Behind His Lens (15 page)

Suddenly, his fingers find my nipple and he
tweaks, hard. My eyes flick open and I cry out with a mixture of pleasure and pain.

“Answer me, Charley,” he demands huskily.

His sensuality is intoxicating, leaving me a heap of tingling nerves, but I manage to muster a small yes.

CHAPTER TEN

Jude

The lights illuminate her skin as if she’s some erotic fantasy brought to life before me. She’s arches into me like a flower straining toward the sun and I can’t help myself. She wants me, her entire body screams it. Her nipples harden into tight buds beneath my touch. Her mouth gapes open as her head tilts back onto my chest. The way her hips press against my dick makes me want to take her right here, but I can’t. This can’t go that far, and I have to be the one to make sure of it.

But when she pushes her ass against my erection,
the move threatens to undo me. I twist her around, push her against me, and capture her cherry-red lips roughly. I’ve wanted to kiss her since the photo shoot, and now that her mouth is connected with mine, I know I’ll never get my fill. Her tongue sweeps across my bottom lip, capturing my soul and gripping it in her delicate hands. A hard, carnal growl moves through my throat and she pushes her body flush against mine. My hands slip through her soft curls, holding her neck and tugging her closer as I deepen the kiss.

Our hearts beats wildly
, pressed together and pounding against one another. I’m trying to control my reaction to her but it’s hopeless. I’m leading the kiss, controlling her and possessing her mouth, but when she shudders against me, every thought slips from my mind. Our bodies move on their own accord. She wraps her hands through my hair and pulls hard, showing me what she wants. She needs a release as badly as I do, but she’s scared to tell me, scared to do something so scandalous in a club full of people, even if those people are drunk and consumed in their own dancing.

A dangerous thought spurs me forward. She might be threatening every facet of my old life, but pleasuring a woman is something the last few years have taught me well and I intend on showing her exactly how adept I am.

Charley

His tongue drags along my lips, begging for entrance, and the moment I let him, my world flips upside down. Heat floods my body and I can’t keep the moans from escaping my mouth as our tongues collide. Holy hell. His kiss seizes my mind, and when his hand drifts down the front of my dress, I almost cry out in anticipation. We’re molded so close together that no one could even see his hand tugging the bottom of my dress up. I’ve never done anything like this. I’ve never even wanted to, but I’d rather die than have him stop now. I don’t care if light suddenly floods the club and everyone’s attention turns toward us; I’d still let him consume me because that’s what Jude does to me. He makes me
feel
. He pushes thoughts and reason away and gives me only things with which I can experience with my five senses. Smelling his erotic aroma of lust and cologne. Hearing his moans rock through his body, telling me just how turned on I’m making him. Seeing the fierce desire clouding his handsome features. Tasting his minty breath as our mouths collide. But most of all touching and feeling. Feeling his hand slip down the front of my dress and slide up the inside of my thigh.

He spins small circles on the
sensitive flesh just below my thong and my mind goes black. I can’t process anything except the tingles of pleasure radiating from his touch. He hasn’t felt my wet thong, yet I’m about to come undone.

Goose bumps bloom across my skin as he leans close
to my ear, “Open your legs for me, Charley.”

I tuck my head under his chin as my feet spread, ever so slightly, but enough for his hand to slide upward, so luxurio
usly slow that I think I might go insane. I’m breathing raggedly, trying to concentrate on slowing my heart. But then his fingers find my thong and I gasp as my body spasms instinctively.

“Oh, Charley.
You’re so wet. So ready for me.” His ragged words collide into me as his fingers run possessively up and down my center.

“Please,” I moan huskily into his mouth, overwhelmed with need.

He slides two fingers across my inner thigh, teasing my thong aside, and I cry out; but Jude’s there capturing my mouth and feeding off my cries as his fingers slide across my wetness.

“Oh, please,” I sound pained, tortured, needy.

He’s barely touched me, but I’m so close to the edge. It’s been so long since someone’s touched me like this. His hands move so seductively, as if he knows exactly where to linger, where to drag the pad of his thumb so that it sends delicious waves of pleasure coursing through me. His finger teases my entrance, but he won’t take it that far. We don’t have the luxury of time and Jude knows it.

Instead, he spins small, mindboggling circles around and around, teasing out my desire.

“Come for me, Angel,” his words demand, and I know my body will comply because he’s in control of me, of my world.

He
rubs right where I need it the most, I bite down on his neck to muffle my cries, yet even then I can hear the faint echoes of my, “Oh, yes. Oh, God. Yes, Jude,” as I fall over the edge. My entire body greedily rocks against his skilled fingers. My world shatters into a never-ending bliss and Jude is right there with me, murmuring in my ear and coaxing every last drop of my orgasm out of me.

As the waves of my desire
-induced delusion wane, the world around me begins to slowly filter back in. The blaring sounds of the music, the dancing people, and the entire room that exists around me. Holy hell. I can’t believe I just did that. Jude’s arm is still locked around me, but I feel like I’ve just awoken from a dream as it fades away, out of reach, leaving me in this scary reality. Where do we go from here?

I stay tucked under his chin, willing the world to stop turning, to go back to the moment before. What’s he thinking?
Surly he needs his release as well, but that won’t be quite as easy in the middle of the dance floor.

Finally,
I will myself to glance up and find Jude looking down at me with such sweet desire written across his features that a shot of lust spirals through me. My body is so in-tune to his commands, but we hardly know each other. When did it learn that he was in control? After he coaxed out the most delicious orgasm I’ve ever had?

“We should get back to the group, Naomi’s probably worried about you,” he admits
, with a look of disdain as he straightens the bottom of my dress. His touch is so sweet and innocent, as if he wasn’t the one pulling it up indecently only moments before.

