Best of Three (Counting on Love) (33 page)

She liked being needed, it turned out. She was even good at it some of the time.

All of that hit her as she stared at Nate. The guy who had gotten in too deep and too fast with her and had created a lasting bond with her whether he liked it or not.

“We need to talk,” he told her.

Emotions rolled through her fast and hot. The kaleidoscope she felt when he was around seemed to be spinning too fast, the colors and sensations changing on top of one another, pushing each other out of the way, tumbling around until she felt dizzy and out of control.

“Not now. I need some time.”

“Emma—”

Cody stepped forward, putting himself partway between them. “Everything okay?” He was looking at Nate as he said it, but there was a warning in his tone.

Cody was a nice guy, but he’d step in when needed and Emma knew he’d be on her side. At least initially.

“No, everything is not okay,” Nate said, his frustration and tension clear. “I need Emma.”

“She wants some time,” Cody told him evenly, using her words.

“There is no time,” Nate said, reaching for her. “Let’s go.”

“Hang on.” This came from Mitch, who caught Nate’s wrist before he touched Emma. “I think she said no.”

Emma looked from Mitch to Nate to Cody to Nate. Cody was the nice guy who wanted nothing from her, Mitch was the guy who wanted almost nothing from her—a date to a concert and maybe a quickie before he dropped her off afterward—and Nate was the guy who wanted her to fricking marry him, move in with him and raise their baby as if they were a happy family rather than two people who just couldn’t keep their mouths shut or their clothes on.

And that was worse than wanting nothing from her.

She wanted it to be real and it wasn’t. It couldn’t be. Not now. Yes, he’d said he’d fallen for her. Maybe that was even true. But this was the
start
of something. This was new. And now they were pregnant. And they’d never know if this start, this new thing, could have truly grown into something real and strong and lasting. Now they were bound together by their child, not by love or commitment to each other or a desire to be together no matter what.

She could have a life with Nate.
The
life with Nate. The one that would look, and maybe even feel, perfect. But deep down she would always wonder—was he there with her because he wanted to be or because he was a good guy who wanted to be a good father.

Nate jerked his hand away from Mitch. “This is between me and Emma.” He focused that intense gaze on her and moved in closer. “We need to talk. We need to tell Conner. Together.”

She moved back, stepping on Cody’s foot but unable to even say she was sorry. “Conner? You’re here because you’re worried about Conner? You thought I was going to tell him without you and cause a huge problem for you?”

That was wonderful. Peachy even. Nate had come after her because he was afraid she was going to do something stupid. Not because he was concerned for her, not because he was excited—that was for sure—but because he didn’t trust her.

“Aren’t you going to smell my breath?” she asked. “I mean this is a bar, full of liquor and men, and I’m not exactly known for my pious ways. I’ve been here for over an hour, Nate. God knows what trouble I could have gotten into.”

Nate’s jaw clenched and his eyes narrowed.

“And how do you know I haven’t already told Conner?” she asked, flinging her arms wide. Cody and Mitch both took a step back. “Everyone knows that I’m an open book. There’s not much I think that doesn’t come spilling out of my mouth. I think you’ve pointed that out a time or two.”

“Emma,” Nate said warningly. “Calm down.”

And there was the bossy thing. It had been a turn on in the beginning but he’d been completely right—outside of the bedroom and over time, it got old.

“I’m tired of you telling me what to do,” she said, planting her hands on her hips. “I don’t want to talk, I’m not going to move in with you, I’m not going to marry you and I’m not going to tell my brother that I’m pregnant.”

The last word,
the
word, hung in the air between them as she stared at Nate. She couldn’t decipher the emotions in his eyes, but she could tell by the set of his mouth that he was pissed.

It was probably a good thing they were in public.

Public. Slowly she became aware that Nate was staring, with a combination of resignation and oh-fuck, at something behind her. She let her eyes close for a moment, bracing herself. It was a someone. When she opened them she made herself turn.

To face her brother.

“Emma,” Conner said evenly, his expression hard, not revealing any specific emotion, “You need to go with Nate.”

Dammit. Dammit, dammit, dammit.

She was causing a scene. The music was still loud and not
everyone
had noticed the little showdown in the middle of the dance floor but that also drove home an important realization—it wasn’t uncommon for Emma to be in the midst of a scene at Trudy’s. It was the shock-and-awe thing Nate had called her on. She liked the attention. She liked the spotlight. She liked stirring things up.

But she was twenty-eight years old. And on her way to being a mom.

She needed to grow up.

“Fine.” She didn’t know what else to say to Conner. She hadn’t wanted him to find out yet. She wasn’t ready for him to know. But…that was called a consequence.

Nate took her arm and steered her through the crowd before she could say or do anything else. She let him, only because she was suddenly tired. Tired of making the wrong call, tired of fighting with him, and tired of holding it together.

By the time they got to the hallway leading to the bathrooms, she’d decided to agree with whatever Nate said.

Until he actually said something.

“Is this why you won’t marry me? Because you don’t want to be monogamous?” He moved in close to her, pinning her against the wall with the tension emanating from his scowl. “Because like it or not, you will
not
be sleeping with anyone else.”

Oh, he kept getting more and more charming with this. But the comment gave her a warm feeling at the same time. She was a mess. “Nate, on the list of four billion reasons I don’t want to marry you, that’s number two billion six hundred million and three.”

“What’s reason number one?”

