All She Wanted (2) (21 page)

Briggs

My mental countdown was in full swing
before my eyes had even cracked open, but luckily, the day proved busy. I had
never been more grateful for
busy
.

There was not a surface that wasn’t
scrubbed, shined or polished—even the gym had been thoroughly cleaned by late
afternoon on Monday. Though I had my own motivations for Chief’s homecoming, we
were all looking forward to his arrival at the station. He had been at this
station for over twenty years, and acting as chief for twelve of that. Sure he
was twice my age, but there was nothing
old
about the man. On several occasions he had proved his endurance was greater
than any of the “young pups” he had hired. Nearly two years ago he had stood in
a frigid lake with Kai, myself, and five other guys to see who could be the last
one standing. The catch was we were only allowed to stand on one leg, while
holding an America flag.

Chief won.

The rest of us had to do several laps
in our boxers at midnight. Not the best time of my life, but a memorable one
for sure.

The calls today had been non-stop. One
middle school nearby had evacuated at lunch due to a pizza catching on fire in
the school’s old industrial oven. No one had been hurt, but the kitchen had
extensive damage. I had also been called to a scene involving a motorcycle and
telephone pole. I hated those calls. I had owned a motorcycle at one time, but I
sold it within a few months of starting at the station.

Those are images that don’t erase
easily.
 

My phone buzzed.

Miss
Strawberry Shortcake
: Folks just got in. Kinda weird you’re
not here to hang out with us…but I’m sure you’ll get your fill of my dad soon enough
J
.
Hope you’re having a good day, and remember you promised to make those crepes
again sometime for my family. My mom will freak out. Okay…babbling, I know. But
is it really even called babbling if it’s on a text? A question for heaven I suppose…five
points to you though if you know the answer.

Me:
Hmm…I feel honored you think me wise enough to contend with
a question as significant as that one. I think the short answer is no, although
my calculations are rocky at best. Day is simply going…wish I was there to hang
out too, but alas, some of us must work for a living. I bet ten points that you
just rolled your eyes at that? Am I right? Don’t lie. Texting is like being
under oath. Yes, I will make crepes again, but only if you promise to freak out
over them again as well.

Miss
Strawberry Shortcake:
I feel it might be
safer for me to believe it IS babbling, that way I have some sort of mental
filter telling me to stop typing. Otherwise, these already ridiculously long
texts could end up as a novella someday. And fine, I’ll admit--ten points to
you, but don’t gloat. Gloaters are ugly. Lastly, if the term “under oath” is
just a new way for you to play truth or dare…please note I will always choose
dare.

Me
: That, Shortcake, might just be the best information you’ve
ever divulged about yourself.

Miss
Strawberry Shortcake:
Great :-). Folks want to chat.
Ttyl
…

Me
: Count on it.

My day had just improved exponentially.

Charlie

As I sat outside on the patio with my
parents, I felt an odd sense of relief. We hadn’t parted ways on the best of
terms, but that seemed a lifetime ago now. My dad’s rough tan hand laid over
mine as he smiled at me. I smiled back, genuinely.

“It’s good to see you, sugar.”

“It’s good to see you too, Dad,” I said
before turning to look at my mother, “Mom, I’ve never seen you so tan before.
You look beautiful.”

My mom laughed softly, and shook her
head at me. “Thank you.” She studied me for a second, “You look different too,
Charlie—you look…
happy
.”

Her eyes glossed over with tears and
she pursed her lips together.

“I feel happy, Mom.” And it was the
truth. I hadn’t felt this happy in a very long time.

“So the month has been good to you?” my
father asked.

“Yes...the month was very good to me.”

And so
was a certain hottie who lived above the garage.

We talked for hours, eating the ready-bake
lasagna I had made for us. I looked at their pictures and heard some wonderful
stories about their time in the Greek isles. Every once in awhile my mind would
wander back to Briggs, but I tried to keep my focus on them. We had spent too
much time
not
being a family over the
last year, and I was ready for that to change.

They went to bed fairly early as their
internal time clock was off, but I didn’t mind. I texted with Briggs well into
the night, my phone still in hand when my body finally surrendered itself to
sleep.

Briggs

Chief had been in his office returning
phone calls and emails for three hours and forty-seven minutes. Not that I was
keeping track or anything.

