Arizona Embrace (17 page)

Trinity laughed. “That would be egging you on. It’d be the same as an insult, maybe even a challenge. Then, even if you didn’t want to shoot me, you’d feel honor-bound to do it just to prove you had the courage.”

“Is that really the way men think?” Victoria sounded stunned by what she’d heard.

“Pretty much.”

“I don’t even think Buc is that dumb.”

Trinity felt anger spurt through him. He didn’t mind Victoria’s disagreeing with him. He expected that. It was the way she said “even Buc.”

“Every self-respecting man feels that way, especially here in the West. If you don’t have courage, you might as well go back East.”

“You make it sound like the East is only for cowards and scalawags.”

“I didn’t mean that,” Trinity said, irked she had goaded him into saying something he didn’t mean. “Living in the West requires a certain kind of physical courage from a man, a willingness to put his life on the line to prove himself.”

“And if he fails?”

“At least he knows he died like a man. With respect.”

“And his wife. Does she know it, too?”

“Of course. A real woman wouldn’t want to be married to a coward.”

“Maybe I’d better let you hang me. I certainly don’t belong here.”

“What do you mean by that?”

But Victoria didn’t answer. Trinity tried several times to resume their conversation, but she made no reply to his remarks. He finally gave up and rode in silence.

He tried to concentrate on his plans for getting Victoria away from Mountain Valley Ranch and out of Arizona, but he couldn’t keep from thinking about Victoria’s words. Why should she feel such contempt for a characteristic which was basic to most men no matter where they lived? Other women believed in it. He knew because he’d seem them egg their men on. He’d seen it happen in saloons, at mining claims, even on poor dirt farms. Sometimes he wondered if the women didn’t believe in it more strongly than the men.

That same characteristic in Buc and her uncle had freed her from jail. Or did she think there had been no risk just because it had been successful?

Another thing puzzled him. Why would she fight so hard to get free, then give up? She hadn’t even struggled. Just said she didn’t belong, turned her head to the wall, and refused to speak.

He didn’t understand Victoria, but then he’d never understood women. Well, maybe he understood Queenie now, but he hadn’t then. She’d plucked him like a banjo, and he’d twanged loud and clear.

But he didn’t believe Victoria was like Queenie. Both had killed their husbands, but the similarity stopped there.

It had to.

Victoria was sure she couldn’t remain in the saddle another mile. They had traveled for hours without stopping. Trinity had picked up a packhorse shortly after he recaptured her, and he had kept to the trail without a single break. It made her absolutely livid to know he had planned her abduction down to the last detail and she had fallen right into his trap.

“You can have all the jerky you want,” he said when she complained she was hungry, “but we can’t stop long enough to cook. I want to get as far from Mountain Valley Ranch as I can.”

“It won’t make any difference. My uncle will find you. And when he does, hell kill you.”

“That possibility keeps me moving,” Trinity replied, a mocking smile momentarily vanquishing his stern expression. “I don’t relish the idea of holding off a dozen men and trying to keep my eye on you at the same time.”

“Don’t worry. It won’t be a problem for long.”

“You have a lot of confidence in Buc, don’t you?”

“Why shouldn’t I? He took me out of the Bandera jail without anybody knowing, and he protected me from five other men just like you.”

“But I captured you.”

“Only because we got careless. No,” Victoria corrected herself, compelled to be honest, “
I
got careless. Even worse, I ignored Buc’s warnings.”

“If it makes you feel any better, I’ve never failed to bring in a man I went after.”

“It doesn’t,” Victoria snapped, convinced Trinity possessed a sadistic streak. “But it does make me happy to know you’ll go back empty-handed.”

“I’m taking you back even if we have to travel all the way to Texas without stopping,” Trinity declared.

“The sun went down an hour ago,” Victoria said, changing the subject. “Can’t we stop now?”

“We’ve only got a few more miles to go.”

“It’s so dark I can’t see where I’m going. We could fall off this mountainside.”

“I can see.”

“Now you want me to believe you can see in the dark. What other superhuman talents do you possess? No, don’t tell me. A catalog of your many skills would surely extinguish all hope of escape. And the way my bottom hurts now, I live for the hope of returning the pain full measure.”

“I’ll trade my scratches for your sore behind.”

“I didn’t think Western men felt pain. I thought you took bullets, fists, kicks, anything than or beast could throw at you without flinching.”

“I don’t know about Buc, but I flinch. And these scratches hurt like the devil.”

“You’ll soon have more to add to those.”

“The next attempt to scratch or kick me might well earn you a good paddling.”

“You wouldn’t dare. No man would strike a lady.”

“You women are fond of using that, aren’t you?”

“Using what?”

“A double standard. You think you can kick and scratch and cuss, do just about anything you want, and men will go on treating you like something sacred. And most of us do, fools that we are.”

“How is that a double standard?”

“When did you allow a man the same latitude? If we make one mistake, even if we live a blameless life afterwards, you never allow us to live it down. And it’s the women who perpetuate our guilt. You whisper it to each other, to your husbands and sons, even to strangers, all in the name of protecting the innocent.” He made a derisive noise. “You’re no more innocent than the devil himself. In fact, if the Devil ever decides to come to earth, I bet he’ll come as a woman.”

Maybe Satan already had. Maybe he came as Queenie
.

“You have an extremely poor opinion of women, don’t you?”

“I haven’t found any reason to change it.”

“I don’t know which of my misdeeds has earned your greatest condemnation, but if you think I’d shrink from fighting for my freedom, you have a very poor understanding of women … ladies or otherwise.”

“I don’t think ladies are any different from women, except women are more honest.”

