Beautifully Destroyed (4 page)

Chapter Seven

Toria

              “Toria? Why are you sleeping on the porch?”

Vanessa woke me from a dead sleep. I opened my eyes and noticed the sun was coming up. Last night, I was having problems getting to sleep. The couch was really comfortable, but I was so used to sleeping outside that I couldn’t fall asleep. So I decided to sleep on the porch.

I sat up and felt embarrassed. “Vanessa, you have to understand that I am so used to sleeping outside. I couldn’t fall asleep, so I brought this stuff out here.” 

She sighed and helped me grab the pillow and blanket. “Well, please don’t sleep out here again. I can give you some chamomile tea to help you sleep at night if you need it.”

What I needed was to double up on the oxy to help me sleep. “Thank you.”

“Okay well, would you like pancakes or waffles for breakfast? Oh, do you like tea or coffee?” She just rambled on for about five minutes. When she was done talking, I finally answered her.

“I would love pancakes and coffee, please.”

“You got it.”

I helped her get breakfast ready. We sat at the little table that was big enough for two people. I started to eat and I let out a moan.

“These are fantastic. It’s been so long since I had pancakes.”

“Can I ask you something? You don’t have to answer; I was just curious.”

“Yes.” I suddenly became nervous.             

“How did you become homeless?”

I closed my eyes. “When I was seventeen, I went to a party. I met a guy who came off smooth and hot. Well, he offered me a pill, a prescription drug. I was hesitant at first, but then I thought you only live once. So I took it, I took the poison that now consumes my life. The high was the best feeling ever, even though I know it’s destroying me. But I can’t stop, I need it to live. Well, my parents found out, and they said I was ruining my life and they didn’t want to see me live like that. So they kicked me out.”

I looked at Vanessa, and she had tears in her eyes. “Are you still addicted?”

“I won’t lie to you; yes, I am. I am also addicted to Oxy. It helps me sleep at night.”

She sighed. “Would you consider getting help?”

“Maybe one day, but right now, this is my life. I can’t breathe without it. There was a time where I couldn’t get any. The withdrawals were horrible; it felt as if I was dying. I need to be high. I just have to be high.”

She took my hand. “I am here for you, and I will not judge you. But when that day comes when you want help, don’t hesitate. I am here for you.”

I smiled at her. “You, missy, are too kind. Thank you.”

After we had finished eating, we watched a couple movies and she showed me around. I found out she was a huge reader with a large selection of books. She told me I could read any of her books, which made me excited. I hadn’t read in so long. I picked out a book called
Until Death Do I Part
by
Genevieve Scholl.
I had never heard of her before, but I liked the sound of the book so I began to read it. The story was so sad. The main character found out she had stage four breast cancer. I wanted to finish it, but I had to get ready for the interview. I got up, and Vanessa helped me pick out an outfit. We decided on a blue sundress with a pair of black flats. The good thing was we were the same size, which made it perfect. She helped me curl my hair, and when she was done, I looked in the mirror. I looked like a totally different person. I decided I wanted to keep my hair long.

“Thank you for doing this for me.”

“Not a problem. Oh, and wait until you see Mr. Turner. Wow, he is a God.”

I laughed. “A God?”

“Yep, he is so swoon-worthy, and hot. Sad thing is he’s engaged… to a bitch.”

“Well, good thing I am not looking for a date.”

“HA! Yeah I agree. Are you ready?”

We left, and the drive to the hotel was so peaceful. I found out she was a huge pop fan. She was listening to the new
Taylor Swift
CD. I really loved the song
Blank Space.
We pulled up to the hotel and my mouth dropped.

“I really hope I am good enough.”

“You will be. I will sit outside the door in case you need me.”

“Thank you.”

We rode the elevator up in silence. We got off and walked toward Mr. Turner’s door. I knocked and looked back at Vanessa. She gave me a thumbs-up and smiled.

“Come in.”

