Beyond The Music (The Rock Gods Book 7) (19 page)

Chapter Fifteen

Lincoln and Aaron ate their grilled chicken with a bowl of tossed greens and veggies at the table by the pool. The night air was warm with a light breeze that moved the tree branches over the patio area. Lincoln choose to keep the lights off around them except for the pool lights under the water. It made things look . . . better, he justified. But if Lincoln were to be honest with himself he’d have to admit his reasoning behind the dim lighting was to be romantic more than anything else. Did it make him a pussy if he admitted that out loud? He didn’t know and he wasn’t exactly sure he cared all that much, either. What he did know was that in this very moment he was happy. Content. Even hopeful.

Jesus, do I dare to hope?

“Why’d you get into nursing?” Lincoln questioned Aaron in between bites of his chicken.

“I like helping people,” Aaron said with a slight shrug to one shoulder. “I tried a bunch of different areas of nursing, but home nursing was the best fit for me. It gives me the opportunity to work one-on-one with the patient to create a well-rounded program for them. I can combine good nutrition with exercise within their means so they can achieve their personal goals and get them to a healthier lifestyle. And living with them twenty-four seven eliminates any chance of cheating on the program I make for them.”

Lincoln laughed when he heard the tone in Aaron’s voice when he said the last phrase. “I haven’t cheated!”

“Well, I wouldn’t say you’ve been one hundred percent on board with the whole process,” Aaron teased.

“Yeah, whatever,” Lincoln grumbled. “I think I’ve done pretty damn good, considering how pissed off I am to have to be doing this at all.”

Aaron placed his hand on top of Lincoln’s forearm and the fingers fanned over the skin. Lincoln stopped chewing and met Aaron’s gaze. Suddenly it was difficult to swallow the food in his mouth and his thoughts drifted back to something Aaron had told him earlier when they were in bed.

“What happened between you and your other patient?” Lincoln asked, unsure if he should ask Aaron something so personal.

“You really want to know about that?” Aaron lifted one eyebrow at Lincoln.

“Sure, why not? Unless you’d rather not tell me, then that’s cool,” Lincoln said.

Aaron set his fork down beside his plate and removed his hand from Lincoln’s arm. “I was young and new to the business and I let things get out of hand.”

“What’d you mean?” Lincoln asked.

Aaron sat back in his seat and grabbed onto his thighs. “I began to have feelings my patient that I had no right developing. He was older and took advantage of my inexperience and stupidity. I thought he wanted more and it turned out he didn’t. Apparently he was more interested in someone giving him a happy ending.”

“How old were you?” Lincoln continued.

“Twenty-two,” Aaron said. “I was working through an agency back then and I could have lost my job if he’d ratted me out, but he didn’t. I suppose I should be grateful for that, even still, I dropped him as a client and referred him to another nurse.”

“Never since?” Lincoln pushed.

Aaron shook his head. “I vowed never to go down that route again while I’m working.”

“Then, why’d you cross that line with me?”

Aaron met Lincoln’s inquisitive stare. He slowly blinked and Lincoln watched Aaron’s eyelashes brush his cheek with each blink. Lincoln wanted to reach out and touch them to see if they were as soft as they looked. Or feel them against his lips. Damn, he wanted to kiss Aaron again.

The sudden cramping in Lincoln’s calf muscle prevented Aaron from answering his question. Lincoln cried out in pain and reached down to grab his leg. The next thing Lincoln knew Aaron had lifted him up and was laying him onto the doublewide chaise lounge chair behind them. Aaron’s hands went to work on loosening the tight knot of muscle in spasm. Aaron sat on the edge of the chair beside Lincoln and his fingers continued to massage. He lifted Lincoln’s leg and set it on his shoulder and began to work the hamstring, along with the calf.

“Better?” Aaron asked when Lincoln’s body began to relax.

Lincoln blew out a long breath. “Yeah, a little bit,” he said. “There’s no warning. They just hit and literally bring me to my knees.”

“When is your next appointment with your neurologist?” Aaron asked.

“I don’t have one,” Lincoln answered.

“Why not?” Aaron questioned. “Didn’t he put you on a schedule or something to monitor you?” Lincoln pinched the bridge of his nose and grimaced when Aaron’s fingers hit the knot of muscle again. “What aren’t you telling me, Linc?” Lincoln attempted to sit up from the lounger and Aaron stopped him with a hand pressed firmly against Lincoln’s chest. “No walking away until you talk to me,” Aaron stated.

