Belgarath the Sorcerer (3 page)

‘Probably so,' he agreed, ‘but then they'd be peasants instead of townsmen. A Tolnedran would sooner die than have others think of him as a peasant.'

‘That's ridiculous,' I objected. ‘They spend all day every day grubbing in the dirt, and that means that they
are
peasants, doesn't it?'

‘Yes,' he replied calmly, ‘but they seem to think that if they live in a village, that makes them townsmen.'

‘Is that so important to them?'

‘Very important, boy. A Tolnedran always wants to keep a good opinion of himself.'

‘I think it's stupid, myself.'

‘Many of the things people do are stupid. Keep your eyes and ears open the next time we go through one of these villages. If you pay attention, you'll see what I'm talking about.'

I probably wouldn't even have noticed if he hadn't pointed it out. We passed through several of those villages during the next couple of weeks, and I got to know the Tolnedrans. I didn't care too much for them, but I got to know them. A Tolnedran spends just about every waking minute trying to determine his exact rank in his community, and the higher he perceives his rank to be, the
more offensive he becomes. He treats his servant badly-not out of cruelty, but out of a deep-seated need to establish his superiority. He'll spend hours in front of a mirror practicing a haughty, superior expression. Maybe that's what set my teeth on edge. I don't like having people look down their noses at me, and my status as a vagabond put me at the very bottom of the social ladder, so
everybody
looked down his nose at me.

‘The next pompous ass who sneers at me is going to get a punch in the mouth,' I muttered darkly as we left one village as summer was winding down.

The old man shrugged. ‘Why bother?'

‘I don't care for people who treat me like dirt.'

‘Do you really care what they think?'

‘Not in the slightest.'

‘Why waste your energy then? You've got to learn to laugh these things off, boy. Those self-important villagers are silly, aren't they?'

‘Of course they are.'

‘Wouldn't hitting one of them in the face make you just as silly - or even sillier? As long as
you
know who you are, does it really matter what other people think about you?'

‘Well, no, but -' I groped for some kind of explanation, but I didn't find one. I finally laughed a bit sheepishly.

He patted my shoulder affectionately. ‘I thought you might see it that way - eventually.'

That may have been one of the more important lessons I've learned over the years. Privately laughing at silly people is much more satisfying in the long run than rolling around in the middle of a dusty street with them trying to knock out all of their teeth. If nothing else, it's easier on your clothes.

The old man didn't really seem to have a destination. He had a cart, but he wasn't carrying anything important in it - just a few half-full sacks of grain for his stumpy horse, a keg of water, a bit of food and several shabby old blankets which he seemed happy to share with me. The better we
grew acquainted, the more I grew to like him. He seemed to see his way straight to the core of things, and he usually found something to laugh about in what he saw. In time, I began to laugh, too, and I realized that he was the closest thing to a friend I'd ever had.

He passed the time by telling me about the people who lived on that broad plain. I got the impression that he spent a great deal of his time traveling. Despite his humorous way of talking - or maybe because of it - I found his perceptions about the various races to be quite acute. I've spent thousands of years with those people, and I've never once found those first impressions he gave me to be wrong. He told me that the Alorns were rowdies, the Tolnedrans materialistic, and the Arends not quite bright. The Marags were emotional, flighty, and generous to a fault. The Nyissans were sluggish and devious, and the Angaraks obsessed with religion. He had nothing but pity for the Morindim and the Karands, and, given his earthy nature, a peculiar kind of respect for the mystical Dals. I felt a peculiar wrench and a sense of profound loss when, on another one of those cool, cloudy days, he reined in his horse and said, ‘This is as far as I'm going, boy. Hop on down.'

It was the abruptness more than anything that upset me. ‘Which way are you heading?' I asked him.

‘What difference does it make, boy? You're going west, and I'm not. We'll come across each other again, but for right now we're going our separate ways. You've got more to see, and I've already seen what lies in that direction. We can talk about it the next time we meet. I hope you find what you're looking for, but for right now, hop down.'

