B00CAXBD9C EBOK (4 page)

‘Thank you, Marriage Counsellor Parker, but I have a feeling that you are addressing the wrong party.’

‘Shall I speak to your wife? What shall I say? “Darling, in strict confidence, I’m banging your husband. This isn’t really necessary. If only you weren’t so dullsville he might fancy you again. Liven up a bit, and back he will come.”’

They both started to laugh. ‘You
are
a bitch. Is that why I love you?’

‘No,’ she giggled. ‘You
know
why you love me.’

They got up and she busied herself in the kitchen making sandwiches while David prowled around the flat thinking how he could bring up the subject of her finances again. She had annoyed him with her little speech about not wanting to marry. But really he wasn’t too annoyed, because on thinking it over he decided she had only said it as a defence mechanism. She knew they couldn’t get married, so to save face she had probably convinced herself that she didn’t want marriage anyway. On thinking it over even further, he was almost pleased, because it put him in the enviable position of being able to have his cake and eat it too. He didn’t really want to leave Linda. In his own way he loved her, although she had ceased to attract him sexually shortly after they were married. He had compensated for this by different affairs throughout the years, and to Linda he had been more than generous materially. She was the perfect wife figure. A lovely hostess and mother.

No, he certainly didn’t want to leave Linda. He felt no particular guilt about being unfaithful to her. Although if
she
was to him… But no, that was unthinkable. The very idea of Linda being unfaithful was ridiculous.

Claudia was licking mayonnaise off her fingers in the kitchen. She wore a pink kimono and had tied her hair away from her face.

‘You look about fifteen,’ he said.

‘And you look about fifty. What
is
on your mind? Are you brooding because I turned down your gallant proposal?’

‘I want to talk to you seriously. Bring the sandwiches and come and sit down.’

She followed him into the living room, and munching a sandwich, sat down on the floor near his feet. ‘What seems to be bothering you, David?’

‘Look, darling. I’ve been thinking a lot about you.’

She laughed. ‘I should hope so.’

‘This is serious,’ he continued. ‘I’ve been worried about how you manage financially. This apartment can’t be cheap, and I want to help you out. I mean, frankly, where
do
you get your money?’

She sat very still. Her eyes glinted dangerously. However, she managed to keep her voice pleasant. ‘Well, baby,’ she said sweetly, ‘what makes you want to know?’

He didn’t observe the danger signals. ‘Of course I want to know. Do you get an allowance from your father, or what?’

‘Come
on.
I haven’t seen my family in five years, and I don’t care if I ever see them again. My old man wouldn’t give me a penny to go to the bathroom with.’ She sat silently then, and David realized that she had no intention of answering him.

‘Claudia, I want to know,’ he said sharply.

She arose. ‘I don’t like being questioned. I’m not asking you for anything. I don’t want
anything
from you!’ She started to shout. ‘Leave me alone with your questions. What’s on your mind? Where do you think I get my money from? Do you think I’m a whore? Well, if I was, wouldn’t I be asking you for money?’ She was crying now, and he was shocked that he had provoked such anger. ‘It’s
my
business where I get my money from, and if you don’t like the idea of that, then let’s just forget it,’ she yelled.

He caught her mood of fury. ‘All right,’ he said coldly, ‘we’ll forget it.’ He marched into the bedroom and dressed. She didn’t follow him.

When he came out, she was sitting on the sofa reading a magazine and didn’t look up.

He stood there, undecided about whether to walk out or not. ‘Are you going to tell me?’ he demanded.

She continued reading and didn’t answer him.

‘Good-bye,’ he said, and left.

In the hall outside her front door he immediately regretted this move. He couldn’t go home, and he debated making it up with Claudia, but that was impossible. If he gave way to her now, he would be admitting defeat, and he never admitted defeat to any woman. No, he decided, let her burn a little, and she would soon come running back. They always did.

He went downstairs to his car, having decided to spend the night in a Turkish bath. He was puzzled about why Claudia was so secretive about the source of her income; it could only mean that there was something he wouldn’t like. Well, in that case, when she told him, he would stop it, whatever it was, and then she would be dependent on him, which was exactly the way he wanted it.

He drove to the Turkish baths in Jermyn Street, and after going through the hot and cold steam baths and having a massage, he was quite happy to settle down in his small white cubicle, where he promptly fell asleep. Tomorrow he would settle everything.

