Another Woman's Man (21 page)

“I slept okay. Except . . .” Xavier leaned over the edge of the bed and reached for her, cupping her bottom and grabbing her around the waist, catching her off guard. He dragged her toward him. “I kept having the dirtiest dreams last night.” He gave a wicked smile as he slowly pulled pack a panel of her robe and began to slide his hand up the inside of her legs. At his brazen touch, she could feel a familiar dampness budding between her thighs. “Frankly, I couldn't wait to wake up, climb back on top of you, and—”

“You should probably take your shower first,” she said, tugging out of his grasp and changing the subject to topics that didn't have quite as much of a physical effect on her. “The hot water isn't always the best in my bathroom. The shower can get cold pretty quickly.”

“Then take a shower with me like you did last night. That'll definitely conserve hot water.” He reached for her again and she took another step back.

“I don't . . . I don't think that's a good idea.”

“What's not a good idea?”

“For us to take a shower together.”

“Why not?” He frowned. “What's wrong?”

“Why do you assume something's wrong?” She huffed. “I just . . . I just don't want to take a shower with you. That's all! Don't make a big deal about it.”

“I didn't think I
was
making a big deal about it.”

“Well, you are.”

He eyed her. “Why are you acting like this?”

“I'm not acting like anything!”

He glanced at his clothes, which were neatly folded on her chair, and pointed at them. “Oh, you're not? So why the hell are my clothes sitting over there?
Huh?
Is that what this is all about? You want me to hop in the shower and be on my way? Were you planning to kick me out?”

“I'm not
kicking
you out!” She dropped her brush back to her vanity table top. “I was . . . I was . . .”

“You were what?”

“I was just . . . getting your clothes ready so . . . so they'd be waiting for you when you woke up and wanted to leave.”

He glowered at her.

“Don't look at me like that! The night is over! Look out the window. The sun is up! I just thought—”

“You just thought last night was a one-night stand and I'd leave your apartment and do the walk of shame back to my car. Go ahead. You can say it. It's what you thought, right?”

She hesitated. “Look, we had a nice night together, but you're engaged. You're with Constance. This was just an itch you needed to scratch—that we
both
needed to scratch. It's OK. I know how this works.”

“Really?”
He threw back the bedsheets and climbed to his feet. He slowly walked toward her and stood naked in front of her. “Explain to me how this works, Dawn.”

His handsome face was now clouded over with anger, though she couldn't understand why. She was just trying to give him an easy out, to say that she understood.

“Xavier, I keep telling you that I'm a big girl. I'm not an ingénue at this. You don't have to play games with me.”

“I'm not playing games! Everything I said last night—”

“While we were having sex,” she muttered dryly.

“
Everything
I said last night, I meant! I don't care what I was doing when I said it, even if I was having sex! I care about you, Dawn! I
love
you!”

She stilled, wondering if she had heard him correctly. “You love me?”

“
Yes!
Why the hell else would I be here?”

Damn, her father had been right!

“But what about Constance . . . your engagement?”

He raked his fingers through his hair and sat down on the edge of the bed. He sighed, rested his elbows on his knees and gazed at her bedroom floor. “She and I are going to have a long talk about this when she gets back tomorrow . . . among other things. I'll tell her the truth. There's no way to get around it. The engagement is over. We're over.”

At that moment, Xavier looked like the weight of the world was on his broad shoulders.

He shouldn't have to carry this alone,
she thought.

Dawn hesitated before walking toward him. She sat down on the bed beside him and gently placed her hand on top of his.

“I know this doesn't mean much coming from a girl like me,” she said softly, “but I'm sorry. I didn't mean for this to happen. I swear. I just wanted to get to know my father, not come between you and Constance.”

“Don't apologize. You didn't force me to do this. I'm a grown man. I make my own decisions.”

“But I could see what was happening and I didn't stop it.”

“I didn't stop it either.” He took her hand and raised it to his lips. He kissed her knuckles before linking his fingers through hers. “And if I remember correctly,
I
chased you. It wasn't the other way around. You tried to push me away.”

“I did . . . a couple of times.” She smirked. “But you were so damn persistent.”

