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Authors: Beth Solheim

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BOOK: At Witt's End
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Rodney jumped in the van, slumped down, and kicked his legs across the aisle, propping his feet on Lora's seat. “Are you going to snitch on me, too?"

"I don't think she's concerned with what you do, Rodney,” Sadie said.

"Yes she is. She has the hots for me."

Michael tapped Sadie on the back. “Do you have to take Belly to the dog doctor?"

Puzzled, Sadie turned around to look at the boy. “What for?"

"You told Mr. Bakke that Belly got his nose bent out of joint. It got bent when you made him go outside because he rolled in rotten fish on the beach. Remember?” Michael put his chin on the back of the seat. “I looked at his nose, but I couldn't tell if it was bent. Maybe you should have the doctor look at it. I want Belly to get better."

"I think you're right,” Sadie said. “I'll take care of that while you're at the nursing home. When you get back, he'll be fine."

"Dumb kid,” Rodney said and leaned his head back on the van's window.

At 5:00 p.m., Sadie returned to the nursing home to gather the crossers. She pulled in under the portico, descended the van's steps, grabbed the no-parking sign, and tugged it down the driveway away from the van.

Theo climbed the van steps and sat in the first seat next to the door. His head swiveled back and forth while Sadie carried on a conversation with the residents under the portico. “What a pitiful situation,” he said when Sadie returned to the driver's seat. “A bunch of old people sitting around waiting to die."

"Would you prefer they waited out on the street?” Sadie shot Theo a ‘you're as dense as a doorknob’ look.

Theo sat with his knees tight together and the briefcase resting on his lap. “I see you failed Humor 101."

"Coming from the master of comedy, that's a pretty strong statement.” Sadie looked toward the portico and tried to see beyond the residents clustered near the doorway.

Sadie patted her hair. “Notice anything new?"

"Other than that skunk on your head?"

Sadie turned her head back and forth and gazed in the rearview mirror. “I can't help it if most of the highlights ended up in a row on top.” She picked at the blond spikes and tried to move some of them sideways. “Big Leon said it'll look better after he cuts off some of the streak."

"I'd schedule that appointment if I were you.” Theo sighed impatiently then tipped his wrist to look at his watch. “What's taking them so long? I don't have all day."

"You have thirty days,” Sadie said. “And you've used up about 10 of them. How come you're always the first one back on the van? Are you sure you're putting your energy into finding someone on the brink?"

"Spare the sermon. I've had all I can tolerate for one day. Lora is sobbing in one of hallways because Rodney's harassing her again. That wretched creature has enough to worry about. And the boys are hatching a plan to find a murderer."

"A murderer?"

"Tim's convinced his father was murdered."

Staring at Theo, Sadie said, “Did he tell you that?"

"No. But I overheard them talking about it. Something about a rifle."

"A rifle? That doesn't make sense. Richard wasn't shot. But Tim's not the first to question his father's death. Nan's friend, Lon, is concerned, too."

"It's amazing how little minds fabricate huge scenarios, isn't it?” Theo said.

Sadie bit at the corner of her mouth. Theo riled her. His contempt for those beneath him increased by the day causing him to lose sight of his declaration.

Sadie pushed the release lever and the van's door swung shut. She grabbed the keys off the dash, started the van, and pulled away from the no-parking zone.

"What are you doing?” Theo cried. “What about the others?"

"They'll have to wait. I've waited for them, so they can wait for me.” Sadie drove two miles before bringing the van to a standstill at Nordeen Point, a public park situated on the north side of Pinecone Lake.

Sadie got out of the driver's seat and sat directly across from Theo. “I want to know how it went today, Theo. Were you able to zero in on anyone near death?"

"Aren't they all?"

"You're quick to criticize, but they're not all waiting to die. What makes you think their lives weren't as good as yours."

"Because they're not me,” Theo said under his breath.

Sadie sat on the edge of the seat with her legs dangling in the aisle. “Did you ever enjoy yourself? Or did you spend your entire life with that steel rod up your butt?"

"There. That's exactly what I mean, Sadie,” Theo said. “You're as crass as they come. Your language is repulsive and you have no respect for anyone's feelings. Put yourself in my place and see how it feels to find out you're dead."

