Boston Avant-Garde: Impetuous (13 page)

His words sent thoughts swirling inside her head. Reality, perception, expectations, and the nature of family and social position weren’t supposed to be the things you discussed with a fling. Except that Nicolai wasn’t a fling.

“What is this?” She gestured to the two of them. “What are we?”

“Do you really need to slap a label on it?” He caught her hand in his, tugging her closer.

He was warm and vital. Larger than life, larger than reality or social convention, he just was. Calling him her boyfriend was ridiculous, and lover didn’t quite encompass it. The first night she’d been looking for casual sex, but there was nothing casual about this anymore.

He drew her hands up, placing them around his neck and stretching her full length against his body. His chest was bare, the silver bars gleaming in the dim light. He lowered his lips to her neck, carefully avoiding her bruised windpipe and brushing a kiss over the sensitive skin below her ear. “How about sex? That’s a word.”

Heat seared her pussy, arousal tugging at her belly until she couldn’t draw a full breath.

“Or passion?” He slid his hands beneath the T-shirt, splaying them against her rib cage. “That’s a good word.”

She whimpered and squeezed her eyes shut, forcing herself to be patient. His hands moved slowly down her body until he cupped her ass. Her pussy clenched, and she perched on the edge of anticipation for the moment when he would spread her legs and penetrate her body.

“I can smell your arousal.” He pulled her closer, pushing the hard bulge behind his jeans against her. “That’s a good word for you.”

Her nipples were throbbing, pulsing behind the cotton barrier as they pouted their desire to be pressed against him, skin to skin. She contemplated the fact that he’d given her a few kisses and three whispered words, and she was already halfway to orgasm.

“Fuck.”

She opened her eyes and stared up into his face. “Is that one of your words?”

“No, it’s what I need to do to you right now before my dick strangles to death in my jeans.”

She let go of his neck and reached for his fly. His cock spilled into her hands, warm and hard. She pushed impatiently at his jeans, feeling a desperate sense of urgency.

“Don’t bother with those. Just hold on to my neck.”

She gasped when he plucked her right off the floor.

“I’m going to take you right now, Desiree.”

His big hands supported her thighs, holding her open as he slid his thick cock deep into her core. She cried out at the abrupt invasion, not in pain but exquisite pleasure. Nothing had ever felt so right.

She felt cold brick at her back. He’d pressed her against the bare surface of a pillar only a step or two away from the piano. The heat of his body was a stark contrast, the sensations blending together. He drove his hips up and in, thrusting deeply until she was crying out with each stroke.

Her eyes fluttered open, and she found herself meeting his intense gaze. Emotion flickered like candlelight across his face. The muscles in his jaw drew taut, softening and then growing harsh as he approached his climax. She loosened her grip, trusting him to hold her. Cupping his cheek in her palm, she brushed her thumb over his lower lip before leaning in and kissing him deeply.

She used her tongue to mimic the movement of his cock in her pussy. The rhythm increased until her nerves sang with the need to come. He growled, thrusting hard, his shaft pulsating inside her body as he spilled his seed deep into her womb. Nipping his lower lip, she shattered into orgasm.

Her body was limp, her muscles too sated to move. She rested her cheek against his shoulder and soaked up the scent of him. She was beginning to wonder if she’d ever get enough of him.

He nuzzled her neck. “Do you still need a word?”

“Why? Do you have another one?”

“Again.” He didn’t let her go, supporting her with both arms as he carried her toward the stairs. “That’s a good word.”

Casual sex wasn’t supposed to make you feel like this. She brushed his face with her fingertips and said the one word she shouldn’t have. “Always.”

Desiree shifted uncomfortably from one foot to the other as she waited for her brother to answer his front door. She had keys, but ever since Erik had married Talia, Desiree had felt as if it would be horribly rude just to walk into their home.

She felt like a vagabond. She wore a pair of sweats she’d rolled half a dozen times at the waist and ankles, one of Nicolai’s T-shirts, and a pair of socks. Her dress from the night before had been a total loss, but she wasn’t ready to go home for a change of clothing. That left her either naked or wearing her current ensemble. While Nicolai might not mind her strutting around in the buff, she wasn’t quite that brave just yet.