“I always have been when I really want something.” He trailed his finger under her chin and gazed into her eyes. She became lost in those gray pools. “Do you wish now that I had stopped when I had the chance?”

“No,” she said, slowly shaking her head, finally admitting the truth aloud.

He leaned forward and kissed her.

Dawn's eyes slowly closed and she kissed him back.
Morning breath be damned!
She didn't care. She was in love with a man and, shockingly, he was in love with her too. The realization still left her stunned.

As they kissed, Dawn felt Xavier fiddling with the belt of her robe, pulling at it insistently like a small child would his mother's skirt. He didn't take his mouth away from her long enough to look down to see what he was doing. She smiled against his lips and untied it for him. He quickly opened her robe and pushed it off her shoulders, letting it fall to the bed. His hands slid from her shoulders to her breasts and one dived even lower, resting in the moist spot between her thighs. Dawn groaned and lay back on the tangled bedsheets, wantonly splaying her legs wide-open and lifting her hips to meet his touch.

She thought she was exhausted from last night and assumed he was too, but they both seemed to have found a new spark of energy. It looked like that last condom would be used after all.

Teasing her with his hands wasn't enough. She soon felt his mouth in the same wet spot. He lashed her with his tongue and Dawn's moaning and groaning only grew louder. Her pelvis bucked even more. She shoved her fingers into his hair, closed her eyes, and shouted out his name when the spasms of her orgasm rocked her. The muscles in her thighs stiffened. Her stomach quivered. Seconds later, she was still catching her breath when she felt him shift and rise from the bed. She opened her eyes and watched, dazed, as he opened the last condom packet that sat on her night table. He sat down on the corner of the bed and she watched as he slowly put it on.

He held out a hand to her. “Come here.”

How could she resist? At this point if he asked her to walk over fiery-hot coals, she probably would have done it. She shakily climbed to her feet, slowly walked naked toward him, and stood in front of him.

He slowly slid his hands along the backs of her legs, up her backside and then her hips. He leaned forward and kissed her stomach, then swirled his tongue in her navel. She whimpered.

“Sit down,” he whispered.

She straddled him and felt his manhood jutting between her thighs. But instead of entering her, he took one of her dark nipples into his mouth and sucked it. His fingers started to play between her legs again.

With all this stimulation, she thought her body would grow numb to his touch. But it was the opposite. Dawn was almost drunk with pleasure. She grabbed his shoulders and arched her back while he sucked. She loved the rough, sandpaper feel of his beard stubble against her soft skin. When he slid his fingers inside her moist folds, she rocked her hips to meet each stroke, coaxing him in.

She looked down into eyes and saw a raw need lingering in those gray irises. He was as turned on as she was. He wanted the foreplay to end. She could tell. It was sweet of him to hold back, but he didn't have to any longer. She was ready.

Dawn drew his hand away, adjusted her hips, and slowly lowered herself on top of him. This time
he
moaned when he slid inside her.

She rocked her hips again and brought her mouth back to his, nibbling at his lips, sweeping her tongue inside his mouth. He ground beneath her and cupped her bottom, drawing her even closer to him, locking their bodies together as they continued their slow, sensual dance. Then, without warning, Xavier picked up the pace of their lovemaking and she braced herself, gripping his back. She lowered her head and rested it in the crook of his shoulder as he plunged deeper and deeper. He panted against her ear and her whimpers only increased.

She was starting to feel the tremors again. She knew them all too well now. They started at her core, then radiated to every part of her body, from her fingertips to her toes. She shouted out once again, digging her nails into his shoulders.

Simultaneously, Dawn felt Xavier do a series of jerks—both inside her and around her. His muscles tightened and so did his grip, to the point that it almost hurt. He clenched his teeth and let out a slow, guttural groan. It sounded like sheer agony but she knew better.

Another spasm shook his whole body and then he loosened his grip. His hands fell away. She watched as he fell back against the mattress with his arms splayed, like a heavyweight after a knockout punch. He took a long, deep, shuddering breath.