I slowly opened the door, and when I walked in, he was standing at the window looking out at the city. When he turned around, I was stunned. It was him. It was the guy from the other day. Great, he knew I was homeless.
There goes my chances of ever getting this job
, I thought. I started to back away, but stopped when he spoke.

“Hello. Please come in and have a seat.”

Chapter Eight

Jeb

              Holy shit. This can’t be true. No, this is not happening to me.

My mystery girl was standing right in front of me, and she was beautiful. Her long chocolate hair was cascading down her back and over her shoulders in waves, and the dress she was wearing made her small curves really stand out. I watched as she took a seat in the chair. She looked really nervous and scared. 

I walked toward her and held out my hand. “Hello. I am Jeb Turner, the owner of this establishment. Can you please tell me your name?”

I could practically hear her heart beating in her chest, and I could see her breathing was elevated. “I’m… I’m Toria Jacobs.”

“So tell me why you want this job,” I said as I moved back behind my desk.

“Well, you know by now I am homeless. Well, except last night Vanessa let me stay at her house. I am sorry if I am wasting your time.”

I cut her off. “You are not wasting my time.”

“I will understand if you don’t hire me. I have no job experience. I am only twenty years old. But I am dependable, and I really need this job, Mr. Turner.”

I sat back in my chair and looked at her. Her lips looked dry and cracked, probably because she was dehydrated. She looked really sad, and I really wanted to get to know her—to know her story. Something was off about this girl. She seemed on edge, and she couldn’t sit still. I’d seen plenty of nervous people, but no one like that.

“So, can you start on Monday? I will be unavailable this weekend, and I will like to be the one that walks you through the building.”

Her eyes got big and a smile crept across her face. “Really? You are going to give me the job?”

“Yep. I need you to fill out this paperwork.” I got up and walked toward her with a stack of paperwork.

“Um, Mr. Turner.”

“Please, call me Jeb.”

“Okay Jeb, I have no home or ID.”

“Just fill out as much as you can, and on Monday come in at one and I will help you with the rest.”

“I hope I am not a burden.”

“No, you’re not.”

My arm brushed up against her and I got goose bumps, and not in a bad way. I had the urge to put her on the desk and fuck her. I shook my head to get that image out of my head. I didn’t want to scare her away when I just found her. There was a knock at the door, and Sean walked in.

“Oh, dude, I am sorry. I didn’t know you had someone in here. Wait a second, do I know you?”

Toria looked up, and then put her head down back down quickly. “Mr. Turner, I will see you Monday.”

She got up and bolted for the door. I looked after her and then looked back to Sean. He was watching her. How did her know her? I was curious.

“Oh oh, no way. I thought I knew that girl. Don’t tell me that she works here.”

“Why? As a matter of fact, I just hired her.”

He started to laugh. “Wow, dude, you’re a brave soul. Is her name… hold on, let me think… Toria?”

I was wondering what the hell was going on. “Yes.”

“No, man, you need to fire whoria Toria. That was her name when I knew her. I heard she was homeless and is a crack whore.”

I walked over to the window and looked down. I saw her walking with Vanessa, and she had her head hung. Now I was wondering if I made a mistake hiring her. I knew part of what Sean was telling me was true. I knew she was homeless, but a crack whore?

“Sean, how do you know her?”

Sean sat in the chair and he sighed. “I met her at a party my sister was at. She was going around offering people drugs. She was high out of her mind. Then she tried to suck my dick in the middle of the party. I was not letting that mouth near my junk.”

I still couldn’t believe what I was hearing. My heart was literally breaking. Maybe what I was hearing was a lie.

“Are you even listening to me?”

“Oh, yeah, sorry, just taking this all in.”

“Don’t let the little slut get to you. You have that hot piece of ass at home.”

I laughed. “Speaking of her, I have some shit to tell you.”