"You put yourself in my place and think about taking responsibility for one crosser after another,” Sadie said. “That's not a bed of geraniums, either."

Theo cringed. “Roses. It's roses. If you have to use a tired cliche, at least get it right".

"We're not going back to the cabin until you tell me something about your past."

"What do you need to know?"

"Tell me about your life. Did you marry? Do you have children? If you do, that must have been a miracle because I can't picture you having sex with that rod up your butt."

"Are you sure you're not Rodney's mother?"

Sadie grabbed her breasts and shook them. “Positive. Rodney said his old lady had big tits. Remember?” With palms up, Sadie wriggled her fingers to indicate she wanted him to talk. “I'm prepared to stay here all night if that's what it takes."

Staring out the window at the children playing on the swings, Theo said, “I'll allow two questions. Then I want to go back to the cabin."

"Were you married and do you have children?"

"That's two questions. But because they're related, I'll allow it as one."

"Are you a judge?” Sadie asked. “You've made a few comments that make me think you're a judge or a lawyer."

"Is that one of your questions?"

"No. But I need to know because I have some questions unrelated to being a crosser."

"If you want legal advice regarding that lawsuit, I'm not going to make any comments."

"Do you think we have a chance?"

"Not if the judge knows you.” Theo smiled.

"We're going to talk more about this later."

"I don't think so,” Theo responded with a slow shake of his head.

Theo and Sadie turned to watch a procession of cyclists ride past the van. Sadie grinned broadly and waved as one of the cyclists recognized her and shouted a greeting.

"I need sound legal advice. Maybe you're not intelligent enough to help me."

"I beg to differ. And quit using reverse psychology. It won't work."

Setting her lime crystal earrings in motion as she sat forward, Sadie said, “Tell me about your family. The more I know, the easier it will be to help you."

"I don't need your help. I've already made my declaration. I'm going to the parallel world.” Theo held his hand up. “Before you ask, it's none of your business why I've chosen to go there."

"What if I ask that as one of my questions?"

"I don't think you will. There are too many other things you'd rather know, so think before you ask."

He placed the briefcase on the seat and turned to face Sadie. “I didn't marry until later in life. My wife had two children from a previous marriage. They became the scourge of my existence. So did my wife. From the day they entered my home, my life became a living hell.” Theo turned to watch a child spin the merry-go-round. “This past year I actually considered divorce. They had nearly drained me financially, but then something happened that made it impossible for me to divorce her."

Sadie drew in a quick breath.

Theo held up his hand in warning. “You have one question left. If you ask the correct question, it will answer the others."

"I'd like to know what happened so you couldn't divorce her. I'd also like to know how you died. That's more a curiosity question, so I guess that's not important."

"Like I said, if you ask the correct question, you'll have the answers."

Tilting her head upward, Sadie closed her eyes and tried to paint a mental roadmap of what Theo had told her over the past ten days. Her first impressions clouded the image. “You haven't given me any clues so I have to go with my gut. What little I know about you leads me to believe I know the correct question."

"Get on with it,” Theo said. “I'd prefer not to stay here all night."

Sadie tapped her teeth against the tip of her violet fingernail and took a deep breath. “What's in the briefcase?"

[Back to Table of Contents]

16
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Theo clapped his hands together in a genteel manner. “Sadie you amaze me. I didn't think you'd ask the right question. I should repent for my erroneous first impression, but I'm not going to."

"I don't understand why everyone thinks I'm such an odd duck,” Sadie said.

Theo shook his head. “Do you really not understand? Do you think everyone is wrong?"

"They're wrong if they form an opinion and refuse to change it.” Frustrated with Theo's high view of himself, Sadie blurted, “My first impression of you was dreadful. Your attitude stinks."

"My attitude? What about Rodney's attitude? That man's dangerous and you're questioning my attitude?"

"Rodney doesn't hide his feelings like you do. We may fear him, but we know exactly what he thinks."

Theo's scowl indicated disagreement as he placed the briefcase back on his lap. He thrust his chin in the air and turned to stare at the barefoot children running along the beach.

