Altered Souls (19 page)

“To be honest, I don’t remember much about it. I think I enjoyed it, but I knew you needed saving and coming here would do that. And the funny part is, I don’t even remember what I thought you needed saving from.” She shook her head, and smiled. “Funny getting old.”

“You’re only in your forties. That’s not old.”

“Regardless, I came here with one intention in mind and that was to keep you safe. And here you are, safe as can be.”

Her joyous melody reached deep into my soul as I wondered if this
was
what was going to happen to me. Coming here thinking I could save the people I loved only to be the one needing saving.

I was in over my head.

Chapter 20

“It’s so wonderful to meet you.” I shook the hand of yet another stranger pronounced to be my new family, as I scanned the room for my father or mother. I hadn’t seen them since I arrived down here, which wasn’t necessarily a bad thing.

Servers wandered through the crowd offering tiny h
ors d
’
oeuvre
s and drinks all of which I let go right by me. The dining room was more like a banquet room and was packed with people. They couldn’t
all
be staying here. Could they? Organ music began filling the room, and everyone quieted. I didn’t even see an organ. Turning my head in the direction of Chopin, I saw the curtains open to reveal an organ player.

This was absolutely surreal. Everyone turned their attention to the front of the room, and I forced myself to do the same even though I was sure it was only to watch my father and mother strut their stuff as they entered.

The organist switched to a dramatic piece, signaling my parents’ arrival like we were at a wedding ceremony or something. Shaking my head in disbelief, one of the followers mistook my intention and whispered to me, “Incredible isn’t it?”

“That’s one word for it,” I whispered.

As the music was softened, everyone began finding a seat around the table that stretched the entire length of the room. In fact, I wasn’t even sure one continuous table could be built that large.

“Triss,” Trevor’s voice called.

Drats!

His hand crawled up my shoulder, and it was everything I could do to not throw it off of me, but instead I spun around and smiled.

“Feeling better?” he asked.

“Immensely.”

“Your father wants you sitting with us at the head of the table.”

No more being snide or ambivalent. From this moment forward I had to put forth my best performance to date. I had to convince
everyone
that I wanted to be here no matter how much that blurred the line between reality and this…

As I followed Trevor, I felt the entire room’s eyes on me. If I actually cared what these people thought, I’d be completely embarrassed by this reverence. Lucky for me, I didn’t care one iota.

“Triss, you look lovely,” my father said. “Doesn’t she look lovely everyone?”

His hand waved toward me and the entire room broke out in compliments and applause. It was hard for me to wrap my head around what my father was getting out of this.

Smiling I nodded to the crowd and took my seat.

“Thank you,” I replied.

Trevor sat next to me, and both my mother and father were at the head of the table. I wished that I was skilled enough to let loose a spell in here. It would be sensational. If only—

“It’s nice to see your spirits have lifted so much,” my father began. “I thought seeing your mother would put things in perspective.”

“It certainly did,” I nodded in agreement.

Someone from behind placed a salad plate in front of me, and I froze. This was going to be my first test.
How could I do this with so many eyes on me?
I picked up my fork and began moving the lettuce around, hoping someone would begin speaking again. Nobody did, but why would they when they’re on the verge of becoming catatonic.

“So what do you have planned for us tomorrow?” I asked my father, who was taken aback by my eagerness to talk.

“Oh, well. I think your mom wanted to show you some of the grounds, the gardens in particular. Isn’t that right, my dear?”

“I thought that would be fun. That way we’ll be out of the way with everything going on tomorrow.”

“What’s everything?” I asked.

My father scowled at my mother who dropped her gaze to the table. She never would have done that. It
killed
me inside and made me so angry I wanted to scream at the top of my lungs, but I couldn’t. I had to maintain control. I felt Trevor’s gaze on me, and I wondered what he was thinking.

“We’ve got some people stopping by who are interested in using our facility,” my father replied.

“Well, that sounds fantastic,” I muttered, waiting to catch my mom’s empty eyes.

The room was full of laughter and discussion when it struck me that my father was attempting to build his own version of a family. He left us, but he created a world where there were people everywhere he went. He created a community where he was a vital part, and where he felt needed. This had been his family for eighteen years. I guess it’s not completely true about not being able to choose your family.

“Would you mind if I went with Triss and her mom tomorrow?” Trevor asked.

“
Evanesco
,”
I whispered, watching a part of my salad disappear.

“That would be a fantastic idea, son,” my father replied.

I glanced at Trevor and grinned.

“That would be nice,” I whispered. “And I’m sorry for earlier.”

He nodded and placed his hand on my knee under the table.

Feeling completely uneasy and frightened, I turned my head to him and flashed a smile.

“Maybe you could come meet us later in the day?” I asked, looking at my father to distract me.

“I’ll see if I can get away, but I doubt I’ll be able to.”

“I understand,” I replied.

“Are you done with your salad, Miss?” The man was behind me again, waiting to trade out my salad plate for the entrée.

Nodding, I watched as my salad plate was taken away. No one seemed to notice that I didn’t actually eat any of it.

Stroganoff was placed in front of me.

“Isn’t that one of your favorites?” My father beamed as if this was a huge accomplishment. I felt my eyes darken, but I blinked it away.

“It is. Thank you.”

Trevor removed his hand from my knee as his dinner was served, and I felt like I could breathe again.

The conversation became lively as my father greeted a nonstop parade of visitors, giving me ample opportunity to practice several more disappearing spells as my plate became emptier without anyone being aware.

