Beloved (25 page)

“Please stop arguing,” Kira begged, clapping her hands to get their attention. Mahli growled and hissed.

Zin took a few steps toward her, his fists clenched at his side. “You have no right to speak in this meeting.”

Nigel was there in an instant, shoving Zin so hard, he fell back and landed in the dirt. Aleese ran to his side, swearing and cursing. Now everyone was on their feet, some shoving and others backing away, fear and confusion in their eyes.

“Stop!” Kira screamed, but it only made things worse. Even Blayde and Brenna were exchanging glares, as if arguing with their thoughts and for a brief moment Kira wanted to join them. But then she noticed Jaya with her hands over her ears, her eyes wide, showing the same fear and confusion she’d seen in the others.

Kira jumped off the log, ran to her and pulled her hands away from her ears. “Jaya, stop. You’re causing this. Please, stop. Think of something happy, like when you play with Mahli.” She took Jaya’s face in her hands. “I love you, Jaya. Everyone here loves you. You don’t need to worry. We’re safe. My friends won’t hurt you or any of us. I promise.”

Jaya’s eyes shifted from the crowd to Kira. “We are safe?”

“Yes. I promise.” Kira tucked a strand of hair behind Jaya’s ear. “Make me happy. Make everyone happy.”

Jaya smiled. “I will try.”

Kira led Jaya to the front of the group. “Calm them. You can do it.”

Jaya took several deep, cleansing breaths, and the tension in the clearing eased. Some people continued talking, but most looked dazed, with no clue why they’d acted the way they had. A few more moments passed and Brenna called them back to order. Everyone took their seats except Zin and Aleese who stomped away from the clearing.

Good riddance
, Kira thought as she helped Jaya off the log. “Can you stay here and keep an eye on Mahli for me?”

“Yes.” She took Kira’s place next to Lessa while Kira approached Blayde and Brenna.

“Maybe I shouldn’t be here.”

“Do not say that,” Brenna said. “Lairdor is your home now. You are a part of us.”

“No, I mean
here
. . . in the clearing. I can go to my pod or maybe down by the creek until you’re finished talking about this. That way everyone can speak freely and not worry about hurting my feelings or anything. Besides, they’re right. I’m the one who put us in danger. If they want me to leave, I will go.”

Blayde put his hand on Brenna’s shoulder. “Maybe she is right about leaving the clearing. It might help us convince them she did nothing wrong if they know we speak kindly of her, even when she is not present.” He dropped his hand and this time spoke to Kira. “I can take you there and will come for you when we are done.”

“Thank you. I don’t know what I would have done if you hadn’t accepted me into your family.”

Brenna wrapped her arms around Kira. “We are the ones who are grateful.” She released her and took a step back. “This will all work out. You will see.”

“I hope so.”

Blayde took Kira to the creek, then returned to the meeting, leaving her alone with her troubled thoughts. Living in Lairdor was a hard life with no amenities or comforts, and it would only get worse when the growing season was over and food became scarce. But in spite of that, she loved it here. While in Xantara she always felt pressured to be the perfect lady, like Mara. But here she could be herself and the people accepted her, faults and all.

Kira walked upstream until she found her favorite spot, a small pool protected from the current by a natural dam. Tiny orange and purple fish swam in the still water. She sat on a rock and watched a few come to the surface to lick the air, then dive back down into the crystal clear water. Others danced around in circles, chasing their friends in a game that made Kira smile. How she wished life could be so easy and free.

Kira
. Lydia’s voice whispered in her mind.

Kira tensed. That’s all she needed—Lydia in her head trying to convince her to go back to Xantara.
Things are a little tense here, can we talk later?

Tense? What’s happened?

Nothing. It’s just that the Royal’s have returned from their hunt and found out I brought you here. They are discussing Lairdor’s fate.

Fate?
Altaria appeared at her side. “What do you mean by fate?”

“Al, I told you it wasn’t a good time.” Kira looked over her shoulder and whispered, “You can’t be here. I’m already in enough trouble. You need to go.”

“I am not leaving until I know you are safe.” She knelt in the dirt at Kira’s feet and shifted into Lydia’s form—genuine concern in her eyes. “What will they do to you?”

