Again (18 page)

Oh, how he frustrated her, she remembered.
 

“I could just walk away.
 
I don’t have to put up with him,” she mumbled to herself as she turned away.
  
But she knew she wouldn’t leave him any more than he would break up with her.
 
Whatever their differences, there was something that kept them together.
 
Rather than let him see how upset she was, she walked toward a volleyball game farther down the beach and sat down to watch.

From the back row on the other side of the net, one of the players made his way towards her, signaling to the others to keep playing.

“You okay?”
 
He kneeled in front of her, hands on his hips, and waited for her answer.
 

One look at him and she was speechless.
 
His sun-bleached brown hair barely brushed his wide, muscular shoulders.
 
Her eyes drifted down his bare chest and rippled stomach and stopped where his bathing suit laced.
 
She quickly looked up.
 
If he noticed her suddenly flushed cheeks, he graciously pretended not to.
 
Instead, he looked in the direction of Bryce.
 
A flicker of irritation reflected in his face for an instant.
 
He looked back at Eryn and asked, “Are you going out with that guy?”

Bryce, she saw, was still ignoring her.
 
She stared down at the sand slipping through her fingers. “Yeah, sort of.
 
I guess.”
 
She wondered if she sounded as pathetic as she felt and she looked back up to see his reaction.
 

He just nodded.
 
And he looked at her, seeing past the frown on her face and her lips that were pressed together in a tight line.
 
He seemed to see deeper than that.

She took in a breath as he gazed at her so intently, for in those aware, perceptive eyes, fringed with the thickest lashes she had ever seen, she could see everything she was reflected back at her.
 
It unnerved her, but at the same time, she knew she was safe.

The silence between them was unhurried and comfortable.
 
For reasons she couldn’t explain to herself, she felt totally at ease with him.
 
It was as if every unasked question she ever had was answered.
 
She thought that if she just reached out and wrapped her arms around his neck and buried her face against his chest, he could make it all better.

She pressed her lips together harder to suppress the sudden urge to ask him out.
 
It would be so easy.
 
Make a clean break.
 
It wasn’t like she was married to Bryce or anything like that.
 
Hell, they weren’t even engaged.
 
She could do it.
 
She should do it.
 
Her mouth opened to ask him, but she snapped it shut.
 
As much as she wanted to, she couldn’t bring herself to ask.
 
She just wasn’t ready to give up on Bryce yet.

She could tell he wanted to say something, but he apparently thought better of it and just smiled - a warm, understanding smile.
 
He accepted her silence without question.
 
With one last look at Bryce, he nodded and said, “Okay.
 
I’m going to get back to the game.”
 

A chill ran the length of Eryn’s spine as she thought back to that day.
 
His eyes still haunted her.
 
She has never been able to shake the feeling that when he looked at her, he was trying to tell her something, but she had twisted herself into too big of an emotional knot to understand it, though.
 
She wondered what would have happened if…she stopped herself from going any further.
 
What if’s didn’t do anybody any good.

She let a big breath.
 
“Okay, so now what?” she said aloud.
 
She needed to know more about who she was, who she had been.

Eryn only remembered that there had been a time when she wore dresses of velvet, rode a horse across the empty hills, and stole kisses on the beaches with a man who made her feel loved and protected.
 

God, he must’ve been something incredible.
 
She started to believe she actually
felt
something for him. “This is nuts,” she whispered.
 
Already she was feeling an ache of loneliness for him.

It would be easier to let this reincarnation stuff go, to forget what had happened, but she knew it was too late.
 
She was in too deep.
 

≈

By the time Eryn got home, a roaring curiosity had taken over.
 
She sank into her office chair, excited all over again about the possibilities.
 

The plain brown envelope from her brother still lay on top of her in-box.
 
She leaned forward and took the envelope in her hands, turning it over a few times as if making sure there wasn’t some clue on it somewhere that she missed.
 
The necklace, still wrapped in paper, slid out of the envelope onto the desk.
 
The cord felt light as she wrapped it around her fingers, the stone heavy upon her palm.
 
“Cornwall.”
 
She flipped the stone back and forth.
 
Why
did
he send it?

She sat down at her desk and wiggled the mouse to bring her monitor to life.
 
Ashley Miller still waited for her.

“Sorry Ashley.
 
Something came up.”
 
Getting to the search engine, she typed in Cornwall 1501. 
 
Nothing.
 
She wasn’t really sure what she was searching for.
 
“Castles Cornwall,” she whispered to herself, typing the words.
 
She clicked on a few entries, studying the images of castle ruins.
 
They were so majestic.
 
Even with their now-crumbled walls, she could see that power they had once held.
 
Picture after picture clicked by and with one, the familiarity grew along with the chills that made her shiver.

She searched for something that would tie it all together.
 
