Ashes of Roses (Tales of the Latter Kingdoms Book 4) (25 page)

M
y aunt’s
face went pale as I told her of her doom, but then she nodded briskly and said, “Ah, well, it was a risk I chose to run, and the consequences could have been much worse. It is not as if I have not lived outside the borders of Sirlende these past two decades. I daresay I can do it again if I must.”

I had come here alone — that is, as alone as I could be these days. Two guards waited for me some ten paces away, studiously attempting to appear as if they were not listening to every word. Torric had offered to come with me, but I thought this might be easier without him. Now, though, I wished I had his comforting presence nearby. However, as I had made my decision and could not change it, I had no choice but to press ahead.

What my aunt saw in my face, I could not say, but she gave me a weary little smile and went on, “My dear girl, we have accomplished everything we set out to do. You are to be Empress of Sirlende, and you will be forever away from that terrible woman your father was foolish enough to marry. Please do tell me that at least
she
will not get away free in all this.”

I shook my head at once. “Hardly. Torric — that is, I mean the Emperor — has said that because I was the one wronged, I should be the one to decide her punishment. I am sure she is in a state already, because his solicitors have been demanding to see my father’s will, and to examine the lease on the estate, and a great many other matters having to do with the disposal of the assets that should have come to me. But I have not yet decided what I should do.”

“Whatever you do decide, I know it will be the right thing.”

My aunt stretched out her hands to me, and I went and took them, reaching through the bars to do so. From somewhere behind me I heard a muffled oath from one of the men-at-arms sent to accompany me, and the movement of heavy feet on the stone floor, as if he thought to intercede. I looked at him over my shoulder and shook my head, and he stopped where he was, although I noticed his hand still rested on the hilt of the short sword he wore.

Aunt Therissa’s cold fingers closed on mine, and her dark eyes glinted with amusement. “You see? You are the Empress already, if not in name. When is the wedding to be?”

“Soon,” I told her. “The preparations are already under way, and now that I have all that wretched black dye out of my hair, Torric says there is really nothing to delay us, save Lord Hein wringing his hands and saying that he cannot possibly organize an imperial wedding in such a short amount of time.”

“I can see how that might be difficult.” Some of the light faded from her face. “I wish I could be there to see it, but I can tell from your expression that the Emperor wishes me to be gone soon, and quietly, so the scandal might die down as soon as possible.”

“I fear so.” I released her hands then, and said, “I knew it was quite out of the question to have you attend, but oh, Aunt Therissa, how I wish you could be there! You are the only family I have.”

She blinked, and I saw tears glisten in her eyes. “Oh, my dear girl, you will have a new family now. I do not envy you your future mother-in-law, but from everything I have heard, the Princess Lyarris is a lovely young woman, and of course you will have your husband.”

This much was true; we had only been acquainted for a short time, but I had already come to love the Crown Princess as if she were my own sister — which she soon would be. After suffering the cruelties of my stepsisters for so many years, it had come as quite a revelation that Lyarris looked on me as a welcome addition to the family, and not as a rival for her brother’s affections.

“Yes,” I said, although with some sadness, “that is true, but it would be better if you could be here as well.”

“I cannot argue with that. But I will take up my wandering path and have a whole new set of adventures, so let us not be sad, Ashara.”

The brave smile with which she said this made me blink away the tears that had threatened to form in my own eyes. “And will you write to me, and tell me of your adventures?”

“As best I can. Now go, my dear, and tell your future husband that I am quite content with my fate, and that he can smuggle me out of the palace whenever he deems wise. I will not argue with his decision, for I daresay it was the best solution he could think of.”

I nodded. “Thank you, Aunt Therissa. Thank you for — well, for everything.”

The gaze she sent me was warm and loving, and I knew I would hold it in my heart until the end of my days. “You are most welcome, my child. Go, and be the Empress I know you have it within you to be. Make me proud.”

