badly that she wants to escape from me?

“Sweetheart...”

“Don’t Kye!”

I stare at her puzzled.

“Don’t do this Kye! Don’t let me off the hook because you’re scared I’m going. Don’t say things you think I want to hear and hope that will change my mind. If I’m forced to listen to you then speak the truth. Get it off your chest before I leave.”

“Faith, I’m so sorry! I... I’ve treated you in a way I’m so ashamed of. I love you baby. I have no excuse for how I’ve been but I can’t lose you.”

“I said the truth, Kye!”

“That was the truth!”

“Parts of it, but you know why you’ve been distant and cold. Get it off your chest. Hit me with it. I won’t fall apart!”

I run my hands through my hair, she’s always pushing me. How do I confront her about lying - it’s no longer important. Yes, I brooded, felt crippled by her deceit but I know her. I know she’d never deliberately hurt me; she didn’t set out to cause me the pain I felt. She was dealing with her own pain and I abandoned her. We let each other be consumed by not being a unit, a unit that together can take on anything.

“I was angry, okay?”

“Tell me why.”

“You know why.”

“You need to say it!” She fixes me with cool blue eyes.

“You lied to me, you hid it from me. Something I should have been included in was held back until it was too late!”

“I did,” she says.

“Why? Just tell me why baby. Was it me? Were you scared to tell me? Were you worried I wouldn’t be good enough?” My voice breaks so I clear my throat and level my eyes at her again.

“It was never you Kye. From the first moment I suspected I was carrying I knew you’d be great. You’d be the best dad in the world. It’s me that would be lacking. I was worried I’d let you down, that I couldn’t do it, would never compare to you. I couldn’t risk being exposed as the failure I am. I kept quiet so I had time to process it and so I could find out for sure before getting your hopes up. I never wanted to hurt you baby.”

“Faith it doesn’t matter anymore, it...”

“It does though. Because I had a dream, we were happy and excited. I knew you wouldn’t let me fail, you’d teach me how to be a great mum.” She whispers, “We were going to be a family. That’s when I woke and realised. I’m bad Kye, good things will never happen for us because I’m bad and bad people don’t deserve happiness. You stay with me and you’ll never be happy. This last week has shown me what I’m capable of doing to you and I can’t risk breaking you again because it breaks me too.”

Her words strike deep, why does she still think this of herself? She’s the best, most deserving person I know but all I can come back with is, “You’ll break me if you leave baby. I can’t be without you.”

Her eyes are clouded with emotion but she stands her ground “You can Kye. You have too.” She’s resolute as she looks behind me and says, “I’m ready now.”

I turn to see the President has crept back in and is holding the tube activation device in his hand. I pound on the tube desperation taking over. “Listen to me Faith, you’re still pregnant.”

Her eyes widen, and then she presses her face to the tube, right against mine so I can see her breath against it. Cold eyed fury looks right at me and hisses, “That’s low Kye. Really fucking low.”

Her venomous response is biting. She stands back and I shout at her, I bang the tube but she’s staring straight ahead, concentrating on ignoring me completely. A tear rolls down her cheek but still she stares ahead. She thinks I made it up to get her to stay. One minute I’m staring at her beautifully stubborn face, her eyes glittering with suppressed tears and the next... an empty tube.

I stare at the tube completely overwhelmed by what just happened. She left me. She’s gone. She’s upset and alone in a world where she was used. Fuck! I pound my fists against the transparent frame. This fucking invention has become the bane of my life, without it though I never would have met her. I hate it but am grateful for it at the same time. What a mind fuck!

“Will you follow?” snaps me out of my trance and I turn slowly to see the President regarding me. In three long strides I’m before him. I pull back my arm; fist bunched and slam it into his face. This is his fault. I thought he was a good guy. I should’ve never believed Fraser’s offspring intended to help, to do good, put things right. He has his own agenda and I fell for it. He sent Faith away from me. Did he want her to be alone, vulnerable? I think back to the day I first met with this President, what did he say? That Fraser was convinced Faith would return?
He said he would be ready and waiting for her return!
Pieces start clicking into place, the giant jigsaw in my head starting to take shape. He wanted her back, he prepped his son to gain our trust and send her back to where Fraser was waiting? How could he be?

The President looks up at me from his flayed position on the floor. He smiles. Actually smiles at me. My neck tingles. What the fuck has Faith travelled back to?

I Comm my team who are downstairs in a standoff with the AIG. Just as I left them before I took a guard and made him show me to this room. Then I thanked him and choked him until he passed out.

“Stay down!” I warn the President.

“I was warned about the violence you and your team are so prone to. If only you thought as quickly as you act,” he says.

I drag him up by his shirt, trying to hold back the rage that’s bubbling. I want to pound him. He’s made me look like a fool, he’s lost me my girl and I’m crapping myself over what she’s facing right now. I’m going after her, that doesn’t even need to be said but I need answers first. Then I can run his face into every wall in this room and enjoy hearing his bones as they crack.

The door flies open and in walk my team. Jonah takes one look at what’s happened, assessing the situation before walking over to me. I drop the President like the sack of shit he is.