Beside her, Nicolai was a rock-solid presence. She felt like a little girl. She should’ve been able to do this on her own. She was a grown woman, but she was glad he’d come. She hadn’t had to ask him. He’d simply called a cab and got in with her.

She reached down and took his hand. “Thank you.”

The heat in his brown eyes warmed her from head to toes. He looked as if he was about to say something, but the door swung wide open before he could answer.

“Come in!” Talia’s friendly expression didn’t chase away Desiree’s case of nerves. “It’s so good to see you both.”

Still clutching Nicolai’s hand, Desiree followed her sister-in-law into the foyer. She’d only been back to her brother’s town house a few times since he’d married. It felt odd to be a guest in a place she’d once called her home away from home. “You haven’t changed much since you moved in.”

Talia brushed her fingers over the oiled railing as she started up the steps. “It didn’t need changing, Dee Dee. The first time I walked in here I thought it looked like the place was just waiting for a family.”

Desiree sighed at the use of her hated nickname and put her standard fallback smile on full display. “And now you’re having one.”

“Josh told me he accidentally let the cat out of the bag the other day.” She took a few more steps and turned. “Erik feels really badly that he didn’t tell you first. It’s my fault. I didn’t want your mother to hear about it until we were past the first trimester. Setting her up for disappointment is on my short list of stupid ideas.”

“I understand.” And she did, sort of. Desiree understood that her brother loved this woman more than anything in the whole world, including his sister. As to the implication, intentional or otherwise, that Desiree would somehow let the secret slip to her mother? She wasn’t even going to tackle that one. Not right now. Not with all this Selena shit to worry about.

Talia looked over Desiree’s outfit. “You’ve still got a closet full of clothes in the guest room if you want to go and change.”

“That would be fantastic, thank you.”

“I’ll wait right here.” Nicolai’s hand settled in the small of her back, a patch of warmth that contrasted with the clammy feeling creeping over the rest of her body. She’d known him less than a week, but she was more comfortable with him than with the members of her own family.

Desiree pushed open the guest room door and sighed as it clicked shut behind her. The airy blue and white decor was studded with navy accents. It was elegant and understated. At one time it had felt like home.

This was no time to wallow in self-pity. She strode across the cream-colored carpet to the walk-in closet. Erik had once called his town house her base of operations. Meaning she used his closets to store her overflow purchases when Sachs or Bergdorfs had a sale she couldn’t pass up.

She chose a patterned Dior chiffon skirt that hit her midthigh and a cute wool jacket, both in purple. The darker hue of the skirt set off her tanned legs and made her feel graceful. She chose all her clothing to downplay her larger build. Desiree pulled out a pair of trusty black heels she kept on hand for emergencies and buckled them on with a sigh. Now she felt seminormal.

She took a quick look in the mirror of the en suite bathroom and knew she didn’t have enough time or supplies to fix her appearance. A quick wash and a run-through with a brush would have to do. The woman who stared back at her looked haunted, like a homeless person. Which she sort of was. It was a disheartening thought.

Where was home anyway? She’d been living on the family estate her whole life, but that wasn’t home. It was more like a prison. So why did she stay? Why was she so convinced her mother would fall to pieces if Desiree moved out and started living her own life? Did it matter? Or was she waiting for that one moment when her mother finally woke up and saw Desiree for who she really was?

Someone tapped on the bedroom door. “Desiree?”

“Just about done.” Desiree didn’t want Talia coming in to have one of her heart-to-heart chats. This was just not a good time.

She reappeared in the hallway, a tingle sliding down her spine when Nicolai gave her an appreciative once-over. “Feel better?”

She reached for the hand he offered, thrilling to the feel of their fingers lacing together. “I do, thanks. I’ll get your clothes laundered as soon as possible.”

“I’d rather you keep them. I like seeing you in my clothes.”

“That will be a new, very un-Dee Dee-like look.” Talia stifled a giggle before opening her and Erik’s bedroom door. “Erik’s in the study at the end of the hall. I’m going to lie down for a bit. I’m so tired these days I find myself nodding off at the worst times.”

