Betrayed by Love (13 page)

“Yes.”

“This is a beautiful house,” Roman said as he put the book back on the shelf. He touched the molding that surrounded the built-ins. “A good place.”

“I feel safe here.” Savannah got to her feet.

“There’s property to be developed in Georgia. I could…I can move my business here.”

Savannah whipped around to face him. “I don’t think we’re in a place to talk about that.”

“Probably not, but I wanted you to know I was serious.”

“I thought we were just going out to eat fries.”

“We can do that too.”

Savannah shook her head. “Still planning ten steps ahead.”

“I try.”

“Roman, I don’t know if I can be in a relationship.”

“I’ll wait until you’re ready. I’ll buy a place in the city. We’ll date.” He said it with such excitement she couldn’t help but laugh.

“Don’t you think we’re past dating?”

She led him up the stairs to the bedrooms. She’d redone her grandparents’ room for herself, and a second bedroom was full of family papers and pictures she promised herself she’d sort someday, but there was a guest room that was always ready to receive someone. Her grandma had taught her that.

“All I know is that whatever it takes, whatever you need, I’ll give it to you,” Roman said as she ushered him into the room.

“I think you mean that.”

“I’ve never meant anything more.”

Savannah looked at him, then whispered, “Good night, Roman.”

* * * * *

He couldn’t sleep. It wasn’t the bed, which was slightly lumpy and squeaked when he moved, nor was it the disquieting lack of city sounds that kept him up.

Savannah was just down the hall. He imagined he could hear her breaths, feel her body in his arms.

He’d lain awake for hours going over what he’d learned today. Nothing was the way he’d imagined it. He had to not only rewrite his understanding of that fateful weekend, but to rewrite his understanding of who he was. What had been done to her was still fresh in his mind. When he closed his eyes he saw the image of her, bound and hurting, helpless. He wanted to rush in and rescue her, but he couldn’t rescue her from the past. She’d rescued herself and made a life from the ruins of what they’d been.

The girl he’d known five years ago was gone, lost to the past, but Savannah was still the only woman he’d ever love. He believed there was one perfect match for each person on Earth, and he’d been lucky enough to find his.

He’d lost her once, he wouldn’t lose her again.

Roman sat up in bed. There was no use trying to sleep. He’d grab his phone and answer some emails until it was light enough to go out for a run. As he stood and stretched he got a strange feeling, a tingling in his hands and down his back. He dropped his arms and went to the window.

From his second-floor window he had a view of the grassy lawn between the house and the barn. He could also see the wrapped second-floor porch, which perched on top of the front porch and stopped one room over.

Standing in the moonlight, wearing nothing but a short robe, was Savannah.

Savannah closed her eyes and let the night air wash over her. She couldn’t sleep, and it wasn’t surprising. She now had to unravel the things she’d believed the past five years and create a new understanding of what had happened. She was both happy and relieved that she hadn’t been wrong about her love and her relationship—Roman had loved her—and bitterly sad that they’d both been fools and wasted something precious.

But now the truth was out, and Roman was here.

The question was, what would happen next.

There was a quiet knock on the bedroom door. Savannah turned her back to the porch rail. Through the glass doors she saw the bedroom door open. Roman wore his suit pants and nothing more. His bare chest was hard with muscle, his eyes hawklike in their intensity. He paused in the doorway that led from the master bedroom onto the porch.

“You’re beautiful.”

Savannah felt as if she stood on a precipice. She could either turn away or jump off the edge. Neither was safe, neither was guaranteed to make her happy.

“I’ve dreamed of seeing you again. I wondered what it would be like if I found you. I knew I missed you, knew I wanted you.” His words were low and intense, as if ripped from deep inside him. “I knew I still loved you. But I never thought that when I saw you again I would feel like I’d finally come home.”

A sob caught in Savannah’s throat. Home.

He’d been her port in the storm, the grounding she needed. He’d been home, and when she lost him she’d lost that sense of belonging. She’d made do here in Savannah, but it had never really been home.

Because he wasn’t here.

“Home,” she whispered.

Roman opened his arms and Savannah went into them. The hug turned to petting. Together they danced backward toward the bed. Roman laid her on her back, her hair spreading across the mattress.

“Savannah, I don’t want to hurt you or push you.”

“I can take care of myself.”

“I know, but I want to take care of you, protect you. I failed you five years ago, and I won’t fail you again.” His eyes searched her face. “Sex isn’t why I want you.”

“It’s not?” she asked with a grin. He didn’t smile in return.

“If you told me you never wanted to have sex again I’d still be here, still want you.”

Tears slid from the corners of her eyes. “Thank you.”

He kissed the tears away, then lay beside her, just holding her. For a long time Savannah drifted in the perfect happiness of the moment. She wanted to stay like this forever, safe in his arms as the night serenaded them. But it wasn’t enough. His scent, the warm press of his body and the even pace of his breath did more than just soothe her—it aroused her. Soon she was shifting restlessly, wanting more but unwilling to end this perfect moment.

“Touch me,” she said.

“Are you sure?”

“Yes.”

“You’ll tell me if I hurt you?”

“Yes.” Savannah undid the tie of her robe, spreading the edges open to reveal her naked body. His gaze raked her, lingering on her breasts and pussy.

“My beautiful Savannah.”

Roman leaned in and captured her lips in a kiss. Their tongues touched and he tasted the same as she remembered. His lips traced her cheeks, her eyelids and then down her throat.