“She’s gone?” I hear from behind and it’s Trask. I have yet to deal with the traitorous sonofabitch.

“Why didn’t you stop her?” I round on him. “Why didn’t you buy me more time?”

“I did what was right for her, not for you. Someone needed to be thinking about what she needs instead of themselves!” he throws back.

I take a step towards him. “You want her? You want
my
girl? Did you convince her it was right to leave me?” With every question I ask my anger overtakes. I can’t believe this audacity. There are codes you don’t break as a team, a friend and just a decent fucking person and going after someone else’s woman is top of that list. “Did it make you believe you had a chance? Did you make a move?”

“Use your fucking head Kye. What I said in the Comm was to get you to move, I didn’t need to tell you did I? I might adore her but I know who she wants and regardless of how you’ve treated her I wouldn’t do that to you. I respected you once but you’re losing it and I’m not the only one who agrees!”

I look at the rest of the team. We’re not looking much like a team right now. We were tight but I’ve lost their respect? How can I lead a group of men if they don’t respect my orders? If they don’t respect me as a person? This is the least of my worries for the time being. I can live without my team too. I can live without everything except her.

“You don’t respect me? That’s fine. I couldn’t care less right now. We’ve been tricked, used by him.” I point to the President still sat on the floor. “She’s gone back and I have to follow so Jonah you’re in charge again. There you go guys - someone you respect. The thing is whatever you feel about me I thought you all respected her, guess I was wrong.”

I walk to the tube, open it and get in. Before the door closes Callan is in my face. “We respect you both. We love you both. You’re in automatic mode and that’s how fuck ups happen. Think about it Kye, you have no plan, no back up. The team is disconnected, that’s no way to steam off on a mission. I know you want to get to her, we do too. But jumping in feet first is a bad idea. You need to think. Be smart!”

“Be smart?”

“Yeah, let’s fix this rift then figure out how to screw them up the arse! All of us not just you?”

Cal the baby of the group, our team joker is so worried by what’s happening that he’s offering me an olive branch and begging me to take it. I take a huge calming breath and offer one back.

“You want to screw me up my arse?”

He doesn’t miss a beat. “What the fuck man? Your arse is nice and all but too hairy for my preferences.”

“Preferences? I thought anything with a pulse would do?” Arlen joins in.

“Any
female
with a pulse Arl! Men don’t float my boat. I probably coulda swung both ways but you guys have scarred me for life!”

“Whatever Cal, I’ve seen you looking at my junk when I take a piss!” Saunders says.

“Just trying to find your junk baby. I look coz I’m convinced you’re a woman!”

“Hey, it’s not the size that matters but what you do with it. I’m a grower not a shower!” Saunders winks and licks his lips in what I’m guessing is meant to be a sultry pose.

This makes everyone crack up; a ghost of a smile even passes my lips. This is what I love, when my team are light-hearted, taking the piss and the camaraderie is high. It might not be the right time but it has overshadowed the cloak of despair I was feeling. It’s made the room lighter. Cal has his uses and that’s why we keep him around, annoying younger brother to us all that he is. He diffused this situation nicely.

I step out of the tube smiling at him and he claps his hands. Mimicking a child, he turns to the rest of the team and chants, “Daddy’s back, Daddy’s back!” with a triumphant grin plastered on his baby face.

I smack him over the back of his head. Enough with the Daddy reference already. I’m only a few years older than him. That chant has me snapping back to Faith though. I’m going to be a daddy, she has no idea, she thinks I was desperate enough to lie to her about being pregnant. She’s at Advance Industries in the past, they could do anything to her, test her again. Try extraction? Lock her away until the baby’s born then test on the baby? I shudder at that last thought. Jesus I have a sick mind. The fact is she’s pregnant and won’t be taking care of her body. What if she has to fight? What if she takes a blow to the stomach? There are too many what ifs, I could reel them off all day long.

“Okay guys that did the trick. I’ve been a dickhead I know. What most of you don’t know is that Faith is still pregnant!”

Gasps of shock, furrowed brows and narrowed eyes all come my way.

“Well, that explains it then,” Walker mumbles.

“Explains what?” I ask him.

“Why you’ve been acting like a lunatic, an escapee from the house of loonyville.”

“It’s old age I tell you. Maybe you’ll fall in love and it’ll happen to you one day as well and you won’t be able to deal with shit as well as you used too.”

“She’s pregnant? Why would she leave then? It doesn’t make any sense. That’s not like Faith!” Trask says.

“She doesn’t know. I only found out a couple of hours ago. It’s a long story but she is pregnant, she’s unaware of it and putting herself in danger as usual.”

“Shit!” Trask shouts and slams his fist on a desk. He fixes a steely eye on me.

“Don’t look at me like that,” I warn him. He let her get this far, he could have stopped her, held her back until I got here but he never. The others look between us both waiting for a blow up so I direct my attention back to them and away from Trask. “Come on guys you know what she’s like, she can’t be controlled or dictated to, reverse psychology doesn’t work on her. She’s a force to be reckoned with and probably why I’m going grey.”