Authors: Natalie Whipple
Blindsided (36 page)
Graham doesn’t answer. I’m not sure he even heard the offer.
Mom frowns. “Maybe I’ll talk with him later, you know, when he’s had time to heal some.”
The Major nods. “I’m sorry for not getting you out sooner, Lauren. We should’ve taken greater precautions.”
Mom bites her lip. “It’s okay. My family was there for me.”
“They certainly were.” He tips his hat, and he leaves without asking about Miles or Lee Seol. I’m grateful for that.
“I hate the Army,” Lee Seol states once he’s gone. “But that dude isn’t so bad. I’d
almost
consider doing a job for him.”
Miles raises an eyebrow. “That’s high praise, coming from you.”
She elbows him. “It is.”
I sit in the recliner, so I can see my whole family there at once. Even though we’re a little bit broken, knowing they’re safe means everything to me. I’m glad I have them to lean on when things get hard. And now that I’ve seen myself I can’t deny how much I belong to them. My face said it all.
Smiling, I finally know what I want to do.
After the ceremony, Seth, Brady and I go for a run in the desert. The path has been battered, and yet the familiarity of this place can never be taken from me. Because it’s my home, no matter who else thinks they can claim it. We stop in front of the cave, take it in.
Seth looks at me, seeming a little nervous. “Are you sure?”
“You could think about it more,” Brady says.
“I don’t need to think about it more.” I walk forward and put my hand to the giant boulder blocking the cave.
“But what if you change your mind?” Seth asks. “You do that sometimes.”
I shoot him a glare. “That’s why we
need
to do it, right?”
They’re both silent, staring at their shoes. I get the sense that, even after all that’s happened, a big part of them doesn’t want to give up this place.
I don’t want to, either. Not really. But sometimes you need to give up things—good things—for the better stuff ahead. “I thought that seeing my reflection would fix everything bad I felt about myself, and it didn’t. I thought a cure would fix the world, but it won’t. I thought we could keep this place without suffering the consequences, but we can’t. I think I’m gonna try accepting life the way it is. Maybe then I’ll be happy with all the really amazing things.”
Brady lets out a sad sigh. “I guess you’re right, but it still sucks that I have to bury it.”
“Yeah.” I lean on the boulder and pull the pill bottle from my pocket. I’ve kept it with me every second since Seth handed it to me, but now I think I’m ready. I pop open the cap and pull out one. “I decided I need my family to see me. They deserve that much after all this.”
“Fair enough.” Seth leans next to me. “What about the rest?”
“I don’t want them anymore.” I smile, never thinking it was possible to feel this way. “It might sound crazy, but I
like
being invisible. I don’t want to be something I’m not anymore.”
Seth smiles to his ears. “You have no idea how glad I am to hear that.”
“I kinda like hearing it, too.” But I also know I might never have come to that conclusion if I hadn’t seen myself. It was a stupid thing to chase, and yet I’m sure I had to do it. With that in mind, I hold out the bottle to Brady. “Here, the rest are yours.”
His blue eyes widen with surprise. “What?”
“I know you need them.” I grab his hand and place the pills in his palm. “Maybe they’ll help you figure out how to be okay with yourself, too. You’ve been trying so hard, but it feels impossible, right?”
Brady wipes at his eyes. “Thanks, Fi.”
“Of course.” I pat his arm. “But you still have to destroy this place first.”
He lets out a short laugh. “Okay, okay. Meet me at home?”
“Sounds good.” Seth grabs my hand, and we take off.
We run like that for a long time, listening to the mountain crumble behind us and watching the horizon open up in front of us. I can’t help feeling like we’re leaving all our troubles behind, and everything ahead is full of miraculous possibilities.
First and foremost, I have to thank Sara O’Connor and the Hot Key Books team for asking me to write more about Fiona and The Pack. Without their desire for a sequel to
Transparent,
this book truly would never have been written. Thank you, everyone, for your support and love for this world I created—it means so much more than I can express.
Secondly, thanks goes to my extraordinary agent, Ginger Clark, who believed I could write this book in six small months and reassured me all along the way. I feel so fortunate to have you on my side! I couldn’t ask for a better publishing ally.
Blindsided
wouldn’t have happened without the tireless encouragement of my two friends and crit partners, Kiersten White and Kasie West, who read this novel as I wrote it, one challenging chapter at a time. Thank you so much for always being there for me, both as writers and friends.
Also, thanks to Michelle Argyle, Jenn Johansson, Renee Collins, Sara Raasch, Stephanie Perkins, Sara Larson, and Candice Kennington for being the best writer friends a girl could ask for. You guys are my Pack, and just like Fiona I’d be lost without you punks.
I have to give a big shout out to Kayla Olsen, who critiqued
Blindsided
in record time, and gave me key feedback to make the book a lot less embarrassing to send off to my editor. And of course thanks goes to Jenny Jacoby, my editor, for making my book so much better with her editing skills. Thanks so much for helping me look smarter than I am.
Last but not least, I owe so much to my family. To my husband, Nick, thank you for supporting me through the crazy drafting and editing, for watching our kids as I ran off to the library so many times, and for being patient with my crazy schedule. You are the best husband of 2013! To my wonderful mother, Kim, and my sweet mother-in-law, Barbara, thank you for taking your big share of hanging out with my kids as well—your support means everything to me. And to my little sister McKenna, thanks for being my biggest fan and always reminding me why I write in the first place. Love you all!
Natalie Whipple, sadly, does not have any cool mutations like her characters. Unless you count the ability to watch anime and Korean dramas for hours on end. Or her uncanny knack for sushi consumption. She currently lives in Utah with her husband and three kids.
Follow Natalie at betweenfactandfiction.blogspot.co.uk or on Twitter:@nataliewhipple
First published in Great Britain in 2014 by Hot Key Books
Northburgh House, 10 Northburgh Street, London EC1V 0AT
Copyright © Natalie Whipple 2014
The moral rights of the author have been asserted.
All rights reserved.
No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored or transmitted in any form by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying or otherwise, without the prior written permission of the publisher.
All characters in this publication are fictitious and any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.
A CIP catalogue record for this book is available from the British Library.
ISBN: 978-1-4714-0216-6
This eBook was produced using Atomik ePublisher
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Hot Key Books is part of the Bonnier Publishing Group
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