Roman kissed each place Wilcox had hurt, easing the memory of that terrible ordeal from her skin. Tears slipped from his eyes when he reached her thighs, which were permanently marked from the cane. He traced the thin white scars with fingers and lips. She drew him up until she could kiss the tears from his cheeks and silence his litany of “I’m sorry, I’m sorry” with a kiss.

He scooted lower, kissing his way down her belly until his mouth was on her sex. He brought her to a slow, gentle orgasm with his fingers and tongue. He eased one, then two fingers into her. She was tight. It had been a long time.

With ripples of pleasure still gliding through her, she pulled Roman to her. His chest settled on hers, his hips a warm weight between her legs. Together they positioned themselves so his cock was in place.

With gentle pressure, he slid into her.

“I never stopped loving you,” he said. There was sweat on his forehead, and his eyes were stark.

She wrapped one leg over his ass, urging him to move just a bit faster. “I hated you, the man I thought you were. But I never stopped loving the Roman I’d first fallen in love with.”

He came first, whispering apologies, but she liked it. She liked feeling him lose control and fall to pieces.

With his cock still in her he shifted his weight to one side so he could reach between her legs. His fingers on her clit, his cock in her and his eyes on her face, he brought her to orgasm.

Savannah slept until noon the next day. The sun was well up by the time she blinked herself awake. She stretched and muscles low in her body twitched and twinged. Remembering last night, she rolled over to see that the bed was empty but Roman was seated on the vanity stool.

“Good morning.”

“Good morning. What time is it?”

“It’s afternoon.”

“I should be up.”

“You needed to sleep.”

Savannah yawned and blinked. The bed was too comfortable to get out of. She pulled her pillow into place and lay down on her side, facing him. “You’re dressed.”

“I have to go.”

Savannah’s heart stopped, then beat so loud she was sure he’d hear it. She looked away from him, out the window.

“I need to go back to Chicago for a few days, no more. Then I’ll come back here.”

“You don’t have to explain yourself to me.”

“Yes, I do. And more importantly, I want to. There are meetings I can’t afford to cancel. If you want I’ll walk you through the details of the deals I’m in the middle of so you understand why I have to go.”

Savannah blinked. He sounded stern and slightly exasperated. He sounded…like Roman. Not like a man trying to give her the brush-off, or a man riddled by guilt and regret.

“Okay, explain it to me.”

He nodded, then came to sit beside her on the bed. “Chicago has several areas that were harder hit than others by the recession. In particular, many of them were held by a title company—”

“Stop.” Savannah held her hand up. “I changed my mind.”

Roman planted a hand on either side of her and leaned close. “You thought I was leaving.”

“Well, maybe you got what you came for.”

“One night of sex and I’m done? This chapter of my life closed?”

“Something like that.”

“Well, you’re wrong, and the only way to prove that is to leave and come back.”

Savannah sat up, forcing him to give her space. “You can come back, but we don’t even know what this thing between us is. Maybe we should just be happy with knowing the truth and with last night.”

“No.” Roman pulled something from his pocket. “This,” he gestured between them, “is soul mates finding each other again. And this,” he held up a phone, “is your new cell phone.”

“What happened to my old cell phone?”

“It was a dinosaur. Now we’ll be able to chat and see each other whenever we want.”

He went out into the hall and called her. Savannah answered, watching his face pop up on the screen, her familiar hallway behind him. “Hello, beautiful.”

“Hello, handsome.”

“What are you wearing?”

Savannah laughed. “Why don’t you come see for yourself?”

An hour later, Savannah stood on her porch and watched him drive away. As the car disappeared between the shoulder-high corn, she couldn’t help but wonder if she’d ever see him again.

* * * * *

He called her from the airport, then again from a cab in Chicago. He texted her from his meeting and she scolded him and told him to get back to work. That night they lay in bed, phone propped up so they could see each other, and talked for hours, the way they used to.

“Roman, there’s something I’m worried about.”

“What’s that, gorgeous?”

“I don’t know if I can ever… I don’t know if I could ever be a submissive again.”

The truth was that after they had sex last night she’d had a dream where he was dominating her. But that dream was shortly followed by a nightmare memory of Mr. Wilcox’s abuse. “I don’t know if I’ll ever want kinky sex again. Sometimes, when I was at the clubs, I would see something I found…inspiring, but it was never about sex for me.”

“That doesn’t matter. I don’t need BDSM play.”

“Are you sure? After all, you were at a club.” She raised a brow. “That was a members-only club, so you must have been there before.”

“I go, but only to watch. I’ve felt so…dead inside, that I went looking for anything that might make me feel something.”

Savannah had the urge to throw up more roadblocks, to find a way to make this not work. It would be easier, safer, than letting him into her life.

“There’s something I want to try when I get back.”

“Roman…” Savannah didn’t think she had it in her to try anything.

“You can say no, but… I want you to Dominate me.”

“What?” Savannah nearly fell off the bed in surprise.

“You’re a beautiful Domme. If that gives you pleasure, then I’ll be your sub.”

“You’ll be submissive.”

“Yes.”

“You know you’re not in any way submissive.”

“I’ll learn.”

“Roman…”

“Savannah, I want to do this, for you.”

Finally she couldn’t hold it in anymore and a little giggle escaped her. “I can’t imagine you as a sub.”

“I’m trying to be serious here, woman.”

“I know and, uh, thank you, but I don’t want you to be my sub. I don’t want to ever put on the catsuit again. That was just…a way to keep my sanity. There was no pleasure in it. It was a need, a compulsion.”