“You’re only going to get mad—again,” Lincoln finally answered.

“I can’t help you unless you tell me what’s going on,” Aaron affirmed.

“I don’t have another appointment because I sort of blew off the doctor,” Lincoln blurted.

“Why would you do that?” Aaron was obviously showing restraint by not yelling.

“He wanted me to go on injection medication and I’m not a fan of needles,” Lincoln shrugged.

“Jesus, Lincoln!” Aaron ran a hand through his hair. “Who’s your doctor? I’ll give him a call and go with you to the appointment.”

“Whoa!” Lincoln shoved Aaron’s hand off his chest and sat up on the cushion. “What the fuck, Aaron? I seriously don’t think it’s necessary for you to do that.”

“And if I don’t make that call, are you planning to?” Aaron sure knew how to cut his way right to the point, especially when he already knew the answer to his own question.

“Is this Nurse Aaron busting my balls right now or the Aaron that was sucking on my tongue earlier?”

Aaron’s shoulders slumped. “At the moment, I guess it’s a little bit of both,” he answered in a soft voice. “I’m invested in helping you and that should also include your doctor appointments.”

Lincoln flopped back against the cushion of the lounge chair. “I don’t want to do the needles.” Lincoln’s voice almost trembled when he spoke. “It makes this all so brutally, fucking real.”

Aaron’s fingers ran the length of Lincoln’s arm all the way to his shoulder and squeezed the muscle. “I want to help. Please. Let me be there for you.”

Lincoln closed his eyes. He hated the burn of emotion under his lids that threatened to seep through the cracks and onto his cheeks. He pressed the heels of his hands into his eye sockets to try to stop it, then grabbed on to his head. “I’m not sure I’m strong enough to deal with this and I fucking hate feeling helpless.”

Lincoln’s voice was whisper-soft but he knew Aaron had heard him when Aaron’s mouth was on his and Aaron was stretched out beside him on the lounge chair. Aaron’s arms wrapped around Lincoln and pulled him closer. Their kiss was a mashing of lips not meant for arousal, but more for feeding Lincoln some of his power.

“Give your doubts to me, Lincoln, and I promise to be there for you,” Aaron breathed into Lincoln’s partially opened mouth. “I’ll be your strength, if you let me.”

Aaron held Lincoln quietly for a long time, until another painful leg cramp coiled up tight in Lincoln’s calf muscle. As soon as Aaron got Lincoln relaxed again, he helped Lincoln inside and upstairs to bed. Instead of bothering to set up his massage table, Aaron helped Lincoln out of his clothing and had him lay on his stomach, then Aaron used his massage lotions to try and rub the tension out of Lincoln’s muscles. The massage ended up putting Lincoln to sleep. Lincoln briefly stirred in bed when Aaron pulled the covers up over his bare backside. A moment later Lincoln heard Aaron leave the room.

Lincoln’s room was quiet for about an hour when the scream announcing another leg cramp had Aaron running down the hall to Lincoln’s room wearing his loose fitting, cotton sleep pants and a t-shirt. Aaron yanked back the blankets covering Lincoln and immediately started working on the leg Lincoln was holding. Ten minutes later, Lincoln’s body began to unwind again and Aaron climbed up onto the bed and lay down beside him. Suddenly strong arms enveloped Lincoln and he was tugged against Aaron’s solid form. Lincoln’s face rolled into the bend of Aaron’s neck and the comfort washing through Lincoln stole his breath. He’d never had this before in his life and it felt fucking awesome.

Lincoln inhaled the scent of Aaron’s skin and grinned against Aaron’s neck. “I’m sorry to keep waking you up, but I’m really grateful you’re here,” he said.

Aaron kissed the top of Lincoln’s head. “No worries,” Aaron whispered and pressed his cheek to Lincoln’s hair. “I’m happy I can help.”

“I’m exhausted and I’m sure you must be, too.” Lincoln yawned.

“I’m okay, stop worrying about it,” Aaron soothed.

Lincoln draped an arm over Aaron’s stomach and gripped his side through the t-shirt. A long moment passed and Lincoln began to fidget. “What is it? Are you getting another cramp,” Aaron asked.

