Bad Boy - A Stepbrother Romance (43 page)

My tone is disbelieving. He's lying, I can tell.

Adam gives me a crooked grin. "I think, if you weren't family, I'd already have a major crush on you," he says cheekily, giving me a wink.

I walk out of there so fast I nearly topple over, slamming the door as I exit.

Mechanically, I head straight to my room, lock the door and plop down on my bed.

Blink. Blink. Blink.

Did he really just say that?

He couldn't really think so, could he? I'm a fat, unattractive slob. No one in his or her right mind would think I'm pretty.

But as I think it through, a smile starts to play on my lips, and for the first time since my dad died, a sliver of hope runs through my heart, the start of something beautiful.

It takes me ages to find Tessa. I have no idea why she reacted like that, running off like I'd mortally insulted her. But what struck me more was the genuine hurt I saw in her eyes. She was struggling, battling with her own demons, and I'd somehow made it worse without meaning to.

Guilt gnaws at me as I walk around the farmer's market, trying to catch a glimpse of her. Yet she is nowhere to be seen. Finally, I head back to the parking lot, and as soon as I round the corner, I see Tessa leaning against my bike.

I hurry to get to her, my heart swelling with emotions I shouldn't be feeling. She refuses to meet my eyes, her hands crossed defensively in front of her body like I'm going to hurt her.

"Where did you go?" I ask her softly, but she doesn't respond. Her eyes are red and puffy; she's shaking a little. 

It fucking pains me to see her hurting. I would do anything, anything in the world to make it all better for Tessa, but she keeps pushing me away. She won't let me in.

"Can we go now?" she asks brusquely. "I've had enough of this place." I can tell she's annoyed, so I don't object. I walk over to her, giving her a helmet and strapping on mine. We get on the bike, and as excited I could be about her hands around my waist, it feels all wrong. Something's not right.

The ride is tense, as are her fingers digging into my hips. We arrive at my house and she climbs off the bike without saying another word. But I'm not done just yet.

"Tessa?" I call after her as she starts heading back into the house. It looks like she won't even acknowledge me, but after a moment's hesitation, she finally turns back and gives me a sad look.

"I'm going to work now - do you want to come with me?" I ask her. I want to give her a choice in this. Sure, we agreed she'd help me out, but if she needs time to herself, I'll let her have it. I have a feeling that being social might help her, though.

She's deciding, biting her bottom lip. I know Tessa well - she'll want to curl up in her bed and push away the thoughts of the world being out to get her. But I don't want her to do that. There's more to life than she thinks.

"Well, I'm heading down there now," I say, breaking eye contact with her. I start up the bike again and get ready to leave, my heart beating expectantly, hoping she will join me.

"What should I wear?" Tessa asks in a shaky voice. That puts a smile on my face.

"I'll give you a uniform at work," I tell her. "Come on!"

She walks over to me, and I see the ghost of a smile on her lips, which makes me so ecstatic. 

Maybe we can still fix this mess.

Maybe, just maybe, it's not too late for the two of us.

***

My restaurant is only a short drive away. This is what I leave and breathe for, my heart, my soul.

I found solace in cooking, a statement that might sound silly, but has brought me so much joy over the years. 

It's not just the fact that I'm damn good at my job. It's the feeling when I get a compliment from the guests, the rush I feel when we have orders coming in. It's the way I want to constantly better myself, make amazing food, and make people happy.

There's already a huge smile plastered on my face as we pull up in front of the restaurant. I park in my spot, and then help Tessa get off the bike. Her hair is a little windswept, and the swelling in her eyes has gone down. She looks a little better, but I can tell she's nervous.

"This is going to be fun," I promise her, giving her a wide grin. "You'll love it."

Her smile is nervous, but she nods nonetheless and I take her hand on a whim. It's a stupid thing to do, something that will make me want all the wrong things from Tessa. Yet I can't resist.

Her skin is like satin against mine, beautiful, soft and tempting. I'm fighting the temptation hard, knowing I need to reel myself in before I do something stupid.

"Let's go inside," I say softly, and she nods.

We walk towards the lot and I explain the placement of the restaurant quickly.

It's not mine, not really. I'm just the head chef, which gives me a lot of creative freedom. I'd love to own a place of my own, but for now, this will have to do. I like the owner, Randy, as well. He's a great guy and never nags me when I try something new, while someone else might give me shit the moment I tried to change the menu.

"Randy's not around a lot, though," I explain to Tessa, when her fingers tighten around mine. I give her a look out of the corner of my eye, seeing a shy smile playing on her lips.

Fuck, I want her so badly.

