Read An Uplifting Murder Online
Authors: Elaine Viets
Tags: #Fiction, #Mystery & Detective, #Cozy, #Women Sleuths, #Amateur Sleuth, #General
“Let me hold him! Let me, Mom!” Amelia said.
Josie handed her the warm canine bundle and followed Ted into the kitchen. She opened two beers, one for him and one for herself. He was heating the chili on the stove and the foil-wrapped corn bread in the oven.
“What can I get Stuart?” Josie asked.
“He’s had dinner,” Ted said. “Put down a bowl of water, if you want. Think your mom will like him?”
“I sure hope so,” Josie said, though she wasn’t sure at all.
Amelia carried the dog into the warm kitchen. “Stuart Little is so handsome. Look at those bright eyes.”
Josie heard another growl from under the couch, loud enough to reach the kitchen.
“Can we keep him? Can we?” Amelia asked.
“No,” Josie said. “Harry’s top cat in this house, and one pet is all we can handle. You have school and I have a job. We have to persuade your grandmother to adopt him. That will take work. She doesn’t like animals.”
“She likes Harry,” Amelia said.
“Harry doesn’t live with her,” Josie said. “It took weeks for her to warm up to him. We don’t have that time with Stuart Little.”
“What can we do to change her mind?” Amelia asked.
“We’ll have to help Grandma. That means we’ll walk Stuart Little and clean up after him.”
“Yuck-o,” Amelia said.
“Then Stuart has to go to the pound, where he may not get adopted,” Josie said.
“He can’t. He’ll die!” Amelia hugged the small dog closer. “I won’t let anyone hurt you, Stuart. I’ll clean up your mess. I’ll walk you in the cold. I want you that much. Right, Mom?”
“You don’t have to persuade me,” Josie said. “You have to convince your grandmother.”
They were interrupted by more angry growls.
“Harry is not happy with your new love,” Josie said.
“Hey, where is the big guy?” Ted asked. “Harry always comes out to see me.”
“He’s sulking under the couch,” Josie said.
“We’ll see about that.” Ted got down on the living room floor and peeked under the couch. “Harry, what’s wrong, old man?”
A louder growl, as if an angry tiger were wedged under the couch.
“Come out and say hello,” Ted said.
Silence.
Ted reached into his pocket and set a fish-shaped treat inches from the couch. Twitching whiskers and a red rubber nose appeared, followed by a striped face with enormous ears and angry green eyes. Harry slid out far enough to sniff the treat. Josie, Ted, and Amelia waited. No one dared to talk. Even Stuart Little was silent.
Harry gulped the treat and scooted back under the couch as if he were on rollers. Ted put out another treat, this one a full foot from the couch.
“We have to be patient,” Ted whispered. “Cats don’t like change.”
“They don’t like dogs, either,” Amelia said.
“They can learn to get along. We have to introduce Harry to his future friend in the right way.” Ted set a second treat beside the first. Then a third.
The triple temptation was too much. Harry rushed out to gobble the treats. Ted grabbed him. The cat squirmed, furious at being caught. Harry calmed as Ted fed him the three treats, one at a time, while scratching the cat’s short, striped fur. A fourth treat earned a loud purr.
“Let’s put Harry in his safe place now,” Ted said. “That’s your bathroom, right, Amelia?”
“He likes to hide under the claw-foot tub,” Amelia said. “I keep his litter box in my bathroom, too.”
“Is there a soft rug in there?”
“The bath mat,” Amelia said.
“Good. Put down food and water, in case this introduction takes a while. I’ll hold Harry.”
Ted stroked the cat, talking to him and feeding him treats, while Amelia scurried to prepare Harry’s room. Josie sat in a living room chair petting Stuart Little, enjoying the feel of his soft ears. The shih tzu whimpered and licked her arm.
Harry’s enormous ears rotated, catching the sound of his canine rival, but he didn’t growl.
“Room’s ready,” Amelia said.
Ted continued to pet the cat while carrying him to Amelia’s purple bathroom. He gently placed Harry on the rug, left two more treats, and closed the door.
“Now what?” Amelia said.
“Now they’ll get acquainted while we have dinner,” Ted said.
“But the door’s shut,” Amelia said.
“Wait and see. Meanwhile, let’s eat chili.”
The white chili was slightly spicy and rich with chicken. It was meaty enough to erase Josie’s memory of her all-veggie lunch. The three emptied the entire chili pot.
“That was amazing,” Amelia said. “Can I have your recipe?”
“Anytime,” Ted said. “Maybe we can cook something together.”
“I’d like that,” Amelia said. “What do you think of my hair?” She patted her new style and fluttered her eyelashes.
“It’s perfect for special occasions,” Ted said, “like introducing a new dog to your grandmother. But for every day, I like your hair down. Simple and uncomplicated—like me.”
“You’re neither one,” Josie said, and kissed his cheek. She liked the slightly scratchy feel of his freshly shaved beard.
They heard a thud and a yelp. Josie, Ted, and Amelia tiptoed to the hall. Harry was poking his paw out from under the bathroom door. Stuart Little twirled in excited circles, then licked the cat’s striped paw. Harry pulled his paw back, then stuck it out again, while Stuart tried to catch it.