Though guys had been popping in and out
of there all morning, I waited for my turn—for the right moment.

When the door to his office opened
around noon, I thought I was hearing things when my name reverberated off of
the cement walls. Kai confirmed it wasn’t my imagination though when he shot me
a look that said
now’s your time buddy.
I stood.

“Briggs? A word in my office, please,”
Chief said as I made my way to him.

My nerves were wreaking havoc on my
insides.

“Have a seat,” Chief said, sitting
across from me at his desk. A large smile played on his face. I couldn’t help but
reciprocate it, even though I had no idea of his reason for it. I hadn’t even told
him I wanted to speak with him yet.

“Julie and I want to thank you Briggs,
for staying at the house. We feel very grateful to you for paying us that
favor. We wanted to give you this,” Chief said, pushing a sealed envelope
toward me. I looked at it and swallowed, my mind racing with ways to break into
this conversation as smoothly as possible. “I also wanted to thank you for whatever
you did to help Charlie.”

At this I startled a bit.
Was it really going to be this easy?

“Help her, sir?”

“Yes, she seems…very happy. We haven’t
seen her like that in quite a while. She said you’ve become good friends.”

He smiled at me again. His words seemed
genuine—honest.
Friendship
was what
he thought had taken place over the last month, and to a large extent that was
true, but there was definitely more to it than that. I took a deep breath,
realizing that this was the moment to elaborate on what exactly that
more
was.

“She’s become a good friend to me as
well, Chief. I should be the one thanking you for the opportunity to get to
know her. This last month has been one of the best months of my life,” I said
carefully. I pushed the envelope back toward him slowly.

Surprise filled his face as he stared
at me.

I continued, “Sir, at first I thought I
would simply act as a security guard around your house, but that’s not how
things progressed. We did become friends, but my feelings for her are much stronger
than that now.”

He leaned his elbows on the desk in
front of him, supporting his weight. Clearly, he had not been anticipating this
statement. He opened his mouth twice before any words came out.

“And what
are
your feelings for my daughter?”

“I’m in love with her, sir.”

There might have been a nervous
undertone to my previous statements, but not to this one.

This
I knew.

Loving Charlie was like blood to my
body, oxygen to my lungs. There was no doubt in this truth I claimed.

The Chief’s eyes never left mine—nor
did they blink. Only the sound of our breathing filled the office for what felt
like an immeasurable amount of time. Finally, he broke the silence and stood, facing
me.

“Charlie is a very unique woman,
Briggs, but there is a history to her that you couldn’t possibly-”

 
“She told me about the adoption, sir—and about
her mama,” I interrupted.

His eyebrows shot up, as if he was more
shocked by that fact than my declaration of love for his daughter a minute prior.

“She…she told you?”

“Yes, we’ve talked quite a bit during
these last four weeks,” I replied.

He turned then toward the window and
stared out. I remained seated.

“What is it you want, Briggs?” His voice
was low, but stern.

“I want your blessing to date her. My
intentions are honorable, sir, I can assure you. I have never felt this way for
anyone…and I can promise you that I would cut off my own arm before I would
hurt her in any way.”

He seemed to consider my words before crossing
his arms over his chest. He kept his eyes focused on something in the distance.

“Twenty-eight pounds.”

“Excuse me, sir?” I asked, feeling like
I must have heard him wrong.

“Charlie was twenty-eight pounds when
she came to live with us—she was five.” Emotion had crept into his tone,
growing the knot at the base of my stomach. Charlie’s neglect as a child made
me physically ill to think about.

“When they went through the apartment
she lived in…do you know what they found?”

I shook my head once.

“A half empty jar of peanut butter, a
bread bag and an old box of stale Cheese-Its which mice had ravaged through. We’ve
concluded that her grandfather was the one to drop off the food to her every
other week or so, but she was severely malnourished and looked like she hadn’t
been bathed in a very long time, if ever. No one had cared for her, Briggs—no
one before Julie and I. We were her emergency foster care placement. And even
once she was safe in our house, she spent nearly two years sleeping under her
bed. She didn’t trust anyone, she had no reason to.” He turned to me, a small
lift at one side of his mouth, “I know this may be hard to believe, but she was
a very quiet, withdrawn child. It took many hours of therapy before we realized
that she was trapped inside a prison of guilt—believing that her mama’s suicide
was somehow her fault. ”

I clenched my jaw over and over trying
to rid my mind of the image of my beautiful Charlie as a broken, hurting child.
I reminded myself that no one would ever hurt her in that way again. She was
safe now; she was loved. Those reminders eased the pain in my chest
momentarily.