I've always wanted Tessa, always had to fight the desire to make her mine. But there are more important things that need to be done before I stake my claim.

She's hurting. She's scared. I want her to feel great on her own, before I enter the picture. She needs to be happy with herself - something I'm pretty sure she hasn't been, ever.

"What kind of food do you cook?" she asks me curiously.

"Whatever I want," I grin widely. "That's the best part. Obviously we'll have themed nights when we do Italian or French, but I like to focus on food that's in season."

We've walked up to the front of the restaurant and I let go of her hand to open the door. It feels empty immediately, like I've just lost my option of survival on a desert island.

As Tessa and I walk in, a pleasant temperature created by the air conditioning greets us. I feel proud and I can't wait to show the place to her. It looks amazing, having been renovated completely only a year ago after I suggested it to Randy.

The restaurant is spacious, preferring room and space to breathe to cramped tables, which might seat more guests. It's homey and cozy, yet different. We tried to make guests feel welcome with the decor, and I think Randy did an amazing job.

I show Tessa the ropes, place where a hostess waits for the guests, how we number the tables, where we stock the extra cutlery. Finally, it's time to head into the kitchen.

I take her hand again on an impulse, feeling excited. I don't get to share this part of my life with a lot of people, and it'll feel so good to show it off to Tessa.

"Are you ready?" I ask her with a grin, my eyebrows raised. "It's a different world in there, just be prepared."

"I'm ready," she replies with a nervous smile, and I open the swinging doors that lead into my favorite place in the world.

The kitchen.

The magical place where new tastes are born, where I’m in the zone.

We're immediately greeted by loud noise and voices, the kitchen already bustling in preparation for the evening crowd.

I look at Tessa worriedly, fearing her reaction. She likes being by herself, and I'm afraid the bustling kitchen will be too much to handle.

Yet her eyes are filled with wonder as she looks around, and she’s smiling when she looks at me.

"This is amazing," she tells me honestly, and it makes me grin from ear-to-ear.

"Brought yourself a treat, did you, man?" a booming voice interrupts us, and Tessa and I look up at my sous chef, Alec.

"Hey, now," I say good-naturedly, slapping my friend on the back. "This is my stepsister, Tessa, so watch your mouth, big man."

"Oh, I'm so scared," Alec feigns fear, clutching a hand over his heart. "I could take you down in a second."

"I still think we need to put that to the test," I wink at him.

I look at Tessa, who has shrunk back a little. I give her an encouraging smile. I know Alec can be scary, being even taller than me and heavy-set. I don't want her to feel threatened, though.

"Tess, meet Alec - my best friend and second best in the kitchen," I introduce them.

"The last thing is up for debate." Alec winks at Tessa, taking her hand and giving her a kiss instead of the usual handshake. She giggles.

"I couldn't resist," Alec says dramatically.

"Alec is right under me in the kitchen," I explain to her.

"Not in the exciting way," he throws in as he walks over to a pan, stirring its contents. "Unfortunately I don't swing that way, though your stepbrother sure is a handsome beast."

Tessa is grinning as I show her around. I don't want to speak too soon, but it looks like she's enjoying herself.

I introduce her to some of the staff along the way, leaving one person in particular for last. Finally, we stop in front of Rebecca.

"And this is Rebecca, who is front of house," I explain with a smile, though my heart is racing. I need these two to get along.

Rebecca is my ex. She is my longest relationship, the only one that ended well enough for us to stay on friendly terms. Bex is drop dead gorgeous with hair dyed black, plenty of tattoos and milky, porcelain skin.

One look at Tessa tells me she's already intimidated, but Bex seems friendly enough. Raising an eyebrow, she sticks a hand out for my stepsister to shake.

"Pleased to meet you," she says. So the claws aren't out - yet.

Bex is kind of proprietary when it comes to me, and when she gets jealous, you don't want to be around her. I give her a warning look, hoping that's enough to make her stay off Tessa's back.

"Hello," Tessa replies in a small voice, shaking Rebecca's hand. Bex stares at her hard, and Tessa fidgets. I can tell she's uncomfortable and it's already driving me crazy.

"Tessa is my stepsister," I begin explaining. "She's going to be staying with me for a while and working with you, Bex."

"What can you do?" Rebecca asks, her eyebrows raised. She takes Tessa in, her eyes lingering on her pretty dress, the manicured hands. She snorts.

I hate her for that, for making Tessa feel inadequate. I purse my lips, knowing I'll give Bex a piece of my mind when the introductions are over.