“They’re playing a game,” Ted whispered. “Let’s leave them alone.”
“We’ll have coffee and cookies in the living room,” Josie said.
“I’ll clear the table,” Amelia said.
“We’ll help you,” Ted said.
“No, you and Mom figure out how to get Grandma to adopt Stuart Little. I can clean up on my own.”
“Amelia really wants my mother to keep this dog,” Josie said as she settled next to Ted with her coffee. They heard another thud, this one louder, followed by a sharp bark.
“The animals are getting noisy,” Josie said. “Mom’s going to hear Stuart Little before she meets him.”
“Then it’s time to introduce Harry to Stuart.”
In the hall, they saw Stuart Little dancing in excited circles, yapping at Harry’s outstretched paw. Ted opened the bathroom door. Harry emerged cautiously. The shih tzu sat down in front of the cat. Harry slowly sniffed the dog from ears to paws, then licked his forehead. Stuart Little stayed still as a stuffed animal.
“Harry’s grooming him,” Ted whispered. “That’s good.”
Harry swatted the dog playfully. Stuart Little streaked down the hall toward the kitchen, Harry running after him. When the dog and cat raced out of the kitchen again, Stuart was chasing Harry. Amelia was laughing so hard, she had to sit down.
“They’re like an old Warner Bros. cartoon,” Josie said.
“We’ll let them play,” Ted said. “Once they calm down, we’ll call your mother so she can meet her new dog.”
Josie and Ted settled on the couch in comfortable silence, waiting for the animals to run off their energy. Josie closed her eyes, and leaned back against his outstretched arm. She had to ask him about Cody. It was important.
“Mom! Look!” Amelia said in a stage whisper. Josie snapped her head up and saw her daughter pointing under the coffee table. Harry and Stuart Little were curled up asleep. Harry had his head on Stuart’s shoulder.
“They’re adorable,” Josie whispered back. “Let’s call Grandma. We’ll tell her we have someone for her to meet. Battle stations, Amelia. She may not react well to this surprise.”
“She’ll love Stuart. She has to,” Amelia said. It was a prayer, not a statement.
Jane promised she’d be right down. Amelia paced while she waited. “What’s taking Grandma so long?”
Josie guessed her mother was adding another layer of Aqua Net to her hair, fresh lipstick, and Estée Lauder perfume.
Finally the front door opened. Stuart Little and Harry scrambled to sit up, looking as guilty as caught lovers.
Jane had done everything Josie suspected and more. She wore her new pink pantsuit and a smile for Ted. He was the current front-runner in the son-in-law sweepstakes.
“Well, who do you want me to meet?” Jane asked.
“Uh,” Josie said.
“Don’t keep hiding him. What’s his name?” Jane’s smile was starting to fade. She saw Josie’s guilty look. Jane’s face was a slide show. The smile died in her eyes. Then it turned into a stare, and finally a glare when she saw Stuart Little and Harry under the coffee table.
“What’s that?” Jane said.
The dog whimpered.
Josie’s courage failed. “Dust?”
Jane pointed at Stuart Little. “I’ve never seen a four-legged dust bunny. What is that thing?”
Stuart Little wagged his tail and looked at Jane with melting brown eyes. She was rock hard with anger.
“I said, whose dog is that?” Jane demanded.
“Yours?” Josie asked, and gulped.
Chapter 19
“Oh, no. No dogs,” Jane said. “You know I don’t allow animals in this house.”
“What about Harry?” Amelia asked.
“I let him in against my better judgment,” she said. “That cat can leave anytime.”
Her glare could have lasered the fur off Harry. He crawled under the couch again. Stuart stayed under the coffee table. Josie wished she could join them.
Ted stepped in and tried to help. “Mrs. Marcus, this is Stuart Little. He’s a patient at my clinic. His family abandoned him and he needs a home.” Ted used the same soothing tone he reserved for furious dogs and spitting-mad felines.
“And Josie’s going to adopt him?” Jane was outraged. “This is my house, not the pound, young woman. You can’t take in strays just because your boyfriend is a veterinarian.”
“We were hoping you would take him,” Ted said.
“Why don’t you add him to your own menagerie, Ted?” Jane said.
“My Lab, Festus, plays too hard. He’ll hurt this little guy. Stuart Little is only eleven pounds. He’s a lapdog. A people animal. He needs you to love him.”
Stuart continued thumping his plumed tail like a cheer-leader shaking pom-poms at a losing game.
“And I need him like a hole in the head,” Jane said. “What’s wrong with that dog? Why was he abandoned?”
“His owner couldn’t afford to feed him,” Ted said.
“Hah! Do I look made out of money?” Jane asked.
“No, but you are a generous person,” Ted said. “If you’ll take him, I’ll give you free food and veterinary care for a year. Stuart will give you unconditional love.”
Stuart Little tilted his head and kept wagging his tail.
“Look, Grandma, he’s smiling at you,” Amelia said. “Isn’t he cute?”
“Real cute,” Jane said with a snarl. “Especially when I have to walk him on a cold night.”
“I’ll walk him,” Amelia said.
“And who’s going to clean up the messes in my yard so Mrs. Mueller doesn’t get upset?”
Jane didn’t seem to realize that she’d declared Mrs. Mueller the overseer of her property.