I told him that I was basically getting forced to married Barb so my dad could get a shit ton of money from a business deal. I told him that once the contract was signed, I was going to let her go. He told me Maddie’s sister was single, but my mind was on one girl and one girl only. Toria. Something about her just had me on edge. I just needed to know her story. I needed to know that what Sean had told me was a lie. I just had to know.

We finally left and went out. I just needed a guy night out to get my mind off women, period.

Chapter Nine

Toria

             
After Vanessa and I left the hotel, we drove to her house in silence. I told her I had a headache and wanted to lie down. She said she would help me with the paperwork after I got a nap. I started to shake, and I knew what that meant. I needed an
Adderall
. My forehead started to form sweat beads, and all I wanted was for her to speed. Once we got to her house, I went into the bathroom and took two pills out of my pants packet and swallowed them whole. I stuck my mouth under the faucet to get some water. I started to shake, so I sat on the side of the bath tub. I needed the pill to work soon.

Vanessa knocked on the door. “Toria?”

“I’m coming out, sorry.” I got up and looked at myself in the mirror. I could feel the pills kicking in, and I started to feel better. I walked out of the bathroom. “I just felt sick and needed a moment.”

“Okie dokie. Well, Mitch called and he said he was going to bring you some medication. I’m worried about you.”

“You don’t have to worry.”

I started to walk toward the couch.

She sat down next to me. “Do you need to take it every day?”

I sighed. “Yes, I do. If I don’t, its bad.”

“Well, I really don’t want to talk about this, because I don’t think you will listen to me about getting help.”

“I promise, one day I will.”

I got up and helped Vanessa in the kitchen. I decided to scrub her floors and counters. I noticed that she was just staring at me. “Sorry. When I take the pills, they make me hyper and I feel the urge to clean.”

“Okay. Well, I am going to go read if that’s okay.”

“Yep. It’s cool.”

I ended up cleaning her bathroom as well. Mitch came over and we decided to go for a walk.

“Hey, girl. So how’s it going?”

“Going great. I got a job.”

“I heard. Hey, listen: I brought you out here for a reason. Tony wants me to stop using. So I am going to get help and stop.”

“What? What about me?”

He stopped and looked at me. “Toria, I want you to get help also.”

“I don’t want help. I just want the pills.”

“Well, you won’t be getting them from me.”

I could feel the tears forming in my eyes and the panic rose in my chest. “What am I going to do?”

“Get help, or you will lose everything. Including me.”

“Why are doing this to me?”

“Tony and I are in love and he wants me healthy. I know it will be rough, but I need this.”

“So you are just going to abandon me?”

He took my hand. “No, but we can’t live like this. It’s time for us to get better and move on. Just think about this, think about your life. Do you really want to pop pills for the rest of your life?”

“I don’t know. Yes. No. Maybe.”

“Well, until you decide, I need a break from you so I can get better.”

I watched him walk away.
What am I going to do now?
How will I survive without Mitch? Better yet how will I survive without the drugs?
I didn’t have some for three days once and I thought I was dying. It felt as if I couldn’t move. I can’t. No, I won’t go through that again. I will just have to find a dealer myself. I held my head high and walked back toward the house. When I got back, I noticed that Tony’s car was gone.

“Hey girl, I thought I was going to have to come find you.”

I laughed and went to sit on the couch. “So what do you want to do?”

“Well, I have to work tomorrow night and there is a little dance club downtown.” Vanessa looked at her watch. “And if we get ready now we can go there for dinner and dancing.”

I got really excited.

“Oh wow, really? I would love that.”

We got up and went to her closet. She found a black velvet dress for me to wear. It was just above my knees, and she let me borrow a pair of red heels to go with it. I went to fix up my hair and make-up, and we were out the door within an hour. In the car, I listened to her sing. It took about thirty minutes to arrive at our destination. I looked over at the two story building called
The Grinding.
People were dressed up—some looked like sluts, but I told myself not to judge. We got out and walked toward the door. I stopped.

“What’s up?”