Her words made my throat tighten with unshed tears, and so I could only whisper, “I will,” before I fled the dungeon, the two guards falling in behind me as I made my way to the light of the world above and the future that awaited me.

B
y that time
my presence had been made known to all the denizens of the palace, so although I saw people staring at me and my escort, no one moved to stop me, or to ask my business there. Everyone knew that I would be marrying the Emperor not two days hence. Even so, I found it difficult to keep my chin up, to prevent myself from meeting any of their curious glances as I made my way up to Torric’s suite.

He knew I would be returning to him there, and so had made sure to keep his schedule open so he would not be occupied with some meeting or another. Indeed, I thought he must have been waiting for me at the door, for he was there almost as soon as I entered. The guards closed the door behind me, and Torric took me in his arms, saying nothing, merely holding me, letting me simply be with him until I felt ready to speak.

At length I pulled away and said quietly, “She understands, and she is ready. If I were you, I would not delay.”

“I had not planned to,” he replied. He reached down to touch my cheek. “The preparations have been made. She will go in the escort of a troop of guards, who will see to her safety until she reaches the border with South Eredor. And she will go with a spare horse, and several changes of new gowns, and enough coin to support her for the next year. She will not be cast entirely adrift.”

His words did far more than merely reassure me — they sent a wave of warmth through me, for this was proof, more than anything else he had done, that he wanted me to be happy, to know that my aunt should not suffer because of the punishment he was forced to give her. Truly, I could not have asked for anything more, save to have her stay with me, and I knew that was not possible.

“Thank you, Torric,” I whispered.

He seemed to understand that I did not wish to speak of it further, and so he only gave me an encouraging smile and asked, “And…that other matter? Have you made your decision?”

“I-I think so.” Truly, I had been avoiding the unpleasant topic, but I knew I must manage the question of my stepmother, and soon.

“Well enough. You should be Empress first, I think, so you have a few more days before that confrontation.” His dark eyes warmed, and he bent to kiss me, his lips so very welcome on mine. When he began to pull away, I said,

“No, Torric. Kiss me. Kiss me again, so I might forget everything save you.”

And, the gods bless him, he did just that…if only for a little while.

G
abrinne clapped
her hands together and let out a little squeal of excitement, then said, “Truly, I do believe you are the most beautiful bride Sirlende has ever seen!”

I sent a fond smile at her, even as I shook my head. “I am not entirely sure of that, but I do thank you.”

The familiar toss of her curls, followed by a beseeching stare in Lyarris’ direction. “Your Highness, tell Ashara she is sadly mistaken.”

“I fear I have to side with Gabrinne in this,” my future sister said. “You are exquisite. But I do believe we need to stop debating the topic and go downstairs. Everyone is waiting.”

At those words I felt a knot begin to form in my stomach, and I swallowed. Oh, yes, I wanted this. Rather, I wanted Torric, and if I had to take being Empress of Sirlende along with being his wife, then it was a sacrifice I would gladly make. I chose not to think of the throngs waiting in the temple on the ground floor of the palace, and instead of the man who would soon be my husband.

“I am ready,” I said, and both Lyarris and Gabrinne came forth and threaded their arms through mine, so they might guide me to the temple as custom dictated.

As we made our way through the palace — followed as always by a complement of guards — I thought of how glad I was to have these two to stand with me as my attendants. Lyarris had been a treasure, helping me gather my wardrobe, giving quiet advice on how to manage the intricacies of court life, standing as a bulwark between me and the sharp tongue of my future mother-in-law. And Gabrinne had been no less important, her laughter buoying me up when I was weary, her mere presence enough to lift my spirits. Her own wedding was planned for the following week.

“And I have all but gotten Senric to agree that we must stay in Iselfex this winter, so you and I should have a jolly time,” she’d told me just the day before, heartening me further, as I knew I would have another friend to stay by my side and help me through my first months as Empress.