She slumped forward and lay on top of him, their bodies now slick with sweat. She rested her head on his chest and listened to the thrum of his heartbeat as it gradually slowed.

Dawn wished they could stay like this, but they couldn't. She had to go back to the hospital to see her father. She wanted to be there if he opened his eyes, to hold his hand when he took his last breath.

Xavier had his own emotional battle to wage. He was going to break off an engagement only two months before his wedding and break Constance's heart in the process.

Dawn closed her eyes as he wrapped his arms around her. They lay still, enjoying the moment for as long as it lasted.

At least they could lean on each other now. There was that one consolation. They wouldn't have to endure this alone.

X
avier wished he could say he was riddled with guilt about what he and Dawn had done last night and this morning. He waited for the feeling to overwhelm him, to sweep over him like a slow tide, but that feeling never came. Instead, what he felt was content. He was in love with a beautiful, intelligent woman, and she was in love with him too. Yes, he would have to pay a steep price for it, but he'd deal with the consequences when they came. For now, his major concern was to be there for Dawn.

He stayed with her at the hospital all day, only leaving her side twice: to get them both some badly needed food, and to stop at his condo to retrieve some clothes and more condoms. The only time he felt an inkling of guilt was when he grabbed that little black box. Here the woman was grieving over her dying father, and Xavier was looking forward to the next time she would give him some. Frankly, he doubted
either
of them would be in any mood to have sex after the day they were about to endure, but he grabbed them anyway to be on the safe side.

With clothes and condoms retrieved, he sped back to the hospital. And for the first time in years, he turned off his cell phone.

Let my calls go to voicemail
, he thought. But he didn't do it before leaving the umpteenth message with Constance and Raquel's cell phones telling them that Herb had taken a turn for the worse.

All day, Xavier and Dawn sat at Herb's bedside undisturbed by the outside world, keeping vigil. If Dawn seemed to pull away from Xavier's touch yesterday, today she sought it. She reached for his hand and held it when they sat alone in the hospital room. When the pain got to be too much and she couldn't take watching her ailing father anymore, she would ask Xavier quietly if he could step out of the room with her. They'd walk down the hospital corridor and she'd fall against his chest and sob, sinking into him. He'd hold her until the tears subsided and she was ready to go back.

Xavier's mother noticed the change between them when she came to the hospital later that day to visit Herb and lend her support. She raised her eyebrows in surprise when she stumbled upon the couple mid-embrace as she stepped out of the elevator. Xavier looked up and Dawn turned just as his mother walked toward them. Dawn hastily pulled away from him, like a burglar caught in the act.

“Hi, M-Miss Hughes! It's . . . it's good to see you again,” she said between sniffs, wiping her eyes.

“It's good to see you too, hon.” His mother reached out to rub Dawn's shoulder. “I wish it was under better circumstances, though. I'm so,
so
sorry to hear about your dad.”

“Thank you,” Dawn whispered. Tears pooled in her eyes again. “I appreciate that.”

His mother didn't hesitate. She instantly stepped forward to hug Dawn.

Xavier saw Dawn tense at first. He knew well now that she had a hard time leaning on or accepting comfort from people who weren't her family, but gradually her shoulders went slack and she hugged his mother back.

Gazing over Dawn's shoulder, Xavier's mother gave him a knowing look, but didn't say anything to him about finding him and Dawn together. Now wasn't the time. She wasn't going to hold her tongue forever, though. When he left the room to get himself and Dawn something to drink, she followed him to the cafeteria and cornered him near one of the vending machines.

“So are you
still
insisting there's nothing going on between you?” his mother asked, crossing her arms over her chest. She fixed him with a stern stare.

He shook his head and looked down at the two water bottles he held in his hands. “No, I'm in love with her.”

His mother gaped. “You're
in love
with her?”

He slowly nodded.

“Oh, honey!” She dropped her hand to her chest. “Xavier,
what
are you going to do? You and Constance are supposed to—”

“I'm breaking off the engagement. I'm gonna tell her tomorrow when she gets back from her vacation.”

His mother took a deep breath. She looked up at a group of nurses who laughed as they passed them on their way to one of the cafeteria tables with plastic food trays in their hands.

