Bittersweet Endeavors (15 page)

Anvil
reached the side of the bed and
looked down at
Myra
.  “What’s
ailing
her? 
Did she contract
something from the ship, you think?”  He
hastily
removed the handkerchief from his jacket and covered his mouth.

“
Nay
, I don’t believe so.  Too
much time has
passed, surely
nothing
would have lingered this long.”  Seth frowned.  “
The week past,
I
carelessly
soaked her with a bucket
of water
and believe she spent too much time in the cold afterward
s
. 
I
t must’ve caused an
infirmity
within
her chest.”

Anvil lowered the handkerchief and his face softened for a split second when he looked
down
at
Myra
’s helpless body, b
ut he recovered his error.  “Go,” he sternly ordered.  “Find a servant
who’ll
care for her, Seth.  Being here in her room isn’t decent
,
and for all
we
know,
whatever she’s contracted
mayhap
be
a
contagio
n
!”  Anvil stepped back. 

Not once
ha
d
Seth disobeyed his father in all his years, but he knew he must now.  He was the one responsible for her being ill and he
wouldn’t
leave
her.
  Not
considering
the
deathly
state
that
she now
laid
.

“Father,” Seth began, but
whether
his father recognized his tone or saw the determinat
ion in his eyes, he cut him off.

“I’ll hear
no
more, Seth
.  Leave now and go find someone to care
for
this girl.  I’ll s
tay with her until someone
arrives.”

“I’m
sorry,
f
ather, but I
shan’t
leave her.
”
 
Seth
lowered
his head and his
fingers raked
through his hair. 
“
Tis
my fault she
’
s taken il
l and I shall
stay and do what
ever
I can for her.  My conscience
shalt not
allow otherwise.”

“Are you sure
tis
only your conscience speaking, Seth?” he snipped.

Seth didn’t answer
and
broke away from hi
s father’s examining gaze.  He’
d
not lie, but he wouldn’t
admit
the truth, either. 

Truth?
 
H
e didn’t know how he
felt
.
  Something tug
ged
at his heart whenever she
came near
.  He’
d
taken
numerous fancies in the
past
, but
his
feelings
for
other women
didn’t amount
in
to much, and
his sentiment
s
never
c
a
me close in compa
rison
of that which h
e fe
lt
when
Myra
wa
s
with him
.  His mind raced f
or explanation but no
thing
offered
comfort. 

“Do what you must
for now
, Seth.  However,
do not let
your heart fall prey to someone like her
.  Tis not
wise
,
nor
shalt
I tolerate it
!
”

Seth made start of an argument but his father waved him off.
 
“She’s not of your station, Seth.  I think no ill will upon any of these people due to their status, but this
shall
be a splendid, prosperous plantation once we accomplish our
goals
.  I’ll not have it invaded by an outsider who is a thief.  Think of the shame someone like that would place upon our family
and our honorable reputation
.
 
I beseech
you;
do not
be the cause of our family’s ruin
ation
, Seth.”

How could he argue that?  What father would want an indentured—a thief— as an object of his son’s affections
, or worse, as his
son’s
wife
?

Seth nodded.  “My only concern is with he
r health, f
ather.  I have no other intentions.” 

He didn’t lie.  He couldn’t
dispute
his father’s
argument
,
as
her station
was
clearly beneath his.  I
t was
far from appropriate
to have
any thoughts
of her
,
other than that of what she was, a
servant
.  How could he destroy his father’s social class in the
colonies
?  Wasn’t that their reason
s
for taking the journey across the sea? 
Despite not being
paupers while
in England, his father desired more.  They were an upper-middle class family, at best, but the opportunity
in
surpass
ing
that station
was
accomplished in the New World.  With no title
that
backed
his father’s name, and only the use of his hands t
hat
toil
ed and tarried
for
earn
ing
their wealth, he’d not have
accomplish
ed
a hig
her status in England.  Yet there
, in the
colonies
, he
had
already climbed to the top of the social class
es
and gained respect of
their
fellow colonists.  They value
d
him as a man of wealth and reason.  He
had
even acquired a seat at the House of Burgess.  None of that could’ve been possible back in England. 
Seth shook his head, defeated. 
Nay
, he’d
not be the one
who’d
destroy
his father’s dream
, especially since he had sacrificed and worked so hard
to obtain
it
.  It’d
only jeopardize his father’s status, and for what?  A journey led to the unknown by a foolish heart?  