Kira had held it together until then—she could be tough around Altaria and push away her emotions—but for some reason, seeing Lydia’s concern for her brought everything to the surface. Tears burned her eyes but she tried to push them away. “I’m not in danger. They would never hurt me, but . . .” She swiped at a runaway tear. “They might make me leave.”

Lydia sat back on her heels and released the tension in her shoulders. “I don’t understand why that isn’t a good thing. Don’t you
want
to come back to Xantara?”

“It’s not that simple. I left because being there put all of you in danger. I’m sure King Tyrius hasn’t changed his mind about wanting me dead and it seems stupid and irresponsible for me to go back when nothing has changed.”

“But it has changed. Octavion and Father plan to approach Tyrius about a treaty. Mara has promised support from Finvarra and Nestor from Morganstar. If Tyrius refuses, he’ll have three kingdoms refusing to trade with him and since Kazedon is basically swamp land and their only commodities are the reeds they weave into baskets, they will be in a world of hurt if he doesn’t agree. They’ve got him cornered.”

“Being cornered isn’t always a good thing, Lydia. It could make things worse.”

“Not with Tyrius. He has several younger brothers who’d love to have the throne and will put a lot of pressure on him to sign the treaty. If he doesn’t, they might have cause to remove him.”

Kira leaned closer, her voice a deep whisper. “And killing someone isn’t cause enough?”

Lydia looked away, her focus now on the fish in the pond. “Of course, but Tyrius will only argue that you killed a prince and future king. That’s much worse than killing a commoner like you.”

“But according to you and everyone else in Xantara, I’m the future queen. How does that figure into their justification?”

Lydia returned her focus to Kira with a smile. “That is what Father is presenting to them—that you are the future Queen of Xantara and the only one who can give his son an heir.”

An heir
. A deep pain settled into her heart. She wrapped her arms around her torso to hold herself together. “Maybe Octavion didn’t tell you, but I was stabbed with the dorsal fin of a S’Kiff. I can’t give him an heir. Which is another reason for me to stay here. Octavion should forget about me and find someone else, someone who can give him children. He deserves that.”

“He told me, but . . .” Lydia reached for her, but Kira scooted away. “Look. I know you’re hurting and I know what a S’Kiff will do to me or anyone else from my world, but you’re blood is different and it may not be affected like ours. Plus, you’re a healer, Kira. Maybe the Crystor has already fixed everything and you’ve been too busy to notice.”

Kira wanted to believe her. She’d spent several nights lying awake thinking the same thing, that if she could heal every other part of her body, she should be able to heal her womb. But there’d been no sign of change. “I can feel or sense every drop of blood that flows through my veins and feel every pore on the surface of my skin. If I focus hard enough, I can even feel my scalp tingle as my hair grows. But when I concentrate on healing . . .
that
. . . there is only darkness.”

Lydia’s smile returned. “Mara once told me the same thing. She can lay her hand on a woman’s belly and tell you everything about the child that grows in her womb, but if the woman is not with child, she feels only darkness. There have been many times she wondered if that a woman was barren, but then was proven wrong when she gave birth to a healthy child.”

A small lump began to form in Kira’s throat. She didn’t want false hope, but hearing Lydia explain how Mara’s gift worked, actually made sense. Kira had wondered if something so miraculous that could create life and nurture it for months, was simply too sacred to be manipulated by an outside force like the Crystor.

“Besides,” Lydia continued. “Octavion can’t find ano-ther.” The last word came out disjointed, as if she’d misspoken or wanted to take it back.

“What do you mean?”

Lydia stood and walked a few feet away, keeping her back to Kira. “Nothing. I should probably go now.”

Kira joined her, physically forcing her to turn around so they were face to face. “Tell me.”

“He didn’t want you to know. He’ll be furious if I tell you.”

Kira crossed her arms. “And I will never speak to you again if you don’t.”

A few seconds of uncomfortable silenced passed between them before Lydia let out a deep sigh. “All right, but if he kills me, you’ll have to live with that for the rest of your life.”

Kira shifted her weight to one foot. “I’m willing to risk it.”

Lydia pulled her braid in front and twisted it between her fingers. “Remember when you healed his leg, how hard it was for him and how worried he was that your blood would affect him?”