"She'll be waitressing," I say. "And Tessa, Rebecca works as front of house, showing guests to their tables and making sure everything is okay. If you need anything, I'm sure she'll be happy to help you."

I give Bex a warning look, making her know it best be that way - or else.

"Can you not?" Bex rolls her eyes, then her expression changes in an instant. She gives Tessa an encouraging look and my stepsister's face immediately lights up. "I'll show little Tess here a great time. Now scoot, Adam, we have work to do."

She gives me a look which I know means I better get lost, so I laugh, raising my hands in the air. I wink at Tessa, who looks a little lost, but I'm sure Bex can handle it.

As for me, I head back to Alec and start preparing the day's menu. We have a lot of work ahead of us.

The day is long and arduous, as most are in the kitchen, but I fucking love it. This is where I feel at home, where I'm in the zone. I shout orders make sure every damn dish is perfect. I'm a beast in the kitchen, but I'm proud of my food. I know I'm the best at my job, and my subordinates better be, too.

I only catch glimpses of Tessa throughout the evening. I can see she's just as busy as the rest of us - it's a full house as per usual, and she's running around, having directions screamed at her most of the time.

I don't see her break down, not once. She takes everything with a nod and a wince at most, doing exactly as she is told. She's wearing the waitress uniform, too - a tight black pencil skirt, white blouse and apron along with a bow tie.

She looks amazing - but then again, when doesn't she? I have to stop myself from staring at Tess when I almost chop off a finger, so I make myself focus on the food. There will be plenty of time to stare at my stepsister later on.

Finally, the day comes to an end. It's a late night and I'm exhausted but happy by the time the restaurant closes. Congratulating my team on a job well done, I go in search of Tessa. It's time to go home.

I can't find her for the life of me, finally stumbling on Bex in the personal area. She's getting changed, not even bothering to hide the fact that her top half is completely naked as she faces me.

"Enjoying the view?" she asks me with a wink, her breasts on full display.

"Been there, done that, darling," I reply with a wide smile and she sticks her tongue out at me.

I walk closer to her, her scent almost overwhelming. It's a comforting one - spices and cloves mixed with vanilla. I always did like it... but I'm not about to be suckered into her games again.

"Where is Tessa?" I ask Rebecca.

She shrugs, facing me with her hands on her hips. Her breasts are jutting out, the nipples already hard. I know Bex still has a thing for me, but I've never acknowledged it. Best to pretend there's nothing there, and not give her false hope.

"I wouldn't know," she says. "She had a few disasters today, by the way. Wrong food on the table, even tripped once, spilled a guest with some wine... I would advise against her working in here, if you want to keep your reputation stellar."

My eyes narrow at this new information. I hate the way she's talking about Tessa, and I'm not having any of it.

I step closer to Bex and she shrinks back. I reach forward, touching her breast with my hand, taking her nipple between my fingers. 

"I'll do what I fucking want, Bex," I say calmly, and she is already panting with the force of my touch against her naked skin. "That includes letting Tessa work her, if it damn well pleases me. And as for you..." Gently, I twist her nipple and she gasps with pleasure. Bex was always a pain slut, and I know damn well she's getting off on this.

"You'll treat Tessa nicely. You'll be polite, friendly, and welcoming, or else. Do you understand, Bex?"

I toy with her nipple, flicking it back and forth. It's not like I'm not enjoying this, either, my cock already standing to attention in my trousers. Bex is panting, her mouth shaped in an O as her eyes beg me not to stop.

"Yes," she agrees with a vigorous nod, her eyes already glazed over with the need for more. "I'll do whatever you say... Don't stop, please."

But I do, releasing her skin as she gasps for more. "We're done with that, Bex," I say with a smile. "This is just to remind you, I'm boss in this kitchen. You don't get a fucking say."

She blushes a violent red and I turn around to leave. I'm about to walk away when I see something in the door - a figure in the shadows. Long brown hair, her lips twisted in pain. Tessa.

"Fuck," I mutter as she scurries away, and I already know I fucked up.

***

I can't find Tessa anywhere, cursing my stupidity as I search for her. She saw me with Bex, and it must have given her the wrong impression. I want to slap myself as I get ready to leave, changing from my work clothes to something more comfortable and finally heading outside into the parking lot.

A small figure immediately catches my eye as I go outside - Tessa. She's standing by my bike, her arms hugging her body as she stares hard into the ground. A repeat scene from this morning.

I approach her in a few long steps, my gaze filled with concern as I take her in.

"Are you okay?" I ask, trying to keep my voice strong when all I want to do is grovel for her forgiveness. I don't even know why, I've done nothing wrong, but I've hurt her, and that's reason enough to apologize.