She couldn’t answer that. She would not admit that she couldn’t look at a ring on her finger every day or hear someone call her Emma Sullivan and not think about how it wasn’t real. And that if she had to live the life she wanted without the love she needed it would slowly eat her up inside. She had to face what
was
real. She and Nate could raise this baby into a wonderful human being. There would be love between the child and each of them and that would be enough.

It would have to be.

But she could not tell him that she didn’t want to marry him because she only wanted him if he was truly in love with her. No. Hell, no.

“I don’t like being bossed around.”

He paused, searching her eyes. Then his gaze dropped to her mouth. “That’s not entirely true.”

The heat jumped up between them like a physical presence and she had to work to breathe normally.

“Knock it off.” She squirmed, hoping he’d move back.

No luck.

He braced a hand on the wall near her ear. “I was an ass back at my office.”

She breathed deep and nodded. “Yes, you were.” He’d also been in shock, so she was inclined to give him some leeway.

“I’m sorry. And I’m very sorry if you think that my reaction had anything to do with Trisha. I know you won’t do anything to hurt this baby.”

She braved meeting his gaze directly and frowned. “That’s not what I was thinking.” She narrowed her eyes. “I know that you know I’m nothing like her.”

That hadn’t been her problem at all. Stacie and Trisha had both hurt him badly and with the jolt of hearing about another unplanned pregnancy, maybe she should have expected him to worry that she’d disappear on him…or something worse.

But she trusted that he knew her.

“I do know you’re nothing like her. Like either of them.” He stroked the back of his fingers down her cheek.

She fought to not turn her face into his touch. “I figure there would be a private investigator here right now if you thought I was going to do something stupid.”

He smiled and everything in her went warmer and softer. Dammit.

“You’re absolutely right about that.”

“Nate?” she said softly.

“Yeah?”

“If I ever find out that you put a PI on me, I will slash his tires and put so many laxatives in his coffee he won’t be able to leave the house for a week. Then I’ll deal with
you
. Got it?”

He grinned. “Got it.”

Her phone rang just in time to keep her from kissing him.

His did too.

They met each other’s eyes as he stepped back and they both fumbled for their phones.

“Hello?” Emma answered.

“Michael?” she heard Nate say.

“Emma, you have to come down here.” It was Shannon. “I’m at the police station.”

“Again?” Emma asked already moving toward the door. She felt Nate right behind her.

“I’m sorry. It was stupid. There was this party and—”

“Dammit, Shannon,” Emma cut in. “Enough already. Enough with the parties and crappy decisions. Cut Ashley and Carrie loose. You’re better than this.”

“No. It wasn’t like that. There was this guy and…” The music in the main room of Trudy’s was loud and Emma lost part of Shannon’s story.

“Were Ashley and Carrie at the party?” Emma asked over the noise around her.

“Yes, but…”

Again she lost the rest of what Shannon was saying.

She hurried past her sisters and Conner, ignoring their concerned looks and attempts to get her to stop. She jammed a finger in her ear as she neared the door in time to hear, “Michael’s in the hospital.”

She shoved the door open, stepping out into the quiet night. “What?” she demanded, continuing to stalk toward her car.

“Michael’s in the hospital.”

“What for?”

“He got in a fight.”

Emma swung around to find Nate. He was still near the door. His phone was against his ear, his other hand curled into a fist. “What are you talking about?” she hissed to Shannon. That didn’t sound like Michael at all. “A fight? What happened?”

“No. It was this one guy. He was…acting weird and when we tried to leave he wouldn’t let us. Me. He didn’t want me to go.”

“Do you know him?” Emma asked.

“No.”

“Who’s party?”

Shannon paused. “Brooke’s.”

Of course. Brooke had introduced Shannon to Ashley and Carrie. “You took Michael to this party too?” How did Shannon have so many party friends? Emma had known Brooke when she was still young enough to go to the park with them and beg Emma to push her higher in the swing. It had never been high enough for that kid. And it sounded like she was always pushing it now too.

Emma could relate.

It was so clear in that moment, that she had to stop and put a hand over her tight chest. Shannon was hanging out with girls like Emma. Like Emma had been. Like she still was in many ways.

“The party was my idea,” Shannon confessed. “But I didn’t know something like this would happen.”

“What happened exactly?” She could freak out later. Right now she needed to help Shannon and Michael. And Nate.

He looked like he was about to break something. Or break in two himself.

She wanted to go to him, to help, to say something that would make him feel better, but she had to get the whole story. And figure out what she could possibly say right now.

“This guy was hitting on me. He didn’t care that I was with Michael. We tried to leave and he blocked the door. He shoved Michael back and said that I couldn’t leave.”

Shannon was talking too fast and it was obvious she was trying to talk past the tears and Emma wavered for a moment. Shannon reminded her of Isabelle in a lot of ways.

Emma had always been the leader, the first one to jump into something, the first one to say “let’s do it”. But Isabelle was always right beside her and often the one who first said “I have an idea”. Isabelle was totally an instigator, but Emma was the action girl, the one to get it done, the one to take the risk. Isabelle went along because she trusted Emma. She knew that nothing bad would happen—or if it did, it would happen to Emma first and she’d clean up the mess.

She’d been doing that for Shannon her whole life. Emma was still the do-er. When Shannon wanted to try horseback riding, Emma found a stable and flirted her way into five free lessons for Shannon. When Shannon wanted a kitten for her birthday, Emma had found one and then proceeded to take care of it for the next ten years because Dena was horribly allergic. When Shannon had wanted to learn to drive a stick shift, Emma had taken her to an empty parking lot and when Shannon crashed through the fence by the building, Emma had taken the blame and flirted her way out of the ticket. That had led to four great dates with the cop.