Battlefield (12 page)

 

She had to remain optimistic. Their morale would only stay intact if she did—right? Cadence wasn't necessarily sure how much she bought it, but she did believe in mind over matter. Things would be okay if she stuck to her guns. Alan's uncertainty and Orlando's stubbornness were starting to weigh against the mantra “everything will be okay”, but that was why she was so thankful for JD.

A small smile formed on her lips as she glanced over at him. The two had just gotten done eating some fast food, and now it was time to go their separate ways. Always the gentleman, he walked her up to her apartment door. She wasn't sure how to express how much it meant to her. He knew about the strange people lurking around her apartment complex though, and while most of them probably weren't dangerous, they still made her nervous.

Cadence had lived there for the five years she had known him. It wasn't considered a great area of town. There was a lot “trash” living there, depending on who was asked. The rich kids at Morningtide liked to whisper about her behind her back. They didn't realize there was nothing trashy about her home. For the most part, everyone was nice. They all had their own problems, and for the most part they stayed out of each others' business. On occasion, she had seen or heard things she wished she hadn't. Those were what prompted him to walk her back.

“Do you want me to pick you up tomorrow? I'm pretty sure I can get the car. Your mom is probably going to be working, right?” JD said as they stopped at her door. She pulled out her keys and started to search through them.

“Yeah, most likely. Thank you, it would beat having to take the bus out to Orlando's. You think this is a good idea right? Be honest.”

“Yes. I don't have to be home for awhile if you wanna talk.”

She snorted as she let him inside of her home. Her mom was still working, not like she'd care because she absolutely adored JD.

“Do you want to stay and listen to me talk, or are you just procrastinating on going home again?” Cadence asked with a laugh. She pulled off her shoes and her jacket and went to go and start some warm water.

“A little bit of both.” He also pulled off his shoes and then got comfortable on the couch, much like he always did. “What are you making?”

“Cocoa.”

“White chocolate?”

“I still have some.”

“Cool, make that.” He leaned back on the couch and he watched her every move. She could feel herself growing self-conscious. Something about his eyes always caused this reaction.

“I don't have much to talk about. I wanted your opinion. You seem to be the one who's the most into everything that's been going on,” she admitted as she stirred the mix into two mugs.

“I feel like I'm doing something. I don't get that much. You talk about how you have these things you think you're born to do. I feel kind of like that with this. Even if I'm not powerful, I know I've got something. I just have to find it.”

“But should we be getting involved?” She joined him on the couch.

JD shrugged, taking his mug and sipping its contents slowly. He closed his eyes and then sighed a little. “If we don't now, eventually we will. I mean, I don't know much about what's going on, but it sounds like it's going to get big fast. People are going missing. It's only a matter of time before something else happens right?”

She'd been thinking rather selfishly since the whole thing started, mostly about how her new powers were going to help her get places in life. She hadn't thought about the people who were getting hurt from all of this.

“Right, it's surreal,” she said after a drink.

“I don't like when you talk like that. That makes it surreal for me,” he mumbled into his cup.

“Sorry, I couldn't think of a better word, I guess.” She bit her lip, and it was quiet.

“I know, but it isn't like you. That's the one thing I don't like about this whole thing. Everyone is changing but me, and I'm the one being left behind.”

Briefly her dark eyes met his hazel ones. “I think you've changed though.”

“Really? Because I don't feel different.” His eyes sparkled a little.

“You are. You're not being left out. We wouldn't be able to do anything without you. You do realize that right?” She reached over and put a hand on his knee, giving it a gentle pat.

JD stared down at her hand, and she noticed his own hands twitch at his sides, like he was thinking about holding her hand; then he stared into empty space.

“I don't realize it. You don't get it though.”

Her hand moved up to grab his so she could squeeze it. “Then explain it to me? I want to know.”

When he didn't reply, she pressed a little deeper. “Please?” She would either break through, or he'd completely stonewall. Sometimes all it took was a little reassurance.

His body tensed up, and he pulled his hand away from hers so he could grab his cocoa mug, taking a drink and using both of his hands as a cradle. He looked from the cup to her and then once more back at the cup. “It's not important anyway.”

It is, she wanted to say, but bit her lower lip and nodded instead. “I trust you when you say that.”

Why isn't he talking to me?
She absolutely couldn't stand this awkward silence lingering between them now, nor did she understand why he was looking at her so strangely, like he didn't recognize her anymore.

“Try not to change too much. Can you promise me that at least? Because I don't know how much more of this I can take,” he said with a heavy sigh and put his now empty mug on the table.

I'm not changing at all. I'm still me.
“Yeah, I promise.” All he was asking her to do was try, right?

“You done talking? You say everything on your mind?”

“Yeah.” No. There were still a lot of things she wanted to tell him. She wouldn't of course. Now wasn't the time.

She wanted him to know what it all felt like and for him to understand how scared she was. Constantly she learned something new. Information popped into her head every second. Even now, each thought sparked a new association for her that produced new knowledge for her to process. It was like her brain was attached to a constant Internet search, like she was Google, and she had thousands upon thousands of pages to sift through.

She also hated how her logic was destroying her faith. Another thing he probably wouldn't understand, however, simply because JD couldn't possibly imagine what having no faith would be like. He was always so sure of everything and so easy to trust. She used to be the same way, and now the more she learned, the less she did.

Alan. She wanted to trust him and give him the benefit of the doubt, and part of her did believe he had the best intentions at heart. What bothered her though was how he kept things from them, and it was so obvious, too. Did he actually think they were dumb enough that they wouldn't be able to tell? Still, it wouldn't be a wise decision to confront him on it, not yet at least. She was willing to give him until the end of this mission to decide what to do about these doubts. After all, she also understood his military logic, too. There were things she and the others didn't need to know. Whether Alan was withholding the information due to orders or naivety was another story. He came across as being some kind of big, tough, all-powerful alien, but it was quite clear he was still a lot like them. This scared her most of all.