“I’ll stay with her unt
il someone else arrives,
f
ather,
”
he finally conceded.  “Then I’ll take my leave and stay away
her
.”

“I’ll have a servant sent
who’ll
care for her
posthaste
. 
As well as
send
a
field hand
to fetch a
physician
,” his father called out before he departed.

His father took his leave and
Seth reached for
Myra
’s lifeless hand and
caressed the smooth, silk-like
skin between his thumb and finger.  A pang of regret
filled
him.
 
“Whatever these feelings are which erupt from my very being must be
cast
aside,” he whispered.  He brushed his lips across her forehead. “I’m sorry,
Myra
.”
 
He let go of her hand
and it dropped
to
her side
.
  Perhaps it
wa
s
best if Lucia care
d
for her, he considered.  “
Dash
it
,” he
said
when his feet would
n’t
budge.

How could his heart betray him and fall for such a woman? 
A
w
oman
.
  Only a
few months ago he thought she was only a
girl. 
But
for some reason, when he
watched
her and Lucia celebrat
e
what he
had
later learned
marked
Myra
’s
twentieth
year
, he saw her as a woman and no longer a girl. 
T
he curves
on her body
drove him
in
to distraction, and not
only
had he began to view
her as a woman
that day
, but
he
saw her through the eyes of a man. 

He pulled himself from his reverie and tried
chucking
the memory
aside
. 
He wished he
still saw
her as that girl. 
Yearnings for her didn’t haunt him then as they d
id
now. 
He felt pain
ed when he considered that
he’
d
never feel her soft caresses or the velvety touch of her lips on his
, and
it
intensified his
torment. 
E
ven though his heart edged him forward
, he couldn’t place himself in a
position where he’d be forced to choose
between her and his father
.  

Temptation
—
more than he
was able to
bear
—
forced
Seth
into
fle
eing the room, vowing that he’d
never return.

*                    *                    *

The next four days p
laced
Seth in a torturous array of guilt, worry, and agony
that raged
within him.  He did what he
had said
and avoided Myra’s hu
t on the hill, where she yet laid
unconscious.  Only three times
had
Lucia le
ft
the abode for longer than a few moments, and each time
Seth
stopped
himself
from
secretly go
ing
and check
ing
on Myra.  No one in the servant areas talked about her after the first day.  He ran out of excuses
for entering
the areas where the servant women worked and gathered.  Although he hoped
he’d overhear i
nformation about Myra’s we
ll-being, their silence wa
s all he received.  He suspected his father
had
set orders
that kept them silent
.  Household titter-tatter
was
the norm among the maids, and he now found their sudden restraint uncommon.  Someone closed their mouths.  Mayhap, he thought, he could send one of his sisters, surely they
were
concerned.  They
had taken
to Myra the moment they met her, envied and impressed by her refinement, especially for someone
born a common
birth.  It amaze
d
him, too.  His sisters often whisper
ed
about her, and his curiosity lure
d
him
in
to eavesdrop
ping
on many occasions
.  They once discussed that his sister, Rachel,
claimed she overheard Lucia and
Myra
state that
she was from
the
royal
line
.  Of course they laughed and thought it pleasantly amusing, but it angered him
that
Myra didn’t heed his warning.  Even with lies
,
she still
received
his sister
s’ heartfelt affections.  There was
n
o doubt about it, she easily grew
on a person and
was able to
warm
them like a
—
“
A
fever!”