“I don’t have an ID, and I am not twenty-one.”

“Oh, they will let you in. Just act cool and they will wave you in. I come here a lot with Tony, so they know me.”

She was right; we got in with no problem at all. Once in, I could see the people dancing to the music. Some were rubbing up on each other. It looked like they are going to have sex on the dance floor. We found a table in the corner and we went to sit.

“Are you hungry?”

My stomach growled. I was not used to eating more than once a day. “Actually, I am.”

“Good, order anything.”

The pink haired waitress came over, and Vanessa ordered us both a cosmopolitan, and the waitress didn’t even check our IDs. I ordered a double Swiss and mushroom cheeseburger with some fries.

“I guess you were hungry.”

“My stomach was yelling at me. ‘Bitch, feed me!’”

Vanessa laughed out loud.

I smiled, glad I still had a sense of humor at least. “So do you have a boyfriend?”

She shrugged and sighed. “No, I’m single. I work too many hours to have time for a personal life.”

“Well, we are going to have to change that.”

“I don’t think I am pretty enough.”

“WHAT?!?!” She looked at me in shock. “Vanessa, you’re gorgeous, and that blond guy over at the next table has been mind fucking you for the past fifteen minutes.”

She smiled. “Really?”

“Yep, now go ask him to dance.”

“I will after some liquid courage.”

We laughed.

The food and drinks arrived and I ate my burger, savoring the juices and grease. I sipped on my cosmopolitan, and I was in heaven. I watched Vanessa get up and ask that guy to dance. As I watched them dance, a figure stepped in my sight. I looked up to see it was the guy from the office today. I started to panic.

“Whoria Toria. Thought you might have died. You know, being homeless and all.”

I felt embarrassed. Then I remembered his name… Sean. He was the asshole that got me hooked on drugs. “What do you want? And I am no whore.”

“Like anyone would believe you.”

“You’re just mad I denied you that last day I saw you.”

“Ha! You wish. Now listen, don’t show up on Monday. Leave town. Better yet, go OD on your drugs.”

“Is this all because I didn’t fuck you?”

“Bitch, you’re nothing but a crack whore, and I will make sure everyone knows. Oh, and have a nice night.” He smiled at me and walked away.

Tears formed in my eyes and I looked away. He was going to make my life a living hell, just as he did all those years ago.

Driving around with Sean was fun and dangerous. We had been hanging out a lot since the party. I started by taking the pills on the weekend, and staying up all night, but progressed to taking the pills every day. My grades were slipping and I was skipping school. My boyfriend broke up with me, and Kaylyn and I stop hanging out with each other. But I remembered that night with Sean before he started calling me Whoria Toria.

We were at his apartment and we started to fool around, until he started to get on top of me. “Sean, no.”

“Oh come on, you gave me a blow job last week.”

“Yes, I know, but I feel bad about that. I am not ready for sex.”

He got off me and started to pace the floor. “So you just led me on, making it like you were going to fuck me. Bitch, I get you high every day.”

Tears streamed down my face. “Sean, I wasn’t leading you on.”

“Yes, you were. All you are is a tease who is a junkie now.”

I got up and slapped him across the face.

“You bitch.” He pushed me into the wall. “Wait until I tell everyone about how much of a whore junkie you are. Now get the hell out of my house and never call me again.”

I grabbed my stuff and ran out of the house. I was about four miles away from home and it was late. I would have called Kaylyn, but she wouldn’t come get me. It was starting to get cold, so I walked a little faster. My phone vibrated in my pocket and I pulled it out. It was from Kaylyn.

Wow, I suspected you were a drug addict, but selling your body too? No wonder you got the name Whoria Toria.

I blinked and Vanessa was standing in front of me. “Are you okay?” She looked really concerned.

“Yeah, I’m just ready to go home.”

As we started to walk toward the door, I turned my head and my eyes caught Mr. Turner’s. I just hung my head in shame. It looked as if my past was coming back to haunt me.