“What about you?” I ask, dropping my hand to the outside of his jeans. He’s so
large and his excitement is impossible to ignore when I’m pressed so close to him. With a growl, he captures my hand and shakes his head.

“Later,” he promises
, placing a gentle kiss to my wrist.

I pout with a silly frown, “Not fair.”

“Hmm,” he hums, bending down to capture my pouty lip and tease another seductive kiss out of me. That’s what it feels like when he kisses me. He leads our mouths, coaxing out my desire before I even realize I have any to give.

“I want you, Charley.”
His mouth trails over my cheek and down to the sensitive skin just under my ear lobe. “Come home with me.”

His revelation and request is everything I wanted to hear and I find myself nodding before thinking it over. Yes. Yes. Yes.

Without another word, he twines his fingers through mine and pulls us back to the VIP section. I don’t know what happened in that time, but something shifted between us. I can feel it swirling in the musky club air. I expected him to drop my hand once we got back to everyone, but he tugs me closer, wrapping his arm around my waist, and keeping me pinned to his side.

“Oh, hold on. You’ve got some of my lipstick on your lips and cheek.” I dip my thumb into my mouth and swipe it across his skin, cleaning him off.

“It was worth it to get to taste that delicious mouth of yours.” His blue eyes are already heating up again and I have to laugh and lighten the mood or we’ll be kicked out of the club for indecent exposure.

After the lipstick
is gone, he leans down to offer a chaste kiss on my cheek. When I look up, Bennett, Hudson, Naomi, and half of the VIP group are all staring as us with befuddled expressions. Can they see the orgasm written across my features? Is my hair wild and untamed, or am I imagining things?

I wish I could ignore their gaze, but it’s too late. J
ude and I should have just left. The fun is over. It dissipated all too quickly, leaving a tight pressure in my chest that threatens to suffocate me on the spot. Before I fully realize my actions, I’m tugging myself free from Jude’s sturdy arms and building the fortress around my heart.

I want to rewind, back to when decisions didn’t need to be made, when I didn’t need to separate myself from this man. God, why do I have to think so much? Why do I have to leave this situation before he leaves me? I have no clue what he’s thinking, but I can’t go back to when my life was a never-ending black fog. Those days were almost impossible to get through and I can’t let Jude drag me back there. I know he wouldn’t mean to hurt me, but I know I’d be the one to care too much, feel too much, love too much.
Nothing can protect me from a broken heart. Not even his promises.

I already lost myself in his touch and something tells me it
wouldn’t compare to what would happen if I go home with him.

“Charley?” Jude whispers in my ear, begging me to look at him, but I don’t. I can’t.

I shrug him off. “I need to talk to Naomi really quick. I’ll be right back.” His warm breath slips away until all I can feel is the recycled club air. Naomi’s eyebrows perk up as I move toward her and I hope she can see the silent plea written across my features. In an instant, she nods in understanding and extracts herself from Bennett so we can head over to grab our jackets from the coat check.

“Jeez. Were you with Jude that whole time?” she asks
in a hushed tone.

I bite my lip and nod, not meeting her eyes.

“Well, you have to come home with me. If I leave with Bennett, we’ll have sex, and I’m not ready yet. It’s too soon.” I almost laugh. That was the last thing I’d expected her to say. My shoulders relax and already my breathing comes a little easier. She’s saving me without even realizing it.

“No problem, we’ll share a cab back.” My voice is oddly calm, but I know it’s because I’m already burying the emotions Jude had resurrected from deep within m
e— tucking them away behind layers of lace and curls and red lipstick.

“Thank you so much!” She grabs her jacket and hands me mine with an inquisitive stare. “Did Jude finally make a move?”

I feel my complexion burn, “Something like that.”

“Hey,” she says, tugging my arm lightly, “Everything okay?”

“Yeah, Naomi. It’s fine.” Cold. Dead. Waves. Does my voice always sound like that?

She nods and we pull on our coats as we head back to the guys. Everyone’s either leaving to head home or to
the after-party at Hudson’s apartment. But, as I say goodbye to Hudson and thank him for the invitation, Jude’s piercing gaze never leaves me. Naomi and Bennett head toward the exit and Jude falls in step beside me. My body yearns to move toward him, but I shove my hands into my shallow coat pocket.

“I can’t go home with you,” I state plainly.
“Naomi needs me to share a cab with her so she doesn’t go home with Bennett.” I keep my eyes pinned on the concrete floor in front of my heels, but he isn’t convinced. He steps closer to me, tugging my elbow so that I have to stop and look at him.

My face reveals nothing. Not a single emotion. I’ve perfected this hollow glance. It’s what I fed Dr. Francis for
months.

“Don’t do this, Charley.” He rubs his stubbled chin with an exasperated sigh.

I feign confusion with a shrug and a narrowed gaze. “I’m not doing anything.”

“I can feel it. Do you think those walls, that facade you’re hiding behind
, is subtle?” He leans in dangerously close and a shot of fear and lust saturates my nerves. “I see straight through you, Charley. I’m scared too, but I’m not the one running. You are.”

Before I even fully registe
r his words, Jude is brushing past me. He nods to Bennett and Naomi before disappearing through the club, leaving me behind.

…

Jude

Does she think any part of this is easy? Does she not realize how much I’m
stepping out of the boundaries of my old life? There were no games; I told her exactly what I wanted on that dance floor.

It was the hardest hour of my life, letting Hudson talk to her while I l
ooked on from across the table. He didn’t even pay attention to her. He treated her like I’ve treated every girl before her, like a dime a dozen. I needed her to know how wrong he was. That’s why I licked her hand when she spilled her drink. I wanted her to feel beautiful and cherished, and it worked. Hudson’s gaze could’ve sliced my body in half. Smug prick.