Balance Of The Worlds (17 page)

When she next opened her eyes it was peaceful and someone was holding her.
The burn she’d felt from the Dark Sorcerer was gone, replaced with a soothing breeze. And the arms around her were warm and loving.

It wasn’t Lothonos, but she could sense his soul nearby. Waiting. For her.

“He loves you, darling. He just does not show it well.” The voice was warm and melodious, and even after five thousand years so achingly familiar.

The scent was the same, as well.

Nelciana looked into the face of her mother. “Mama? Am I…dead?”

“Yes. For the moment.”

The eyes were the same as before, but while Nelci could touch her mother, Nevva didn’t feel completely corporeal, either. “Where exactly am I?”

“This is the
in between
, Nelciana. Phaenna’s home. It is still her home, regardless of what the Fates have told her.”

There were no architectural features, no ground beneath her feet. Nelciana couldn’t even distinguish what colors surrounded them. But there was light from somewhere, and warmth.

And if she wasn’t mistaken, the scent of Gaian vanilla.

“You know her?”

“We’ve met before. She helped my soul transition after my death.”

The Laquazzeana hadn’t told her that. Nelciana wondered why. “I see.”

“No, I don’t suppose you do.” Her mother laughed and the sound had Nelciana’s heart squeezing with both longing and joy. She had missed her mother so much… “Your children are so beautiful, Nelciana. You are blessed.”

Pain hit her chest swiftly at the reminder of her babes. She couldn’t be dead, couldn’t leave them without her. Not yet. They were far too young for that.

“Do not fret, darling. Whatever choice you make at this moment, your babes are safe. And they will be until it is time for them to meet their own paths. The Fates will be quite kind to your children.”

Nevva smiled. Her arms tightened around Nelciana. “I would have loved to be with them as they grow, but that is not my path.”

“Why? Why did the Haliophux do this? I will not ever understand.”

“Pain. He was hurt and angered, and it made his soul twist with bitterness. Over time he viewed all with great magic as a threat. Ones to be consumed.”

“And he wanted yours?”

“He wanted me, yes. For a while. His bitterness did not stop him from lusting. When I refused, his rage was released upon our world. For that I will always be truly sorry. I should have realized…But what happened was the will of the Fates. We must console ourselves with that.”

“What is my role now? What am I supposed to do
here
?”

“My darling, you are not supposed to be here.” Her mother kissed her forehead, and a rush of warmth and pain and something Nelciana could not identify flooded into her body. “Your choice to attack the sorcerer to protect others, even though you knew you would be injured, was sacrifice enough after all you have been through. You are not supposed to be here, darling. You are changed. Remember always that I love you.”

Nelciana fell again. The burn returned. “Mama!”

“Go darling. Trust. Trust with your heart.”

Everything spun around her.

He wasn’t about to let her go. Lothonos knew that. Strong hands tried to pull her from his arms, but he fought. He did not recognize the males in front of him, and he wasn’t certain his arms would cooperate even if he wanted them to.

She barely breathed.

Nothing had ever terrified him more.

“Move!” A small woman shoved her way through the crowd of healers. He had seen her before, he thought, and at the sight of her he relaxed slightly.

She was Laquazzeana—and leader of this healer city.

“Lothonos, bring her in here. We will have privacy for what it is that must be done.” The healer girl Bronwen was completely blind, but she moved with purpose and a confidence that betold her skills. She was legendary, and the best there was.

“I don’t know what he did to her. I don’t know how bad her burns…” Lothonos couldn’t finish, the emotions welling in him prevented speech.

“We will do what we can. I can promise you this. But you have to give us some room, ok?” She began slicing the burned clothing from Nelciana’s body, throwing it to a lesser healer nearby. “We need to get every bit of clothing his fires might have touched off of her skin before it sinks in.”

“It wasn’t his fires. It was hers.”

The healer paused, then resumed her task. “Nonetheless, he touched her. You can still feel him on her skin. We need to get rid of that.”

He did not think what they could do would be enough. “What has happened here?”

“Twenty thousand Nellanas and Dardaptoans marched on the city,” the healer said.

“Why?” He didn’t care. All that mattered to him lay silently on the mattress.

“They were waiting…for
her.”

It wasn’t the girl healer, but Eaudne’s son. The dark one, for which Dekimos City had been named. “Why?”

“Because
she
is the Nellana queen. And it is her destiny to lead them.”

***

The healers washed her and examined every inch of her body. They applied salves to the burns that marred parts of her flesh. Lothonos sat on the foot of the bed and touched her. Calmed her when she thrashed over the blankets. Did she know he was there?