“Are you sure?” JD raised his eyebrows. “I know you're thinking about something. I can see your brain doing it. You also got quiet on me.”

She decided now would be a good time to clean up their dirty dishes. She didn't like lying to him. He'd pick up on it eventually.

“I'm a woman. I'm always thinking about something.” Hopefully he would buy it.

“And because you're a woman, I know that when you say no, you actually mean yes. Why do you do that by the way? It's frustrating and annoying.”

“Sometimes it's because we don't want to burden you with our melodrama.” She faltered a little when she noticed him frown.
Focus on the dishes.
“I mean, our problems?” Would he be okay with that? Did it sound more like something she would have said before her vocabulary expanded so greatly? “Either way, you know what I'm trying to say. Other times we're testing you. We want to see how well you're paying attention, and sometimes it's because we don't think you're going to ever understand it, so we say nothing because we want you to let it drop. You didn't hear that from me though. I think I just broke the girl code. I'd feel pretty special if I were you.”

“Oh yeah, I feel awesome. Thanks for the insight. So which one is it?” He stood, joining her in the kitchen. He had a tendency to follow her around the house if she was ever away from him for too long. For someone who grew up in a full house, he had a hard time with being alone. She'd certainly be begging for as much privacy as she could get.

“Which one is what?” She turned and found him rather close behind her. He stared over her shoulder and watched her. That was when she realized she'd been washing the same cup over and over again.

“Your reason for not telling me.”

“A little bit of columns A and C.”

“I guess I'm happy you're not testing me at least.”

“But?” She swallowed.

“I want to understand.”

She shut the sink off, dried her hands, and faced him again. Her hands shook a little, and then a lot when he grabbed them with his own.

“Cadence, tell me.” His eyes were wide and pleading.

“I'm scared.”

He laughed. “We're all scared.”

“If you're scared, if we're all scared, then this is a bad idea.”

“Or that means it's more important.”

That made no sense, and she was going to say as much, but stopped when the keys in the door turned. Mom was home. She pulled away and started to go back to cleaning.

“Hi, Mrs. Sinclair,” JD said.

“Hi,” her mom said, and went through her usual evening ritual of hanging up her purse and then jacket on the closet doorknob. “Work was slow so they sent me home early, especially since I'm pushing overtime for the week as it is. You kids up to anything fun tonight?”

“No,” JD said and left the kitchen.

Cadence finished the dishes and then joined them in the other room.

“I was thinking about watching a movie. I just picked a few new ones up. I got some popcorn, too. You're welcome to stay, JD, but you know you're always allowed to stay as long as you want to,” her mom said.

“I'd like to, but I should probably be getting home. I have a feeling I'll fall asleep, and then I'll end up missing my curfew. I kind of want to be able to use the car tomorrow night, so it'd probably be a good idea to not piss the parents off,” he said.

“Next time then.”

“I'll see you tomorrow,” Cadence said and walked him to the door. She tried to not be too obvious with how much she wanted him to leave, but it was also clear he wanted to go just as badly. He'd never worried about curfew in the past, and they both knew his parents wouldn't get mad if he was a little later than usual. There was nothing more to say though, so it all worked out. As soon as he was gone, she let out a quiet sigh of relief. She forgot her mom was still watching.

“Did something happen? Was I interrupting a moment?”

“No, we were just hanging out,” Cadence said. Sitting on the couch by her mother, she curled her legs in close to her body.

“Uh-huh.”

“We were.”

“Okay, but you seem tense, and that's not like you.”

“Maybe I'm just changing. Am I allowed to do that? Do I have to always be the same?” Cadence snapped.

“No, you can be different if you want to.” She spoke calmly, and Cadence instantly felt guilty.

“I'm sorry.”

“For what, honey?”

“Getting defensive, I guess. JD keeps getting on me about being different, and I'm tired of hearing about it. It's part of growing up. I'm not doing anything wrong.”

Mom rubbed a hand over her legs. “No, you're not. Sometimes it's hard for other people to accept when their friends do change because they just don't like what the person is changing into, or they're afraid you're going to grow apart.”

The metaphorical light bulb turned on
. So that's his problem.
“I don't think I could get rid of JD even if I did want to. It would be too weird.”

“Is school stressing you out again?” Her mom gave a small smile. Cadence wanted to always be cool and collected like her. The woman had gone through so much, and it was like she never batted an eye.

For the first time in a long time, she lied to her mother. School was not a problem anymore. “Kind of. I have a lot of homework this weekend.”

Her mom nodded. “Okay, well, tomorrow I am going to take you out for a little shopping spree, and before you fight me on it and try to tell me all the reasons you don't need to, I'm going to tell you why you do. I have money because I got a bonus, and I want to spend it on you. I'm not talking about jewelry or a five-hundred-dollar dress, but lunch at some place that isn't fast food and a decently priced treat or two will happen whether you like it or not.”

“I guess I could indulge you.” Her mom gave her the same strange look JD had given her earlier. “What?”

“I'm happy your studying is starting to sink in. I'm proud of you, honey. You've obviously been working hard. All the more reason for a reward.”

“Thanks, Mom. I'll start the popcorn if you want to put the movie in?” She was proud of herself, too. She was finally living up to the high bar placed over her. She hoped her Dad knew and was proud, too.

Cadence got back up, feeling a little better. Her mom always knew what to do.

In the kitchen, she pulled out her cellphone and texted JD.
“You'll always be my best friend.”