I felt more than a little injured by this rather cavalier dismissal, so I wasn't really very gracious as I gathered up my belongings, got out of his cart, and struck off toward the west. I didn't look back, so I couldn't really say which direction he took. By the time I
did
throw a quick glance over my shoulder, he was out of sight.

He had given me a general idea of the geography ahead of me, and I knew that it was late enough in the summer to make the notion of exploring the mountains at this point a very bad idea. The old man had told me that there was a vast forest ahead of me, a forest lying on either side of a river which, unlike other rivers, ran from south to north. From his description I knew that the land ahead was sparsely settled, so I'd be obliged to fend for myself rather than rely on pilferage to sustain me. But I was young and confident of my skill with my sling, so I was fairly sure that I could get by.

As it turned out, however, I wasn't obliged to forage for food that winter. Right on the verge of the forest, I found a large encampment of strange old people who lived in tents rather than huts. They spoke a language I didn't understand, but they made me welcome with gestures and weepy smiles.

Theirs was perhaps the most peculiar community I've ever encountered, and believe me, I've seen a lot of communities. Their skin was strangely colorless, which I assumed to be a characteristic of their race, but the truly odd thing was that there didn't seem to be a soul among them who was a day under seventy.

They made much of me, and most of them wept the first time they saw me. They would sit by the hour and just look at me, which I found disconcerting, to say the very least. They fed me and pampered me and provided me with what might be called luxurious quarters - if a tent could ever be described as luxurious. The tent had been empty, and I discovered that there were many empty tents in their encampment. Within a month or two I was able to find out why. Scarcely a week went by when at least one of them didn't die. As I said, they were all very old. Have you any idea of how depressing it is to live in a place where there's a perpetual funeral going on?

Winter was coming on, however, and I had a place to sleep and a fire to keep me warm, and the old people kept
me well-fed, so I decided that I could stand a little depression. I made up my mind, though, that I'd be gone with the first hint of spring.

I made no particular effort to learn their language that winter, and picked up only a few words. The most continually repeated among them were ‘Gorim' and ‘UL,' which seemed to be names of some sort, and were almost always spoken in tones of profoundest regret.

In addition to feeding me, the old people provided me with clothing; my own hadn't been very good in the first place, and had become badly worn during the course of my journey. This involved no great sacrifice on their part, since a community in which there are two or three funerals every few weeks is bound to have spare clothes lying about.

When the snow melted and the frost began to seep out of the ground, I quietly began to make preparations to leave. I stole food - a little at a time to avoid suspicion - and hid it in my tent. I filched a rather nice wool cloak from the tent of one of the recently deceased and picked up a few other useful items here and there. I scouted the surrounding area carefully and found a place where I could ford the large river just to the west of the encampment. Then, with my escape route firmly in mind, I settled down to wait for the last of winter to pass.

As is usual in the early spring, we had a couple of weeks of fairly steady rain, so I still waited, although my impatience to be gone was becoming almost unbearable. During the course of that winter, that peculiar compulsion that had nagged at me since I'd left Gara had subtly altered. Now I seemed to be drawn southward instead of to the west.

The rains finally let up, and the spring sun seemed warm enough to make traveling pleasant, and so one evening I gathered up the fruits of my pilferage, stowed them in the rude pack I'd fashioned during the long winter evenings, and sat in my tent listening in almost breathless anticipation as the sounds in the camp of the old people gradually
subsided. Then, when all was quiet, I crept out of my temporary home and made for the edge of the woods.

The moon was full that night, and the stars seemed very bright. I crept through the shadowy woods, waded the river, and emerged on the other side filled with a sense of enormous exhilaration. I was free!

I followed the river southward for the better part of that night, putting as much distance as I possibly could between me and the old people - enough certainly so that their creaky old limbs would not permit them to follow.