Lincoln curled his face against Aaron’s collarbone. “This feels like it’s . . . more than work for you,” Lincoln mumbled. “Am I wrong about that?”

Aaron tipped Lincoln’s head back in his arms and met his gaze. “You’re not wrong,” Aaron finally said. “If this were just about the work, I wouldn’t be lying beside you right now.”

Lincoln smiled lazily at that remark and dropped his head back to Aaron’s shoulder. “Good, I’m glad.”

A few minutes later, Lincoln heard Aaron’s breathing deepen and he knew Aaron had fallen asleep while still holding him. A smile stretched Lincoln’s lips—a
real
smile, one he could feel all the way to his toes.

Lincoln wasn’t sure when it had all changed for him, but things had definitely changed for Lincoln. He wanted Aaron, as illogical as he knew that need was, he seriously wanted the man that now held him in his arms. He wanted Aaron to be part of his life and sharing a real relationship. Not because it was a job for Aaron that had led to something more. Lincoln wanted Aaron to want him, the same way he wanted Aaron—as an equal partner, not because he felt sorry for Lincoln or because he was convinced his nursing skills could fix Lincoln.

Lincoln wasn’t certain a real relationship would work between them. Hell, he wasn’t even sure he was capable of having a solid partnership with someone, because he’d never experienced that himself. And what exactly did he have to offer a healthy man like Aaron? Jesus, he had no right to expect Aaron to want a disabled lover on a long-term basis, or even for a short term fling.

“Stop thinking and go to sleep,” Aaron mumbled.

Lincoln flinched at the sound of Aaron’s voice. “That’s not what I was doing,” he answered.

“Liar.” Aaron tugged him closer. “It’s late. We’ll talk more tomorrow.”

How the fuck did Aaron know what he was doing? Was mind reading one of Aaron’s many skills? Jesus, if that were the case than Lincoln was screwed. Even without the mind reading, Aaron already knew too much about Lincoln. Some of it was shit Lincoln never shared with anyone. That alone was enough to send Lincoln into crisis mode or a full-blown panic attack.

Lincoln only had time to blink before he realized Aaron had flipped him onto his back and Aaron’s solid weight was pressed down on top of him. “You’re still doing it.” Aaron grinned down at Lincoln.

“Doing what?”

Aaron pushed Lincoln’s arms above his head on the mattress and held his wrists. “I can hear you thinking.”

“You can’t hear someone think,” Lincoln balked. He pretended to be annoyed, but the heavy closeness of Aaron was anything but annoying. It was overwhelming for all the right reasons and Lincoln sucked in a sharp breath.

Aaron’s new position was submissive for Lincoln. With anyone other than Aaron, this wouldn’t be happening and Lincoln would have the roles reversed so fast his sex partner wouldn’t know what had happened. In the past, Lincoln had always played the dominant role in bed. But with Aaron, Lincoln didn’t mind being submissive. He knew Aaron would always take care of him and keep him safe.

Aaron dropped his weight down onto Lincoln’s chest and took his mouth. It was a long, thorough possession that made Lincoln feel cherished. Completely.

“Jesus, you make me crazy,” Lincoln exhaled.

“Same here.”

“You have no idea how badly I wish I could flip you onto your back and fuck you into this mattress.” Lincoln took a quick bite of Aaron’s top lip and tugged it away from his teeth.

“Damn, that is a hot visual,” Aaron answered. “Maybe after I get you healthy, I’ll let you do just that.”

Lincoln rolled his hips up against Aaron’s growing erection. Not much was developing between his own legs, but he sure as fuck wanted to make Aaron feel good. “You bottom?” Lincoln panted.

“I usually top,” Aaron answered. “You don’t bottom?”

“Only once, and I didn’t like it.”

“Hmmm, well maybe we can work on that,” Aaron hummed against Lincoln’s mouth.

“Oh, shit.”

Chapter Sixteen

Lincoln woke the next morning with Aaron’s warm body still wrapped around him. Their arms and legs were tangled together and Aaron’s face was pressed into the bend of Lincoln’s neck. Once again, this thing with Aaron was slipping into uncharted territory. Lincoln had never shared a bed overnight with someone unless he’d been intoxicated when he’d fallen into bed. He also hadn’t ever shared a bed with someone he was attracted to and not had sex. Although the last part wasn’t for his lack of trying and if he’d been physically capable, he would have fucked Aaron into a coma all night long.