I also knew that her adverse reaction
to peanut butter wasn’t an allergy.

Chief turned to me again, a new resolve
filling his face.

“I cannot give you my blessing, Briggs.”

The blood drained from my head, causing
me to feel instantly disoriented as I struggled to comprehend his words.
No…no, this isn’t right!

“Sir, I know that I could never meet
your standards for Charlie, I don’t even pretend to meet my own standards for
Charlie, but you must believe there is
nothing
I would deny her.” I stood then, facing him head-on as my chest heaved with
passion, “You were her rescue once—saving her from a fate worse than death. But
she is my rescue
now
—breathing life
into the places of my heart that were long ago dead. She
is
love to me.”

He took a deep breath, staring down at
his hands before making eye contact with me again. “Briggs…you are like a son
to me. I have watched your life over this last year, and I feel nothing but
pride when I look at you—when I think of how you’ve changed. So please, hear me
when I say that this decision is
not
about you. This is about Charlie—what’s best for her, and if you mean it when
you say you love her, then you should want what’s best for her, too.” He
pointed to the chair across from him, “Give me a chance to explain.”

My heart was pounding as I took a seat
for the second time.

“Alex was a wolf in sheep’s clothing. I
knew from the start that he would hurt her, but she wouldn’t listen to me. I had
never felt so helpless as a father—I was literally watching her self-destruct
one day at a time. I wasn’t surprised when he left her, but I was furious when
he almost stole her future away from her, too. She doesn’t have any more
chances, Briggs—if she loses her scholarship, then she loses everything she has
worked so hard for. Music is her future, it’s her dream—I can’t let her give up
on that up now, not when she’s so close…not even for you.” He clasped his hands
together before looking up at me again, “Have you heard her play?”

I nodded, my shoulders stiff with
tension.

“Then you know what kind of talent she
has. Alex almost ended that for her-”

“I. Am. Not. Alex!”

He lifted one palm in the air, as if to
calm me, but I was far from calm.

“I realize that, but you must realize
the distraction you would be to her, Briggs.” He sighed. “What have you told
her—about your feelings?”

I stared down at my fists. “Not much
yet.”

“Briggs…I think it’s probably best that
it stays that way.”

I lifted my head up to meet his eyes
again, “For how long?”

 
He took a deep breath. “Do you know why the
Bible lists patience as the first virtue of love?
Because it
is usually the hardest one for us to endure.
We always want what we want
right
now
…but
now
is
not always what’s best for the other person. Charlie has
three semesters left, can you really tell me that you would ask her to risk her
talent and future elite opportunities because of your feelings? It takes hours
and hours of daily discipline and focused dedication for her to master her
skill. So you tell me, is satisfying your own desire to be with her
now
worth the sacrifice it could cost
her later?”
           

I pushed my body back against the chair,
raking my hands over my face and hair in utter frustration.
He’s right.

I hated how right he was.

“I’m not asking you to stop being her
friend—she obviously values your friendship, Briggs, but encouraging anything
else will compromise her heart…and yours.”

“Mine’s a lost cause already, sir.”

 
“Then
spare Charlie’s.”

I stood again, nodding as I turned to
face the door behind me. A heavy hand fell on my shoulder as I grabbed the
doorknob.
 

“I can’t make you choose to do what’s
right for her, Briggs, but I hope you will.”

A random thought occurred to me then. “I’ve
asked her as my date to the wedding…”

He nodded in what seemed to be
approval. “I don’t want to control her life, Briggs, I only want her to
preserve her future. ”

“Yes, sir.”

I might have nodded before closing the door
behind me, but I couldn’t be sure, all I knew was that in less than a minute I
was in the gym. I pushed every thought away before dressing down into my shorts.

Thinking hurt too much.

I wrapped my knuckles on autopilot as I
stood before the black leather bag. The only cope for this kind of pain was
physical exhaustion, and that was exactly what I intended to get to.