The forest seemed incredibly old. The trees were huge, and the forest floor, all overspread by that leafy green canopy, was devoid of the usual underbrush, carpeted instead with lush green moss. It seemed to me an enchanted forest, and once I was certain there would be no pursuit, I found that I wasn't really in any great hurry, so I strolled - sauntered if you will - southward with no real sense of urgency, aside from that now-gentle compulsion to go someplace, and I hadn't really the faintest idea of where.

And then, the land opened up. What had been forest became a kind of vale, a grassy basin dotted here and there with delightful groves of trees verged with thickets of lush berry-bushes, centering around deep, cold springs of water so clear that I could look down through ten feet of it at trout, which, all unafraid, looked up curiously at me as I knelt to drink.

And deer, as placid and docile as sheep, grazed in the lush green meadows and watched with large and gentle eyes as I passed.

All bemused, I wandered, more content than I had ever been. The distant voice of prudence told me that my store of food wouldn't last forever, but it didn't really seem to diminish - perhaps because I glutted myself on berries and other strange fruits.

I lingered long in that magic vale, and in time I came to its very center, where there grew a tree so vast that my mind reeled at the immensity of it.

I make no pretense at being a horticulturist, but I've been nine times around the world, and so far as I've seen, there's no other tree like it anywhere. And, in what was probably a mistake, I went to the tree and laid my hands upon its rough bark. I've always wondered what might have happened if I had not.

The peace that came over me was indescribable. My somewhat prosaic daughter will probably dismiss my bemusement as natural laziness, but she'll be wrong about that. I have no idea of how long I sat in rapt communion with that ancient tree. I know that I must have been somehow nourished and sustained as hours, days, even months drifted by unnoticed, but I have no memory of ever eating or sleeping.

And then, overnight, it turned cold and began to snow. Winter, like death, had been creeping up behind me all the while.

I'd formulated a rather vague intention to return to the camp of the old people for another winter of pampering if nothing better turned up, but it was obvious that I'd lingered too long in the mesmerizing shade of that silly tree.

And the snow piled so deep that I could barely flounder my way through it. And my food was gone, and my shoes wore out, and I lost my knife, and it suddenly turned very, very cold. I'm not making any accusations here, but it seemed to me that this was all just a little excessive.

In the end, soaked to the skin and with ice forming in my hair, I huddled behind a pile of rock that seemed to reach up into the very heart of the snowstorm that swirled around me, and I tried to prepare myself for death. I thought of the village of Gara, and of the grassy fields around it, and of our sparkling river, and of my mother, and - because I was still really very young - I cried.

‘Why weepest thou, boy?' The voice was very gentle. The snow was so thick that I couldn't see who spoke, but the tone made me angry for some reason. Didn't I have reason to cry?

‘Because I'm cold and I'm hungry,' I replied, ‘and because I'm dying and I don't want to.'

‘Why art thou dying? Art thou injured?'

‘I'm lost,' I said a bit tartly, ‘and it's snowing and I have no place to go.' Was he
blind
?

‘Is this reason enough amongst thy kind to die?'

‘Isn't it enough?'

‘And how long dost thou expect this dying of thine to persist?' The voice seemed only mildly curious.

‘I don't know,' I replied through a sudden wave of self-pity. ‘I've never done it before.'

The wind howled and the snow swirled more thickly around me.

‘Boy,' the voice said finally, ‘come here to me.'

‘Where are you? I can't see you.'

‘Walk around the tower to thy left. Knowest thou thy left hand from thy right?'

He didn't have to be so insulting! I stumbled angrily to my half-frozen feet, blinded by the driving snow.

‘Well, boy? Art thou coming?'

I moved around what I thought was only a pile of rocks.

‘Thou shalt come to a smooth grey stone,' the voice said. ‘It is somewhat taller than thy head and as broad as thine arms may reach.'

‘All right,' I said through chattering teeth when I reached the rock he'd described, ‘now what?'