“Well, I wish I could lie and say I'm sorry to hear the news, hon, but I'm not. I just wish you had broken it off with Constance
sooner,
before it got this far.”

“Me too,” he said softly.

“Just be as gentle as you can with her. No one deserves this type of disappointment or heartache.”

“I'll try to be as gentle as possible, Mom, but there's no smooth way to do this.”

“I know, hon. I know.”

His mother left soon after that, but Xavier and Dawn stayed at the hospital until visiting hours ended. When it was time to leave, she walked toward the hospital bed and kissed Herb's forehead before whispering a good-bye. Xavier wrapped an arm around Dawn and gently guided her out of the hospital room, though he could feel her dragging her feet, watching as the nurses adjusted the tubing from his IV bags.

“Let them do their work,” he leaned down and whispered into her ear. “He's in good hands.”

She gave one last despondent glance over her shoulder at her father, clenched her jaw, and nodded. She linked an arm around Xavier's waist. “OK. Let's go home.”

They went back to her apartment, and though he thought Dawn wouldn't be interested in making love, she was. But this time, the sex wasn't as sizzling and fast as it had been earlier that morning or the night before. It was slow and deliberate, though just as sensual—maybe even more so. They lay silently in bed together gazing at the ceiling a few hours later. She was lost in thought, and he diligently tried to put off thoughts of what he would have to do tomorrow, but couldn't.

No matter how you slice it, this is not gonna be easy,
he told himself.
This is as dirty as it gets.

He would try to keep his promise to his mother to be as gentle as possible, but it had to be done.

 

Xavier tugged up the zipper of his jeans. His hair was still damp from the shower, and because he had forgotten to pack a razor along with all the other stuff he grabbed from his condo yesterday, his five o'clock shadow was now officially a beard. He pulled his blue cable-knit sweater over his head and shoved his arms through the sleeves just as Dawn roused awake.

She slowly opened her eyes and rolled onto her side, revealing her tantalizing breasts and flat stomach. He didn't really need that distraction right now. She watched him as he dressed.

“Are you leaving already?” she murmured drowsily, wiping her eyelids with the heels of her palms.

“Yeah, Constance and Raquel should be back by now. I was going to head over there.”

“Oh.” Dawn looked stricken by his words. She slowly sat upright and pulled her bed sheets up over her chest. “So you're gonna go through with it, then?”

“I have to. I may be a cheater now, but I refuse to be a liar too. The longer I let her walk around with that engagement ring on her finger, the more I look like a fraud. I'm not doing it anymore.”

Dawn closed her eyes and lowered her head. “I am
so
sorry about this, Xavier.”

“Why do you keep saying that?” He walked toward the bed, cradled her chin, and gently raised it so that her eyes met his. “Are you sorry about the people I'm going to hurt, or sorry that we'll be together?”

“You know I mean the former. I
want
to be with you, more than I can say.” She sighed. “It's just . . . I've been the other woman before, but never in a situation like this.
This
is different.”

He lowered his mouth to hers and kissed her. She kissed him back just as passionately, cupping her hand around the base of his neck, drawing him close. He would need the memory of this kiss to fortify him today. Regretfully, he slowly drew his mouth away from hers.

“If it makes you feel any better, if it wasn't you, it would have been something else,” he said, stepping back from her. “Or if nothing else stopped me from doing it, I could have found myself married to Constance and then woken up one day wondering what the hell I did with my life, wondering why I was in a sham of a marriage.”

She shook her head. “No, it doesn't make me feel any better, but I get what you're saying. I'll head back to the hospital. Just . . . just call me when you can. If my phone isn't on, leave a message.”

Call me when it's done,
the look in her eyes said.

He nodded before taking one last glance at her and walking out of her bedroom.

Less than an hour later, Xavier pulled into the winding driveway at Windhill Downs. He drew to a stop and parked behind a Lincoln Town Car and a transport van. The two drivers were unloading mounds of suitcases and trunks, dragging the luggage and making sweat pour from their foreheads even though it was about fifty degrees outside. They carried the bags up the steps and through the front door, which was standing open.