"I think people form first impressions with their eyes instead of their brains,” Sadie said. “When I don't understand something, I don't trust it. But at least I talk about it. You're hiding something. That means turmoil."

Theo's indifference irritated Sadie and she kicked at the edge of his seat until the tip of her sandal connected. “It's fear, you know. It's fear that makes you put on that macho mask. You're afraid of what lies ahead, but you won't admit it. I can wait. I've got enough patience for both of us."

Sadie scooted back across the van seat and leaned her head against the window. “It's too bad patience hasn't put an end to my concerns about Aanders seeing a rainbow at midnight."

With mouth agape, Theo let out a sharp breath. “My dear woman, what on earth are you talking about?” When Sadie didn't answer, he said, “I shouldn't have to clarify myself. I don't have the faintest idea what rainbows have to do with Aanders or patience."

"Aanders is a death-coach-in-training. They aren't allowed to counsel their own crossers until they've seen a rainbow at midnight.” She watched Theo's head shake in disbelief, his chin swiveling against his fist. “Trainees have to work under the guidance of another death coach. They train until they're deemed worthy. A rainbow at midnight is a sign the trainee has earned the right to counsel their own crossers."

"Absurd,” Theo said.

"Skeptic,” Sadie said, wagging her finger back and forth in front of her face. “I learned this when I was in training. I haven't made anything up. It's the way it is."

"Maybe you should rewrite the book."

"There is no book."

"Then how do you know you're doing it right?"

"Quit asking questions.” Sadie stood and moved back into the driver's seat. Turning to look at Theo she said, “Tell me what's in the briefcase."

Theo ran his hand across the leather. He placed his finger on the gold numbers and rotated three dials in sequence to complete the combination. The clasps snapped open.

Sadie rose and stood on her tiptoes. She peered over his shoulder. Theo unfastened another clasp and slid his hand into a silk pocket lining the lid.

He removed his hand and held up a small, four-inch-square black bag. He grasped it gingerly between his thumb and forefinger before cupping it in his other hand.

"You've been protecting your briefcase because of a little black bag? What's in it?"

"Diamonds,” Theo closed the lid. “Diamonds worth a fortune."

Sadie dropped into the seat across from him. “My Lord,” she gasped. “Are you sure?"

"Would I protect this briefcase if I weren't sure? Of course I'm sure."

Sadie reached for the bag. “What will you do with it?"

"I'm not giving it to you, if that's what you think. This bag is going with me.” He placed the velvet bag back in the case. His tone oozed bitterness as his resentful glare settled on Sadie.

No wonder the man wore black. It matched his disposition. “You can't do that. Give it to your family. We'll make up a story and I'll make sure they get it."

"That's out of the question. I refuse to let them benefit from my hard work."

"Do they know about the diamonds?"

"They do. But they'll never get their hands on them. That's the good thing about my death. I was upset when my wife found out a client left me an inheritance. That was supposed to be my secret. My private bankroll. After I claimed the inheritance and had the diamonds valued, I hung on to them for several days trying to decide what to do.” Theo spun the combination and checked the clasps to see if they had locked.

"If you remember, I told you I couldn't divorce my wife. Because I received the inheritance while we were married, she's protected under the fifty-fifty divorce statutes. My wife gets half. There's no way to fight it. She and those self-seeking ingrates of hers would drain me financially all over again."

Theo set the case on the floor. “Then I had a change of plan. I decided to cash in the diamonds and file for divorce. They could have their half and I'd enjoy what was left after taxes. I'd be rid of those egotistical leeches and have funds left to live out the rest of my life. That decision was like a last-minute reprieve from the death penalty."

"Give it to charity. Give it to a church,” Sadie said. “At least you'd know your life was worth something."

"Like I said before, that's out of the question. I clawed my way to the top by sheer determination and I'll be damned if I'm going to share it with anyone."

"But Theo..."

"I don't want to hear it. People have taken advantage of me all my life. I'm sick of it. My wife and her children lived beyond our means and expected me to cover their debts. I was forced to do it so I wouldn't become the joke of the judicial system.” Stabbing the air with his finger Theo said, “I lived nine years of pure hell because of those bastards."

BOOK: At Witt's End
11.07Mb size Format: txt, pdf, ePub
ads

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