Paul looked younger than Linda remembered him. He was wearing a black sweater and tight black trousers. She had decided to wear a plain dark-blue dress after discarding several other outfits. They met at a prearranged spot. Paul helped her out of her car and said he would drive, as he knew the way.

‘I’m glad you changed your mind. What did it? My unbelievable charm?’ He grinned.

‘I don’t know.’ All the wine she had drunk and the rushing to get ready had finally made her tired. ‘Maybe I shouldn’t have come. I don’t know why I’m here, really.’

He looked at her. ‘I’m glad you’re here. I don’t think you’ll be sorry you came. In fact, I promise you that.’

They drove a short way along the Heath until Paul pulled into the drive of an old rambling house. Its windows were ablaze with lights, and the belting voice of Solomon Burke screamed out from the stereo. A couple were arguing in the open doorway, and, as they arrived, several more people came pushing through the door with much laughter and yelling. Paul parked the car and they went in.

The scene that greeted their eyes was wild to say the least. The front door led into a small hall with big rooms off either side of it and a large staircase in the centre. The staircase was littered with various people, a lot of men with beards, girls sitting and standing, and everyone steadily drinking. The room on the right was filled with couples, dancing or just standing and necking. There appeared to be no furniture, only a rather battered stereo set balanced precariously on the windowsill. The room on the left featured a thin girl with stringy red hair taking off her clothes to the beat of some bongos being hammered on by a West Indian clad only in white shorts. No one was taking much notice of them. Mostly people were watching a blond boy at the other end of the room, who was standing on a chair, quite naked, reciting an obscene poem.

Paul squeezed Linda’s arm. ‘Come on,’ he said, leading her up the stairs, greeting people as he went. ‘Let’s get rid of your coat. Then we can get a drink.’

Upstairs there were more rooms equally devoid of furniture. Paul steered her into a room with a bed creaking under the weight of many coats. Two girls were staring deep into each other’s eyes in a corner, and another girl was either asleep or had passed out at the bottom of the bed.

Linda took off her coat and felt too dressed up in her neat blue dress. Paul said that she looked great, and took her to find a drink. They went downstairs to the room on the left. The redhead had abandoned her strip and was sitting on the floor, someone’s sweater covering her. She grabbed hold of Paul’s leg as he went by. ‘Hello, sexy. Wanna make it?’ Her voice was slurred. ‘I’ve got a great body. How ’bout you?’

Linda found herself separated from Paul, so she headed toward a table where the drinks appeared to be coming from.

A fat man pounced up behind her. ‘You look very smart,’ he said. ‘Who
are
you?’ His face was beaded with sweat and his breath a combination of onions and stale beer. ‘You want a drink?’

‘Yes, please,’ she said, trying to edge away from the full blast of his breath.

He poured her a very large Scotch in a cracked glass. She drank it down hastily.

‘Let us go and dance,’ he said, and put his arm around her waist. She could feel the hotness of his hand penetrate her dress through to her skin.

‘Not just now,’ she said, trying to disentangle herself.

He licked his pudgy lips, and then Paul arrived. ‘Hello, Bruno. I see you’ve met Linda.’

The fat man removed his arm. ‘Oh, she’s yours, is she?’ he said hastily. ‘I don’t know what they see in you.’ He wiped his mouth with a plump pink hand and ambled away.

Paul laughed. ‘Don’t take any notice of him,’ he said, and then was suddenly serious. ‘You’re great, you know that?’ He took her hand.

‘Thank you,’ she said. She had never been able to accept compliments easily. Quickly she drained her glass. ‘I’d like another drink.’

He poured her a large Scotch which she drank down fast, feeling its burning effect almost immediately. ‘I think I should go home,’ she said weakly. ‘I’m almost drunk, you know.’

‘I know.’ He pushed her toward the wall, and then leaned forward and kissed her.

She closed her eyes as she felt the intimacy of his tongue penetrate her lips. His mouth was persistent and demanding. She felt she should push him away but didn’t have the strength, and anyway, she didn’t want to. It was a long time since she had been kissed like this. David never kissed her anymore, and she had forgotten how exciting it could be.