She fought, and at one point there was talk of restraining her to keep her from falling and injuring herself further.

He wouldn’t have it. He lifted her into his arms and held her.

One night turned into two.

He never let her go.

Hard hands wrapped around her and Nelciana struggled to breathe. Where was she?

“Do not dare die.”

It was in such an ancient language, archaic even for Evelanedean, that she almost misunderstood what he said. “I won’t.”

“If you die, we
both
do. As do the
worlds
if I am not there to stop him.”

“Who are you?” Darkness surrounded them both as they fell through whatever void surrounded them.

“I am Raijlun, brother of the sorcerer.”

“The man with Estacles?” She had heard someone mention his name. Estacles had often called out the name, from what Eaudne had said. Everyone had assumed it was the male in the room next to his.

“Do not worry of that now. We must find our way to the surface of your soul. Or you will be lost and
you
are not supposed to be. You still have a destiny to fulfill. As do the rest of your sons and daughters.”

“I am dead, aren’t I?”

“Not yet. You are…somewhere in between.” His hands were strong on her, and it made her question. She had seen the shell of his body. It was not one to inspire confidence…or trust. “Come! People are waiting for you. Worrying for you. Do not take them for granted.”

“But where are we? And why are you here?”

“We are in a world that some know of. Your Phaenna, perhaps. The queen, of course, and others…it is
in between
, and none has named it yet. It is a safe place, where we Laquazzeana can go to heal. And have for eons. It is far more ancient than any of the elders can know.”

“But I am not Laquazzeana.”

“Now you are.” His hands were on her chest, over her breasts and her heart. But there was nothing sexual in his touch.

He shoved her, hard. Nelciana screamed as she landed somewhere solid.

“Go! Do what must be done. Think not of the future or of the past. Think only of the moment, until the time is there to defeat him for always. It will be not in the past, not in the future, and not in the present. But it will be in the eternity! Go. For he will come for your blood, your children’s and the queen’s. For all who carry even a drop of the Nellana or Dardaptos blood will call to him. And I am not yet strong enough to stop him. Hold him off until I am.”

And then he was gone. Just gone so quickly she almost thought she’d imagined him. Except the area over her left breast, which still burned from the pressure of his touch.

She closed her eyes and tried to catch her breath. It didn’t happen quickly. When she opened her eyes she was surrounded by another warm light.

And the echo of her mother’s soul was completely gone.

Had they traveled through another barrier of the realms?

There was grass beneath her feet, and the air was redolent with the scent of wildflowers.

The sky was closer to green than the blue of Gaia or the lavender of Levia. She lay on the grass for a moment and tried to think.

She wasn’t dead. At least, she didn’t feel like she was.

Nelciana pushed to her feet. Her
vestis
and
pardus
were still bloodied from the battle. Her cloak was singed. That much hadn’t changed at least. Not that she had expected it to. Maybe she had hit her head and was still unconscious? Maybe her mother and Raijlun had been nothing more than dreams?

Ways of taunting her with things she did not dare understand?

“Why do you always doubt?”

Someone laughed behind her.

Nelciana’s hand went straight to the staff that she somehow carried again.

“Yeah, nifty little place this. I think I’ve been here about eighty times before. Tell me something, Nelci…I’m not dead again, am I?” Loren looked around for a moment, apprehension on her face. “I don’t think I am, but who knows? I’ve certainly been here enough times to wonder.”

“Is this even real?”

“I think it is, but what do I know? I didn’t even know I was cursed and not dead for five thousand years. Talk about clueless.” Loren reached out and took Nelciana’s hands in her own. “But this feels right.”

“I saw our mother.” Could her sister understand her confusion?

“I feel her sometimes.”

“I wouldn’t let myself. It hurt too much to lose her. All of you.” Every one of them had been so precious to her.

“I know.” They walked together, toward where Nelciana did not know where. “The first three lives I ached for those that I didn’t know. Once I realized who I was, each time, I would console myself with the knowledge that you lived. It helped. So many times I wanted to find you.”

“But you never did.”

“The Fates always stopped me.” Loren stopped walking, forcing Nelciana to as well. “The Fates have guided me five thousand years. And it brought me here,
now
. Since the barriers came down I have wondered if that had been a mistake. If they kept us separated for their own reasons. But I am here now, and they brought me here. To Jushua. To you. To the other Laquazzeana. There is a purpose in that. Just as there is a purpose in you being here, as well. We cannot ever think differently. I love you, sister. And I have always. We’re here.”

Where was here, though? And how did she get back to where she came from?