“Thanks, Talia, and just to let you know, I’m really happy for you and my brother.”

“We’ll talk more later, pretty Talia,” Nicolai rumbled.

The familiarity in his tone gave Desiree a jolt. She waited for Talia’s door to close before giving in to the urge to turn and stare. “Why do I get the feeling the two of you know each other awfully well?”

He tugged a lock of her hair. “Your brother brought Talia to the bar the first night they met.”

“How did everybody but me know about that place?”

“How come Talia calls you Dee Dee?”

Desiree made a choking noise designed to let him know exactly how she felt about her childish nickname. “My mother calls me that. I think Talia must’ve thought it was a family thing, so she started doing it too.”

“So tell her to stop.”

“I don’t want to hurt her feelings.” He made it sound so simple.

“It’s not you, right?”

She shook her head.

“So tell them the truth. Tell them who you are.”

Right there in the narrow hallway, he drew her close to his body. It was hard not to be distracted by the feel of him. She was itching to lift his black T-shirt and tug on the twin barbells piercing his nipples.

His expression left no doubt he could read her mind. “Do that and I’ll be forced to find a bedroom.”

“I’d be just as happy to undress as I was to dress.”

He lowered his head and took her mouth in a gentle kiss. “When we get home, I’m going to strip you naked and keep you that way for the rest of the day.”

When we get home
. She refused to dwell on the significance of his words. If she tried to analyze everything he said, she’d drive herself insane.

“Are the two of you ever going to make it into my study? Or am I going to have to give you a moment’s privacy right here in the hallway?”

Desiree jerked at the sound of her brother’s voice, but Nicolai didn’t seem ruffled in the least. He shot her brother a pointed stare before giving her another slow, sensuous kiss.

“Yes, yes, I get it that you two lovebirds are really into each other.” Erik leaned against the doorjamb. “However, you were the one who was in a hurry to see me, Desiree.”

She did need to talk to her brother. Pulling away from Nicolai, she trudged the last few feet to the den and stepped inside. “I guess we should just get this over with.”

Erik settled himself in a leather chair, leaving them the sofa. “This relationship isn’t a grievous sin against me. Nicolai’s a great guy, but if you’re here to ask my advice, I’ll give it to you straight. Staying with Nicolai will never get you want you want in life. If this is what you want, that’s your business, but I’m not going to give it my blessing until you slow down and think it through.”

The idea of asking Erik for his advice or his blessing about her relationship with Nicolai was ludicrous. She settled herself on the leather seat, automatically scooting as close to Nicolai as she could. The heat of him there beside her was reassuring. “You think I’m here to talk to you about our relationship?”

Her brother didn’t lose his confident demeanor very often. Seeing it slide from his face was perversely satisfying. “Then why are you here?”

“To talk about Selena’s asshole fiancé.”

“You want to talk about Jackson?”

This was harder than she’d expected. There really weren’t good words for the kind of bombshell accusation she was about to make. At least not polite ones. She cleared her throat and went for direct. “Jackson tried to force himself on me last night.”

Erik’s gaze flickered from her to Nicolai. “Force himself? As in, our younger sister’s fiancé tried to rape you?”

“He’s made comments before. Ask Joshua. He told me to make certain I didn’t find myself alone with Jackson.” Desiree clasped her hands tightly in her lap. “But I had to attend the charity auction last night in Selena’s place.”

“Where did this happen?” Erik pushed to his feet and began pacing agitated circles between his chair and the executive desk at the far end of the room. “If you were never alone, how could he force himself on you?”

“I said he tried, not that he succeeded. He trapped me in a corner. I managed to give him the slip.” An overwhelming sense of gratitude hit her hard. When she’d been huddling in the back of the cab in a ripped dress with no shoes and no money, the sound of Nicolai’s voice had been akin to an angel’s.

Erik sliced the air with one hand. “Why am I only hearing about this now?”

“I took a cab to Jack’s after it happened.”

“Why?”

She felt Nicolai’s gaze and turned to meet it. “That was where I wanted to be.”

“Did you go to the hospital?”

“Nicolai wanted to take me, but I wouldn’t go. I’ve got some bruises, but they’ll heal. The hospital would’ve called the police.”