‘Oh, so here you are.’ The whiny voice was familiar, the note of anger unmistakable. Paul straightened up. Melanie was standing there, her yellow hair hanging in a straight curtain around her thin, flushed face. ‘I thought you were coming back for me.’ She glared at Linda. ‘Or have you been so busy that you couldn’t find time?’

‘I’m sorry, Mel, thought I said I’d see you here.’

‘Well, you didn’t.’ Her voice was becoming shrill. ‘And how’s Mrs. Cooper? Recovered, I see.’

‘Can it, Mel,’ said Paul abruptly. He steered her away from Linda and into the hall. ‘Look, I’m sorry, but that’s the way it is.’

‘That’s the way what is?’ Her dull eyes filled with tears.

‘It’s been great, but we’ve been heading this way a long time now, and it’s best to forget it. I still like you and all that bit, but, well, you know…’

‘No, I don’t know. And anyway, what can you see in that old bag in there?’ She started to cry. ‘I hate you, Paul.’

‘Look, kid, you’re seventeen, there’ll be lots of other guys. You’ll soon forget me. We’re just not—’

‘We’re not what?’ she interrupted angrily. ‘God, I hate you!’

He shrugged and walked away. Linda was deep in conversation with the fat man again. ‘Do you want to go?’ he asked.

‘No.’ Her eyes were bright. She was now very drunk. ‘Bruno’s going to teach me a new dance.’

‘Bruno can find a girlfriend of his own. I’ll teach you anything you want to know.’ He warned Bruno off with a look, took her into the other room where the dancing was going on, and held her very tight. ‘I want to sleep with you,’ he whispered.

‘I want to sleep with you too,’ she whispered back. ‘I mean, I don’t want to, but it would be nice, but I… Oh, God, I think I had better get some air.’

He kissed her again. This time she kissed him back, and their mouths met in mutual enjoyment. They stood still among the dancers, lost in their own little world. His tongue explored her mouth, and she felt a sudden urgent desire for him. He pressed her very close and then released her.

‘You wait here,’ he said. ‘I’ll get your coat.’

She stood patiently waiting, the liquor she had drunk falling over her in waves. She couldn’t think clearly at all, her head buzzed, and she wanted to be back again in the safety of Paul’s arms. There was a lot of noise coming from the hall, and she wandered out there. Two men were fighting. It was the fat man, Bruno, and the West Indian who had been playing the bongos earlier. They screamed obscenities at each other and rolled about on the floor. No one tried to stop them.

‘Why are they fighting?’ she asked a girl standing near her.

‘Oh, darling, Bruno always has to fight with someone,’ the girl said. ‘It wouldn’t be Bruno if he didn’t.’

The West Indian’s nose began to bleed, and there was a lot of blood. Linda suddenly felt sick. She edged her way to the front door and out. The cold air had a slightly sobering effect. She went over to her car and sat in it.

Eventually Paul arrived. ‘I was worried. I thought you’d walked out on me.’ He got in the car and put his arm around her. She pulled away. ‘What’s the matter?’ he continued.

‘I feel terrible. I think I’m going to be sick.’

‘Oh, great. Let’s go back inside and I’ll get you upstairs to the bathroom.’

‘No. I don’t want to go back in there.’

‘You’ll feel better in a minute.’ He put his arm around her again, and this time she didn’t pull away. He kissed her, while his hands explored her body.

She felt weak and her head spun, and when she shut her eyes everything whirled round and round. She could feel Paul touching her, and his mouth on hers, but it all seemed like it was happening to someone else.

Abruptly he let go of her and started the car. They seemed to be driving for ages, but really it was no time at all. Then he was helping her out of the car, and they were climbing a lot of stairs, and then they were in a room, and he was pushing her onto a bed.

She didn’t struggle when he unzipped her dress and pulled it off, because, after all, this wasn’t really happening.

He kissed her slowly. The bed was soft, and she felt very comfortable. His arms were strong and warm, and his hands created a fantastic excitement in her. He rolled her over on her stomach and she felt him undoing her bra.

‘I’m not here,’ she whispered. ‘I’m on another planet. I’m very drunk, you shouldn’t take disadvantage of me. I’m at an advantage…’ She started to giggle.

He began to kiss her back, and then she was suddenly lost in a raging passion which seemed to go on forever and ever.

‘I love you,’ one of them said.