“Yeah, I also remember Al putting him in chains.”

“Right. Well, when a Royal chooses a mate, normally there’s this sacred ceremony where they are bound. It’s part of the curse. They can only choose one mate and if they stray—”

“They become a Darkord. I already know that. What does that have to do with me healing him?”

Lydia bit on the corner of her bottom lip. “During the ceremony, the two unite by sharing their blood. They are
blood bound
from that moment on.”

Kira looked down at the hand she’d cut that day, remembering how his blood had affected her and how hers had calmed him. “Octavion and I are blood bound?”

“Yeah.”

Kira could feel the heat drain from her face as she stumbled back to sit on her rock. “So, what does that mean exactly?”

Lydia kneeled in front of her again and took her hands. “It means you’re already married—and we are sisters.”

“But that’s not possible. He would have told me. That night in the cabin, we almost . . .” Her stomach twisted into a knot. He’d refused her when they could have shared something very special. So much heartache could have been avoided if he’d just been honest with her. “He lied to me.”

“Please don’t be angry with him. He wanted you to be able to choose as he did. He’d known you longer and knew you were the only one for him, but you’d just met him and everything was new and uncertain for you. The last thing he wanted was for you to feel pity or choose to stay with him out of obligation. He wanted you to fall in love with him. He needed you to
want
him, without any doubt or reservation.”

Images from the times they’d spent together flashed through Kira’s mind like an old movie, flickering from one scene to another. She’d been so busy wondering if he loved her and why he hadn’t asked her to marry him, that she hadn’t expressed her own feelings. Even when she’d asked him to make love to her, she’d wavered for just an instant and maybe he’d thought she questioned her feelings for him. All this time he was waiting for her to make the kind of commitment he had.

Instead, she’d accused him of still being in love with Serena. When things got rough, she ran away and hid. She didn’t believe in his ability to keep her safe from Tyrius. Love should be forever. It should be a bond that can never be broken, even when faced with tragedy and death. She’d learned that from Nigel. He knew how to love forever. He knew of sacrifice.

Kira took her hands back and wiped away the tears that had fallen to her cheeks. “This changes things.”

“I thought it might. Just do me a favor and be
sure
you love him. As much as I want the two of you to be together, I’d never forgive myself if you went back out of pity.”

“I’m sure.”

“She should not be here.” A man’s gruff voice came from behind them. “Someone could have followed her.”

Kira jumped to her feet and spun around. Blayde stood with his fists on his hips, nostrils flaring, his eyes filled with anger.

“No one followed me,” Lydia said.

“She’s leaving,” Kira said, putting herself between them.

His eyes shifted from Lydia to Kira. “I do not think you realize the gravity of the situation here. Brenna and I put our very future on the line to stick up for you and you bring her back here. What’s to stop you from doing that when we move?”

“Move?” Lydia asked. “Why are you moving?”

Blayde huffed the air out of his lungs. “Because you will give away our location and put us in danger.”

Lydia’s face faded away and Altaria appeared, taking a similar stance as Blayde. “We will do nothing of the sort.”

Kira put her hands out to the side, one toward Altaria and the other toward Blayde. “Stop it. There’s no reason to argue.”

Blayde crossed his arms over his chest. “We voted and everyone agrees that Lairdor needs to relocate. It’s the only way to ensure our safety the king of Panthera.”

Kira dropped her arms and turned to face him. “What about me?”

His demeanor softened. “We are going to leave that decision up to you, but if you choose to go with us, you cannot have contact with her or her brother.”

“And if I choose to go with them?”

“Our new location will remain a secret, even from you.”

“But that’s not fair. You have contact with your father and other people here have friends outside of Lairdor. Why must I give up everything to stay here?”

He looked at Altaria. “You can have friends, but not the son and daughter of a king who turned us away and made us his enemy. I should have told you this before, but we went to King Belesgar a few years back when our people were starving and several had died. We heard he was a just king and helped those in need, but he refused to listen. Instead he banned our people from trading in Xantara and said we’d be killed if caught hunting on his land.” His eyes shifted to Kira. “You did not tell me she was a Xantarian princess.”