“Loren?” When she turned around again, her sister was gone.

And there was another woman walking toward her.

Eaudne. A light surrounded her, and she walked more upright than she had before. She was dressed in a tunic laced with gold and something else. Something ceremonial? It was a completely unadorned garment, but…something told Nelciana it was important.

And hadn’t Loren wore a similar outfit, if in a different color? “Aunt? What is going on?”

“Come. I know you are confused. And I think we all were when it happened to us.” Eaudne smiled. “I know you have questions, and I know there is much that you do not understand.”

“I died, didn’t I?” At least, that was something she understood. Dead was dead—unless you became a Laquazzeana, that was.

“Yes, when…that male…when he touched you, he marked your soul. His mark was strong enough to pull your soul from wherever it was, and back into your body. Your body rests now, until its injuries are healed.”

“I do not truly know what that means. I know of the others, yet…no one speaks of what it
means
.” And she wasn’t certain she believed any of this was real, either. Maybe it was a dream, or a coma, or some other sort of state? “Who was that male?”

“He is Raijlun. And I have heard of him. He was said to be a mythical being.”

“Twin to the Dark Sorcerer.”

“Yes. I do believe so. Unless he
is
the sorcerer, claiming to be his brother. But Estacles does not seem to think so. My son…he is comforted by the other male, even still.”

“How?” She thought the two males were still in the halls of Thrun, being cared for by Cassandra and Nalik.

“I do not know. Something…has bound their souls together for now. It is too uncertain to try and force them apart now. So… we wait.”

Nelciana understood the mother’s fear in the other woman’s eyes. “Why am I here? I don’t want…”

“You are here because it is where your actions have guided you, child.” Eaudne touched her cheek. “Quit with the doubt, and know that all of us have a purpose. The Dark Sorcerer altered so many of our futures, but this is a reality for us now.”

“What am I supposed to do? I do not even know what a Laquazzeana truly is. No one does.”

“Because it is not something one can just become. There has to be great pain or sorrow or sacrifice. Some of us are born to others, like Cass and Nalik’s young one. Still more find their way through the darkness of life. Like I did. Like your sister and Aureliana. Bronwen’s sacrifice. And even that isn’t always a guarantee, either. I do not know why it is this way. But there is a purpose.”

“I should not be here.”

“Nonsense. Five thousand years of grief and love for your family brought you to this place. Inside you’ll find more answers.”

The cottage rose from the ground before them when they crested over another hill. In this place Eaudne did not limp, but strode beautifully—regally—over the ground.

There were others waiting inside.

Loren, Nalik Black and his mate, Cass. Dekimos, looking pale and withdrawn. The blind healer Bronwen. She had met a few of them before.

But never like this. A small round table was in the center of the room. They looked so solemn, and those that could see her watched her every move

Nelciana stepped to the nearest empty seat. “What are we doing here?”

“It is customary, when one becomes a Laquazzeana to meet them in some way. For Aureliana it was Phaenna’s task,” Eaudne said. “For me, I do not remember who. I was aching so, and cannot remember. For Bronwen it was Phaenna, as well. For Cass it was Aureliana. For Loren, I suppose you will have to ask her someday. For you, it is all of us. Because
today
was the first time the dark so—Haliophux has attacked directly. Your soul needs a greater time to heal. And we wanted to be here.”

“I see—” She didn’t, but what else could she say? “Is Levia safe?”

“For now,” Nalik Black said. “You hurt him, with whatever you did. What fire you brought.”

“It wasn’t me. It was the sword. There was something in it. I think it had something to do with a residual fire from…that day.”

“It is possible. Whatever it was, it worked.”

“For now.” She would never forget the surprise in his soulless eyes when she’d drove her mother’s sword into his stomach. Where was that sword now? “My mother’s sword? Where did it go?”

“Your Lothonos has it. Near your bedside. He has not left you in all of this time,” Aureliana said. “He waits for you.”

“How long?”

“Three days,” Eaudne said. “He brought you to Dekimos immediately, and you have yet to awake. You are going to have to soon, you know.”

“Is this real?”

When she looked up all were gone—except for Loren and Eaudne. Even the small cottage had been replaced by that multicolored light from before. She walked between her sister and the woman who’d delivered her so many years ago.

“I still don’t know what happens next. If this is real. If I am alive or dead.” 

“And you won’t. Until you make the choice to accept it. You can go on, Nelciana. Leave this life and hope you can move on to the next. But it means never being with the family you have made now again. The choice is yours, darling. I think we both, as mothers, know what option you will choose. Your male waits for you…Go to him. Love him, and cherish him always.”