“Why do I get the feeling you’re talking about someone else?”

Victoria’s question silenced Trinity. He realized he had let his carefully sealed emotions seep into his voice. He had to watch what he said. He didn’t want Victoria to know about Queenie.

He had always prided himself on his self-control, but ever since he decided to come after Victoria, thoughts of Queenie had plagued him almost constantly. For years he’d tried to forget her. Several times he’d believed he had, but she never stayed away for long. He had to get her out of his mind if he hoped to make it back to Texas alive. He had to be constantly alert if he wanted to be ready for Buc and Victoria’s uncle, and thinking about Queenie always ruined his concentration.

“I wasn’t talking about anybody in particular,” Trinity answered. “Just my general experience with women.”

“If you treated them all the way you treated me, I’m not surprised. Even fallen women take it unkindly when a man tells nothing but lies.”

“What makes you think I know only fallen women?”

“If you knew any decent women, you wouldn’t feel this way.”

“The only
decent
women I’ve ever met were whores. They may not measure up to your idea of a lady, but they didn’t shoot their husbands in the back.”

“It’s pointless to talk to anybody with your warped judgment,” Victoria said. “Let me know when we reach camp, that is if I’m still conscious. Until then I relieve you of the responsibility of talking to me.”

Trinity took her at her word, but Victoria found herself wishing he hadn’t. She couldn’t imagine what had happened to make him think so badly of women. She wished he would tell her, but she knew he wouldn’t. At least not now.

She doubted he would ever listen to anything she said until he unburdened himself of some of his venomous anger, but she didn’t know how to help him do it.

As much as she hated to admit it, she still wanted Trinity to like her. She also wanted to help him. Maybe it was because she was a woman and felt compelled to nurture. Maybe it was because she had become so fascinated by him, she wanted to know everything about him. Maybe it was because she wanted to keep her mind off her own problems. Maybe it was because she wanted him to help her prove her innocence rather than take her back to a cruel punishment. Whatever the reason, she hated to see anyone suffer. And as much as Trinity tried to hide it, he did suffer.

Or maybe it was because she still liked him.

“We’ll stop here for the night.”

Trinity pulled up on a ledge of rock which projected about ten feet out from the face of the mountain. A thick canopy of pine and oak filtered out the fading light. A jumble of boulders hid them from the trail. They couldn’t even be seen from above. He couldn’t have found a more perfect place to hide.

Victoria didn’t care where they were. She felt like she had been in a saddle most of her life. The throbbing in her ankle had been joined by the aching in her bottom, wrists, and hands. At the moment, she didn’t care where she slept or if she ever ate again. She just wanted to get out of the saddle.

Trinity dismounted. He climbed a short way up the slope to check their back trail. Satisfied no one followed, he returned to Victoria.

“It’s no use trying to escape. We’re so far from your uncle’s place no one would ever find you. You wouldn’t last the night in the woods. At the very least there are cougars and wolves. Bears, too, but I don’t think any of them are grizzlies.” Trinity knew grizzlies almost never came this far south, but maybe she wouldn’t know.

She didn’t speak. Trinity untied her feet and reached out to her. She didn’t respond.

“Are you going to let me help you down, or should I just let you topple over?”

Victoria gave him a withering look, but she still refused to speak.

“Sure is going to be a long night,” Trinity said. “I can do many things, but nobody ever said I was good at making conversation.”

Victoria opened her mouth to make a reply, but closed it again. Trinity chuckled.

“Don’t try so hard.”

Trinity lifted Victoria down from the saddle. He laughed when she tried to kick him, but she refused to break her silence. Quite suddenly Trinity grew tired of baiting her.

“Sit down. If you think you could behave long enough to eat your dinner, I’ll untie your hands. If you promise not to escape during the night, I won’t tie you to a tree.”

Victoria remained standing, so he sat her down.

“I don’t like repeating myself. I’ve got a lot of things to do, so I can’t afford to pay much attention to your whims or sulks. Well get along better if you remember that.”

Only Trinity had trouble remembering it himself. She looked so tired. Though she glared at him in defiance, she looked lonely, like she had been abandoned by everyone she loved and depended on.

That made him want to protect her, to hold her tight and assure her everything would be all right. But how could he feel that way and take her back to jail?

He resolutely put the question out of his mind. There was no solution. Whether he liked it or not, he had a job to do. Thinking about it would only torture himself needlessly.

After Trinity tied her feet once more, he turned his attention to the horses. He had to take good care of them. They would have to carry them all the way to Texas. He didn’t have any extra mounts, and he didn’t want to have to stop and buy some. That would make his trail too easy to follow. After he had unsaddled the horses and rubbed them down, he staked out Victoria’s grey in a pocket below where there was a little grass.

Victoria was still sitting where he left her when he got back.

“Would you like something to eat? I forgot,” Trinity said when she didn’t reply, “you’re not talking to me. It doesn’t matter much. I’m used to camping by myself. I enjoy the silence.”

Only he didn’t tonight. He built a fire like he always did. He made coffee like he always did. He heated water and put in some dried beef and a few chips of dried vegetables like he always did. He fried bacon and set a can of beans in the coals to heat. Usually he liked the time alone. He found the peace a restorative, especially after a long chase.

But tonight he felt tense and jumpy. He rubbed the muscles in his shoulders and the back of his neck, but they remained unyielding. He could feel the ache of tension throughout his limbs. A muscle above his eyebrow quivered involuntarily, an infallible sign of stress. Even his voice had a sharp edge on it.

“Time to eat. Do you want me to untie you?”

Victoria said nothing.