“Triss, this is Marco. One of my right hand men,” my father said, surprising me. He’d been pretty much excluding me all night.

“Nice to meet you,” I replied.

“Pleasure is mine.” He bowed his head, and I caught Trevor glowering at the man.

The evening went on for what seemed like hours. The special dinner my father had in my honor was nothing more than serving a meal that I liked. There were no announcements, for which I was grateful, and no mention of me at all on a large scale. The entire event was focused on him, and I knew that’s how it had to be. A true manipulator could never allow a power shift away from them — ever.

“Can I walk you to your room?” Trevor asked.

I shot a glance at my mom who was eagerly awaiting my response.

“Sure. Good night
,
mom.”

I looked around to find my father, but he was busy with one of the many groups waiting to get his attention.

Trevor slid his arm around my shoulder, and we walked down the long arched hallway. With every step away from the crowd, I felt more alone.

“I know you’ve been fighting the spell’s effects, but there’ll come a time when you can’t,” he whispered.

His body hovered over me as did his words. The weight of his arm made me claustrophobic, and all I wanted was to get to my room.

“Would you like to see the library? He’s got an amazing section on herbs and ointments.”

Shaking my head, I turned to look at him.

“I’m so tired. This day hasn’t turned out how I expected, and quite honestly, I’m exhausted.”

“I understand.”

We walked up the stairs to my room and rather than allow me to walk into my bedroom, he stood with his arm still draped over my shoulder.

“Would you allow me one kiss?”

Lowering myself out of his grasp, I turned to him and touched his face.

“I would want it to mean something, Trevor, and I’m not there yet,” I whispered.

The kindness I relayed in my message stole the last amount of energy my body had left to give. I reached for the doorway for support, and Trevor nodded. An all-knowing smile covered his lips as he took my words as a mini-victory for a someday that I knew would never exist.

“Can I ask a question?”

“Anything,” he nodded.

“Do you like me for me or because of who my father is?”

His smile faded and he narrowed his eyes.

“You should ask Logan that,” he snapped and turned down the hall.

“I’m sorry,” I hollered, offering a feeble attempt at an apology.

At last, I could be alone.

Closing the door quickly, I locked it and began stripping out of my clothes. I pulled open the dresser drawer and grabbed the first thing on top. I slipped the oversized satin nightshirt over my head and dove under the covers. This was the safest I’d felt since I arrived. If only I could stay here the entire time.

I knew locking the door did little in a house where my father had a key to every door, but it would hopefully buy me enough time if I heard someone coming.

I closed my eyes and thought of Logan. I missed him so much. His smile and the way he teased me; the loving way he’d touch my chin, and his kind and gentle soul. My mind thought back to the many times tonight where people felt it was their duty to correct my idea of Logan. I knew I wasn’t the one who needed correcting.

“Goodnight,” my mother whispered through the door.

Could I be this lucky?

“Goodnight, mother,” I replied. “I hope you have a wonderful night’s sleep.”

“You too.”

I listened intently as my mother walked back down the hall to her bedroom. I waited and waited until I heard the click of her door.
Success!

Excitement and fear coursed through my veins so much so that I could no longer stay in bed. Throwing the covers off me, I got up and paced the floor. Noticing brightness outside, I went to the window and saw a few people starting a bonfire. I scanned the small group and didn’t see my father included. I grabbed the curtain and slid it closed. I walked over to the mirror and flipped on the vanity light. I looked horrible. My in-between-bangs wouldn’t stay put. I had bags under my eyes, and I was pale. I turned the light off and crawled back into bed.

I couldn’t wait any longer. I needed to know if my mom could ever be my mom again. I wondered what would happen if I tried to do this and she wasn’t asleep?

Closing my eyes, I forced myself to leave the worry behind. Instead, I began thinking of my mother. I could see her smile as we sat together in the floral shop, chatting endlessly, and preparing the following day’s orders. My mind then flashed to Christmas and our traditional walks along the shorefront.

Feeling connected with her spirit, I took a deep breath in. This was it. Soon I’d know…

“
Anima Viator
.
Anima Viator
.”

Looking down at my resting body, I took flight. It wasn’t like with Jenna. I didn’t immediately merge with my mother’s soul. It was quiet. Silence whirled around me and nothing else. The bright colors didn’t flash in front of me. Did this mean my mother was gone? Not understanding how I was hovering over my mother, I began to turn back until I heard her voice, faint as it was. Locking onto it, I allowed myself to merge with her thoughts. There was hope for her. My father hadn’t gotten to her subconscious yet. Not wanting to press my luck, I began disassociating.

Unaware of how long I had been out, I opened my eyes to darkness. I walked over to the window and saw that the bonfire had already died out. I must have been out for quite awhile. My muscles ached and my stomach hurt, but I wasn’t sure if that was because I was hungry or the process I endured.

I could tell Logan the good news
about my mom
. I just wasn’t sure how to tell him about his mother.

I crawled back into bed and pulled the sheets up to my chin.

“V
ocatio ad dilectione mea
,”
I whispered, touching the warmth of my tattoo.

Closing my eyes I waited for his reply, feeling the
wetness
begin to edge my lids. Would this be enough?

“Hey, baby,” his voice echoed through my mind.

“Oh Logan! It works.”

“Are you okay?”
T
he gentleness of his words floated through my body.

“I am.”
I found my physical self, shaking my head no.
“But I miss you.”

“I miss you more than you could know,” he whispered.

Was this communication making things better or worse?