I needed that courage now as we made the long walk down the palace’s main corridor to the great temple of Minauth that stood at the far end. The hallway was choked with well-wishers who could not fit in the temple itself, and on every wall were swags of autumn leaves and berries and the hearty few flowers that still lingered at this season. Then it was through the great arched doorway, down the long runner of figured crimson that led to the dais where Torric waited.

With all those eyes upon me, I was more glad than ever of the exquisite gown of blush-colored damask embroidered with soft rosy pearls that Lyarris’ seamstresses had somehow managed to create within the space of only a few days. My hair, now returned to its usual burnished russet, streamed down my back, held in place by a circlet of rose gold and pearls.

Once we reached the dais, Lyarris and Gabrinne broke away from me and took their seats, leaving me to approach Torric alone. This was how it was always done, to show that a bride had now left the shelter of her family and friends and gone willingly to her new husband.

I could not let myself think of my Aunt Therissa, for as happy as I was, I knew I would weep at her absence. Better to stare up at Torric, at the elegant strength of his profile, the width of his shoulders in the fine doublet of wine-colored velvet, and to think of how he made my heart beat faster every time he turned that dark, long-lashed gaze upon me.

What followed afterward was a blur — the speaking of the ritual words, the drinking of the wine — everything save the pressure of his mouth on mine as he kissed me at the end, kissed me and then announced to everyone that they now looked upon the Empress of Sirlende. And the oddity of everyone bowing, and realizing that they were bowing to
me
, Ashara Millende — now Ashara Deveras — who once was no more than a scullery maid, and yet now by some miracle had been made their Empress.

More blurs, as the company moved on to the great banquet hall, where a feast had been laid out for us all, and from there to dancing and drinking, swirling in Torric’s arms, everything a whirl of color and light and sound. Until at last we broke away from the celebrations, and made our way upstairs to his apartments — my apartments now as well, I realized — and he pulled me close and kissed me, his mouth sweet with wine and desire.

But then he stopped, his dark gaze searching my face. “It is finally here,” he said.

I understood what he meant. That first kiss in the woods, every embrace which had followed…they had all led to this moment. Perhaps I should have been afraid, but I knew something of what was to come next. A shiver went through me, but not of fear.

Anticipation.

“Make me your wife, Torric,” I whispered.

At once his arms were around me, lifting me, taking me out of the sitting room and on into his bedchamber. Then his hands were on the laces of my gown, until the fabric slipped away to lie in a shining heap at my feet, and he pulled at my chemise, lifting it over my head so that I stood naked before him. But I wasn’t cold, no, not with the heat of need coursing through me. Unashamed, I unbuckled his belt and let it drop, then undid the buttons of his doublet, and of his shirt underneath. How beautiful his body was, lean and muscled, with a light dusting of dark hair that trailed down beneath the waistband of his breeches.

He let out a breath, said, “You are a glory,” and leaned down to kiss my breasts, to send every nerve in my body alive with desire, and then lifted me, setting me on the bed before he unbuttoned his breeches, and there was nothing more between us, only our bodies pressed together, aching with want, until finally at last we were one, joined in a way I could never have imagined, all the emptiness of my life before this finally filled.

He loved me, and made me whole.

I
t would have been so
pleasant to spend our days abed, to forget the world and everything in it save one another. But that was not our destiny…and I had one task which still lay ahead of me.

“You are ready for this?” Torric asked, and bent to kiss me at the nape of my neck, pushing aside the mass of my hair.

Once again shivers worked their way over me, and I marveled at how this body of mine, one I thought I knew, could give me such pleasure. How I wished Torric could trail those kisses lower, pull away my gown, take me to bed once more.

Later. For now we were expected in the audience chamber.

“As ready as I can be,” I replied. “But it must be done. Then there will be nothing tying me to my past.”

He nodded, dark eyes warm with understanding, and took my hand. We left our chambers that way, fingers twined around one another’s, as the guards fell in around us to provide an escort down all those staircases, through all those corridors, until at last we entered the grand hall where the Emperor and Empress conducted their business.