Xavier pulled his key out of the ignition and took a deep breath.

Let's just do this,
he thought as he opened his car door and climbed out.

When he walked inside the mansion a few seconds later, he found Raquel standing in a sea of suitcases that her maids were either rummaging through or carrying upstairs for her.

“Be careful with that!” she shouted at one of the women. “It has all my shoes!”

“Yes, ma'am,” the young woman said, bowing her dark head apologetically.

Raquel frowned with stern disapproval. When she turned and saw Xavier walking toward her, her face instantly brightened.

“Xavier! What are you doing here? I didn't know you were coming today!” She strode toward him across the travertine tiles and air-kissed both his cheeks. She leaned back and squinted up at his face. “What a scruffy beard! I hope you shave it soon . . . definitely before the wedding.”

He opened his mouth to answer her, but Raquel continued to ramble, cutting him off before he could.

“Eager to see your fiancée, are you? I told Connie not to worry about the little quarrel you two had,” she whispered in his ear. “Distance makes the heart grow fonder, I said. Well, she will be happy to see you too! We had so much fun in St. Thomas and I know she wants to share all the details! I wish you could have come with us! The beaches were absolutely stunning, Xavier, just mesmerizing! We took so many pictures of—”

“Did you get my voicemails?” he asked, cutting her off. “Any of my texts?”

“Your texts?”
She started at him blankly. “Oh! You mean the messages about Herb!” She waved her hands. “Of course we did, darling! We're heading to the hospital as soon as we finish unpacking. I told Connie if we put off unpacking until tomorrow, the house would be in complete chaos. Once that's done, we'll go straight to the hospital.” She patted his shoulder. “Don't worry.”

Herb was on his deathbed, yet Raquel thought unloading two hundred pounds of clothes and tourist keepsakes was more important? Now Xavier knew where Constance got it from.

“Connie's upstairs in her bedroom, by the way,” Raquel said, flicking her fingers toward the stairwell. She glanced at the door where the two burly drivers stood waiting. “If you'll excuse me, Xavier, I have to tip these gentlemen.”

She then sashayed away with her high heels clicking.

Xavier climbed the stairs to the east wing and found Constance's bedroom door halfway open. He pushed it open farther and saw her standing in the center of the spacious, bright bubblegum-pink room, unloading one of her Louis Vuitton suitcases. He gently knocked and she turned toward her doorway. When she saw him, she dropped the shirt she had been holding and ran across the room with arms outstretched.

“Pumpkin!”
She wrapped him in her embrace. “I'm so happy to see you! You didn't tell me you were on your way here!”

“I wasn't sure if you guys had gotten back already.” He sighed. “Look, Constance, we need to talk. I—”

She raised a finger and pressed it to his lips, silencing him and raising his frustration.

“No, I know what you want to talk about. You want to talk about our argument before I left for St. Thomas.” She lowered her finger and nodded. “I've had some time to think about it, and I want you to know that as far as I'm concerned, it didn't happen. I know you've been busy at work. You're probably under a lot of pressure with your job and the wedding preparations. That's probably why you acted that way.” She tilted her head. “But I forgive you, pumpkin.”

Xavier frowned.
She forgives me?
He wasn't aware that he needed to be forgiven, at least not for that.

“Let's just go back to the way things were.” Constance scratched his chin. “Speaking of the way things were . . . Pumpkin, what's with the beard? I hope you're not planning to wear that to the wedding! What about our pictures? You can't . . .”

Her voice drifted off when he tugged her arm from around his neck, her hand from his face, and took a step back from her.

She stared up at him. “What's wrong?”

He stepped around her and walked farther inside her bedroom, wondering where to start.

“Pumpkin, what's wrong?” she asked again. “You're . . . you're starting to scare me.”

“We can't get married,” he blurted out.

There. I said it. I finally said it!

Constance stared at him. “Wha-what?”

“We can't get married, Constance. I have to call it off.”

“Please, tell me you're joking,” she whispered.

He slowly shook his head. “It's not a joke.”

“It
has
to be a joke! This is . . . this is just . . . Is this about our argument? Because I told you that I—”