She gives a small nod, her eyes glued to the concrete. 

I walk closer to her and can feel her breath catch in her throat as I reach out. My fingers find her chin, gently tipping her head back until she's forced to look at me.

Tessa's eyes are red-rimmed and swollen, her bottom lip gently trembling as she looks at me. She's breaking. This morning was just the tip of the iceberg, but she's going to fall apart if I don’t help her.

"Do you want to go home?" I ask her softly, and she immediately nods. "Let's go, then."

We get on the bike, and I have to help Tessa every step of the day. I wrap her hands around my hips and they rest limply along my jacket. I drive her home then, making sure to step on the gas and get there as soon as possible.

When I pull up in front of house, I help Tessa get off. She's so fragile, almost limp in my arms, like she's going to fall to pieces on the spot. I'm so fucking worried, ridden with guilt for not helping my stepsister sooner.

I help her walk inside. Tess almost falls over at some point, which is when I've finally had enough. I scoop her into my arms, holding her close to me. She doesn't resist, instead curling into my embrace, her head resting against my shoulder.

I can't fucking help myself, and I kiss her forehead tenderly. I want to make her better, want to convince her it'll be okay. I can't stand the pain radiating from her body.

"Sweet Tessa," I say softly as I carry her inside. She mumbles something against my skin and I wonder if she can feel the heat radiating off me, the way my flesh begs to be kissed by those full lips of her.

I take her upstairs, safely enclosed in my arms. I open the door to her room with my foot and safely deposit her on the bed. She curls up into a small ball, her eyes empty and glazed over. I sit down next to her, my hands stroking her silken hair as she breathes, deep, arduous breaths.

"Tell me what happened, doll," I ask her, my voice soft, but begging her to let me in. I need to help her, but it's fucking impossible if she keeps shutting me out like this. "Did someone give you a hard time?"

She shakes her head no, the motion weak. I stroke her hair and she snuggles against my hand.

"Why were you with her?" she asks in small voice.

"Bex?" I ask her, furrowing my brows. Tessa nods and guilt fills me up, knowing she saw the scene in the changing room. "I wanted to make sure she wasn't giving you a hard time. She can be bitchy, has driven away more than one waitress because she was jealous."

"Why would she be jealous of me?" Tessa asks, her wide eyes wondering.

I give her an incredulous look. Tessa is stunning, a real beauty even with her weight loss. Bex doesn't hold a candle to her; she's nothing in comparison.

And realizing that, albeit silently, makes me anxious. I shouldn't. Goddamn it, I can’t let myself have these thoughts about my stepsister. Tessa is family, and that's the way it should be... But it's getting increasingly hard to fight the growing attraction for her, the deep, true feelings that never really went away, not since I met her when she was just a teenager.

"Don't worry about that," I say softly. "Bex and I... we used to date, but that's a chapter I closed long ago."

Her eyes grow hopeful as she looks into mine, and it's breaking me. My hand aches with the deep need to touch her, hold Tessa in my arms like I've always longed to. It's where she belongs.

“Tess.” I manage to get the words out, my throat dry and raspy as she looks at me sleepily. “I’m sorry you saw that. I know it doesn’t matter to you.”

She flinches at the words, and I think we both know, somewhere deep, deep down she does care, she always has. She does have feelings for me… Feelings neither of us can ever act on.

I swallow hard at the lump in my throat, still wanting to console Tessa and make her feel at least a bit better.

“But there really is nothing between me and Bex. I shouldn’t have touched her, it gave her the wrong idea.” And you, too, I silently add in my mind, but I’m too much of a wuss to say it out loud.

Tessa’s eyes grow hopeful, a smile lightens up her face. I hate myself for giving her hope because I know she’ll never be mine, not the way we both need her to be.

So I give her a kiss on the cheek and I try not to linger… But as soon as my mouth hits her velvety skin, I’m a goner. Her skin is hot under my lips, burning up with some feeling I’m desperate to name. Tess’s eyes flutter open and we look at each other. Burning need consumes my body, the flames scorching my skin.

I’m the one that moves away, and as soon as I’m a few inches farther, Tessa lets out a labored breath. I don’t look at her, can’t stand to gaze upon her perfect features. A girl that can never be mine.

“Good night, sweet Tessa,” I groan and head for the door.

I’m not sure whether the soft way my name escapes her lips is part of my imagination, or if she really did call me back into the guest room.

Shutting the door, I decide it’s best if I don’t know. Because Tessa Silver is as forbidden as they get, and tonight, I’m more desperate than ever in my need to break the rules.