The man had been dressed in pirate clothing.
 
Maybe he was a sailor?
 
Rowboat, fires on beaches, velvet dresses, horses, rolling hills.
 
She stared out the window.
 
What exactly was she doing?
 
Her fingers tapped impatiently on the keyboard and she straightened up.
 

“Let’s try reincarnation again,” she said aloud as she typed out the word.
 
She scanned the multitude of entries, focusing on bits and pieces of information.
 
The rebirth of the soul…physical being…expanding self…lessons learned for soul advancement.
 
Rubbing her eyes, she followed link after link.
 
Souls travel in groups…serving different roles in each physical life…help one another to learn…soul splitting...one half stays in non-physical plane while other half assumes physical form…twin flames...guides…debts to be paid.

She hadn’t realized how much time had passed until she heard the garage door slide up.
 
She quickly shut down her computer and rubbed her face, eyes tired from the glare of the screen.

Walking to the kitchen, she grabbed a bottle of wine from the bar on the way, still mulling over the information she read.
 
Souls travel in groups.
 
We are attracted to those that we recognize.
 
Lessons learned.
 
Past events still influence current relationships.
 
She felt like she must have missed something.
 
If events in the past carried over to this life, wouldn’t she still have the man she once so loved?
 
What else happened?
 
And who exactly was in her soul group?

“Are you going to open that or were you waiting for me to do it?”
 
Bryce looked tired, standing with his hands in his pockets.

“Um…” She looked down at the wine bottle, corkscrew tip already buried into the cork.
 
“Oh.
 
Yeah.”
 
She quickly finished opening the bottle and poured the Merlot into two glasses.

“Carl
Michaelson
dropped by the office today,” Bryce said.

“Oh yeah?”
 
She held out his glass.

He hesitated a moment before he crossed the kitchen.
 

Eryn watched as he lifted the glass to his lips and drank deeply, then added, “He said Troy has a long list of pictures he wants you to take.”

Eryn’s back stiffened.

“He found it amusing that Troy will have you busy for the next 12 months.”
 
He finished his wine and set the glass down.
 
“I’m going to bed.”

They locked eyes for a brief moment before he turned away.
 
He showed no emotion.
 
Only the sharp edge to his voice let Eryn know his patience was wearing thin.

≈

The light from the window was too bright.
 
Scrunching her eyes closed, Eryn pulled her pillow over her head to shut out it out and to try to reel her dream back in.
 
Fragments lingered, flitting in and out of her memory.
 
She wasn’t ready to let it go.

“Hello?”

The room was completely empty with nothing to mar the walls.
 
She kneeled on the floor and clutched the receiver, her knuckles as white as the walls that boxed her in.
 
She wanted to crawl inside the black plastic that she pressed hard against her ear, just to get closer to the voice it held.

“Hello.”
 
One word, spoken so softly, wrapped seductively around her.
 
It swirled like a mist, moving silently across her face, drifting like fingers through her hair.

She sighed.
 
“I’ve waited so long for you to call.”

The receiver lost its shape and became translucent, before dissolving in her fist.
 
Frantically, she searched the room, palming the floor around her, looking for the one thing that connected her to him.

“Look behind you, love.
 
I’ve always been here.”

Scrambling to her feet, she spun around towards the voice.

The space between them closed with a few gliding steps.
 
Willing arms wrapped around each other, giving them what they needed – comfort, rest, and a place to come home.
 
Heated love reached out, capturing her breath.

“I’ve missed you.”
 
His lips brushed her hair and her temples before he held his cheek to hers.

She clung to him, not understanding the sadness in his voice.
 
His arms tightened around her.
 
And then he was fading.

 
An echo of his voice haunted her.
 
“Please do not turn me away.”

The dream was getting harder to hold on, slipping away like mercury on glass.
 
It was no use.
 
The harder she tried, the more it eluded her.
 
With a groan she slammed her fists into the bed.

“You’re awake.”

She sat straight up, the pillow landing in her lap.
 
Bryce stood at the bathroom doorway rubbing his hair with a towel, another one tucked around his waist.
 
She shivered, but it wasn’t at the sight of his taut stomach or the way his broad chest and strong shoulders seemed to fill the room.
 
It was the way he was looking at her, a potent mix of strength, power, broodiness, and control.
 
He walked to her, his eyes smoldering with possessiveness, each step purposeful.

His eyes held hers for a moment before he reached for the pillow and put it beside her.
 
Towering over her, he leaned in and pressed his lips against hers, his breathing quick and hoarse.
 
The towel came open as he slid under the sheets with her, leaning her back, trapping her with his body.
 
He pulled back just long enough to smooth his thumb across her lower lip, then quickly covered her mouth with his, sweeping his tongue inside.
 
The invasion should have been sweet, but instead he fought with her, leading her with hungry urgency.